…Well I dunno what he woulda snitched about, but ya know…
The injuries and tanking DNPs continue in one of the most utterly annoying final months to the NBA in recent memory. There will always be guys getting hurt, but we’ve lost yet another with Hassan Whiteside tearing up his hand and needing 10 stitches last night after jamming it up against the rim. Right in the webbing! Between the fingers! Youchie. After the game he said he couldn’t feel it. I’m no doctor, but none of that sounds good for his status tonight! I mean, sometimes losing all feeling in a hand can be good like in The Stranger… Certainly sounds like he’ll take at least a game off, unless they can fit him with one of those oven mitts they give guys in the NFL when they play with broken hands. It might end up being a good thing, because if Kelly Olynyk says something about Whiteside’s mama, we could see an even longer suspension! Here’s what else went down last night in another “dropping like flies” night of fantasy basketball action:
Khris Middleton – Well, at least we can start on a positive note! With Middletit’s desperation trey dropping in like a fly! Unreal buzzer beater that I can’t believe he had enough time to put up, especially since he was 1-7 from deep until that frenzied shot. Game-winners should be a stat!
Zaza Pachulia – Zaza arms used every bit of em to get Middletit that ball, in a redonk 14/11/7/5/1 line. Certainly helped that Whiteside wasn’t looming around on D! Too busy bleeding everywhere… But you know I’ve been carrying the torch for Zaza needing to be owned in more leagues! Nice out-of-position dimes, but at the cost of some FG%/TO/Blk.
Chris Andersen – The lack of upside for minutes make him still pretty low end, but if there’s no Whiteside tonight I think he could be a decent stream. But not good enough for an official stream call!
Kentavious Caldwell-Pope – I’m like waking up naked every night with no memory due to my relapse back in the KCP addiction! Man he’s playing some great ball… 26/6/4, didn’t have a steal but also didn’t commit a TO. Put another 5 treys on the board! I’m brushing my teeth with my finger in glee!
Reggie Jackson – Also playing really well these past few weeks as he’s gelling in the DET system. 28/5/9/1/0 with no TO either, hitting 10-18 with a couple treys. All of that production with no TO from either G?! One of the most efficient backcourt games in the NBA this year!
Kyle Lowry – Ugh. Certainly helped the DET guys with Lowry having to leave early! The back spasms flared back up, and for a team willing to rest him with no “official” injury a few weeks ago, this is no bueno for Lowry owners. I’d highly doubt he plays tonight which would make…
Greivis Vasquez – A nice low end stream. I’ve said too much! More below.
Lou Williams – Also got a nice influx of shots with Lowry out, playing 33 minutes for 6-11 FG (3-6 3PTM 4-5 FT) 19/2/0/0/0 with 3 TO in a pretty ThrAGNOFfy showing. More FT Lou! Less TO! More steals!
Monta Ellis – “He’s on fire!” in NBA Jam voice. 38 points on 16-27 shooting in a possible playoff-advancing type of game for Ellis owners. Huge one there!
Dirk Nowitzki – I was reviewing my ranks with Las on Twitter, and Dirk might’ve been my worst rank. I was pretty much right with the consensus, but jeepers pretty much everything has fallen across the board. He’s going to be infuriating to rank next year since he still has value, but I won’t feel good about drafting him at all.
Tiago Splitter – Man, rough game across the board for the Spurs except Kawhi Leonard, with Splitter falling back down to Earth right after I pick him as a stream. Sheesh. 8/4/1/3/1 so at least he did something, but 4 TO in only 22 minutes?! I can’t believe they ran Boris Diaw for 29 either, especially since he wasn’t doing much of anything.
Jordan Clarkson – Whoa, look at the Lakers exploiting the non-existant OKC D! Career-high for J-Clark for 30/4/7/1/3 with a couple of treys hitting 12-19 from the field. Just an unreal game, and I wonder if he’s done enough to keep the Lakers from signing a big-ticket PG and they instead go for bigs…
Jeremy Lin – Got the start as the Lakers went combo G, going 30 minutes for 19/2/7/0/0 with a couple of treys. Maybe this sticks, and I would look for Lin on the wire for some late streams.
Carlos Boozer/Jordan Hill – Ugggghhhhh! Friggin’ tanking teams man! Both will be sat 4-5 games according to the Lakers coaching staff, just to evaluate younger guys. Hey Lakers coaches, I have a staff for you! And somehow Ed Davis isn’t included in this evaluation, only playing 16 minutes…
Ryan Kelly – Slim’s favorite NBA player from Whoville got the start at PF, going 16/5/2/2/1 in a near rainbow with 2 treys and no TO. Not too shabby! With the Purp and Gold giving us a Purp Nurp, Kelly is a nice streaming option available virtually everywhere. I’ve said too much again! More below.
Wayne Ellington – Shifted to the bench, but was decent for 6-14 FG (3-6 3PTM) 15/3/2/1/0. Don’t like the 24 minutes and should be even lower-ThrAGNOFfy as Lin starting will probably stick.
Anthony Morrow – Came off the bench as OKC started a huge line-up against a team starting two PG… Dion Waiters at the 2 against a PG? Eh, whatev… Waiters was pretty good for 23/4/4 with Morrow going full ThrAGNOF for 12/0/0/0/0 all on 4 treys.
Steven Adams – Whoa, look at The Big Kiwi making the freebies! 16/10/3/2/0 making 5-6 FG and 6-6 FT, but yet another foul-plagued game getting 5 in 30 minutes. A really bad foul out is coming, I can feel it brewing!
Enes Kanter – Just destroyed R-Kelly and company at the 4, going 25/16/4/1/0 on 10-15 FG and 5-5 FT. I mean, it couldn’t have been a prettier matchup. For tonight, the Wolves don’t really have a good PF right now (sorry Adreian Payne), but Lakers opps down the road should get some monster games from their PFs.
Robert Covington – Even with Jason Richardson not constipating the minutes, only 27 minutes for RobCov. Camon Gary! Did have the 5 fouls, but Lord Covington was killing it for 7-9 FG (5-6 3PTM 2-4 FT) 21/3/1/1/1. Just can’t trust him at all unless you know in advance J-Rich is out (like we did last night).
Ish Smith – Continues to play well especially for 8-catters, going 13/8/7/1/0 with a trey albeit with a 9-cat loathing 7 TO. 29:30 of PT to only 19 minutes for Isaiah Canaan, who played decent shooting 5-10 FG (2-6 3PTM 1-1 FT) 13/0/1/1/0 and only the 1 TO. Obviously rather Ish, but decent stream play call from me last night on Canaan.
DeMarcus Cousins – This just in! He’s really good at basketball. But took it to a new level with a near double rainbow against the Sixers! I mean, who wasn’t expecting a monster game in this one? 33/17/3/4/4, although shot only 8-27 from the field, salvaged a tad by 17-19 FT.
Damian Lillard – Tried to put Portland on his back with both LaMarcus Aldridge (finger sprain) and Nicolas Batum (back) out for 29/7/5/1/1 with 6 treys. Both sound really iffy for tonight, so def rolling with The Omen tonight in Daily.
C.J. McCollum – Well, turns out he was the stream of choice shooting the second most shots on the Blazers behind Lillard, going 9-18 FG (3-5 3PTM 2-4 FT) 23/1/2/3/0. Love the steals, but otherwise a little empty scoring. Kinda weird Dorell Wright didn’t get more of a chance than 21 minutes (12/5/2 with 2 treys) given the hole at F. Who had Alonzo Gee for 31 minutes, second behind Lillard?!
Robin Lopez – Yeah, my jokes about him being so terrible are coming frightfully to a sudden fruition. Those are some pretty fancy F words to counterbalance the non-fancy ones Rolo owners have been using!
Andrew Bogut – Monster 24 minutes for 10/16/6/1/0. I was worried the minutes would be low in a blowout, but the short-handed Blazers hung around.
Andre Iguodala – Even with Klay Thompson back and Stephen Curry dropping his normal elite line, Iggy was beastly off the bench for 21/4/4/1/0 on 9-11 FG and 3-4 from deep. Harrison Barnes took the brunt of it for 13/3/0/0/0, even though he still played big minutes. Really all top 6 of the Warriors had monster games in a 122 point outing. Shocker!
Streamers/Cheap Daily League Picks:
Greivis Vasquez (11% owned) – I know, I know, I mentioned my streams earlier, but yeah with Lowry likely out, I think even the low-ish upside from The Twerp is worth a spin.
Ryan Kelly (1% owned) – Great matchup tonight against the Wolves which should see some big scoring, Kelly has very little to contend with for minutes with the Lakers benching everyone. Should be a league minimum in Daily and available virtually everywhere for deepers if you don’t have a full line-up.