Hey everyone! This week, the new leader of basketball at Razzball, Son, joins me along with Tehol to go over his top 100 rankings. Well, at least Tehol joins us for most of it, he disappears for a stretch due to some computer issues. Damn computers! Anyways, among the notable things discussed are Giannis Antetokounmpo at #1 overall, who else is in the top tier with Giannis, Son’s agressive rankings of Nikola Jokic, Lonzo Ball and Dennis Smith Jr., the impact on Kyrie Irving’s fantasy value due to his trade to Boston and what to do with Joel Embiid. All of that and plenty more on the latest edition of the Razzball Basketball Podcast brought to you by League Safe!
You can get $10 towards your fantasy sports league’s prize pool by going to leaguesafe.com/razzbasketball
On Tuesday morning, President of Basketball Operations Danny Ainge received an email. The sender was: [email protected] You don’t become the President of Basketball Operations for the Boston Celtics by being a dummy. Knowing that it was a scam of some sort, he asked his secretary to dial up the IT department so that they could help him reconfigure the spam folder settings. He saw the light for the IT department flash three times on his state-of-the-art phone before Jane, his secretary, intercommed over that Art was on the line. “Hey Art. This is Danny.” “What can I do for you, sir?” See, Art, I received this email from a Nigerian prince this morning and I was wondering if you could fix the problem so I won’t receive these spam emails anymore.” “Sir, did you try shutting the computer on and off?” Just at that moment, Jane intercommed over to say that Koby Altman, general manager of the Cleveland Cavaliers, was on the line. “Hey Art. Hold on a sec.” “Hi Koby, what can I do for you?” “Well Danny, I have a problem. You see….” Koby kept talking and talking and talking, but what Danny didn’t know was that the hackers that Dan Gilbert hired over the Dark Web a week earlier figured out a way to hypnotize an individual via their computer screen. Not to get too technical, but it required a specific state-of-the-art phone that had two lines open at the exact time with an email displayed from a particular address emanating from the screen. Unbelievable you say? Then how else can you explain the trade that went down?!
Ok, I kid. Just wanted to have fun with things. Before I get too serious, though, why was the first thing to pop into my head when the trade was announced this song?
Last week, I gave you my Top 10 for 2017 Fantasy Basketball. Today, I present to you the Top 15 after the Top 10. Since I’ve included the link for the Top 10, it’s technically the Top 25 but not really. Top 15 after Top 10 just doesn’t flow off the tongue properly, so I’ll just go with Top 25. Plus, it’s so cumbersome and annoying for me to write. Similar to if I had to spell out Giannis Antetokounmpo every time. Sure, I could just copy and paste it, but what if I had to copy and paste something else? What if I had to turn off my computer and re-copy and paste? I ain’t got time for that nonsense! Bing! Lightbulb suddenly appears over my head, which is good because my halo is now illuminated. From this day on, I shall call Giannis Antetokounmpo, G. I believe that gets G up to five nicknames now, right? That has to be the dopest nickname of all time. Hear me out. One-names were all the rage back in the day. Cher, Prince, Pele, etc…but then Prince took it to another level by eschewing letters altogether and just going with a symbol. But you know what? A symbol, while cool, is difficult to write. It’s also very difficult to utilize on the computer, although, it’s pretty amazing that people figured out a way to do it. Anyways, G is already on the keyboard. Yes, you do have to press Caps Lock or Shift to get it right, but…damn, you lazy!! Who else do you think of when I say G? When I say G, you say what? G. Anus. See? No bueno. It’s a good thing no one ever reads intros. Well, at least I will know who didn’t read this intro when I get the inevitable, “What does G stand for?”
As always, big shout-out to Slim, who provided projections and insight.
Tehol is back with me to update everyone on the newest developments around the NBA! We start off focusing on Summer League in a number of facets. Surprise players, how each of the top picks looked, who disappointed, fantasy values for the rookie class, we got it covered! I gush over Dennis Smith Jr. some more after I declared future greatness on the previous podcast while Tehol loves him some Lonzo Ball. Afterwards, I get Tehol’s opinion on some of the big summer moves that Son and I discussed on the last podcast and also hit on the Avery Bradley trade plus Kentavious Caldwell-Pope signing. From there, we hit on the rumored Melo to Rockets rumors and our thoughts on its potential impact. All of that and more on the latest edition of the Razzball Basketball Podcast!
Note: We recorded this right before it was reported Kyrie Irving wants a trade. A new podcast will drop if Kyrie or Melo are officially moved.
Throughout history, and in all facets of life, evolution happens whether we want to believe it or not. If you were a small caveman or woman, you did not go out and try to kill a wild animal. You picked berries or cooked. Nothing sexist about it. The logical thing was to let the bigger and stronger entity hunt, which unfortunately provided a generalization for future bigots. Over time, the development of our brains neutered the size difference and allowed us to change how we interacted with the world. We did get bigger and stronger physically, but we are now not so tied to specific roles like hunter/gatherer and cooker.
The inaugural 1946 NBA season consisted of 11 teams for a total of 182 players. Last season, there were 524 players in the NBA. Below is a chart showing the players grouped by height.
Welcome back to The Abode. If you missed the genesis, click here.
After a blowout-infested playoffs, the hype leading up to Warriors/Cavs III in the NBA Finals almost reached Mayweather/Pacquiao levels. Almost. Nothing will surpass the chicanery of Mayweather/Pac, though. The Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey would’ve been most impressed. Anyways, storylines and narratives were tossed around and many thought (perhaps wished?) that a heated, epic Finals would be showcased.
Game 1. Warriors 113. Cavs 91. The Cavs had 20 turnovers and the Warriors made 15 more field goals on 20 more attempts.
The Warriors Voltron’d up, while the Cavs were a bunch of scurrying ants trying to escape the ray of death from the magnifying glass of a nine-year old.
The Cavs did not panic, though, and Game 2 was an epic battle for two and a half quarters.
Your left eyebrow is connected to the… right eyebrow!
Damn, teams who took the plunge and drafted Anthony Davis are getting rewarded for their brazenness, that’s for sure! My only RCL team left standing is my Brow squad, and I actually somehow think it’s the first time I’ve ever owned Brow… Maybe I had a share or two his rookie year, but despite always championing him, never got him anywhere with early picks. Anywho, monster 36/17/3/3/3 line for a 1.5 rainbow, giving him 3 straight 30/15 games. Who wants a unibrow ride?! They should totally make a “Unibrow Ride, $0.25” shirt. Screw that, I’m gonna! Razzball store, it’s time for me to make some new products!
Who’s with me and wants to buy those?! Let’s launch a kickstrarter! Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy basketball action:
Welcome to the semis! If you’ve survived this long in your standard H2H formats, then you’re merely 2 wins away from a title. Hard to believe after the marathon! Just think of how many more games the NCAA title hopefuls have to win to get a National Title!
With a mere two weeks left, there’s only 14 more days of streaming on the docket, making every add/drop count. So now’s the time (if you haven’t yet, whaaaaaaaaaaa?!) to check out The Stocktonator! Check out or new short-shorts robotics to help with your streaming decisions for each and every day this upcoming week.
And well, I have one RCL team that WON’T need The Stocktonator, due to The Omen getting absolutely possessed last week! Damian Lillard is now my least favorite player, after going 49/1/5/0/1 with 9 treys last night on 14-21 shooting. He scored 141 points last week, hitting 19 treys, and shot 55% from the field while doing so. Cost me the playoffs with narrow wins in FG% and points for my opp in a 4-5 loss. I’m done with you, Omen! Doesn’t help he shot 36-36 from the FT line either. What a preposterous week. Not to mention that after their bad loss to the Pels last Tuesday, he held a players-only meeting which led to a huge win at San Antonio Wednesday, followed by two big wins against the East besting Hotlanta and HotMiami over the weekend. Why is Atlanta hot, but Miami isn’t?! Whoever named it Hotlanta hasn’t been to many other cities! Portland is the hot city right now though! Here’s what else went down over the hot weekend in fantasy basketball action:
For LeBron, he needed just 28 minutes to post 16/11/12 against the Pistons, a team he seems to dominate since his unforgettable 48-point performance in the 2007 Eastern Conference Finals. He wouldn’t be denied and knocked over anything in his path, including teammate Kyrie Irving:
The Cavs were in a bit of a slump, losing 4 of 5, heading into their matchup with the Pistons. With the Cavs just 2.5 games up on the Celtics, hopefully James will finish the year on a tear. It was James’ 10th triple-double of the season and third in the last four games.
Man, big weekends all around! And only fitting one of the breakout weekends of the NBA would be someone from the Suns! I was in Phoenix all weekend! …sadly not to see the Suns, but I don’t think anyone was… Grey and I were scouting some Spring Training, and us goofballs had a good ol’ desert time… Speaking of goofballs, check out this jump ball for the Suns/Celtics game on Sunday night!
It’s all fun and games for the Celtics until the Suns actually beat ya! And who better to drive home the dagger than who faced off in the short-man jump ball!
NBA getting taken over by shorties! Grey might have a shot to make the NBA at this rate! 20/2/5/1/0 for Tyler Ulis with no TO on 8-12 shooting, following 8/1/8 then 14/4/7 lines the two games prior. Of course Earl Watson would love this guy and start giving him minutes, the short guy love going all around! 23, 21, then 33 minutes in that big win yesterday. While he’s certainly worth a look in 12ers, minutes would absolutely have to come at the expense of Eric Bledsoe or Devin Booker, and I don’t see the Suns being able to give Ulis a 30+ MPG role. So that keeps him behind the Cojo’s of the world, and I’m not really fretting that I didn’t add him anywhere while I was in baseball scouting mode. Although I will say the NBA definitely has it down with being an indoor sport, my feet got sunburnt to a crisp wearing my flip flops in Phoenix! Stupid pale skin… I’m not built for the desert, even in early March! Here’s what else went down over the weekend in fantasy basketball action: