I used to smoke plenty of trees back in the day. Now, no more smoking at all, as I’m trying to be healthier, but I will still partake in the gummy treats. Regardless of the delivey method, the THC (tetrahydrocannobinol) still gets me nice and toasty, which is what the experience of owning and watching Tobias Harris play this season has been. Last night….


For the season, Harris is a top 25 player. Is he a superstar? That’s debatable, as he doesn’t contribute much in the D cats and the usage is only 25. Most of the superstars have usage rates in the 30s. With that said, he provides 20+ points, 2 tres, 7 boards, and 4 dimes with good percentages. He also hasn’t missed a game this year, despite being banged up. The prior two years, Harris played 80 and 82 games. There’s value in that, as one cannot accumulate fantasy points if one is not on the court. Anyways, Harris is an UFA after this season and will get paid. He’s also only 26 years old, entering the prime of his career, so there’s a chance that he can continue improving. That would make all his owners nice and toasty indeed.

UPDATE: Harris, along with Boban Marjanovic, and Mike Scott were traded to PHI for Landry Shamet, Wilson Chandler, Mike Muscala, 2020 1st, 2021 1st via MIA (unprotected), 2021 2nd, and 2023 2nd.

All hail The Logo.

That PHI starting lineup looks kind of diesel as well, though.

Here’s what else I saw last night:


Reggie Bullock was traded to the Lakers for Svi Mykhailuk and a draft pick. I’m sad because I liked Svi and won’t be able to yell, “Svi for 3!” Anyways, Bullock is a career 39% shooter from downtown, so he provides much needed shooting for the Lakers. In addition, he’s an expiring contract so he won’t bog down any forays over the summer. Where Bullock fits in remains a question, but there’s a chance the Lakers trade their whole team for Anthony Davis, which would open up playing time for Bullock.

Blake Griffin


There’s a lot to like a_out _lake. He averages 26 points, 2.5 tres. 8 _oards, and 6 dimes. _ut, he turns the _all over 4 times a game and doesn’t provide D stats. Yo, B. Where did all the B’s go? _lake has 22 blocks on the season. 22! Damian Lillard has 25 and even Andrew Wiggins has 26.

Andre Drummond


Maybe we should legally his name to B’Andre. Top 10 player over the past six games.

Reggie Jackson


Reggie Bullock


A glitch in the Matrix.

Dennis Smith Jr.


Played a whopping 40 minutes. Only two other players scored in double figures and attempted more than 10 shots. DSJ had a usage rate of 33. Maybe my Stevie Franchise comps will come to fruition, from blunt force volume.

Mitchell Robinson


Played 24 minutes off the bench, while DeAndre Jordan played 24 minutes. I’ve been hearing some things that the Knicks could keep Jordan because he’s good friends with Kevin Durant. Hmmm, I thought he was a lock to get bought out. Regardless, both Luke Kornet and Enes Kanter DNP-CD, so Robinson’s value looks to be trending up, with the potential to zoom through the stratosphere if Jordan is moved.

Aaron Gordon


I used to date this girl that was hot. Unfortunatley, she had a cackle more wicked than Grey, which would make me cringe. But I’d keep going back because? Well, she was hot. That’s Gordon in a nutshell. He has all the physical tools to be a force, but he rarely is on a nightly basis. Yet, we keep going back because he delivers one of these performances every once in a while to keep us woke.

Evan Fournier


Fournier has scored at least 20 points just 10 times this season. He’s been brutal this season, as both the efficiency and usage are down from last season. On the positive side, he does play a ton of minutes and jacks up over 12 shots per game.

Terrence Ross


The range is wide with Ross, as he’s swung between top 25 and top 100 all season. Ross is the hired gun off the bench, as he garners a 24+ usage rate and hoists up close to 15 shots per game. He’s been rumored to be on the block, so keep an eye where he lands.

Paul George


Have they started playing his highlights on Pornhub.com yet?

Russell Westbrook


Another day. Another trip-dub. That makes seven in a row, which puts him two behind Wilt Chamberlain. I think the odds of Russ getting to 10 are about as good as a Democrat becoming the next POTUS.

Dennis Schroder


Played 23 minutes off the bench. Over the past six games, Schroder has been a top 60 player, despite averaging 25 minutes a game. Points, tres, dimes, and a pinch of steals are what he provides.

Andrew Wiggins


Yup. Led the team in shot attempts. Again. Yup. Timberwolves lost 106-108 to the undermanned Grizzlies. Yup. I get so tilted every MIN game, and I’m a Lakers fan.

Karl-Anthony Towns


MEOW! KAT has been the #5 player over the past six games. For the season, he’s on pace to be a member of the 1/1/1 club.

Jerryd Bayless


No Jeff Teague, Tyus Jones, or Derrick Rose again so Bayless got another start and played 37 minutes. The efficiency has been impressively bad (38% the past six games and 34% on the season), but dimes, tres, and boards have been plentiful. When any of the above three mentioned return, Bayless should slide back into oblivion.

Dario Saric


Mario with the D played 33 minutes off the bench. Taj Gibson only played 13 minutes, so maybe a changing of the guard could be in store.

Luol Deng


Played 22 minutes. LuOL! Deng! He’s actually scored double figures in three of the last four games. LuOL!!

Ivan Rabb


Got the start and played 33 minutes because Marc Gasol (trade possibility) was out. In addition, Joakim Noah (heel) and JaMychal Green (knee) did not play as well. If Gasol does get moved, Rabb should see a significant increase in minutes. He won’t drain any tres, but dub-dubs with D stats are on the menu.

Jaren Jackson Jr.


Did not foul out!!! That’s the key with JJJ, as he leads the NBA in fouls with 204 on the season. If he can stay on the court, he’s going to ball out.

Justin Holiday


Played a team-high 39 minutes. Memphis is taking the, “We traded for him so we better use him” a little too far, no? He’s been averaging close to 35 minutes a game, so he will trip into some peripheral stats. With that said, the efficiency is terrible (37%) but he will provide some tres.

Mike Conley


Top 10 player over the past seven games. So solid and underrated in fantasy. I’m glad that he looks to be healthy once again. Will he stay or will he go? That is the only question.

Kawhi Leonard


A poor shooting game from Kawhi, yet the Raptors defeated the 76ers in Philly, 119-107.

Serge Ibaka


No Iblocka, but another dub-dub, which makes seven straight games. Ibaka has consistently been a top 60-ish player all season.

Joel Embiid


Played 42 minutes. Over the past five games, Embiid has been shooting poorly (42%) and turning the ball over a ton (5 per game), yet he’s still a top 20 player  because he’s scoring over 30 points, draining 1.4 tres, grabbing 16 boards, dishing out 3.6 dimes, stealing 0.8, and blocking 1.8 shots per game. I noticed something strange recently, as the “Who gonna sex Embiid line” has been non-existent. When I inquired to his people, they answered that Embiid has embraced technology and given everyone a buzzer, like the ones you receive when ordering food at the mall.

Ben Simmons


Played a team-high 44 minutes. An encouraging sign of late has been the free throw shooting, as he’s been converting 71% on 5.8 attempts over the past six games.

Jayson Tatum


With Kyrie Irving (hip) out, Tatum led the Celtics in minutes played (34). Channing was sitting at home, stuffing his face with Bom Boms and nodding up and down, as he was happy to see the family name getting an elevated spike in Google clicks.

Terry Rozier


Got the start for Kyrie and played 32 minutes. That’s why he’s a backup.

Jaylen Brown


Moved into the starting lineup because Marcus Morris was out and played 29 minutes. Brown led the team in shot attempts, but wasn’t particularly efficient. I have to give him his due, though, as he had been shooting 49% from the field over the prior seven games.

Gordon Hayward


Played 31 minutes off the bench. It seems like Hayward plays better when Kyrie is out. Checks the numbers. Nope. While the usage rate is up when Kyrie is off the court, the production for Hayward is better with Kyrie. Numbers don’t lie. Neither do hips. Shakira sang it and countless coaches, regardless of the sport, preach the same thing.

Collin Sexton


Played a team-high 42 minutes. Sexton sucks. There’s so many ways we could go with that, but this is a respectamable family website. Sexton can provide points and tres, but that’s about it. He shoots inefficiently from the field, but he’s getting a ton of run and will likely continue to, as the Cavs suck. A lot of sucking for one blurb.

Alec Burks


Burks has been solid, producing top 100 value the past couple of weeks. Getting a ton of minutes and providing points, tres, boards, and dimes. He’s a trade candidate, though, which would wreck his fantasy value.

Larry Nance Jr.


Played 29 minutes off the bench. The starting lineup for the Cavs was David Nwaba, Alec Burks, Collin Sexton, Ante Zizic, and Deng Adel.

Wrong Adel? It’s been five games since Nance returned from injury, so hopefully he starts getting more run soon.

The Lakers got spiggity spanked in Indiana, 94-136. NO BLURBS FOR YOU!!!

Kyle Kuzma scored 12 with only 1 board, LeBron James put up a 18/7/9 line with 1 steal, Brandon Ingram went 12/6/1, Ivica Zubac produced an 8/4/1 line, while Rajon Rondo scored 3 points and dished out 6 dimes. JaVale McGee scored 16 and Lance Stephenson scored 13 points off the bench. Just an ugly, ugly performance, but considering all that’s going on with the trade rumors, it’s a little understandable.

Thaddeus Young


Only played 24 minutes. Top 50 player over the past eight games. He was drafted for the D stats, but he’s been pulling down 9 boards and dishing out 4 dimes a game. Last season, those numbers were 6 and 2 respectively.

Bojan Bogdanovic


Played 33 minutes and led the Pacers in scoring. High floor, low ceiling player who will provide a handful of tres, boards, and dimes.

Myles Turner


Leads the league in blocks (2.6 per game), but the rebound number is paltry for a big man. At 7.2 per game, that ranks him tied for 45th in the league.

Edmund Sumner and Aaron Holiday both scored 17 points in mop up duty.

Montrezl Harrell


Dude needs to learn how to shoot free throws. 42% on 3.3 attempts over the past eight games is not good. Sontrezl does not approve.

Lou Williams


In 32 minutes. Sweet! Lou has been passed around more than a cipher, which is weird because he can flat out score. No respect. Not sweet!

Marvin Williams


Over the past four games, Marvin has been a top 50 player. Don’t expect any dimes, but he can shoot and provides the D.

Kemba Walker


Played 39 minutes. So Cody Zeller returned from injury. Why do I mention that? Kemba is a much better player with Zeller on the court than off. Maybe he screens better or rolls more effectively, but whatever the case may be, the numbers don’t like. Without Zeller on the floor, Kemba is shooting 40% from the field and scored 1.09 points per possession. With Zeller, the efficiency spikes to 43% and he scores 1.15 points per possession.

Cody Zeller


Returned from injury and played 23 minutes. Remember what I wrote in the Kemba blurb? If not, then no more THC for you!!!

Hassan Whiteside


A Mt. Whiteside explosion! Played 30 minutes. It’s funny because predicting his minutes is more difficult than figuring out when an actual volcano will explode.

James Johnson


Played 27 minutes off the bench. Was his best game of the season by far, but it’s hard to trust him because he’s been pretty awful all year. With that said, someone to keep an eye on because he does have the potential to produce like last night.

Dwayne Wade


April 9, 2019.

Damian Lillard


I’m sad. It’s like the day I learned that WWF/WWE was fake.

C. J. McCollum


Played a team-high 40 minutes. Susan, let’s cut to the highlights….

Jake Layman


Played 33 minutes. Over the past four games, Layman has been a top 50 player! He’s been averaging close to 30 minutes and providing points, tres, boards, dimes, and blocks. The minutes may come down with the Rodney Hood acquisition, but it’s Rodney Hood. In addition, it’s not like Layman is the most consistent player, as the production has been all over the place, but when he gets hot, he lights it up.