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So imagine you’re heading into fantasy hoops last night, wondering what the headline would be.  You knock on the mansion’s door and Tim Curry is standing there all snippity-proper.  You say, “Hey, Timmy, someone is gonna kill it tonight!”  Could it be, Colonel Larry Sanders Mustard?  Nope!  His vision is too blurred to be the culprit.  And no, it’s not because he topped off his third bottle of Cristal just to have another blunt weapon, it’s because he got poked in the eye!  Could it be Reverend Jeff Green?  No way, he had his big night a few games ago, we all know it’ll be at least another two weeks until another good one!  So it’s surprise suspect #3, Professor Mason Plumlee, who went all Krzyzewki on the Pelicans leading the Nets in Pts Rebs Stls and Blks for a 22/13/0/3/2 line.  Shot 8-10, 6-9 from the stripe, and made Anthony Davis lose a wee bit of hair on his Brow.  “I’m supposed to be the high-flying big man in this game, Mason!”  The crowd wasn’t chanting MVP for ya in this one!  Awww, that’s mean.  After playing under 12 minutes the previous two, Plumlee got 28+ in the past two games and productive in both.  Keep Kevin Garnett at 13 minutes a game, Kidd!  I think a good way to approach Plumlee right now is like James Johnson.  Puts up solid stats all around (although a little less all-around than JJ) when he gets the minutes.  I think he’s gotten himself to fringe 12-team worthy depending on your roster comp.  Definitely needs to get scooped up in deeper.  I think enough minutes will be there for him to fill in some Pts/Rebs/Blks.  Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in fantasy hoops:

Kevin Martin – Broke his thumb, but won’t require surgery.  Luckily it’s his left non-shooting thumb, but it still is theorized to be over a month.  Go ahead and Chapter 11 K-Mart.

Ty Lawson – Fractured a rib on Saturday.  He said afterwards he didn’t know what happened.  Memory loss!  Needs concussion testing.  Is doubtful for tonight (duh, he broke his rib!) and remains very day-to-day.  Not doing anything drastic with him, definitely don’t sell at a discount.

Kobe Bryant – Quoted as saying he still plans to return this year.  Yeah, well, I planned on winning the lottery and buying Texas!  And by Texas, I mean the island in Dubai world islands thingy.  But that would’ve been a bad investment!  I still think you can leave Kobe on the wire in 12-teamers unless you’ve locked up a high seed going into the playoffs.  And even then.  Fishy.  Like my island would be!

Chris Paul – Backstreet’s Back, Alright!  Played 23 minutes for 7/2/8/4/0.  This game against the 76ers was neck-and-neck the whole way, so shocked he didn’t get more minutes.  Psyche!  Clippers won by like, 200.  Mercy rule!  Solid line to end your week and you’re psyched (used again!) for the rest of the year.

DeAndre Jordan – They say hindsight is 20/20… DeAndre went 10/20!  Does that mean he can see into the past?  “You can read minds?”  “It’s where you throw up after every meal!”  Plus four blocks.  He’s such a Merman.

Tony Wroten – The only Sixer who showed up.  21/3/2/3/0 in 23 minutes and I think he needs to be owned by all playoff bound teams.  I’ve said this so many times, and just want to keep reminding you.  Brittle Michael Carter-Williams is gonna get shut down!  Wroten still owned in only 10% of leagues.  In 100% of leagues that have playoffs, there are teams playoffs bound.  So he should be owned everywhere!

Anderson Varejao – We’ve always known he’s brittle, and after returning from the hyperextended knee now has a jacked up hand.  Mike Brown said postgame, “The only thing that isn’t hurting [Varejao] are his curls.”  Oh, ha-ha Mike Brown, you’re effing hilarious.  Maybe focus on winning more than two games outta eight, broheim.

RainbOladipo – 23/4/4/2/0 and the Magic upset the Pacers.  I wonder what the spread was on this game.  Probably something close to Glen Davis‘ waist size.  Hey oh!  V.O. was the Magic’s best player, hit a three, did have the 4 TOs, but hey, we all know that’s part of the shindig.

Marc Gasol – Rainbow line!  8/9/5/3/4 and close to a double-bow.  He’s still not been what everyone had hoped, but the multi-cat is a solid step forward.

Nick Calathes – Still ballin’.  17/5/6/1/0, shot 7-9, hit two threes, helped me get an upset win in REL, and is an Achilles amongst sheer neck-tattooed mortals.  Did have 6 TOs.  His Achilles heel if you will…

Tristan Thompson vs. Andray Blatche – Slim, I think it’s safe to say neither of these guys should be close to fantasy teams and there is no winner.  Haha.  Blatche for 6/1/0/0/0 and 3 TOs and TT for 4/3/2/1/1 (multi-cat?!) with Blatche losing time to the emerging Plumlee and TT sucking it up during a regime-change.

Tyreke Evans – Got a non-injury related DNP.  Something is rotten in Djibouti.  Wait, Denmark.  Went with the wrong D country.  That’s how to fool that stupid mind-trick thing!  No one has any idea what I’m talking about…

Jared Sullinger – Huge 31/16 on Friday and decent 11/12 yesterday.  Remember when I told you to hang tough for him!  Let’s do this Sully!

Steve Nash – The NBA’s most durable player had a shocking injury and had to leave early yesterday.  Should be ready to go for tomorrow though.  Like Kobe, he “plans” on playing every game, but not every plan works out!

Joakim Noah – Rainbow!  Filling up the stat sheet like Noah fills the shower drain…

Ryan Kelly – Lost a ton of minutes in a disappear fest.  Kelly might finally be the inspiration to let Jordan Hill play a lot!

Chris Kaman – You know, for as bad as where I had him ranked, this is the sorta thing I thought he could do from time to time.  27/10/3/0/2, of course I didn’t expect him to score 20+, but shot 13-23, is big and gets in the way for some rogue blocks and boards.   Just enough to, well, you know – his name in my pants.  But alas, Doh-toni wanted to play Robert Sacre… I hate the Lakers.

Kendall Marshall – Despite coming off the bench, still slingin’ the dimebags!  But I don’t expect it to keep up.  My chips are all going into the Steve Blake basket, even though he had a rough one yesterday.  It’s turning into a “pick-your-PG” carnival game!  The winner gets a giant stuffed Monstar Shawn Bradley from Space Jam.  That wouldn’t be creepy…

Jeff Green trade rumors – Gossip girl tweeted out that he might be on the block to the Hawks for a DeMarre Carroll deal.  XOXO – Gossip Girl!  Wow, I am so much less of a man for knowing that.  Damn women taking the TV!  Why you gotta have an iPad to watch sports… Anyway, I think the Hawks would be nuts to make that move.  Carroll is playing great and they need a C not another wing.  Yes, that’s me hoping Mike Scott can hold onto his minutes!

Raymond Felton – What the h?!  Playing like a decent fantasy asset?!  Say it ain’t so!  16/7/7 with a pair of treys yesterday.  Felton just heard “pair of trays” and starting salivating at the thought of another Golden Corral trip.  Does Golden Corral even have trays?  Never been!  Suck it obesity!

Trey Burke – Needs to hit up Shaq for an icy hot patch.  I think I made that joke last week at some point.  But I like it!  Back pain and is making it really really hard for me to keep pumping him up as a buy low/hold…

Jonas Valanciunas – Got hit in the tummy and is day-to-day.  While he’s not really doing anything new stat wise, this will make your day.  Buy a vowel!

 

I hope everyone had a solid weekend and is pumped to start up week 16!  The All-Star Break is just around the corner so get amped up for the dunk contest.  I busted out my Fisher Price basket just to reenact the dunks in my living room…

From Around The Web

  1. Frank White says:
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    Hey Man… I picked up Patrick Mills cause he’s been lighting it up but IDK how long that will last. I’m tied for 2nd place but my team’s been getting beat-up for a while and it’s a close race. Should I keep him or pickup Tony Wroten?? 2- What do yOU mean by Carter Williams getting shut down?? Taken out early or getting beat up??

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Frank White: Yeah I don’t think long… I would get Wroten. You’re in 2nd place and what I mean by MCW is he’ll get benched late in the season since the 76ers are awful anyway. Either by minor injury or not.

  2. E says:
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    Drop Amir Johnson for Kaman?

    Is Amir droppable in 12 team, 12 roster spot league in general?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @E: Yeah Amir is collapsing… I think I would but be prepared to move on from Kaman when Gasol is back and/or Dantoni jacking up minutes again

  3. Don Majkowski says:
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    Traded Collison & Kris Kardashian for Kawhi abou 10 days ago…

    Feel like I have a sick team (14 team H2H) heading into playoffs, and currently in 1st place…

    Trade deadline is Wednesday, team as all banged up to hell, but think I will be set for the playoffs…would you recommend making any moves, or just sit tight and wait for team tyo get healthy for playoffs?

    PG – Westbrook/Reggie Jax, Teague, Nash/Marshall
    SG – Kevin Martin, Wroten
    SF – Kawhi, Marion
    Bigs – ALove, Brow, Bosh, Favors, Taj

    Thoughts?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Don Majkowski: Nice! Love it given your standing. Kevin Martin is my only question mark, I don’t know how much he’ll do if he’s indeed out a month+. That said, you can afford to wait it out. Love that you have Wroten! And the rest of your team is nasty for 14er

  4. The Tristan Thompson Conundrum says:
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    Wellllllll I might be done for the year… lost 2-7 and am now in 5th place… my team is garbage aside from CP3 and Lebron and borderline Rudy Gay. I’m thinking of dropping Marion for maybe Tobias who’s still not getting blocks or steals or for Kendall Marshall. I already have Steve Blake so it prob wouldnt make sense to have both him and Kedall but my team is never going to win points cat. against the good teams and I am about .500 in Rebounds cat. so I’m thinking punt points for the most part, and try to win threes, blocks, steals, ft%, and TOs or FG%. Idk JB what do you think is it viable for a desperate team? and I know blake and marshall are gonna add up the TOs.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @The Tristan Thompson Conundrum: Ugh yeah you were injury ravaged! Happens to the best of us… Ummm, the Tobias move seems fine, I would just be prepared to make drastic stream moves in close cats to be sure you get into the playoffs. If it’s Sunday and it’s neck and neck in two close cats, be ready to drop Harris again for someone playing. Well this week it would be Thursday so even more important

      • The Tristan Thompson Conundrum says:
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        @JB Gilpin: What do you think of offering Lebron and Beal for Curry and Klay Thompson?

  5. Jason MacLeod says:
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    Plumlee or Mike Scott?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Jason MacLeod: Depends on needs, probably take upside of PLumlee since Scott is mostly only a scorer. And I love Scott

  6. matt says:
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    JB, Come join my RCL. Would love to play against you “It’s the one with ROOSTER as the Password

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @matt: Haha in baseball? Wish I could man, just in way too many leagues… Especially with NBA still going to be wrapping up when baseball starts. Will be too busy…

  7. Corey says:
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    Marion, rkelly, kaman, or Amir? Please rank 9 cat h2h

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Corey: Still Marion, then Amir Kaman Kelly looking at ROS. Short term, move Kaman up one

  8. Jake VZ says:
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    Sup JB? Would you trade Harden for George? 11 Cat, 2 reb, DD

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Jake VZ: Hmmmm. Very very close at this point. I think I’d narrowly hold Harden

  9. Jake VZ says:
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    Actually I just sent the offer My Harden, Cousins, and Gortat for George, Aldridge, and Hibbert. Good for me?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Jake VZ: Yeah I like this one, Aldridge > Cousins and I like HIbbert more than Gortat and it makes up the slight difference in Harden and George

  10. Giannis Alphabet says:
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    I’m cruising to the playoffs—-Giannis, Wroten, Mason Plumlee, or…..Kobe?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Giannis Alphabet: Wroten. Think he goes off late in the year

      • Lasandro says:
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        @JB Gilpin: You’ve been implying this for a couple of months now, but why do you think MCW is gonna get “shut down” only midway during the season? Dont you think the sixers would at least want him winning ROY as some kind of consolation for the fans? Interesting, is all. If he ever does get shut down, I know I’ll be running to the wire to grab me some Wroten

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @Lasandro: Well i’ve been saying at some point in the fantasy playoffs, which is still 5+ weeks down the road. So not right now or necessarily any time soon, but I do think it happens during the playoffs at some point

  11. Joe says:
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    My team: Lillard, IT2, Burke, Knight, J.Green, Deng, D.Lee, Sullinger, Gibson, Ibaka, M.Gasol

    His Team: CP3, Hill, Bledsoe, G.Green, Korver, Ariza, T.Jones, Thad Young, Favors, Vucevic, Gortat

    Should I make a trade for Korver, Ariza, or Thad Young? And, if so, who should I be willing to give up? I’m leaning Korver since he should be cheapest, and has a great playoff schedule, but I don’t know what a winning offer would be.

    Help JB-Wan!

    • Joe says:
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      @Joe:

      (Note: Redick is on waivers until tomorrow and I’m trying to add/drop Burke for him but I have a low waiver priority so I may not get him)

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Joe: Hmmm I’m not seeing anything I love. I’m not a big Thad guy, and Korver is fine but I really like your squad. I’d hold Burke too personally but I am still a sucker that he turns it around even if he sits a game or two.

  12. Jake Van Zuiden says:
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    Are you guys going to have a fantasy baseball league I could join this spring? My buddies are all bailing on me this year saying they don’t have time and whatnot. I’ve done it the past 3 years and love it

  13. miles proudfoot says:
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    Given the news about Sanders, I dropped DJ Aug for Henson. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to straight up lose him but my other options were TJones or Wilson Chandler. What do you think? I mostly win the cats for the week save FG and TO so thought it may make sense. 10 team 9 cat points league and I’ve got Westbrook and Kawhi coming back hopefully after the break so figured I could spare a guard to increase FG and solidify blocks. I think I just have to watch my 3’s now.

    • miles proudfoot says:
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      @miles proudfoot: also theoretically JV or Teague…nah. I think I’m just making myself nuts and should prob stop conducting so many tinker stinkers.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @miles proudfoot: Hmmm if it fits your needs I can’t fight it really. Even though I like DJ. Hah I think you’re good. Def keeping T Jones. Wilson as the drop is about the same but seems it fits more losing DJ. So looks good!

  14. Shoop Da Whoop says:
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    I hate Danny Green.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Shoop Da Whoop: Haha at least he got ya a block so far! :(

  15. mUshi says:
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    Wc duo is better, lebron/george or love/curry?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @mUshi: I’d take LeBron George side, like LeBron the best still and less injury risk

  16. TR says:
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    I don’t know if you’ll see this tonight, but what do you think about this trade:

    I give up Conley, Hibbert, and Pierce for Stephenson, Joe Johnson, and Wroten.

    I felt like the only real value I was giving up was Conley, who’s about matched by Stephenson, and then Johnson and Wroten seem to have more ROS upside than Hibbert & Pierce since they both have brittle point guards and their performance when those PG’s are hurt

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @TR: I’m here all night! Here-ish… haha. So I’m guessing by your analysis you are winning blocks most weeks? I’m still a little iffy on it, mostly because I hate Johnson. I’d much rather Hibbert there. I love love love Wroten to be a big pickup by the playoffs but I still think it’s giving up a tad too much

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