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Oh man, not a fun night for Mark Cuban unless he’s also invested in the Dallas area sports medicine clinics.  The way the NBA has gone this year, it’d be a smart investment!

First into the Shark Tank was Tyson Chandler, who sprained his ankle a minute and half in and couldn’t return.  He had an earlier ankle sprain and it didn’t cost him any time, so even though it looked bad, ol’ Tyson is no Chicken.  Then a mere couple minutes later, Monta Ellis hurt his hip and only played 3 and a half minutes.  As Kevin tells us in The Office – “That’s Dallas!”  Man, good thing the All-Star Break is right around the corner!  Even if both guys say they’re 100%, I see no reason why the Mavs would push em for their game tomorrow night hosting the Jazz.  While they’re out, we’re a bunch of preying sharks circling the bloody waters like Mr. Wonderful and Herjavec!  And last night it was the hairless ghost (wait, ghosts usually don’t have hair right?) of Charlie Villanueva who piled up some junky stats hitting 9-13 from the field for 26/5/1 with 5 treys.  Was awful other than points and treys with 3-6 FT and 4 TO.  Big man ThrAGNOF!  But for me, the big winner for tomorrow night is Mark Cuban’s own (seriously, kinda seems like he’s his dadShawn Marion comp?) Al-Farouq Aminu.  Only 19 minutes last night, but hit all the cats for 5/6/1/1/1.  Mark Cuban Jr. is only owned in 10% of Yahoo leagues, and in a shortened week where every steal and block will count, he should be one of your first calls on the wire in what should be a spot-start.  Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:

Tim Duncan – Who else would have the best Spurs game in Pops’ 1000th win?!  15/8/2/1/5, and has to be like, worth 900 of those.

Danny Green Owning the glass!  Both with his rebounds last night (12) and 3-pointers that are bricking off em (1-8).  He’s been colder than Pops’ ice stares out there!  The pendulum should swing back for another hot spell so I might buy where I can.

David West – 18 rebounds!  He’s returned to being a beast!  Oh wait, another big man goes nuts against the Spurs…

Tim Frazier – And down goes Frazier!  7 TO and if you streamed in a shallower league, I think you can let it go Frozen style.  Did hit the popcorn stats hard with a 10/6/7 line and to his credit, a tough matchup against Stephen Curry.  For deepers/maybe 12ers desperately needing PG depth, I do think he gets decent minutes post-ASB when Michael Carter-Williams is back.

Tobias Harris Ugh, right when he was on a roll he pulls a Wounded Knee.  Eesh, I was gonna make a joke there but just read about what that was…  This just got way too serious too fast!  Revert back to Arrested Development jokes, stat!  “I’m afraid I just blue myself…”

Elfrid Payton Was about the only bright spot for the Magic last night for 11/5/5 with 6 shiny steals.  In a shortened week, Elfrid might’ve gone ahead and put a steals win on your shelfrid.

Marcin Gortat – Feels like forever that it’s been anything positive!  14/14/3/0/1 hitting 5-6 from the field and all 4 FT.  The ten foot pole is finally growing to that ten feet again!  Took Viagra.

John Wall Tripdub alert!  One missed FT away with a 9/10/10/1/1 line.  Wall is a friggin’ trooper playing through ankle sprains, migraines, a missing arm, no spleen… ASB coming at the right time!

Rasual Butler – Well Garrett Temple got the start with Bradley Beal out with a bad toe, but it was all business as Rasual for 15 Pts and 3 treys.  Did nothing else of value, but if Beal is out one more and you need some deep ThrAGNOFfing, it’s not un-Rasual!

Hassan Whiteside Yeah, didn’t look himself out there, playing a tad slow on his kankle and racking up 4 fouls in 19 minutes.  That said, still 8/9 with 2 blocks making 3-4 FG!   Better than most of Gortat’s 2015!

Chris Bosh – Hated on the Knicks harder than their owner!  I’m pretty sure he yelled at whomever showed up that they should be Nets fans too…  32/2/6/1/0 hitting 12-23 FG (4-6 3PTM 4-5 FT), but even with only 19 minutes of Whiteside, only the two boards and no blocks = the downside.

Mario Chalmers – Well, it only took, like, a million games to finally have another good one with Dwyane Wade out.  18/5/6/3/0, but… twas the Knicks.  And that terrible D from that schlub Jose Calderon.

Langston Galloway – Is he the Knicks best rebounder?!  10/9/1/0/1 with a trey, in a line that reminds you of a semi-boring but useful stretch 4.  Eh, steals should be there most of the time.

Anthony Davis As expected, he sat with his shoulder issue, but you wouldn’t know it in the box score!  The Pels still got an unreal 17 blocks!  Well, they got a 0 in the most important cat – wins – so there’s that…

Eric Gordon Sheesh, this will never end!  One of the weirder breakouts – sure some circumstances and injuries have helped – but a monster 31/3/3/2/0 last night hitting 7-8 from downtown.  Heat check!  That said, 6 TO and a 10:10 AST:TO ratio the past three after an assists anomaly (alliteration, yay!).  If there was ever a selling game, it was this one!

Tyreke Evans – It’s getting kinda crazy how many dimebags he’s racked up lately!  Kinda like Johnny Depp in the first half of Blow.  10+ dimes in 6 of the past 9 games, going 18/7/10/1/1 last night.

Toney Douglas The extra E from Toney is back into the deep league discussion, getting 25 minutes last night for 8/5/2/1/2 and hitting a trey.  Hey, the Pels are playing without a true PG, so the deepest of leagues could use a little of that extra E!

Trey Burke He had an Exum-sism and the terrible Jazz PG switched bodies!  0-10 for Burke with only 2 dimes, while Dante Exum hit 3-11 and had 5 assists.  Like that chorus from Tomato, To-maht-o (or however the hell you spell that, I ain’t googling that crap), “let’s call the whole thing off!”

Elijah Millsap – Rainbow alert! Mr. Fundamental Joe Ingles sat out with back spasms, so Millsap got 36 minutes for 2/7/2/4/2, but hitting only 1-8 from the field.  This was Ingles’ second game out, so if he misses tomorrow as well, Millsap could be streamable for some D stats in D-pers.

Giannis Antetokounmpo Whoa, the alphabet going all 26 on this one!  12/9/8/3/1.  Get me to this Greek!

Khris Middleton In a game where my lover Brandon Knight struggled, The Duchess continued his stellar play for 18/4/1/4/1 with no TO and hit 9-15.  Get me to this Duchess!

John Henson – Wow, started over Zaza Pachulia!  Has the corner been turned?!  Do the Bucks only “strongly dislike” Henson and no longer hate him?!  10/6/0/0/2 for the Muppet, and while I sure hope it’s a trend, it was Zaza’s first game back in a little while so it could be one of those quantitative easing sorta things…  Hey, I paid a little attention in business school!

Jarrett Jack – Was the only Net to show up, which made James Dolan’s jaded Knicks fans happy!  26/4/8 hitting 10-15 FG (4-5 3PTM 2-2 FT).  Look at all those 3s Slim!  But no steals… We’ll call it a wash.

Ricky Rubio Rough game from my Latin boyfriend (gotta keep playing the field!), going 8/1/5/2/0 with 4 TO.  That said, man is Jeff Teague a pest on defense!  I haven’t seen too too much of the Hawks, but his defensive intensity was unreal.  Dare I say, PBev quality.

Shabazz Muhammad – Welcome back, Shabazz!  18/8/0/0/0 taking 14 shots in only 24 minutes.  Only 3-6 from the FT line as well, with 3 TO.  All-in-all, not too great a line, but loving the run.

Gorgui Dieng Talk about happy seeing the run!  6/12/3/1/5 with no TO.  While I’ve been adamantly on the Dieng Train…  Choo choo!  It’s leaving the station…  Last night was great and all, but it was a back-to-back and Flip kept Nikola Pekovic to only 24 minutes.  It’s another frontcourt shituation like the Jazz – I wish the boring guy would be sat to let the better young guy be unleashed – but with the exception of back-to-backs and maybe late in the year when the Wolves play only young guys, Dieng isn’t a must own in all leagues.

DeMarre Carroll – He should be the real Run-DMC!  26/4/0/3/0 hitting 9-13 FG (2-3 3PTM 6-6 FT).  The Hawks are so friggin’ good…

DeAndre Jordan The Goromotaro strikes again!  I said last week I thought Whiteside would get the next one, mostly because I didn’t think Jordan would score 20 too often…  But then Chandler gets hurt and DJ goes 22/27/0/1/3.  And needed 6-9 from the stripe to make it!  Easily could’ve seen him go 3-9 FT and miss the Goro…

Spencer Hawes – Well friggin’ A, so much for that!  Samuari Spence for only 4/1/1/0/0 in a measly 14 minutes.  When Tyson got hurt, the Mavs were more-or-less forced to go small, so the Clips did as well.

J.J. Barea – Still criminally unowned – out there in 93% of leagues.  15/2/7 last night, hitting 6-10 from the field including a trey.  Especially with all the injuries, Barea is going to get run tomorrow and Devin Harris should see an uptick as well.

Kevin Durant Like a virgin on their wedding night, you gotta ask “was it worth the wait?!”  40/4/2/1/0 hitting 13-19 from the field with 7 treys.  Will win KD owners a lot of their weeks this time out!

Mitch McGary – Back to back dubdubs!   17/10/0/0/1 last night, and can hit his freebies going 5-6.  Not bad for a deep league big!  Steven Adams is out at least 3 weeks with surgery on his hand, and Kendrick Perkins is terrible.  I hope he’s not reading, I mean, ummmm, I mean – –  please don’t headbutt me!

Jusuf Nurkic The Jamba Jus has been unleashed!  Got 34 minutes out of nowhere for a not-out-of-nowhere 16/14/2/2/1.  Give him the run, Shaw, ya see!  Hit 6-10 FG and 4-6 FT and showed us his bright upside.

 

Streamers/Cheap Daily League Picks:

Ed Davis (24% owned) – Big Ed has been, well, big in the 3 games since Jordan Hill has been out, averaging 9.0/11.7/2.3/0.7/1.7 in that span.  He continues to outplay the scrubs starting ahead of him, so he should be a solid big man stream tonight.

Marvin Williams (4% owned) – Just a hunch!  With Michael Kidd-Gilchrist being out most of the past 2 games, Williams has had decent enough outings, and hit what should’ve been the game-winning trey Sunday night against the Pacers.  Sure he doesn’t fit too well as a stretch 4 when Greg Monroe and Andre Drummond are on the court together, but I could see Marvin playing some 3 and get the 4 minutes when only one of those big men is out there.

 

I hope everyone had a solid start to their week, and we’ll see you back here tomorrow Razzball Nation!