Geez, open the triage, we might not have any beds open in our Fantasy Basketball Infirmary after this weekend!  Way to sully the excitement of players debuting on new teams…

I guess an injury that made a lot of people surly is a year with no more Sully.  Stress reactions have been claiming lots of games lately, and Jared Sullinger will be shut down for the year with lingering issues in his foot.  I blame Brad Stevens!  Gives me stress reactions…

The Celtics have been anything but consistent with rotations, but Kelly Olynyk should be primed for a little consistency whence he’s back from his kankle.  Right now it’s Tyler Zeller manning the 5 with Brandon Bass at the 4, and those three should split most of the big man minutes.  Zeller’s nice %s with the big man stats can be usable on a lot of teams and Bass, who went 15/5/1/0/2 on 7-11 FG in 40 minutes last night always seems to be underrated.  Olynyk of Nazareth is the guy to own, but he’s not miles ahead of the other two.  I wouldn’t mind a spec add for any of the bunch, but not dropping anyone of too much value.  Here’s what else went down over an injury-plagued weekend of fantasy basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m not what you would profile as a “PC”, “everyone gets a trophy” type. I’m not a raging “right winger” either, but the “politically correct” epidemic is taking over, and I’m not going to stand for it any longer. Besides, I much prefer “sitting down”. But the “all star” “process” has gotten a little too “concerned” with “inclusiveness”. I believe that you can feel my sarcasm at this point, so to further the snarky quotations would just be douchey of me. And speaking of douchey, the NBA has changed the all star weekend to the point where it’s too silly. I propose the following rule changes be reverted to their original order:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Contrary to what JB has written, we Canadians watch the Superbowl. We love it, and we do everything you do: prop bets, stupid gorging on simple foods, excessive drinking, the whole nine yards (which, ironically, is all you need to get a first down in the Canadian Football League). Even if we were luke warm on the game up here, no other sporting event will go up against it, so unless you wanna watch reruns of the World Poker Tournament, you’re dialed in to the Superbowl. So I saw what you saw. And what can we take away from Sunday’s big game, hmmmm? The KISS principle, which is: Keep It Simple, Stupid! It works in virtually every facet of one’s life, but in relation to fantasy basketball, it means don’t get all “Inception” in your approach to a trade, or acquisition, or conversely, don’t overvalue, or hold a cat too long because of what you think will happen 6 weeks form now, you dig?  There are some running principles we need to adhere to to have the best chance of success, and the main one I focus on in this here article is Buy Low, Sell High.  BLSH. I’m going to try and get that one to catch on. So, with out further ado, BLSHers, lets take a look at who we can BLSH:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

After a tough groin injury, we really weren’t sure how long DeMar DeRozan would be Frozen.  “Let it go!  Let it go!  Blah dee, blah dee, blah…”  Trying to reach out to our younger readers.

DD is back and immediately entices with immense cleavage!  Younger readers, alienated.  DeRozan returned after missing a month and a half/21 games for a very solid 20/4/4/1/1 game hitting 9-14 FG.  It was against the soon to be relegated Sixers, so there’s that, but this is mighty encouraging.  In a game where Toronto didn’t need him at all, he started, got 29 minutes, and looks healthy for the stretch run.  Toronto letting the DD out!  I bet chicks aren’t letting the DD out this time of year in Canada, sheesh it’s cold in NC!  Lots of ripples with DeRozan back out there.  The biggest is it looks like James Johnson can go in several leagues, as sad an epitaph as it is…  Played only 15 minutes for 5/2/2/0/0.  Some of that was probably matchup based since the Sixers backup depth is in guards (and Amir Johnson played well), but it’s a swift death.  Terrence Ross also played only 18 minutes as the starter and scored 2 Pts without doing anything else.  Ross is barely 16-teamer worthy now, as one of the deepest lineups in the NBA is healthy top to bottom.  The Raptors bench could probably contend for a playoff spot in the East.  Well they’d have to replace Tyler Hansbrough.  I think one of those inflatable flailing arms things has more ball skills than Psycho T…  Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Awwwwww, yeah!  Yeah J-Val.  Gimme a little peek.  Gimme a little glimmer of hope!

Oh man, was it a tale of two halves for the Raptors last night!  They were lobbin’ shizz all over the place like they were the Globetrotters against the…  Who do they play again?  That they always beat?  Oh yeah, the Knicks, like they were the Globetrotters against the Knicks.  Kyle Lowry had 9 dimes in the first quarter and Jonas Valanciunas put up 14 points on 7-8 shooting.  Drummo playing uggo!  Kinda a “but his D” lately…  The Luminescent Lithuanian ended up going 14-15 for 31/12/0/0/1.  The FT% is nice (3-4 last night and right at 80% on the year), but his combined – yes COMBINED – Ast/Stl/Blk this year are under 2.  Sigh.  I thought he could turn into something so much more special!  There are some long-term nice things – per-36s he’s cut down a few TO, scoring more, fouls are down – but Casey is playing him lower minutes than last year (and wouldn’t consistently feed him after that hot start) and I don’t know if he’s ever going to be more than a slightly taller Zach Randolph.  And with that, J-Val is all insulted, buttoning up his clothes, and not giving me that flash of hope.  Dammit, I’m my own cockblocker!  Me n Valaciunas are gonna be awkward for a while until safely in the friendzone.  Here’s what else went down on a light night of Monday action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Looks like we are in full trade mode in the NBA.  Teams trying to get better for the playoff push.  Then we have teams dumping salary and getting much needed draft picks.  How does this relate to the daily game you say?  If NBA teams are in the advanced stage of trade talks the players involved in the deal can not play that night.  So if players that are involved in trade talks do not play them.  Go a different route.  As far as the article goes, I am going to tell you when the article does good and last week wasn’t one of my better efforts.  We had players sitting out for injuries, bereavement issues, and I just flat out missed on some guys.  This is a new week so lets kick some ass and make money playing some DFS hoops.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Tank city b##ch, tank tank city b##ch!  And that word edited is “beach”, because when I go to the city beach I like to see tank tops!

Ummmm, last night happened.  We’ve seen B units play big runs multiple times through the years, but I don’t know if there’s ever been a dichotomy of a team’s starters all being utterly unusable, and everyone on the second unit having fantasy-worthy games.  The world is upside down!  Then again, this is The Poppycockers we’re talking about, and they were down more points than the Dow Jones on Black Thursday.  The biggest beneficiary was Langston Hughes, I mean, Langston Galloway, who in his second NBA game after a D-League promotion went 19/4/3/1/0 hitting 6-10 FG and 3-4 3PTM.  Easy nickname bequeathed!  Galloway is now “The Harlem Renaissance”.  We gettin’ classy with these history references lately, yo!  With Jose Calderon a steaming pile of hot garbage (0/4/4/0/0 on 0-5 FG and 2 TO in 21 minutes – been saying he’s untouchable for weeks!), there’s no reason for the tankers to wreck their ship and straight Exxon-Valdez and pollute the waters.  “I can’t fly if my wings are melted off!”, Derek Fisher complained to Phil Jackson.  “Suck it up!”  Calderon is an easy asset to trade in real-life terms given a short contract shelf-life and the vet leadership (I’d hope) to be a backup.  If desperate for points, treys and steals, I could even see nabbing Galloway as a spec 14er add.  Plus you get style points like this!  Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I hope everyone in Razzball Nation had a fantastic Christmas!  Hopefully Santa brought you many-a-counting-stats presents and stuffed your stocking with the same vigor as John Henson.

So I’m not too big into that Facebook thing, but a lot of the fam seemed to mention their “Year in Review” and the weird shizz it pulled in over the Holidays.  Mine was two pictures other people put up and tagged me in, with a message reading “you have no life!”  But if the magical minions put together a Razzball Year in Review, it would be peppered with more #OccupyDraymondGreen than you could throw a stick at!  It’s hard to believe that the #OccupyDraymondGreen movement started on February 13th this year, and he was at 0% owned only a few games before the name was bequeathed.  The #Occupy culture became a viral movement here at Razzball, with only us alternative lifestyle hipsters ranking him top-100 coming into the season.  Boo-yah!  Season made right there, screw any of that Victor Oladipo nonsense…  While I had little-to-no concern David Lee would sap anything from the #Occupiers, Draymond Green had a coincidental teeny-tiny lull before some unreal rainbows on Christmas and last Saturday, going 10/10/3/2/2 on JC’s Bday and the biggie 4/8/6/6/3 against the Wolves in 32 scrappy minutes.  Late entry to that comment!  As we head into 2015, be sure to reflect on the highs-and-lows and whenever possible – #OccupyDraymondGreen!  Here’s what else Santa has brought to us fantasy owners since Christmas:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Tracking Rudy Gobert‘s path to the NBA has been movie worthy.  After an accident at his former job at the local steel mill, Rudy had Jon Favreau (he really could be French!) keep his grades up in exchange for Rudy helping Jonny out with the ladies.  Gobert almost gave up on his dream for basketball, but Charles S. Dutton gave a heartfelt speech on BEING REAL!  Utah fans tried carrying Gobert off the court chanting “Rudy!  Rudy!” after that win against the Spurs last Tuesday, but it was a big hazard to the overhead lights.

Derrick Favors‘ ankle turned into a kankle over the weekend, but luckily X-rays were negative and he’s day-to-day.  No reason for the lowly Jazz to throw him out there gimpy.  Monsieur Elbow time!  Filling in for Favors on Friday night, Rudy had one of the best games of his young career for 9/11/4/1/5 shooting 2-2 FG and 5-6 FT.  Followed it up with a start last night next to Enes Kanter for 7/9/0/2/3 in 31 minutes.  Playing with the big boys!  A wingspan that would make a pterodactyl jealous, Gobert should murder blocks for you if you’re able to stream him through the couple starts he’s likely to get this week.  No timetable for Favors, but big men + kankles = John Goodman.  I mean, not good for a speedy return.

Boy did the Fantasy God of Injuries not get enough human sacrifices over the weekend!  This might turn out to be the most depressing NBA recap I’ve ever written.   Stay positive JB!  Stay positive JB!  Thanks inner monologue…  Any other advice to help me get through today’s news?  Well, remember when in Interstellar it looked like there was no hope due to another Dust Bowl, then he just finds the newly incarnated NASA – – Wait, how does any of that make sense, they didn’t know he was alive yet he was their best hope!?  And then there’s that giant plot hole with the planet with the – – it just makes no – – uhughuhguhguhguhgug – – – - F, now my inner monologue is injured…  Here’s how the weekend of death went down in NBA action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“Who wants to win part of $45K for only $2 to play?!”

Yes, it’s Friday which means it’s DratKings night!  And I’m hopping in one of my low-risk, high-reward contests where I can win it big if I smoke da rest like a cig.  OK, I’m done with this bit, it’s just terrible isn’t it?!  I’ll be hopping in the NBA $45K LAYUP, with the $2 buy-in good enough to win me $5,000 if I can top the field.  Of course, all you have to do is finish in the top 20% to money, something Slim and I both did last week to double and triple up.  Slim did better!  Flaunting his $6 around like a Little Rascal.  Why daily fantasy is fun with your friends – instant gratification.  So hop in the contest tonight, follow our entries (“jbrazzball” & “SlimRazzball”), and let’s get Razzball Nation winnin’ some paper!  Here’s a look at five of my DK picks for tonight:

Please, blog, may I have some more?