Isn’t it nice when everything falls into place?  Like when you drive home from work and catch nothing but green lights all the way.  I’m not sure what you call that feeling.  I say I’m not sure, not because I can’t use a thesaurus, but because I don’t have those kinds of days anymore.  I’m sorry to sound all doom and gloom but at this time of year, when I’m dropping one of my favorite players from my fantasy team – one that I followed for every game – I can’t help but react negatively.  I know it’s not his fault, or the team, or even the ghost of David Stern.  What, he’s not dead?  If you say so.  Really there isn’t any fault at all, besides the ghost obviously, I just needed more games or I’m not going to win my semifinals match-up.  So if you are like me and you’re barely holding onto your last breath of hope in the semis here’s a handful of widely available players to get that last couple of points, or boards, or just whatever it’s going to take stay alive and play for the championship:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there’ll be ThrAGNOF!  Full disclosure – I had to look up this song from that movie about a weird looking ginger chick and it’s about coming of age or something.  No, not Teeth!  Last night, an injury-ravaged, de-taloned Pelicans went out and shocked the Clippers.  Kevin Hart, apparently a big Clippers fan, got to travel with LA on a Ride Along I’m guessing.  When Jamal Crawford upchucked a three at the buzzer for the win, that arced so high it might’ve hit the Cowboys Stadium scoreboard, Hart started crying when it barely hit rim and got angrier than his little cameo in The 40-Year-Old Virgin.  Anyway – Anthony Morrow was a big factor in the upset win, going full-ThrAGNOF 27/5/0/0/1 with two treys.  Scoring is the name of his game!  Always a high-volume shooter, Morrow just has never stuck in a big role as he doesn’t do anything else.  Dude, if he was on a D’Antoni Lakers team, he might break the NBA!  With Brian Roberts with a bruised knee, Eric Gordon with an absence of knees, and Austin Rivers with the sniffies, the Pels were without three of their bigger remaining scorers.  Looking ahead to tomorrow, the Pelicans get a beignet of a matchup against the former New Orleans Jazz and all three could miss again.  So if you need some treys and a little scoring upside in the deeper leagues, it’s that time of year when the scrubs will come out tomorrow!  Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

In case you haven’t noticed I’ll go ahead and state the obvious, I don’t like to lose.  What’s that?  You don’t either?  Good, because it’s that time of year once again when we find out just what lengths we’ll go to to insure an early playoff victory.  Can you drop a player who’s been one of your most productive for months?  It’s easy when they’re injured but when you start to see your season about to end can you let the better player walk to gamble on a player with more games?  I can’t make that life altering decision for you but I can offer you a few words of counsel.

First, I ask that you confess your most shameful of fantasy sins, not to me but to yourself.  If you drafted Tristan Thompson and ignored all the warnings then you need to first come to grips with that before you can proceed.  This will be the internal struggle that not until you have accepted will you truly find peace.  Secondly, you must accept that none of us can do this little thing called life, or fantasy basketball, all by ourselves.  There was once and still are people there to guide me and as I write I pass this knowledge on to you.  I know one day you will continue this circle of life and pass the knowledge on to the next generation of fake basketballers.  And third, only you can make the decision to turn your life, or roster, over with this new found knowledge.  In other words, if you post your login/password below I will not make the move for you.  Now my apprentice go forth with this knowledge of weekend streamers and bring us back word of your glorious victory.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Wow.  Last night was rocky.  For a lot of people.  Hopefully your playoff teams came out of the better end!  Lots of guys with minor injuries were forced to sit, and within only minutes of each other Nikola Vucevic and Josh Smith got ejected in different games.  Pretty much like the wild west out there!  Next thing you know, I’m quoting Will Smith from that god forsaken movie… “Let me kindly stand up!”  Probably the biggest benefactor in what will be dubbed “DNP-Day” was Aaron Brooks, who started for Ty Lawson who had “illness”.  Wow, that sounds ominous.  Brooks went all 2009 on us, and posted a redonk 27/6/17 line.  Dude, if you played in a daily league or if you were streaming Brooks for the dimes, you just got a major sign from the fantasy gods.  “You, my son, are blessed with stats that overfloweth!”  Distribute some to us less fortunate ones!  The Nugs play again on Friday, and it’s tough to say what Lawson’s status will be by then.  Ricky Rubio went bonkers on the Mavs last night (more below), so if Brooks does get the start – cue the Pavlovian salivating.  Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops action (and if you get here early enough, be sure to sign up for the Razzball NCAA Bracket pool with a fun prize to the winner!):

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Before this playoff roster post gets too out of control I have a few things to say that will hopefully help to put things into perspective.  Like how this is based off of daily roster changes, 9-cat, H2H, you know, like the RCLs.  First off, everyone’s playoff needs are entirely dependent on the makeup of their roster.  It should be noted that this isn’t just about maximizing games, it’s also about helping to make up for our deficiencies.  For example, If I had Chris Paul on my team then I’m only going to get 2 games in the first round.  If I want to win let’s say assists,  then I need to stream accordingly.  Second, I’m going to use the saying, “heavy day”.  While trying my hardest to avoid the feminine hygiene jokes I will be referring to whether or not that days NBA schedule has a lot of teams playing or just a few.  This is important because on most heavy days you usually won’t need to stream a player or you may have a player you won’t get much from.  For instance Boston plays Mon, Wed, Fri next week and Wed, Fri, Sun the following week.  Wed and Fri are always heavy days and depending on the rest of your roster you may only get 1 game each week from say… Jerryd Bayless.  That would make him just about useless.  Third, I’m going to use 3-letter abbreviations for teams and days of the week.  Otherwise this would get far too unwieldy to read and I would have to learn how to spell all of those cities.  That’s not going to happen, isn’t learning the names of players enough?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

- – do this anymore!!!!  And that’s appropriate too because when you run out of the Air Canada Centre, it turns from solid ground to ice!  Both Kyle Lowry and Terrence Ross won’t be frantically chasing down kids any time soon with ankle injuries last night.  Lowry still finished out the OTs, but coach Casey said it was a bad booboo.  He’s had a ton of injury problems through his career, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he misses at least a couple.  We’ll see after it gets re-evaluated today.  Then Ross’ sounds worse, happening in the 2nd quarter and he wasn’t able to get back in.  Ross can’t!  Stepped on a foot and it rolled.  Those are never fun.  Did shoot his freebies and walk off under his own power, so there’s that.  In shallow leagues, if Ross was giving you some points you sorely needed you can hold out maybe a game, but he’s probably streamable.  The main takeaway is Greivis Vasquez chose the perfect game to get hot, scoring a season-high 26 for a 26/2/8/2/0 line with 4 treys which is muy bueno.  Did have 6 TOs which is muy mal.  With the Raptors possibly missing both Lowry and Ross Sunday against Golden State, un opporunidad is there for Vasquez to have a major stream-tastic outing.  You can sneak in Pts/3s/Asts/Stls and when you win, you’re opponent is gonna be like, “clever girl!”  Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA hoops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I can’t for the life of me remember why we went to Walmart on a Sunday.  It was probably for something pretty important but me and JB can get sidetracked pretty easily.  Anyway, I don’t want to be there any longer than necessary so when we go I insist we shop by the method we have fondly been calling The Heely Derby.  It’s just like the 80′s style Roller Derby, daisy dukes and all, only with Heelys instead of roller skates so we are slightly less conspicuous.  I remember it was early in the race, we were gaining speed still, weaving around the blockers when out of nowhere I was caught with a forearm shiver that sent me flying.  When I was able to finally free myself from the shirt rack and locate my adversary I was astounded by what I saw.  She couldn’t have been more than 8 years old, decked out in Hello Kitty paraphernalia and still locked in her Kung Fu like pose.  Even in my shock I could tell something was wrong.  Her kitty doll which no doubt was her most prized possession had been knocked to the ground.  Still locked in her pose she slowly turned her head toward me and calmly demanded, “Say you’re sorry”.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I might be making this up, but doesn’t Denver play the Flavor Flav “Yeah Boy!” when Randy Foye hits a three?  Well I hope they do!  After a brutal Super Bowl for the Broncos (and America), the Denver populous got some slight redemption with Foye hitting this buzzer-beater last night.  Sportscenter!  But even with that game-winner, Foye had a rainbow flirt of 14/7/4/1/2.  That’s not ThrAGNOF!  Even with Ty Lawson back, Foye is rackin’ up multi-cat!?  I haven’t been a big Foye fan for shallower leagues this year – I thought he was constantly overvalued – but getting 16 dimes in his previous game then a nice all-around line last night with Ty-Ty back; I think I’m a little more a believer.  Sure it’s only one game against a fast-paced Clippers team, but 40+ minutes yet again last night and now in three straight games and Foye is looking pretty locked in for good value right now.  Owned in 57% of Yahoo leagues seems a little thin.  Show ya Foye a little Flavor of Love.  Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Super Bowl Sunday was a fail across the board.  Joe Namath messed up the coin toss.  The Red Hot Chili Peppers refuse to wear shirts.  The Broncos refused to play football.  And the only game we got on the NBA slate to rival the Super Fail was the Magic against the Celtics.  A combined 28-68 record heading into the game, but hey, at least no one was wearing this coat!  Russell Westbrook now has a wardrobe to makeover… Anywho, it was an electric 27 minutes for Rajon Rondo, who had his best game since returning.  9-11 from the field for a 19/6/10/3/0 slash can get anyone rolling.  Well, except maybe the Broncos offense… Hopefully Rondo won a few people their matchups this week and their Sundays weren’t ruined by all that food and beer turning into absolute lethargy like I’m feeling right now.  But alas we have fantasy’s best sport to pull us through the soul-sucking quicksand that was the Super Bowl as we grow nearer and nearer the playoffs.  Here’s what else I saw this weekend in NBA action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Man, that title seems all sorts of wrong… But what is right is Nikola Vucevic returned to action last night For a solid 16/10 dub-dub in only 20 minutes.  Efficiency!  Shot 6-12, 4-4 from the stripe and added a few steals.  Very encouraging return for a guy people were dismissing since he had no timetable from the concussion.  Concussions can really jack ya up, but hopefully you stayed true on your course to the playoffs and have a dynamic top-20ish big man.  Of course the Magic now have lost value in other places, with Big Baby going 5/4/4 in 32 minutes, Arron Afflalo looking like the scrub I’ve said he was all year (still think his 20+ PPG is one of the most preposterous stats this year) and Tobias Harris temporarily moving to the bench.  Although T Dawg isn’t Walking Dead (going 9/11/3/1/1 in 37 minutes), he shot like a stiff going 2-8.  Afflalo is still a sell as soon as you can, Davis a drop, and hope you bought low on Vuc while there was a window open.    Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?