Julius Caesar was a brilliant tactician and politician, who expanded the Roman Empire. He got greedy, though, when he declared himself dictator. As a result, members of the Roman Senate conspired and stabbed him in the back, both literally and figuratively. Julius Randle is a no-nonsense player who bullies defenders down low. Bull in a china shop is an apt description, especially since he’s 6′ 9″ and 250 pounds. After he spent the first four years of his career in Los Angeles, he took his talents to New Orleans and didn’t mess around. He was the same bull that he had been with the Lakers. Last night, though….

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
21 14 10 1 0 0 0/1 9/13 3/3

….Julius did mess around, notching his sixth career triple-dub. In only 25 minutes! There’s been nothing but love for Julius in New Orleans, as he provides the team with a physical presence down low, who can also be a playmaker in the third-fastest team in the NBA for offensive pace. Ain’t nobody stabbing this Julius in the back. From a fantasy perspective, though, don’t go slicing and dicing your team to acquire his services. He’s a fine player, as he’s currently the 87th player according to Basketball Monster. The issues are the limited minutes, lack of threeecolas, low assists, and miniscule defensive contributions. Hopefully no one comes and stab me in the back now.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

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Juan is twenty THREE years old. This is year THREE in the NBA for Juan. Entering last night’s game, Juan had made an average of two point THREE shots and one point THREE THREE-pointers. Juan had attempted THREE minus zero point one THREE-pointers. Last night was start number THREE for Juan. Well, Juan is the lede so he must have done something good.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
25 9 1 1 0 1 2/5 9/12 5/7

THREE more points and Juan would have set a new career-high! Before I get internet tomatoes thrown at my internet head, I focus on THREE because the boy can shoot from beyond the arc. He’s a career 38% shooter from downtown, but that mark should be higher because it’s tainted by a 28% mark in a 25 game sample last season. Juan is starting, getting minutes, and should continue providing THREEs and rebounds. When Will Barton returns, Juan will likely return to the bench, but that won’t be for at least a couple more weeks. Ready? Juan, two, THREEE!!!

Here’s what else I saw last night:

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I’m going to keep it pretty simple this week. I’d like to check in on category leaders to help figure out who the best specialists might be this season. There’s a lot of value sitting out in the free agent pool just waiting for you to stream it. Adding and rotating through these category specialists applies in roto leagues when you notice individual categories in which you stand to gain a few points. But, this information will probably help the most in head-to-head leagues where you should be swapping out at least a couple players each week (assuming you can) to customize and maximize your stats in a way that nets you the most category wins against your opponent.

“So… you’re just pasting an NBA stat leaders’ page?” Nope. I’m only going to feature players rostered in less than 50% of Yahoo leagues. Italicized players are owned in less than 25%. For shooting percentages, I’m using Basketball Monster’s values that are weighted for volume. Next week, I’ll do sorta the opposite and list the punt specialists (value rankings with each individual category removed), as well as the rankings according to some other helpful stat combinations. I’ll leave out the flukey or injured players to save you some time here, as well.

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LeBron James was born in Akron, Ohio, played high school ball for St. Vincent-St. Mary High School, which is located in Akron, Ohio, and was drafted by the Cleveland Cavaliers, whose stadium is a 50 minute drive from Akron, Ohio. He is the SON that morphed into the King, but no reign endures forever and every SON eventually leaves the nest (two times now for LBJ). When LeBron left back in 2010, the Cavaliers went from winning 61 games and losing in the Eastern Conference Semis to losing 63 games. He did leave behind a couple of SONs, though: Daniel GibSON, J.J. HickSON, and Antawn JamiSON. Barf. Last year, the Cavaliers wont 50 games and lost in the NBA Finals. With LeBron moving to Hollywood, the Cavaliers were 1-11 entering last night’s game. Vomit. This time, though, LeBron left behind a different group of SONs (Tristan ThompSON, Jordan ClarkSON, and Andrew HarriSON), who produced a performance befitting a king last night for a 113-89 victory over the Charlotte Hornets.

Tristan ThompSON

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
11 21 5 0 0 4 0 5/6 1/2

TT has been en fuego lately, as he’s produced a double-dub in four straight games, has averaged 32 minutes over that span, has hoisted up 11 shots per game, and has been a top 100 player for fantasy! What world are we living in? If you need blocks and boards, this is one reality show you want to subscribe to. Beep. Boop. Bop. The Stocktonator must love reality tv because it liked Thompson last night.

Jordan ClarkSON

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
24 5 2 0 1 4 1/4 9/15 5/5

Clarkson is a professional hucker and chucker, as he’s jacked up 13.5 shots in 23.8 minutes on the season. Due to all the recent injuries, Clarkson has been receiving over 28 minutes per game (three games) and has been contributing in boards and assists. Seriously, we are living in a world where Tristan Thompson is a top 100 player for fantasy and Jordan Clarkson is contributing in other categories besides points.

Andrew HarriSON

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
2 2 2 0 0 1 0/2 0/3 2/2

Played 13 minutes. That’s when you know things are going good. Andrew is the forgotten SON because he sucks, but he’s family, so we have to show him some love.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

There are certain things that cut across all cultures and have the same meaning, irrespective of language differences. When a signficant other says, “We need to talk,” you’re F’d. When a parent addresses you by your full name, you done F’d up. When you hear the opening bars of Beethoven’s 5th Symphony, something bad is about to happen. Or someone bad is about to do some very bad things. DRUM DRUM DRUMMOND. Andre Drummond of the Detroit Pistons was a bad, bad man yesterday:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
23 22 3 3 2 2 0 9/16 5/7

That was Drummond’s fifth 20/20 game of the season and 10th double-dub. He has played 12 games. He is also leading the league in rebounds with 16.6 per game. DRUM DRUM DRUMMOND. Currently, he is the 39th player according to Basketball Monster after finishing as the 22nd player last season. The main reason is the drop in assists (3 vs 1.5). If only he could hit his free throws! Regardless, 19.6 points, 16.6 rebounds, 1.5 assists, 1.2 steals, and 1.6 blocks while shooting 56% from the field makes for a bad, bad (as in good, good) player for fantasy. DRUM DRUM DRUMMOND.

Beep. Boop. Bop. I was wondering why the Stocktonator had Beethoven’s 5th Symphony on loop yesterday. It loved Drummond and had him as the #4 player.

Here’s what else I saw yesterday:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Steve Urkel was a character on the television show, Family Matters. He was always disrespected because he looked like a nerd and spoke in a high-pitched voice. He was also clumsy and caused havoc, which often led him to saying, “Did I do that?” Well, some of the same things could be said for CJ McCollum of the Portland Trail Blazers. He’s often disrespected because he looks like a nerd compared to Damian Lillard and his game isn’t flashy, yet….

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
40 5 6 4 0 2 5/10 17/26 1/2

Is a 40-burger flashy enough? As the picture above shows the uncanny resemblance, there’s also video:

Seriously, has anyone ever seen Urkel and McCollum in the same room at the same time? Anyways, CJ had himself a night, as he played 36 minutes and set season-highs in field goal attempts and makes, threeecola attempts and makes, assists, steals, and points. CJ can be frustrating to own for fantasy because he is pretty meh most of the time, but he is silky smooth (enjoy the video clip at the end of the post) and does have the ceiling to go bonkers from time to time. He’s currently the #60 player according to Basketball Monster.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Okay, admittedly, a lot of us “Fantasy Basketball Experts” hate on Blake Griffin, due to his lack of defensive stats and overall efficiency. However, he has been straight beasting to start the year for Detroit. Let’s be honest, who else can get buckets? There’s something to be said about a player that has aggressiveness. Some players are solid fantasy players, but lack that intangible quality that makes a real difference maker in the NBA. Blake Griffin went 2-38-13-6-2-0-7 on 12-of-21 shooting and 12-for-16 from the charity stripe. He’s never going to be a blocks guy, but the out-of-position assists really float his value outside of the points and boards. Maybe there’s something abut him, that you just don’t like, but the man has been getting it done this year so far. Will he sustain it? Well, I think the points and the FG% come down some, but the rest of the numbers are fairly sustainable, so he’s pretty much a hold unless you wanna be a hater like the rest of us ‘perts.

There were eight games on the schedule this Saturday in the NBA, so let’s dive on in to the daily notes!

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I try to reserve the lede for players that had unbelieveable games. It usually works out because one of the superstars is always doing something amazing. Every once in a while, though, an outlier happens which pushes all others to the wayside. Last night, we had one of those events, as the Cleveland Cavaliers celebrated their first win of the season over the Atlanta Hawks. Geez, how bad are the Hawks? Anyways, the Cavs are dead-last in defensive efficiency and near the bottom in offensive pace, assists, efficient field goal percentage, and true shooting percentage. Good times. Looking at the schedule, they play the Hawks once more on December 29th. 2-80!!!

When looking at the stats below, make sure you view them in the proper context: they played the Atlanta Hawks.

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Before we embark upon a new endeavor, we often count one…two…three…then go! For the rookie down in Hotlanta, the start to this new season has gone uno…dos…Trae Young is here!

GM PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
1 14 6 5 0 0 4 1/5 5/14 3/4
2 20 2 9 1 1 3 4/9 7/18 2/3
3 35 2 11 1 0 1 6/14 13/23 3/3

Young has improved each game in points, assists, turnovers, threeecolas, and field goals. Maybe it’s a case of “Third time is a charm,” but I’m more inclined to believe that it was a case of warming up the engine. You know who’s with me? The Stocktonator, as it liked him yesterday. Beep. Boop. Bop. There’s a reason he was the overall #5 pick in the NBA Draft and has been compared to Stephen Curry. Now, yesterday was likely a ceiling game and there will be plenty of ups and downs, but oh what a ceiling it is. Played 38 minutes and led his team to a 22 point victory over the Cavs. Make it rain, Trae.

Here’s what else I saw yesterday:

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In Latin, Anno Domini means “in the year of the Lord.” Any coincidence that Anthony Davis is the fantasy lord? I think not. AD was the consensus overall number one pick coming into the season, and for good reason. He hammer times and moon walks over the competition by literally doing everything. For the infidels who blasphemously inserted another player on the throne, take a look at last nights line and ponder your unfulfilling existence.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
32 16 8 3 3 1 0 13/21 6/7

This wasn’t no “Devin Booker score 70 points in a double digit loss” line. This was a “let’s beatdown the Houston Rockets by 19 points” line. Bend the knee.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?