Man, at this rate Rudy Gobert might cost me a 2nd round pick!
“Rudy Gobert, the interior trance from France, the reason who is Parisian, the… the…” OK I’m out of boxer intro phrases. He’s just really redonk good, going 19/22/2/0/4, just one point from a Goro! And you can’t even say “just one more made FT” as he made all 3 of em! 8-11 FG, 3-3 FT, only one TO, and the Gobi desert has claimed the lives of another opposing frontline!
We all knew he’d be good, but I don’t think too many people thought he’d be this good. Of those waiver-wire-added big men that have found their way to fantasy glory this year, I think it’s easily becoming Gobert as the front runner in 2015-16 Fantasy drafts. You could say, he’s already working his way into my #1 sleeper glory hole. Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy basketball action:
The tennis balls are off the legs, the HurryCane back in the closet, the pre-game meal eaten at 5:00 AM at the early bird special – we’ve got Kemba Walker back!
After a month and a half off, Walker came off the bench last night for the Hornets, and looked like Louis C.K.’s nethers. Rusty. 2-9 from the field for 6/1/2/0/1 with a TO in 16 minutes. While there’s no need to be harsh – we expected some rust after knee surgery – but Mo Williams played pretty well with 8 dimes and Gerald Henderson shocked the world with a career-high 11 assists. Ok, “shocked the world” may be a slight overstatement, I could say “it was so shocking it blew all his hair off!” It’s certainly interesting he had a previous career-high 9 dimes just last Sunday, so now there’s two facilitators to battle with. Makes me worried about Kemba’s assists upside, and he’s kinda looking like an Isaiah Canaan clone. Wait, I said I didn’t need to be harsh! That said, Kemba is healthy and has a lot more upside, so obviously worth owning everywhere. I just wouldn’t be shocked (unlike Hendo’s dimebag!) if he’s towards the end of the line if you’re killing Pts/3s and need to stream a stat at the end of week one of the playoffs… Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy basketball action:
Well, yet another example of why a starting nod doesn’t equate to production, even for seemingly good players…
The Bulls got embarrassed last night in LA, with Nikola Mirotic getting the start at SF. It was disastrous before, and twas disastrous again! Only got 12 minutes and did nothing other than get a steal and a turnover, and it looks like old Tibs wasn’t too happy. The ghost of Carlos Boozer shoved Mirotic around on a layup and he just isn’t a good defender – why we saw another healthy dose of Tony Snell. Even in a 2OT game, Tibs didn’t let Mirotic off the bench! Went small instead with Kirk Hinrich and Aaron Brooks picking up more PT late and in the OTs. And ultimate insult to injury – the Bulls still lost. But it was really Derrick Rose‘s fault as he continues to lay brickhouses on top of batches and batches of turnovers. He’s like a Martha Stewart version of The Big Bad Wolf! And the Bulls should’ve pulled this one out since the Lakers continually refuse to play their best player… Tarik Black! Outrageous! Egregious! Opprobrious! (thank you Thesaurus) Black is an MVP waiting to happen… Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy basketball action:
Ya know, the Lakers deserved to lose like that last night. After building a solid lead against the Wizards, the Purp and Gold collapsed yet again… And they didn’t play my boy or fan-favorite Tarik Black! I find this an atrocity… Gonna be about 30 straight losses at this rate!
But as much as I want to rant about Black, that would be a pretty weak open… So the next best ranty Lakers subject has to be Wayne Ellington‘s crazy game, putting up a 28/3/3/3/0 line on 12-20 FG (3-9 3PTM 1-1 FT). Sell if you can! No Nick Young last night as he’s dealing with a minor ankle injury from practice on top of being in the doghouse. Swaggy Peed on the carpet! We all know Swaggy never touched a basketball he didn’t think he could shoot, and that will sap into Ellington’s future upside. I could see some interesting buzziness floating around Wayne given Kobe Bryant‘s shoulder fell off, so if any deeper league owners are interested and you can get a value, I’m down like Byron Scott a clown. That said, he’s out there in a ton of league fa free (9% owned last night when I grabbed him in an RCL), so maybe you get a couple hot games before you Sellington. Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:
I pretty much wanted to kill the open right there, but “journalistic integrity” or whatever… In a horrific shooting display, BJ flat out sucked for 5-18 shooting and it was equally as painful to watch as Josh Smith at shootaround. A few fadeaway treys, bricked layups… You name it. I honestly think a big part of the Pistons game plan right now is have BJ shoot like a hot dog, and rely on the O-boards from Andre Drummond and Greg Monroe. Drummo’s OREB gave me an O-face last night, that’s for sure! Racked up 7 OREB and Monroe had 5, and I’m guessing almost all of those came on BJ’s bricks. If terrible shots leading to OREB and putbacks counted as assists, Jennings would be John Stockton. Of course, sometimes there’s some Flubber on the ball and it goes in, but this is an immense sell-high window. Probably a Sportscenter Top-10 layup, and has been playing fairly well lately. Even D.J. Augustin at 8-18 FG 19/0/5 couldn’t get Stan Van to flip-flop PG down the stretch. We’re used to seeing flip-flops! Stan Van coaching like Laguna Beach. Jennings is a big name on the trading block as well, and the Pistons aren’t hesitant to give players away, as in cutting J Smoove. One rumor I read was Houston… They would be the worst shooting team in NBA history! Success for Houston would obviously be bringing in two guys from a former 5-23 team… Then again, the Pistons just won on the road in San Antonio for their 6th straight, and they are – you won’t believe this – now 3.5 games out of a playoff spot in the East. Hah! Trade or no trade, labradoodle-city Jennings could probably fetch an interesting ransom in the fantasy market as this current run is unsustainable. Here’s what else went down in last night’s two games:
After getting down as much as 23 points, I was going to pose the question – is Nicolas Batum the glue for the Blazers?
But then the Charlotte Hornets looked like the Kelly Tripucka Charlotte Hornets, hiked up their shorts, and got run out of Portland in the second half. This is Damian Lillard‘s show! 29/4/7/2/0 hitting 5 treys and 12 of 21 shots for The Omen.
With Batum out last night (and is hopeful to miss only two more and returning next Monday – he likes the weekly league fantasy players!), a lot of minutes opened up for Blazers SF. And of all the options, I don’t think anyone would’ve projected Allen Crabbe as the starter! Play Chris Kaman at the 3! I actually remember watching a few of Crabbe’s games at Cal when they were in the NCAA tourney and thought he was a good little player. But dude had 4 combined minutes on the season! And even the starting role did nothing for him, going 2/2/2/0/0 in 22 minutes shooting 1-4. Allen Crabby, want more rock! Crabbe has virtually no value, and Batum’s injury just means a few stats will trickle down through the Blazers starters and role players.
The under-the-radar winner is Steve Blake, who nearly rainbowed for 5/4/2/2/1. Season-high 25 minutes and he’s averaging over 3 dimes a game this year. Your line-up is probably filled out tomorrow and Saturday for the next two Blazers games, but hey, if you have one streaming spot open and need a little PG love, don’t be afraid to turn to grown-up Dewey for help. Here’s what else went down in fantasy hoops last night:
We all know the story. Cleveland fans burn things, then stage apology videos. Yeah, let’s put the ashes from last night’s barbecue and put it on top of my LeBron James Cavs jersey and pick it up. Sooooooooooo symbolic. Somebody is already halfway through the 30 for 30 special… But I got an advanced look at LeBron’s first press event with Cavs owner Dan Gilbert:
I love what Slim said in his reaction as a Heat fan. “LeBron’s legacy will now be that of a journeyman.” BURN! Poor choice of the all caps scathing word, JB! LeBron is still the alpha dog of the NBA, but he’s now numero tres in my ranking-os… Never was too good at Spanish. I’m moving Anthony Davis up to 2 and joining Slim’s bandwagon. Even though BronBron had talent around him in Miami, he never had a point guard. Which I mean more literally than not since Mario Chalmers‘ assists look more like Billy Dee Williams’ Dancing with the Stars‘ scores than an NBA PG’s! And now LeBron’s got family on his team! I don’t mean the city of Cleveland, but Uncle Drew! They should mish mash one of those videos with drunk uncle from SNL… Anyway, Kyrie Irving is going to have some balls in his hands (cough), so LeBron will be performing less hernia tests. Kyrie’s three-year arc has been declining FG% but steadily improving Ast/TO ratios and overall dimes. More efficient with the ball, but not hitting the shots. Maybe it’s because the Cavs had no other playmakers… Iso for Anderson Varejao! Dion Waiters just blocked me on Twitter. LeBron will be a huge ease on Kyrie’s defensive pressure, however stemming from that – if Kyrie is hot, he shootin’! Both will have great final numbers, but a little inconsistent game-to-game. LeBron should see his dimes go down a tick as well. Here’s a look at the rest of the free agency movement and some key notes from Summer League:
The injury bug hath claimed another victim, with LaMarcus Aldridge suffering a tough fall in San Antonio on his lower back/coccyx. What are you doing to us fantasy gods?! While reports right now is it was only a lower back contusion, you never want to hear “needed a wheelchair to get around the arena.” Unless you’re Professor X! Yikes. As Slim is putting out early this afternoon, the Blazers have a mammoth of a 5-week slate coming up in the second week of the playoffs. So if you’re an Aldridge owner, I would just thank my blessings, or count my lucky stars, or something like that, if L.A. can indeed give you all five of those. In the immediacy, Thomas Robinson looks like an interesting pickup for some flashy upside. “Oh camon JB, Thomas Robinson again!?” Yup! And I said it last time and he had a 14/18/2/0/2 in there! I serious doubt Aldridge will suit up again this week, giving T-Rob some serious run. We’ll obviously get some more detailed updates throughout the day, so sacrifice a shot of rum to Jobu, or rub your bunions against the carpet, whatever you do to appease the fantasy gods to get a healthy Aldridge back for the postseason. Here’s what else went down in fantasy action:
Ohhhhh, fringe-fantasy worthy Duke players… I’m not a fan! Belle Knox isn’t a fan! Is she fringe-fantasy worth? Plausibly. Whilst you search her in Incognito mode, Kyle Singer went all multi-cat in a near-rainbow explosion for 11/7/3/5/1. He even stole DeMarcus Cousins‘ parking spot! Fight, fight! While I’m not necessarily the biggest Singler fan (which I’m sure you can ascertain by the title and if you’ve read all year), he does have something going for him that all Lakers and Bucks would give their left nut for. Consistent minutes. After the All-Star break, Singler is averaging 34 minutes a game. And hey, he needs every single[r] one of them to stay fantasy relevant. Burn! But relevant indeed, as his slash in that time is 11.7/3.1/1.6/1.1/0.6. Not setting the world on fire, but for your fringe-guys – especially in weekly leagues – giving you a little of something is better than a lot of nothing. Award winning advice right there! Along with the multi-cat, is at 1.5 treys and 82% FT shooting since the break. Dibbling in this, dabbling in that, and next thing you know he’s someone you trust more than, I dunno, maybe even Brandon Jennings who couldn’t find the hole last night. “Tie in a joke from the beginning, tie in a joke from the beginning!” Shut up 13-year-old inner monologue! Here’s what else I saw in NBA action from last night:
And we’re back baby! The All-Star break in Nawleans has come and gone, with a disappointing dunk contest, no bounce passes in the skills contest (yeah, what was up with that Prez?!) and All-Star jerseys that made the finale look like an adult rec league game on a Thursday night. “Help, I think Stanley has a hernia!” I was constantly thinking to myself about the Major League quote, but the opposite. Brian Scalabrine or Matt Bonner coming into their first practice with sleeves and a hat on, and their coaches were like, “We don’t wear caps and sleeves at this level son!” Sure made that coach look stupid on Sunday night! And if you’re a Cleveland fan, you’ve got to be thinking, “Crikey wtf is going on!?” after seeing Kyrie Irving and Dion Waiters go off in their respective ASB games over the weekend. Then to see neither of them do anything against the 76ers last night! To be fair, the Cavs let their scrubs do all their damage in a blowout. So I guess if Cavs are thinking crikey, Philly fans are thinking, “if we don’t win 20 games this year, I’m giving up cheesesteaks!” Drastic? Probably. Be liking asking me to give up that delicious BBQ. Now I’m all sorts of hungry… How did this get into food? Let’s just dive right in to last night’s return to action, like how you’d dive into an all-you-can-eat Southern food buffet with mac & cheese, hush puppies, chopped BBQ, whole BBQ, biscuits & gravy, and then, and then…: