In the 1980s, WrestleMania was the merde. Pardon my French. They were spectacles of extraordinary frenzy. Rabid fans would pack 90,000 strong into stadiums to watch freakishly athletic men do freakishly mind-numbing things. And there in lies the crux of everything: the men. For all the Barnum and Bailey antics that Vince McMahon could project, without those freakishly athletic men doing freakisly mind-numbing things, he’d have to take off three or four zeros from that 90,000 figure. As Coach SamWinters from The Program so eloquently stated, “When’s the last time 80,0000 people showed up to watch a kid do a damn chemistry experiment?” The same concept applies to the NBA. Teams wouldn’t be worth billions of dollars without the freakishly athletic men doing freakishly mind-numbing things. One of the biggest stars in the NBA is Russell Westbrook and last night he went HAM.
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 23 | 19 | 15 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2/5 | 10/17 | 1/2 |
By messing around last night, Westbrook moved into a tie for third place with Jason Kidd for the most triple-dubs all-time. Oscar Robertson had 181, Magic Johnson 138, and Westbrook and Kidd are both at 107. That in of itself is impressive, but he wasn’t far away from a 20/20/20 game, which got me thinking….has anyone ever attained the double-triple-dub? Wilt Chamberlain in 1968 with 22 points, 25 rebounds, and 21 assists. Ha! That is so sick. Anyways, hope you enjoyed RussellMania last night.
Beep. Boop. Bop. The Stocktonator must love wrestling because it had Westbrook as it’s #4 player last night.
Here’s what else I saw last night:
The Utah Jazz acquired Kyle Korver in exchange for two second-round picks and Alec Burks. I’m still in shock that the Cavaliers actually made a competent move. I’ve always been a fan of Burks, who has had his share of injuries, but he’s athletic and can get buckets. Getting two draft picks is nice as well. As for Korver, he fits in well for Utah, as he will space the floor and prevent teams from sagging down on pick-and-roll action with Rudy Gobert and Ricky Rubio. Defense is another story, though. The Jazz system should be able to mask the deficiencies…at least until the playoffs.
Pau Gasol is recovering from a stress fracture and is out indefinitely as of now. This should give a slight boost to LaMarcus Aldridge, as he will play more center, and for….dare I say Jakob Poeltl? Naw, who am I kidding?
The Knicks got blown out, 91-117, by the 76ers.
Mario Hezonja
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 17 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 2/6 | 7/15 | 1/1 |
Got the start and played 26 minutes. Mario has been not-so-super as of late, as he scored fewer than seven point in six straight games. He has also played fewer than 20 minutes in four of those games. Someone needs to comb the plains of Westchester County for some magic mushrooms for our Mario.
Tim Hardaway Jr.
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 5 | 1 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0/6 | 1/11 | 3/3 |
Seven out!
Damyean Dotson
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 16 | 4 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2/6 | 6/11 | 2/2 |
Dotson was playing close to 30 minutes in October, but then the minutes slowly starting going away, culminating in a four-game stretch in which he did not get off the pine. Coach Fizdale wanted not-so-super Mario in the game for his defense. Well, according to the New York Post, several teams contacted the Knicks, who have until July 15th to guarantee Dotson’s contract for next season. Showcase showdown? The last two games, Dotson has played 23 and 24 minutes and scored 17 and 16 points respectively.
Joel Embiid
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 26 | 14 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0/3 | 10/21 | 6/8 |
Embiid to Ben Simmons and Jimmy Butler….
JJ Redick
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 24 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 4/6 | 10/14 | 0 |
Redick-ulous!
Rudy Gobert
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 23 | 16 | 3 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 10/14 | 3/9 |
Magnifique Monsieur Gobert! Tu es le meilleur!
Donovan Mitchell
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 29 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 4 | 2/8 | 12/24 | 3/4 |
Threeecolas, rebounds, and shooting efficiency are all down from last year. Have no fear, though, my Utahns. Kyle Korver is here!!!
Ricky Rubio
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 6 | 3 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0/5 | 0/9 | 6/6 |
Kyle Korver is here!!!
Rondae Hollis-Jefferson
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 14 | 11 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0/1 | 6/13 | 2/4 |
Got the start and played 28 minutes. Ring ring. Ring ring. Party Central, how may I help you? Yes, I’d like to reserve the place for a party. For what day, sir? RONDAE!!!
Jarrett Allen
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 14 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 3/6 | 8/11 |
You owners better go to Jarrett and buy him some bling for not tanking your free throw percentage.
D’Angelo Russell
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 14 | 5 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 4 | 2/6 | 6/25 | 0 |
I’m thinking he learned a little too much from Kobe when he was in LA.
Spurs got blown out, 89-128, by the Timberwolves. LMAO!
LaMarcus Aldridge
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 10 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5/11 | 0 |
LMA-O!
Derrick White
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 6 | 2 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3/6 | 0 |
Got the start and played 23 minutes. Put him back in the box.
Jakob Poeltl
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 14 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 7/10 | 0 |
Played 21 minutes. Could it be? Well, who else is going to play the center minutes? Whatever the exact opposite of a ringing endorsement is….that was it.
Robert Covington
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 21 | 9 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4/9 | 8/15 | 1/2 |
Led the team in scoring and….is shooting efficiently from the field? My brain can’t handle that. The game before last night, Covington also put up….
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 24 | 7 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0 | 4/7 | 8/12 | 4/5 |
This would make for an excellent Twilight Zone episode.
Karl-Anthony Towns
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 16 | 11 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 2/4 | 6/11 | 2/2 |
Meow. Meep. Moop. Mop. The Stocktonator loved KAT last night. Not shocking as the screen saver is a bunch of floating cats.
Cedi Osman
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 14 | 10 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2/6 | 6/14 | 0 |
Played 40 minutes. And he didn’t tank the shooting percentage. Osman! Now, the acquisition of Alec Burks could put a damper on things. There’s no way of knowing how things will pan out, but me thinks the Cavaliers like Osman and want to continue developing him.
Tristan Thompson
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 4 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 2/8 | 0 |
All is right in the world.
Collin Sexton
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 21 | 10 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 1/2 | 9/20 | 2/2 |
First game with at least 10 assists. Time for some Sexton! Over the past four games, he’s playing close to 36 minutes a game. The 6.5 rebounds are nice from the guard position, but the assists are only at 3. There are limited contributions in threeecolas and D stats as well. Put it all together and he’s been the #128 player for fantasy over the four games. If he can increase the assists, top 100 player is feasible.
Jordan Clarkson
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 25 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 4/8 | 10/22 | 1/3 |
Clarkson has consistently been a top 150 player all season.
Jerami Grant
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 21 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 1/4 | 8/12 | 4/5 |
Grant has scored in double figures in 16 of the last 17 games. Don’t expect any dimes, but 1.3 threeecolas, 0.8 blocks, 0.8 steals, with 5.5 boards ain’t bad, yo! Top 100 player for fantasy.
Alex Abrines
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 3 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1/8 | 1/9 | 0 |
Got the start and played 27 minutes. It makes sense to have another shooter out there, but there’s a reason he doesn’t get significant run. It starts with D and ends with E. On the season, Abrines has been struggling with his shot (31% from downtown), but he’s a career 37% shooter. If you need threeecolas, Abrines could be a cheap source if he continues to start.
Dennis Schroder
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 6 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0/3 | 2/9 | 2/2 |
Played 23 minutes. What a menace…to his owners!
Kelly Oubre Jr.
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 22 | 6 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 4/8 | 9/18 | 0/1 |
Got the start and played 35 minutes. Third time scoring 22 points on the nose this season, so it’s definitely within the range of outcomes. Unfortunately, so is scoring 1 point on 0-for-5 shooting.
Bradley Beal
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 16 | 5 | 11 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 1/5 | 7/15 | 1/1 |
Season-high in assists, so probably an outlier, as he’s averaging 4.1 on the season. With that said, Beal has scored in double-figures in every game this season and is a top 30 player for fantasy.
Markieff Morris
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 22 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 4/9 | 9/17 | 0/1 |
Played 32 minutes and continues to get run at center. As long as that keeps happening, Morris is fantasy relevant. I just puked in my mouth.
Anthony Davis
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 28 | 15 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 2/9 | 9/21 | 8/9 |
Yawn. His floor is the ceiling for 99.9% of the players in the league.
Tim Frazier
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 12 | 6 | 12 | 2 | 0 | 3 | 2/6 | 4/8 | 2/2 |
Got the start and played 37 minutes. Looks to be matchup thing so don’t get your panties in a bunch.
Jrue Holiday
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 29 | 7 | 5 | 1 | 1 | 3 | 3/7 | 12/19 | 2/4 |
The assists are way up from last season (8.9 vs 6), but so are the turnovers (4 vs 2.6). Does someone need a Holiday? Regardless, still a top 30 player for fantasy.
Julius Randle
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 23 | 12 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 0/1 | 10/15 | 3/3 |
Over the past eight games, Randle has been the #20 player for fantasy. 20.4 points, 10.9 rebounds, 3.6 assists, 1 steal, 0.5 blocks, 56% from the field, 81% from the line, and only 2.4 turnovers. I shall go play real-life Frogger on the freeway now.
Jabari Parker
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 24 | 8 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2/6 | 9/21 | 4/7 |
Ever since Jabari got bit by the spider at cousin Peter’s house, he’s been otherwordly. Over the past seven games, he’s been a top 60 player, averaging 20.7 points, 8.9 rebounds, 3.6 assists, and 1.3 steals. If I see Jabari grab a defensive rebound, shoot a string of web onto the overhead scoreboard, swing across the entire court, then slam dunk…..I won’t be surprised.
Ryan Arcidiacono
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 22 | 5 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 5/9 | 6/12 | 5/5 |
Back-to-back 22 point games for Arcidiacono. Eccezionale! Is Kris Dunn?
Zach LaVine
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 24 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 2/6 | 8/18 | 6/6 |
#AllStar. You win Brent.
Robin Lopez
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 17 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0/1 | 8/10 | 1/1 |
No, it wasn’t Robin Lopez bobblehead night. Wendell Carter Jr. fouled out.
Giannis Antetokounmpo
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 36 | 11 | 8 | 2 | 1 | 4 | 0/3 | 14/21 | 8/12 |
Yawn. His floor is the ceiling for 99.9% of players in the league. Wait? Where else did I write that? In the AD blurb. GA. AD. GAAD. Pronounced God. It all makes sense now.
Malcolm Brogdon
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 24 | 5 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 6/6 | 8/11 | 2/2 |
Like a child actor, Malcolm is growing up in front of our eyes. No longer content with being in the middle, Brogdon is a top 70 player for fantasy and has been top 15 over the past four games.
Devin Harris
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 20 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 5/6 | 6/8 | 3/3 |
When did we ascertain reincarnation technology? Played 15 minutes, as the Mavs blew out the Rockets, 128-108. Don’t even think about it.
JJ Barea
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 13 | 3 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1/2 | 5/9 | 2/2 |
Played 18 minutes. 22nd in the league with 5.8 assists per game. He plays under 20 minutes a game.
James Harden
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 25 | 11 | 17 | 6 | 0 | 8 | 4/11 | 7/15 | 7/9 |
No Chris Paul again, so Harden had a 31 usage rate. For shits and giggles, I checked to see if anyone has ever notched a quintuple-dub. Negative. Although, I’m not sure turnovers would count. For you inquiring minds, there have been four quadruple-dubs.
Danuel House Jr.
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 18 | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2/8 | 6/13 | 4/6 |
Played 23 minutes after playing 28 the prior game. That’s how short-handed the Rockets are without Paul and Gerald Green.
John Collins
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 9 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 3 | 0/3 | 3/10 | 3/3 |
Not a great shooting night, but those 20/10 games are right around the corner.
Kevin Huerter
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 12 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 4/7 | 4/9 | 0 |
Continues to start and played 34 minutes. Second time getting at least 30 minutes of run, with the other game against the Hornets as well. Prior to last night, Huerter had been starting but was only getting around 21 minutes per game. As the season progresses, that number should ramp up and so should the production. Threeecolas and rebounds with a smattering of dimes and steals.
Marvin Williams
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 0 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0/2 | 0/3 | 0/2 |
Williams was coming off two back-to-back great games before last night’s clunker. In addition, in two prior meetings with the Hawks, he had scored 20 in each contest and pulled down 13 and 8 boards. All is truly right in the world now.
Jeremy Lamb
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 22 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1/2 | 6/12 | 9/9 |
Led the team in scoring.
Mikal Bridges
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1/3 | 0 |
Well, ok then. That’s now three straight games scoring 2 points and he’s shot 1-for-3, 1-for-6, and 1-for-8. Maybe this Bridges is under troubled waters.
Deandre Ayton
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 4 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 1/4 | 2/2 |
I saw his soul fly out of his body after Darren Collison made him TIMBEEERR the other night. He better go find it and get it back.
Elie Okobo
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 19 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 3 | 3/5 | 8/12 | 0 |
Played 31 minutes. After averaging 13 minutes in six games this month, then getting sent down to the G-League, Okobo made a triumphant return to action. Whatever your question is….¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Richaun Holmes
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 10 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 4/6 | 2/3 |
Over the past six games, Holmes has averaged around 17 minutes, 9.7 points, 5.2 rebounds, and 2 blocks per game. Who else is going to play backup big man minutes? Odale Holmes.
Danilo Gallinari
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 28 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 4/4 | 7/10 | 10/12 |
Gallinari is a top 35 player for fantasy. Molto impressionante! With that said, what date does the office pool have now?
Tobias Harris
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 18 | 10 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 3/6 | 7/15 | 1/2 |
Boban Marjanovic
| PTS | REB | AST | STL | BLK | TOV | 3PT | FG | FT |
| 12 | 12 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 3/6 | 6/6 |
Got the start and did what Boban do…in 19 minutes!
