Razzball Nation! We’re here on a special weekend wrap-up where Slim (this is JB speaking) got to the action and JB just snuck in the beginning. And snuck in the end! I’m like Brad Pitt at the Oscars. ”Wait, why is he winning best picture! So confused right now…” Tomorrow I’ll proudly illustrate what I did over the weekend, but a nice defining touch hoops-wise was another great one from my boy Mike Scott, who while posting great lines, isn’t helping the Hawks win… And that’s a problem! Especially with Paul Millsap assumedly back sometime soon this week. But I thought Gravity mighta gotten best picture too! After a really rough send-off last Monday, went bonkers on the Suns for 20/5/2/3/0 with three treys and not a single TO. I bet Philly sports fans wish they had no TO. BOOM! Double sports joke. The main number that got my emoji tats all excited was the 40 mins played. Millsap is going to travel with the Hawks as they migrate on a 5-game road trip, but very easily could miss the first few making Scott a solid short-term add. So beam him aboard, win a big week as we near playoff time, and don’t forget to yell over the music if those pompous mf#@*$ng PA guys at the Oscars wanna condescend you by playing the music. And here’s Slim with what he saw over the weekend:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oh man, a busy day yesterday in hoops! The obvious first mention is GO HEELS! Oh man, I feel like storming the court today. I think Chapel Hill fans everywhere this morning should storm their office/classroom/crowded area in a flash mob at some point. Then we have LeBron James getting his nose broken by Serge A Broke-a! The mayor of Cleveland has already issued Serge Ibaka a key to the city. Fine LeBron $5,000 for flopping! Man, the next round of internet videos of “LeBroning” are going to be a lot more like “The Knockout Game”. Seriously, even LeBron haters have to love he got it broke a step or two out before throwing it down. Word still to come if the nose is indeed broken, but my money is on yes. Regardless, we’ve seen a few players come back from a broken nose in the same game donning the Hannibal mask, so I doubt he misses any time after passing concussion tests last night. MaskBron! And then we had the trade deadline come and go, with nothing too major albeit a few surprises. I’m starting a bit off the reservation with a guy I’m going to pump hard and is a pickup now in 12-teamers. Lord Byron Mullens! After trading their former starting 5 which we’ll get in below, it’s Mullens and Arnett Moultrie manning down the C fort in the abandon ship Sixers front line, with Mullens picked up for draft picks. I know Mullens is boring, but he was usable while with the Bobcats posting a 10.6/6.4/1.5/0.6/0.6 line with 1.2 treys in 27 minutes a game in 12-13. His sub-40 FG% blew, sure, but he’s a perimeter shooter who can play decent D so I think he will get run. He’s a lot better than Moultire in my opinion and I think will get big minutes. And I don’t know why, maybe it’s because he looks so goofy or maybe because he’s been in the league 5 years, but Mullens is actually only 25 when I thought he might be 30. For a team tanking, he’s a perfect acquisition to help rack up points to try and fill maybe 2 more seats a night in Philly. ”Thanks for coming Mr. and Mrs. Mullens!” Here’s what else went down yesterday, starting with NBA deadline deals:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Last night was a doozy. Flummoxing. I actually had to look up flummoxing to be sure it worked. And it does! But there are numerous things that aren’t working for the Kings, mainly Rudy Gay‘s Achilles and DeMarcus Cousins‘ ankle. Gay actually wasn’t “Leon” down in pain like DeMarcus after DMC fully rolled his ankle, but neither sounds like any sort of fun. With Cousins, the diagnosis is a “moderate sprain” and I gotta say, a big near 300-pounder putting all his weight on an ankle the turns 90 degrees the wrong way doesn’t sound moderate. Moderate maybe in the sense that the dude in 127 hours only had to “moderately” scratch his arm to get free! I’d expect at least a few weeks. But, “I’m not a doctor, I’m a pool man!” Then there’s Gay’s Achilles which you could see in his face he was in bad pain and exited pretty quick, albeit under his own power. We all saw Kobe Bryant limp off under his own power with the torn Achilles, so this one is definitely a hold-your-breath injury. The obvious immediate add in most formats is Derrick Williams, who I kinda disregarded when he was acquired, but now is in a “you-better-be-able-to-score-a-lot-because-we’ll-need-it” starting role. Solid 22/11/1 with three treys last night in 40 minutes of duty. Just added him in one league for the ice cold Terrence Ross for example. Ross is like, “hey don’t blame me, it’s this effin’ weather!” Yes – I narrate my fantasy teams. Someday soon I hope to put on a finger puppet show. Here’s what else I saw last night in a wild evening of fantasy action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dude, I had the title “Breaking News – Nets File Paperwork To Relocate To London” all ready to go for a Nets open, then saw everyone was saying that… #Groupthink! So let’s all sit back and marvel at what Lance Stephenson did last night. The 28/4/4/1/0 line was not his best line on the year, the %s (10-17 FG 3-7 3PTM 5-5 FT) were awesome, sure, but I think he did something ridiculous that was off the stat line. He looked like the best player on the floor. Just look at some of these sick dimes! But you do have to question why he fell over on that second one… Haha… Maybe made them look better than they actually were by flopping around like a fish out of water… Anywho, Stephenson had some concerns with two bad games right when Danny Granger was back, but has quickly quelled those question marks and back on track. With Stephenson cemented, I think it’s time to lose George Hill in virtually all formats if you haven’t already. Breaking news – I know – and we’ve talked about it a few times in the comments, but his shocking 81% -ownership in Yahoo combined with last night’s 3/3/5 game (marks his highest assist total since December 20th) – it’s just not happening. In fact, if you told me heading into the year Stephenson (5.2) would be averaging two more assists a game than Hill (3.3), I might’ve spontaneously combusted. But hey, it’s working for the Pacers and if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Unless of course you’re in first place in a 10 or 12-team league and still own Hill… You can fix that! Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
If you have been stashing (or if you’re Grey, staching) Marc Gasol on your roster, you were feeling some Good Vibrations last night! Less because of the production, but more with the early arrival and fantasy goodness. And that good-ol Gasol Wildside. Now, I may be too young to remember Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch, but I am old enough to [barely] remember when Gasol went down that I said he was a hold in all formats. You may be saying “no duh!”, but he was dropped in several shallower leagues by those darned knee-jerkers. But as we talked about in the comments earlier this week, I see Gasol getting eased in and a tad rusty the first few games, but then back to a beast. 3-7 for 12/4/1 and 6-8 at the stripe last night. You’ll take that from a guy you’ve stashed! The Thunder tried to rough him up and it didn’t work. Only 24:12 on the court, but the one assist he had was vintage Gasol and should leave you feeling dandy from this point on. And props to Prodders for breaking the news and hopefully you got him in your line-up. Our comments save lives! New Razzball bumper sticker. Here’s what else I saw last night in Fantasy Hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
You know, Raymond Felton broke his hand last year, and this is no joke, less than two weeks after Twinkies were officially discontinued. I imagine him hearing the news after a Knicks loss, and punching the glass out at a NYC convenience store. ”How will I ever carboload before rolling onto the court!” Then Twinkies, after being bought out and licensed, again appeared on store shelves in July 2013. And ohhhh boy, was it an offseason to remember for Roly Poly Felton! Even though he’s always looked like a big boy, concerns about his weight surfaced yet again, and this year his stats were down before a myriad of injuries took their toll. This past groin injury, where Felton reportedly heard a “pop”, finally got him to listen to the advice of the trainers. ”When my little guy down there told me something was wrong, I finally listened.” Knicks head athletic trainer Roger Hinds had to think on the fly, eventually settling on a 12-grain/cashew cream vegan Twinkie-substitute. Instead of the 15-17 off-the-shelf Twinkies comprising the majority of Felton’s daily diet, he was down to 12-14 “healthy-makers” (as he called them) while rehabbing his groin injury. ”The first three or four were kinda funky, but then you get that urge for more-and-more just like the old ones.” After losing 34 pounds in 72 hours, Felton was ready to rejoin the team in practice. ”I felt great out there, mobile, my arms stopped running into my love handles when I was drivin’ to the hoop.” Another 42 pounds came off in the next week, and he was ready to play last night. And man, did those 76 lost pounds come in handy! 13/5/14/1/0 against the Heat in a surprise win. I caught up with him after the game: “No J.R. Smiff in the game helped me keep the rock and everything runnin’ through me. He can untie e’rybody’s shoelaces all I care!” Back to reality, I did watch this game, and the bulk of those assists came on dishes to Carmelo Anthony burying jumpers, so the assist total is obviously a big outlier. But Felton did look good. Made good moves, looked agile, and more importantly, made the Knicks look better while playing 39 minutes. We can have fun all we want, but I think I was wrong to be a little dismissive on him returning. I like him right now over D.J. Augustin and Kendall Marshall for example. More staying power, and while the most injury prone of the bunch, I think helps you more in the long-haul. Must-own in 12-teamers, depends on need and depth in 10ers. Here’s what else I saw last night:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Ohhhh man, the mile run. Nothing establishes popularity in middle school more than the mile run. You have the athletes who can just jog but have to semi-try, the dorks who are OK at sports that do pretty well (me!), the cool kids that just walk, the unhealthy people who saunter, and then the coolest dudes who hide behind the scoreboard on the other side of the track as the teachers and smoke cigs. True story! But the real run to talk about this morning is C.J. Miles‘ run, who’s capped off three straight great games. Hit a ridiculous 10 treys last night, for a 34/5/2/2 line shooting 11-18 and 10-14 from deep. If only someone called it yesterday! And proof to the theory of ThrAGNOF. Got you 10 treys for just one spot start. Great night for Miles and shows us yet again that if you need to stream guys, play anyone facing the Sixers. As I mentioned yesterday, their D is league worst in points allowed by nearly 7 points more a game given up than the second-worst. It’s a fast-paced team with bad D no matter how you slice it. Unfortunately for Miles, the acquisition of Luol Deng is really going to hurt his minutes, making him a guy you’re probably not picking up in standard leagues or solid 12-teamers. Just won’t have the minutes or upside. But luckily he had one last game to show his range and should stay in the mix for deeper leaguers. Here’s what else I saw last night in a big slate of games:Please, blog, may I have some more?
PGs depth suddenly overfloweth from the wire, with a lot of guys on their choppers… chopping(?) their way onto fantasy squads. Listen, I would make some sort of better parallel with that show, but I haven’t gotten to it yet. Takes a lot of effort to plow through a show! I friggin’ had to stop the new Arrested Development in season 4. Yikes. And speaking of arrested development, the Clips sure got a buster when Chris Paul went down with a separated shoulder Friday night, and through a series of updates will be out “up to six weeks.” The trainer asked Paul if he was filing for divorce with his shoulder, but nah, just separated. Huge blow to the Clippers, but it was a “rush to your nearest internet device” moment for fantasy owners to add Darren Collison. On Friday night, in JB’s RCL 2 I missed out, then when deciding who to drop for him in RCL 1, I missed him by about 10 seconds. Thank’s a lot Your Mom Says Hi! A Hill ‘O Beans bout to be refried! Yeah, terrible smack talk, I know… If you’re not checking out the comments every night, all sorts of updates get fantasy spins throughout the evening, like El Burro breaking the news while watching his Clips’ title hopes get separated. I like Collison a lot, and unless you singularly need assists, I like him over the other big breakout PG from the weekend. I think he gives you 16/3/6/2 a game until Paul is done with marriage counseling. The 35 minutes he’ll play a night should make those numbers pretty realistic. Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in hoops action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Man! I was loving that game! Through three contests (the inaugural one in the comments then when adopted into the piece), I didn’t get a single win! For shame… At least now with Kobe Bryant missing 6 weeks, we’ll be brimming with excitement to relaunch the game! I never ended up with Kobe anywhere, so I’m downplaying the real fantasy impact here… Kobe owners are asking should I hold or should I let go? I think he is probably a hold in almost all leagues if you can, but man, these top-end injuries are killin’ out there! Plus we have to remember it’s a fractured knee and a re-sewn up Achilles. And he wasn’t setting the world on fire anyway. Kobe is turning into Jeter from last year! Bryant is a medical marvel though, he can jump over cars going 40 MPH and come back after bone spurs a game later. So he’s worth the stash unless it’s a very shallow 10-teamer or smaller, or you’re just a triage of injuries. Here’s what else went down last night across fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Have you ever gone out with a nurse, or someone in pre-med? It sounds all sexy, and I’m not gonna lie, it was, but like in all things, there are benefits, and there are drawbacks. In my case, it was a textbook situation of a little knowledge being a dangerous thing. If I had a cough – it’s malaria. Once I had an itch on my back – don’t wanna scare you, but you may have cancer. My sac a little tingly – you got the AIDS. Humph. She was wrong on almost all of those prognostications. But I can relate, because I fancy myself a bit of a B-Ball aficionado, and, really, I just read and watch a lot of the game. So when I nabbed Kobe Bryant in the 5th round in 2 leagues, I smugly patted myself on the back, letting the league know I got the steal of the draft. Mamba was gonna came back right at the beginning of the season, all pissed off, and be a ball hoggin’ menace out there. Then I got either Sanders, or Tobias, as well as Wilson Chandler, and held them on the bench also. I thought that I could outsmart the system, and it hasn’t exactly worked out that way. But I’m still hoping that Kobe can come in this Sunday, and totally redeem me. But this isn’t my diary, so let’s get to it.
So, knowledge is dangerous, potentially, I believe I have established that. If you think you can handle the danger, then read on, brave reader, read on:Please, blog, may I have some more?