New this year to the basketball side of Razzball is updated tier rankings throughout the season. Every Wednesday morning I’ll update my tiers on a rotating basis for guards, forwards, and centers (i.e. Guards this week, Forwards next week, etc.) The first run through of tiered rankings may not differ much from my original rankings because there haven’t been many games played. Don’t like it? Well there will be no vote on this since this is a dictatorship. However, you can destroy me in the comments as much as you please. I’ll also go through a recap of the previous night’s games as well since there are only a couple games on Tuesday nights. Here’s what happened in the NBA last night…
Kyle Lowry – 2/1/4/1/1 going 1 for 4 from the field. I should mention that he only played 17 minutes because he sprained his ankle (day to day). Injuries stink. Like “don’t go in the bathroom after your Dad on after Taco Bell” stink.
Jonas Valanciunas – During the game, Kendrick Perkins kept asking Jonas when he and his brothers are releasing a new album. Val, having been teased frequently about this, decided to torch Perkins for 18 points, 6 boards, 1 assist while going 6-6 from the line. If he can channel this anger every night like Gordon from dodgeball, I might start recommending him.
Hasheem Thabeet – I just threw up a little. He played 23 minutes and somehow scored 10 points while racking up 5 boards and 2 blocks. I can’t believe I’m writing about him. I just threw up again.
Nikola Vucevic – Back to back double doubles while averaging 39.5 minutes in those two games. Love the potential and I hope I don’t confuse him with Nikola Pekovic at some point. Actually, I think Orlando should trade him to Minnesota so they can build the foundation for their
all Russian all-white Montenegrin + Russian conglomerate team. Yes, Andrei Kirilenko and Alexey Shved are also on that T-Wolves team.
Kirk Robinson – A studly performance last night with 19 points, 7 rebounds, 11 assists, 3 steals, and two 3PM. Oh, you can’t combine point guards? Shit. Kirk Hinrich and Nate Robinson essentially split the stats (and the minutes) which will lead to erratic results. Hurry back Derrick Rose.
Greg Monroe – 27 points, 10 boards, 2 assists, 1 steal, and 3 blocks while going 10-20 from the field (7-7 FT). On behalf of all owners that drafted you… thank you for finally showing up for the season.
Rodney Stuckey – After you dropped him, Stuckey went off for 17 points, 4 boards, 4 assists, and 1 block while nailing two 3’s. He can’t wait to see the disappointment on your face when you start him next game.
JaVale McGee – Has come off the bench while averaging 17.3 minutes per game behind Kosta Koufos (14/5/0/0/3). Until Coach Karl shows some more faith in him, it will be hard to count on lines like tonight (16/3/1/0/3). I hear he tells great jokes while on the bench though.
Wilson Chandler – Averaging 19.5 minutes this season, I’m beginning to think that Chandler will brush up on his Chinese again. As for fantasy owners… 5 points, 7 rebounds, and a single 3PM will make you want to deport him yourself.
Now for the tiers (Guards):
Top 3 overall, idiot: Chris Paul
The Kobe Bryant Tier: Kobe Bryant