For the love of tripdubs! Dayum Draymond Green had a ridiculous Friday night, nay, a legendary Friday night! One of the craziest lines I can remember since helming Razzball hoops, Dray was the one bringing the defense instead of the Grizz, going 4/12/10/10/5.
Well, when Marc Gasol tries a slow-ass, lackluster behind-the-back dribble right in front of you, it’s easy to get 10 steals! I think I coulda stolen that! Speaking of stealing, Andre Iguodala totally stole my dance move at the end of that highlight there… When I go to the club, it’s like I’m walking on hot coals! Anyway, it was the NBA’s first triple-double without scoring 10 points, and Dray couldn’t even get a 5×5 line! Chump. Then #Occupy followed it up Saturday with a 6/8/8/3/1 line, with the weekend boosting his season averages to 2.1 steals and 1.5 blocks per. He’s exactly copying the 7.4 AST which he also had in 15-16, but he’s cut down the TO from 3.2 to 2.4 this year, while averaging career-bests in the stocks. We all expected the scoring to go down, but man, the defense numbers the Dubs crank out is insanity, thanks in part to their pace. If you didn’t win steals and blocks with Dray’s 13 steals and 6 blocks over the weekend, then something went drastically wrong! Would be time to occupy that trading block! Here’s what else went down over a fun weekend of NBA action:
Jusuf Nurkic – Traded to the Portland Trailblazers for Mason Plumlee. Starting with the ass end of the deal, Plumlee can be cut pretty much everywhere. His fun little asset of assists-from-the-5 are going to dry up, thanks to a little jock itch. But at least the Jamba Jus is back in business! I bet there’s like, 15 Jamba Juices in Portland… Anyway, I don’t see any reason the Blazers wouldn’t start Nurk right away (or at least run him big minutes) and see what they have. Running pick-n-roll with The Omen and C.J. McChhhhhhhhhoooolllluuuum could be mad effective. I’d give him an add in 12ers and deeper to see how he looks in a much-needed new uniform.
Nikola Jokic – Speaking of a little jock itch, Nikola’s case is engulfing his whole body! He looks like Edward Norton from Kingdom of Heaven! Went ballistic against the Poppycockers Friday for 40/9/5/2/0 on 17-23 shooting. Connor going ham on that call! Then went ice cold Saturday at the Cavs, for a pedestrian 27/13/4/0/2. Man, he’s been an absolute roller coaster of emotion! First, I clowned some ‘perts ranking him so high. Then, we had to convince people just to not drop him! Now, it looks like I criminally underranked him. Crazy jock itch!
Dewayne Dedmon – Starring in the upcoming movie, The Edge of 17 Two! 17/17/0/1/2 against the Pistons Friday, but cooled off for only 3/7/0/2/1 against the Poppycockers yesterday afternoon. I don’t care if they shocked the Spurs, the way this season has gone down for them in Gotham, they’re the Poppycockers for years to come!
Brandon Jennings – Started next to Derrick Rose on Friday for 6/2/13, but back to the bench yesterday and only got 2/3/3. I streamed for a BJ on that one! Like Ellie Kemper’s online breakthrough, it was a BJ fail…
Willy Hernangomez – Mannnnn, he look gooooood yesterday. I don’t understand why it’s even a question if he should be getting run vs. Kyle O’Quinn… After shooting 6-7 for 12/4 in only 9 minutes Friday, gets the starting nod yesterday afternoon and goes 12/9/1/3/0 on 6-8 shooting, including a pivotal jumper and sexy reverse layup late in the game. If The Poppycockers can dump Rose and Melo, and rebuild around Willy and The Goose up front, mmmmm that’ll be a fun team.
James Johnson – The year of the neck tat continues! Awesome weekend from JJ, going 26/8/2/1/3 then 26/4/3/0/2. Shot 19-32 from the field and 13-17 from the line, with the only fault being the 7 turnovers. I can’t believe the Heat’s winning streak ended on Saturday at Philly of all teams! Without EMBIIIIIIIID!
Jameer Nelson – Whoa, muscle hamster coming to play! Wait, that’s Doug Martin… But I could see Jameer as an NFL RB! 16/4/12 then 12/8/8 lines over the weekend, with 6 combined treys.
Ivica Zubac – Savior of the known universe! This is becoming a fun running gag, I bequeath on Zubac the official nickname: “The Savior”. Tell your friends, but copyright to Razzball! Anyway, 15/6/2/0/1 on 7-11 shooting Friday night, in only 21 minutes. Unleash this guy, you Purp-n-Gold clowns!
Giannis Antetokounmpo – With Khris Middleton still coming along (nice 21 minutes of 6/1/6/3/0 Friday, but DNP Saturday), Greeky going freaky this weekend! 41/8/6/2/3 in a career-high scoring night, plus dat rainbow doe! Then 20/8/10/1/2 Saturday. Combined – wait for it – 30-35 FT!!! Just throw on some tzatziki and I’d eat him right up!
Karl-Anthony Towns – While Greek Freak has leap-frogged KAT for me, KAT still let it be known he’s an elite asset, going 36/8/1 then 22/7/4. But where’s the beef?! Only 1 combined steal and no blocks this weekend?! I guess KATs are notorious for not having much beef, it’s why they only eat dogs in countries that do that sorta thing…
Kevin Seraphin – A former REL flame of mine, Seraphin keeps giving us these little glimpses, then barely gets run! 16/7/1/0/2 Friday, but only 8 minutes Saturday. Seraphin Fails!
Markieff Morris – Gimme a night off, and I’ll show you what Kieff can do! Sat a game with a sore calf, then went gangbusters on the Pacers for 26/10/3/1/0 with no TO, and a dagger trey late. He’s the big X factor for this Wiz team!
Alan Williams – After Tyson Chandler picked up a kankle Friday night, stepped into 24 minutes against the Bulls and went 14/11/0/0/4. Can’t stop The Big Sauce! Well, the refs can… Got only 10 minutes Saturday in the encore, and committed 5 fouls. Had 3 turnovers as well… Stagnant Sauce!
Tim Hardaway Jr. – ThrAGNOF, flourish! 28/4/2 Friday night, with 3 treys and 7-8 FT. Just needed a little Korver-ectomy to get going!
Darren Collison – Kept it rolling in that game against the Hawks, going 22/3/4/2/0 with 2 treys and the game-winning layup. I almost made the GIF for it, but I decided to avoid GIFs of players with character flaws… Well, dammit, I ruined that with Draymond “ball kick” Green and Blake “shut your mouth, co-worker!” Griffin!
Ben McLemore – Hmmmm, surprise line from Benny Mac in that game, going 22/9/3/4/0 with 6 treys in a whopping 42 minutes. Showcase game for Ryan Lewis’s buddy?!
Frank Kaminsky – Whoa, Frank the Stank might push Cody Zeller for some minutes at this rate! 36 minutes with Zeller out (renewed quad soreness), going 20/8/5/1/2 with no TO and 3 treys against the Clippers. DeAndre Jordan isn’t guarding centers out there by the perimeter! Nice showing from a guy that I thought would inevitably be a failure as a stretch-4 or a pure-5. Looks like he can handle some of the latter!
Blake Griffin – Miles Plumlee be like, “can I go back to Milwaukee and get DNPs again?! PUH-LEAZE!!!???”
Bobby Portis – Got 31 minutes yesterday due to half the Bulls being overrun like they’re at Pamplona, going an empty 16/6/0/0/0. We got Nurk a new uni, lets get Portis new digs!
Monta Ellis – Still alive, that Monta! 8/1/8 then 18/4/1/0/2 over the weekend, but mainly it’s the 28 then 32 minutes that should be intriguing for deeper leagues.
Reggie Jackson – Ugh, that StanVan doghouse is open again for business! Only 16 minutes for RJax, while Ish Smith led the starters to a big comeback win in Toronto, going 15/5/5 in 31 minutes. Yeesh, not much you can do, other than maybe roster Ish as insurance if you can…
Dario Saric – I’ve hated on Saric a few times in the past, but he’s hot right now and I’d def own him! Hey, anyone in the NBA with minutes could get hot… 19/6/4/2/1 in a nice 5-cat line Saturday, but I’m still pretty meh on him ROS. Ben Simmons ain’t gonna help things…
Nerlens Noel – Got the start in that win over the Heat, going 19/3/1/4/1. Jahlil Okafor was reportedly sat due to “trade rumors” and he didn’t fly with the team for tonight’s game, so he might be outta town. I’m still a little lukewarm on Noel though, Joel Embiid is still gonna be the alpha with his 2-foot long EMBIIIIID when he’s ready.
Andre Roberson – Man, sexy little run Andre is on. Andre the Giant! 6/11/1/1/3 against Golden State, and with his heavy minutes lately (34+ mins last 4), he probably should be owned in all 12ers.
Yogi Ferrell – Well, the chronically ill Deron Williams returned and played only 16 minutes back in the starting line-up, but the Mavs beating the Magic by 32 didn’t help paint the picture here… Hot Yogi still got 32 of his own minutes, going 10/3/7/0/0 with 2 treys and 3 TO. Might be starting to go back to Cold Yogi…
Patrick Beverley – He always seems to have lingering injury things going on, but appears to be finally getting through it the past 3 games, including a beaut of a 19/10/5/2/0 line against the Suns, hitting 6-10 FG (4-4 3PTM 3-3 FT). Nice 29 point win too for the Rox. That Pbev D!
Kelly Olynyk – I added him in a couple RCLs off his 19/7/3/2/2 rainbow against the Jazz with 3 treys, but he’ll go back to 11 minutes of nada knowing my luck… Nice little run he’s on though…
Russell Westbrook/Kevin Durant – Gave us some nice drama in OKC, with Russ barking to KD about something. Great to see the crowd rally behind booing Durant every time he touched the ball… Unfortunately though, it was a smart career move… The Warriors are redonk, and won big. “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but Russ’s words don’t mean ish if I win some titles!”
I hope everyone had a great weekend, and is looking forward to the upcoming All-Star Break! Catch you in the comments and the Pod tomorrow morning!
