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So… It was a ridiculous weekend of injuries with the NBA pulling its best NFL impression.  “Look how many people we can hurt too!”  Right now the safest big sport might be hockey… The survivors of this NBA-wide injury bug should barricade themselves in a giant prison.  OK, so that’s not exactly the best analogy… Look out for the Governor!  Arguably the biggest injury over the weekend was another knee giving out for Derrick Rose, who tore his meniscus and is having surgery some time today.  This is about the worst thing that could’ve happened for fantasy this season.  No, not because I’m a Rose owner… But because of all the Rose questions!  Of course this would happen for a second straight year.  So obligatory memo, statement, press release – Razzball’s official stance on answering questions on Rose will involve no guesses or speculation to his return!  Well, Pete, Slim, & Dan can… I guess.  But I’m not doing this again!  “Hey JB, when’s the end of the world?”  “When am I going to win the lottery?”  “How in God’s green earth did the Patriots win last night?”  “When will the Spurs finally kick out all the vets and give Kawhi Leonard superstar touches?!”  I just don’t have the answers!  We saw Russell Westbrook go down with a meniscus injury, only to need a second clean-up surgery.  Rose has said he’s leaning towards a reattachment procedure that would cost him the season, plus Rose has his other knee just off the ACL.  His knees have gone the way of Kyle’s knees in that South Park episode after his expletive-plasty.  Hopefully Rose’s surgeon is part-Borg and can get something mechanical going on in there.  “He’s more machine now than man…” Dude, I just crossed sci-fi swords there in a major fail… Here’s what else went down across fantasy hoops over the weekend:

Marc Gasol – The other big injury.  Has a Grade 2 sprain of his MCL.  Yikes.  Gasol has a more definable timetable of 6-8 weeks floating out there and doesn’t have to go under the knife.  And that’s a saving grace for surgeons as I don’t think any operating tables are that big!  I saw a couple comments get in over the weekend about the injury, and I think Gasol should be a hold in almost all leagues, even without IR spots.  I just think his upside is too big to cut and let someone else snatch him up on the wire.  And when he’s back, he’ll get his minutes as his knee allows, which I don’t think is comparable for a guy like Larry Sanders, who has been cut in a lot of leagues as well.  Send Gasol get well soon cards and hope you can eat the lost time!

Trey Burke – Was inserted into the starting line-up yesterday, and shot like Gordon Hayward!  Going to be a season long joke…  Went 2-9 in just over 20 minutes for 4/2/4.  Yikes.  Two straight blurbs with yikes… Bust out the Thesauras!  What do we have here… ummm… no results!  Eff you Thesaurs.com!  Brutal game for Burke, but at least he didn’t get hurt.

Marvin Williams – Started as well in a big Jazz shake-up.  The most fantasy relevant 73 point game for a team in recent memory.  I had to put “for a team” in there as to not mislead you into thinking Marvin dropped 70+!  Hey, us Heels fans are flying high after beating the Pitinos… Anyway, I think Marvin is a solid role player, and while the stat sheets have been filling out decently before this start, I’m not his biggest fan for fantasy.  Disappointed last night for 4/3/0/1/1 in 22 minutes.  Only an add in the deepest of leagues, even with the starting role.

Enes Kanter – “Cause you had a bad day! You’re taking one down!  You sing a sad song…” You get the picture.  Benched then sprained his ankle.  Look out 2012 Charlotte Bobcats!  Jazz are coming for ya.  The fact they had to do X-Rays is no good news, plus we’ve seen ankle injuries derail some players thus far.  Droppable in most leagues even though I like him, in the deepest of leagues like REL, a semi-buy low.  Williams would continue to start at the 4 in the interim most likely.

Jeremy Evans – I couldn’t believe he went 11-11 in his first two games this year!  Pretty remarkable… Finally missed a shot going 1-2 2/6/1/1/1 in 18 minutes last night.  He’s got some raw-athletic upside and a starter’s role upside with Richard Jefferson and Marvin your starting Jazz Fs.  Worth a look in deep leagues.

Diante Garrett – So I’m a little biased as his REL owner, but he keeps being a useful NBA player.  He’s not going to all the sudden pull a Lin-sanity, but 7/1/2 in 21 minutes and the only player over 11 minutes for the Jazz that was a plus in +/- on the court.  He single-handedly almost brought the Jazz back against the Mavs on Friday, not playing until the third quarter going 3-3 for 7 Pts 8 Asts in 16 minutes in a crazy comeback charge.  His last four games he has a 21:3 AST:TO ratio.  John Lucas III went from starter to 7 minutes yesterday, and I think Garrett is in line for backup-PG minutes and some time on the court with Trey Burke against small backcourts at times.  Only a guy to keep an eye on in the deepest of leagues, but he looks great when he’s on the court.

Reggie Jackson – 10/3/7/2 last night in a surprise start with Westbrook getting the night off.  Decent line in 26 minutes, but I think it’d shock you that the 7 dimes are a season-high.  Why I don’t think Jackson needs to be owned right now in 10 or 12 teamers.

Steven Adams – Slim’s boyfriend went 3/7/2/1/0 in 27 minutes of run, but coughed up 4 TOs.  Everyone and their mother knows Kendrick Perkins is hot garbage, so I’m with Slim he has upside and worth a stash in deep leagues.  He looked good last Thursday when I last saw him play.

Kentavious Caldwell-Pope – Shooting worse than me trying to aim at a solo cup instead of a urinal.  It’s a long way down for me, OK!  2-10 yesterday for 5 points, a steal, and a three.  Fin, that’s it.  Now 11 for 45 in his last 4.  At least he’s starting which is good for my REL, but it’s getting brutal and may not last that long.  Wish Thesaurus had come up with some words for yikes… Hey, at least the kid has 3 TOs on the ENTIRE SEASON!  And only one in the past 10 with 2 in his debut.  Pretty crazy, even for a shoot-first guy, to average 0.3 TOs a game in 20+ minutes.

Josh Smith – Returned to the starting line-up for 13/8/3/3/0 and a three.  You’ll take it.  Stop being late for practices!

Rodney Stuckey – Despite the steady decline the past few years, won’t go away with a big 27/4/6/2 yesterday.  I’ve never liked Stuckey, but this 6th man role is doing wonders.  I mean, it’ll give anyone confidence watching KCP try to make a basket!  Still not a full believer, but worth an add for scoring and a handful of dimes in 12 teamers.  But it won’t be me.

Andre Drummond – In the epic battle of Razzball readers vs. JB on Andre the Giant, had a subpar 9/10/0/1/0 shooting 4-6 but 1-4 from the stripe.  Just over 27 minutes, but that is going to become the norm because teams will start Banging the Drummond Slowly!

Joe Johnson – Trying his best to make the Nets salvage this season.  Wasn’t this supposed to be a contending team?!  Yikes… Dammit Thesaruas!  Enough of that…  34/2/4 on a hot 12-18 shooting and ridiculous 8-10 from three point land.  Who is this guy, Arron Afflalo?

Shaun Livingston – A meh-of-a 4/2/7 game, and banged his head hard in the 4th quarter and had to exit.  No word yet if he suffered a concussion or will miss any time.  If he doesn’t miss a start, I still think he’s fringe-ownable in 12-teamers with the assists upside and terribleness of everyone else unable to create on their own.  Deron Williams is still day-to-day, and while they desperately need him, I don’t think anyone wants him to push it.  If both are gone, Tyshawn Taylor might have to start as the Nets PG.  The QB for the Ravens?  No that’s Tyrod Taylor!  I’m so confused… The Nets are dropping like flies!

Mike Dunleavy – Another start, 14/2/3 of decent production for very deep leaguers.  Should get a lot of run the rest of the season.

Marquis Teague – He’s not very good, he shot 0-7 yesterday, but I still gambled on his upside in REL in hopes to completely tank my FG% pairing him with KCP…. Just kidding… Unfortunately my $22 bid could’ve been $4 and won.  Perils of FAAB in such a deep league.  I thought some bidding would be made on a very possible starting role should Kirk Hinrich suffer another injury in what has plagued his career.  Plus I needed PG eligible guys.

Chris Paul – Another dub-dub with dimebags, dishing out 17.  Getting pretty unreal.

Jared Dudley – What the hey?!  21 points yesterday, but only 1 Reb and 1 Ast to go with it.  He shot 8-10 and 4-5 from deep.  He and Kendrick Perkins are the first two picks on my elite hot garbage team.

DeAndre Jordan – Now this was the Dudley.  2/7/2 with one block in 27 minutes.  Did Vinny Del Negro coach this game?!  Sheesh.  The Clips destroyed the Rose-less Bulls and they didn’t need a DJ.  Kinda like getting married to someone who’s family is an A Capella group.

Antawn Jamison – Made his debut in mop up duty.  Any time I hear “mop up” I think of Michael Ironside in Starship Troopers.  I guess that makes Jamison mobile infantry…

Gerald Green – Won’t go away as Eric Bledsoe is killing fantasy owners with a shin bruise.  Green with a 20/8/2/2/0 line shooting 4-9 from deep.  Bledsoe reportedly warmed up, but couldn’t get the shin… warm?  I dunno, I guess it’s a deep bone bruise.  Green I don’t think can sustain value when both Bledsoe and Dragic are out there, but both are proving indurable.  Which isn’t a word.  How about feeble?  Didn’t even need that cursed website to cook up that one!

Victor Oladipo – Another near rainbow line in his third start, going 6/5/5/2/1 in a whopping 40 minutes.  Shot only 3-12 with another 4 TOs (he was leading the NBA in TOs for a bit), but you’re loving the multi-cat.

Glen Davis – Returned over the weekend for a big debut of 7-13 20/5/1/2/0 in 27 minutes on Saturday, then 22 minutes of 6/4/4/2/1 near-rainbow last night.  More on the Magic-mess below:

Tobias Harris – The return is nigh, nay, here!  Just over 16 minutes yesterday going 3-8 for 6/1 and nada.  With Glen Davis returning (Baby back!  …ribs…) the game prior, it’s all the sudden a jumbled mess with Afflalo getting the run at the 3 with VO at the 2.  Andrew Nicholson was a little hot and got a surprise 26 minutes, the most in three weeks.  Then there’s Maurice Harkless starting as of now too, getting a very low 14-minute run yesterday.  It’s a mess.  I like Harris the most, but I don’t think he’s a sure-fire must add.  Sucks for him coming off what he did last year to be slowed by the ankle.

Shawne Williams – He’s been a really under-the-radar producer with a near-rainbow last night of 3/6/2/1/3 hitting a three pointer as his scoring.  Shot only 1-6, but in the deepest of leagues, he can give you some surprise counting stats available everywhere.

Xavier Henry – The return of Wheels!  Welcome back!  21/2 and ummm, two threes!  And ummmm… 3 TOs… Yup that’s it, but he can rack up some points when he’s hot.

Steve Blake – Another dimebag.  I called it for real and a must-own a while ago.  I am a happy Blake owner in a few leagues.  Mugatu voice: “Happy!  Happy! Hahahahaha!”

Jordan Hill – He’s pretty much a dub-dub guy every single night now… Ridley’s Believe it or Not!  10/13 with a block.

Blake Griffin – Had to have his elbow drained after yesterday’s game.  I guess it puts a ton of stress on his elbow to block shots (three against the Bulls yesterday) and that’s why he rarely does it.  I still don’t get why a leaper like him can’t block more!  Doesn’t look like he’ll miss much, if any time.

Spencer Hawes – Missed Saturday’s game with knee soreness.  Lavoy Allen got the start at the 5 against the Pacers and got a near rainbow line of 4/9/2/1/2 with Thaddeus Young out for his third game due to personal matters. Still, most leagues want none of the cleaner-uppers while Hawes and Young are out.

Michael Carter-Williams – The up-and-down season continues!  11-21 29/6/3/7/1 huge line with only 2 TOs.  That’s so up that you don’t mind the valleys.

Tony Wroten – Strained his back.  Probably from carrying MCW around while his foot was hurt.

Six(er) Shooters – Evan Turner went 8-26 and James Anderson 4-18 on Saturday.  KCP and Gordon Hayward would fit right into Philly’s line-up.

Roy Hibbert – Offensive outburst!  No, not like Michael Richards, but a season-high 27 raising his scoring average to 12.2 or about what you’d expect.

Raymond Felton – Can’t get his hip working.  He’s probably not back until next Friday when it’s the battle of the UNC PGs at Denver.  I’m still holding in most leagues, but shallower 10-teamers can definitely move on.

John Wall – Blew it up over the weekend with two 30+ point games on Friday and Saturday.  What kind of moron woulda had Wall as a first-rounder though?! He’s still not shooting ridiculously well but it’s passable, as I told you he has added some 3-point shooting (1.2 a game) and the TOs are bad, but way down per/48 from last year and career averages.  Nice to see something right!

James Harden – Expected to miss tonight’s game.  Maybe he should get some Rogaine on his toes and grow out his toe hair so it’ll be more beard-ly.

Milwaukee Bucks – They’re terrible and Larry Drew said there will be some starting line-up shake-ups.  John Henson might start!  And he called the team selfish while Brandon Knight had 7 Asts in 26 minutes.  Sure he shot 1-8, so it wasn’t exactly like he was only passing, but if his hammy is holding up, I like both of them to get a little run as starters.  Plus Khris Middleton was the only guy who did anything against the Bobcats going 8-13 (2-2 3PTM) 20/4/2/1/0 with no turnovers, so he could be in the mix as well.  Caron Butler was awful going 2-8 after dropping 38 Pts out of nowhere on Friday night.  His AST:TO is atrocious on the year, not boding well for a coach calling out “selfish” play.  Volatile in Brew Crew Nation.

LaMarcus Aldridge – Goromotaro!  Rainbow Line!  He does it all!  Huge 30/21/3/3/3 line in Saturday’s win over the Warriors.  Huge line after a rough 4-20 shooting game on Friday.  I tried buying him in REL when he was put on the block, but it didn’t end up working.  Thanks for checking your trade on Sunday Night after this line instead of hitting accept!

Andre Iguodala – Strained his hammy and out indefinitely.  Another casualty of a weekend of injuries.  Tough news for Iggy owners who were flying high.

Harrison Barnes – Most own in all leagues now.  Got a huge 45 minute run on Saturday for 4-12 13/4/5/1/0 with two threes.  I think he can improve vastly on that and be big while Iggy is out.

Stephen Curry – Returned to action and shared a dimebag!  I guess medicinal marijuana helped him get back from the head injury.

Klay Thompson – 30 points!  2 threes!  1 Reb 1 Ast 1 Stl 4 TOs.  ThrAGNOF!

Corey Brewer – My hero.  It’s going a lot bet than Omri Casspi!  22 points and 5 steals for one of my better calls.

Aaron Brooks – What in the wide world of sports?!  26 points on Saturday?!  This one was baffling.  With Harden out, Brooks got hot coming off the bench for 10-14 shooting and 6-7 3PTM.  Not too much to see here though.

Kelly Olynyk – Set to miss about two weeks with a sprained ankle.  Hey, that’ll happen when you wander the desert!  Jared Sullinger is playing well and should man the 5, but cracks open the door for former waiver-wire favey Vitor Faverani, who got just over 14 minutes for 11/5 with a block and a three.  It’s a small crack though.  A fissure.

Matthew Dellavedova – An out of nowhere 14 points on 6-8 shooting on Saturday, for 14/2/2/4/0 and a three.  Poor man’s Corey Brewer?  I actually kinda think so, Mike Brown likes him and hates what he’s seeing from his other 2s.

Jarrett Jack – Strained his neck in the blowout, helping Della V get the minutes.  We still don’t know the severity, so it could be minor and just him crying.  “Wahhhhhhhhh, I’m Jarrett Jack!”

 

Next Games: I’ve got three tonight with BOS @ CHA, DEN @ DAL, and NYK @ POR.  Nothing really stands out in any of these, except hoping to see the Blazers go 11 in a row.  Hope you crushed in week 4 and good luck in week 5!