LOGIN

I love food. American. Korean. Chinese. Italian. French. Vietnamese. Brazilian. I show no discrimination towards race or culture. There’s a reason why I am now nine quarters, after being a svelt 165 pounds for most of my early adulthood. The only bias I have is towards mayonnaise. I’m dry heaving just looking at the words on the screen. Anyways, so it was with enjoyable delight that Beal Parmigiana and 40-burgers were on the menu last night. Mmm Mmmm good. Delicioso.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 41 12 7 2 0 5 6/11 15/26 5/7

Bradley Beal played 46 minutes and sliced and diced the Thunder D like a Benihana chef. Who cares that the Wizards lost 112-121? Outside of the thousands? millions? that root for the team. Oh, and the folk that layed or took the 5 points. All this talk of burgers and parmigianas is getting me hungry. Enjoy the Top 40 production from Beal while I dig into my pasta with tomato sauce. Slllllllluuuuuuurrrrp.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

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Rudy has been hard at work in the lab. His latest creation? DAILY LINEUPS PAGE. So good. So smooth. So helpful. He decided to go with the Sonny Bono red tint, while I prefer the blue tint. What say you?

Russell Westbrook:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
46 6 6 2 0 6 1/3 19/29 7/10

Another 40-burger! The menu was fantabulous last night.

Zach Randolph:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 10 10 1 0 1 1 0 5/13 0

Got the start at power forward and played 28 minutes. Can score and rebound, but won’t contribute any periphery stats. Also, he’s going to sit every so often and will only get around 25 minutes of run when he does play. Should be a lottery pick when he joins the YMCA circuit. Until then, contemplate why he’s even getting run for the Kings.

Willie Cauley-Stein:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
9 4 3 2 2 1 0 3/8 3/7

Got Mt. Whitesided.

De’Aaron Fox:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 14 3 4 1 0 2 0/1 6/15 2/3

Played 30 minutes and did this….

For. The. Win. Outside of the constipation issues that forced him out of the last game after 11 minutes, Fox has been getting consistent minutes in the low-30s. He should continue to get plenty of run for the remainder of the season.

Now, for my favorite segment for the Kings: The Vivek/Vlade Trading Places bet.

Bogdan Bogdanovic (Vlade’s boy):

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 11 3 3 0 1 1 1/2 5/10 0

Buddy Hield (Vivek’s buddy):

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
24 5 1 0 0 2 4/7 10/15 0

I believe that’s two in a row for the American. USA!!! USA!!! USA!!!

Skal Labissiere:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
0 3 1 0 1 1 0 0/2 0

Only played 18 minutes. What are the Kings doing? One half of the brain wants to go young, while the other side wants to go with vets. Maybe there is no brain at all! It all ties into the Vivek vs Vlade dynamic.

Hassan Whiteside:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 8 13 1 1 1 2 0 3/10 2/2

Did not want to win Cauley-Stein’s money.

Goran Dragic returned to action after missing two games and played 31 minutes.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 23 3 1 1 0 3 3/5 8/14 4/4

Dragic has been somewhat of a disappointment for fantasy. The points, assists, and steals are all down from last year. Outside of the Top 100 for fantasy.

Josh Richardson:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 6 7 5 3 0 1 0/5 2/13 2/3

My son. I think one of the reasons why I love JRich so much is because he reminds me so much of my own hoops game. Slash. Pass. Willing to do it all. Just can’t shoot consistently.

Wayne Ellington:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
20 4 0 1 0 2 6/13 7/16 0

Threeeeeeee-cola!

Even when Tyler Johnson returns, Ellington will still continue to produce due to Dion Waiters being out for the year. Since the beginning of the new year, Ellington is averaging close to 10 3s per game.

Markieff Morris:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 20 9 0 2 1 3 2/3 7/12 4/5

Played 38 minutes. Markieff Morris is magnificently MEH.

John Wall:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 21 1 12 2 1 5 5/10 7/16 2/2

Let’s see. Shot attempts are down. Shooting percentage is down. Free throw percentage is down. Rebounds are down. Assists are down. Steals are down. Points are down. Down is usually bad, unless your lover heads there. Makes sense that Wall is the 65th player in fantasy right now. Is this when the regression talk happens?

Carmelo Anthony:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 13 8 1 1 0 1 1/3 4/11 4/4

Holy shit balls. An assist. What’s more surprising? A dime from Melo or Willie Hernangomez getting playing time?

Terrance Ferguson:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
11 2 0 0 0 0 3/6 4/8 0

Played 25 minutes. Has been given around 22 minutes of run since the start of the new year. He’s a freakishly athletic 3 & D player. Wouldn’t surprise me if he won a dunk contest in the future. With that said, no boards or dimes. A true specialist.

Paul George:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 18 2 4 4 0 4 2/9 6/19 4/4

Many thought George would come out in a vindictive mood and murder the Wizards after getting snubbed for the All-Star game. That would’ve messed with the PG-13 rating.

Kristaps Porzingis:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 21 7 0 0 1 1 1/4 7/16 6/6

Returned after missing a game and played 27 minutes. I clown on Melo for not dishing any dimes, but he has 18 more than Kriselfish.

Michael Beasley:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
21 4 0 2 0 1 1/1 6/8 8/10

Played 29 minutes. Beasley reminds me of the blind cave salamander. No matter the circumstance, he will find a way to get buckets.

With Tim Hardaway Jr. a late scratch, Ron Baker got the start and played 12 minutes.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
0 2 1 0 1 1 0 0 0

Still don’t understand why the Knicks have such a hard on for Baker. Everytime I see him play, I’m like…

Trey Burke:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
18 2 11 0 0 0 0/2 8/12 2/2

Played 29 minutes. Probably got some extra run due to no THJ, but his emergence is particularly troubling for my Frenchise love. I probably must bid adieu. I mean, Ron Mother F’ing Baker is starting and playing 12 minutes.

Willie Hernangomez:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 9 2 0 0 0 2 0 4/5 1/2

No holy shit balls this time. The Knicks literally have no one else to play at center. Kyle O’Quinn out. Joakim Noah out. There’s talk of Willie getting Free with a trade. The only problem is what team is trading for an offensive center that can’t shoot from downtown or play D?

Nikola Jokic:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
18 7 10 0 0 1 1/2 5/9 7/9

So good. 1.2 3s, 10.4 boards, 5 dimes, 1.3 steals, 0.8 blocks, and excellent percentages. He is going to be such a monster in the coming years once he gets the shot attempts over 15 and averages over 20 points. Imagine if he gets the blocks to over 1. No Jokic.

Trey Lyles:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 21 5 3 0 0 0 2/4 9/12 1/1

Uno. Dos. Trey. How is this guy not starting and getting only 22 minutes of run? Malone is loco.

Taj Gibson:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 12 10 1 1 1 1 0 6/13 0

It’s been a while since we visited the Taj Majal. Is 24th in double-dubs on the year.

With Jimmy Butler sitting again, Nemanja Bjelica got the start and played 37 minutes.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
11 6 3 2 0 0 3/5 4/8 0

The Nemanja was decent last night. Of better quality than from the night before.

Karl-Anthony Towns:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 31 11 5 0 0 2 1/5 13/24 4/6

Yes! KAT listened to me and got some more dog in him. Don’t let Andrew get Wiggy Wiggy Wiggins on you.

Jamal Crawford:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 21 3 5 0 0 1 1/4 9/16 2/2

A no doubt Top 3 pick for the YMCA circuit.

Kevin Durant went and messed around last night.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 28 10 11 2 3 4 6/9 10/19 2/2