In general I think it’s a good idea to say, “Spoiler Alert: Plot Climax”, but I don’t need to do that when talking about the new Godzilla movie because I haven’t seen it.  It’s not the plot I take offense to anyway, I’m disappointed in the choice of lead monster.  With today’s CGI the giant, furry, and oh so cute Mothra could still wreck havoc on the city but unlike Godzilla he would also sell millions of soft, fuzzy pillows to little boys and girls everywhere.  I’ve already mailed my script to Disney so don’t go trying to steal my ideas.  And what about King Ghidorah, the three-headed dragon monstrosity?  If I had to put down a few bucks between him and Godzilla then I’m taking King Ghidorah.  Sure Godzilla has his strengths with the loud roar and all but he doesn’t fly.  So while Godzilla is flailing his little T-Rex arms and squawking like a pissed off parrot, the King can leisurely glide around and deliver deadly destruction whenever he so pleases.

Godzilla is a tried and true brand so he makes the most sense but I don’t think that makes him the right choice.  In a Russell Westbrook vs John Wall debate you would probably assume Westbrook makes the most sense too – but I’m not so sure.  Actually I am sure, if you remember last time out I told you I was going into these comparisons with a predetermined winner.  So before we get started I’m going to go ahead and put a few bucks down on John Wall.  It would be a much easier debate if he could fly, but either way he’s still going to be a summer, I mean winter blockbuster.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Razzball Hoops Nation!  Wow, typing 2014-15 already just feels weird…  I’m not ready to quit you 2013-14!  Although, the disappointing image of the face of the Luminescent Lithuanian makes it easy.  We’re done, ya ho!  I’m just not that into you…

As I do every season during the NBA Playoffs, I think it’s a fun way to kick off the year with some way too early rankings through the top 50.  “Wait a minute, isn’t there free agency and a draft, moron!?”  Shut it, noob commenter!  There will obviously be numerous changes to these early ranks, possibly even some rookies trickling into the bottom end of the top 50, and all sorts of free agency moves to make this a really fun offseason.  Here’s my way too early Top 20 for the 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Season (spoiler alert: no Jonas Valanciunas):

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Razzball Hoops Nation!  It’s officially the offseason!  Well for fantasy…  And for the Knicks and the Lakers.  And the Pacers!  Haha, sorry matt, just joshin’…

And what better way to look back on the 2013-14 season than to reflect on the rankings.  Those who don’t learn from the past are doomed to repeat it!  Dammit, that means I can’t ever rank Ricky Rubio highly again even though I know I’ll want to!

So I reflected back on my ranks, and patted myself on the back or immolated myself on what I was thinking so long ago.  Rankings are based on my final updated top 200 and eesh!  Looking back on these some are rough!  I then compared them to the FantasyPros aggregate Draft Day Rankings along with Basketball Monster’s Total Value for 9-cat leagues for the season.  I had Slim come in and grade each of my picks, and man, he’s a harsh grader!  And unfortunately he doesn’t take too kindly to giant pasty men flashing their teetans at him either, so I got no extra help. Here’s a look back at the Top 20 for the 2013-14 Fantasy Basketball Season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Razzball Nation!  Hopefully you’re hopping over here to boast your hardware.  To flaunt your gold.  To show us all your bigger red ass to display your dominance over us weakling chimps!  Most H2H leagues wrapped up last night, and I had a brutal year.  Multi-titles last year, not a one this time out.  But hey!  It’s been a fun season, and we’ve still got a few weeks left for other H2Hers and Roto players.  So we’ll be here!  And we’ve got a fun championship edition week coming at ya, with Slim’s REL acceptance speech along with Wednesday’s RCL Championship crowning.  Speaking of crowning, somebody get Aaron Brooks the iron throne (I thought about making a birthing joke instead, but that’s gross)!  Dude has been owning Westeros (I think that’s right, it’s hard to keep up with all the kingdoms when you haven’t read the books!), getting his second straight 40+ minute outing and blowing up for 24/8/15/3/0.  As I mentioned in the comments at some point last week, Brooks against the Rockets with no Patrick Beverley checking him was going to be saucy.  Then Ty Lawson had to sit on top of it!  Wow, that sentence comes off weird as a standalone…  Brooks looks to be an immediate add with Brian Shaw quoted that he’s not rushing Lawson back.  As well he shouldn’t, captain obvious!  Try and snatch up Brooks if you still can and ride him while Lawson sits on it, apparently.  Hah!  Here’s what else I saw over the weekend:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Can I has Triple Doublez? Man watching Kevin Love is fun.  I think he should enter the NFL draft.  Deep outlets like these, plus he’s almost 7 feet and would never get a pass deflected at the line!  I can just picture Kevin Costner and Denis Leary debating over it with the Browns first round pick.  “I’m not taking some bearded seven foot douchebag when I’ve got Johnny Football and a bottle of Johnnie Walker Green!”  Eh, was going for a Leary-ism there, it’s hard to type it…  Huge night for Love, going 24/16/10/1/1 with two treys and continually adding millions to his next contract.  All after a report a few days ago that he was “exhausted” after a couple of non-Love-ish games.  Unloved games?  Something like that.  He’ll be one of the biggest stories to follow in the offseason, but he’s pretty much a shoe-in top-5 pick.  In Basketball Monster, he’s #3 in overall value and #4 per game.  He’s stayed durable and has been beastly.  Godly.  I kinda wanna get a Love bobblehead and put it in my locker and serve him rum.  Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s been a year long punching bag.  Larry Drew sucks, he has no idea how to grow a young team, and because he plays guys different minutes every night the Bucks are atrocious and have no cohesion.  But that’s nothing new, as he was awarded the first Razzball Worst NBA Coach Razzie.  It’d be a wonder if he could do anything right!  Yesterday, I said Ramon Sessions might be the best player on that team (and he got a ridiculous 20 minutes to show for it Sunday), and Larry Screw actually paid attention to my advice!  Sessions started last night against the Clips, played 44 minutes, making the most of it.  Shot a ridiculous 13-21 (2-3 3PTM) for 28/6/7.  While this game was nice, and I maintain he’s probably the best fantasy asset on the Bucks right now, he’s not necessarily the best pickup.  The Bucks have only two more games this week, Thursday against the Lakers (which you obviously love) then Sunday against the Heat (not so much).  Plus it’s the Bucks and we all know how Larry Screwballs can jack things up.  I picked him up in one league just to lock down that Thursday game since it’s a light slate with only four games.  If you can afford to do that, Sessions is your man.  Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Wow.  Last night was rocky.  For a lot of people.  Hopefully your playoff teams came out of the better end!  Lots of guys with minor injuries were forced to sit, and within only minutes of each other Nikola Vucevic and Josh Smith got ejected in different games.  Pretty much like the wild west out there!  Next thing you know, I’m quoting Will Smith from that god forsaken movie… “Let me kindly stand up!”  Probably the biggest benefactor in what will be dubbed “DNP-Day” was Aaron Brooks, who started for Ty Lawson who had “illness”.  Wow, that sounds ominous.  Brooks went all 2009 on us, and posted a redonk 27/6/17 line.  Dude, if you played in a daily league or if you were streaming Brooks for the dimes, you just got a major sign from the fantasy gods.  “You, my son, are blessed with stats that overfloweth!”  Distribute some to us less fortunate ones!  The Nugs play again on Friday, and it’s tough to say what Lawson’s status will be by then.  Ricky Rubio went bonkers on the Mavs last night (more below), so if Brooks does get the start – cue the Pavlovian salivating.  Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops action (and if you get here early enough, be sure to sign up for the Razzball NCAA Bracket pool with a fun prize to the winner!):

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ohhhhh, fringe-fantasy worthy Duke players…  I’m not a fan!  Belle Knox isn’t a fan!  Is she fringe-fantasy worth?  Plausibly.  Whilst you search her in Incognito mode, Kyle Singer went all multi-cat in a near-rainbow explosion for 11/7/3/5/1.  He even stole DeMarcus Cousins‘ parking spot!  Fight, fight!  While I’m not necessarily the biggest Singler fan (which I’m sure you can ascertain by the title and if you’ve read all year), he does have something going for him that all Lakers and Bucks would give their left nut for.  Consistent minutes.  After the All-Star break, Singler is averaging 34 minutes a game.  And hey, he needs every single[r] one of them to stay fantasy relevant.  Burn!  But relevant indeed, as his slash in that time is 11.7/3.1/1.6/1.1/0.6.  Not setting the world on fire, but for your fringe-guys – especially in weekly leagues – giving you a little of something is better than a lot of nothing.  Award winning advice right there!  Along with the multi-cat, is at 1.5 treys and 82% FT shooting since the break.  Dibbling in this, dabbling in that, and next thing you know he’s someone you trust more than, I dunno, maybe even Brandon Jennings who couldn’t find the hole last night.  “Tie in a joke from the beginning, tie in a joke from the beginning!”  Shut up 13-year-old inner monologue!  Here’s what else I saw in NBA action from last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Oh man, rough night for matt’s Pacers!  Al Jefferson just went absolutely bonkers, adding to his stretch of bonkertude giving Jefferson owners a huge boost for the playoffs.  Owning Roy Hibbert like an Entertainment 720 entrepreneur, Big Al shot 16-25 in a full multi-cat dance party of 34/8/3/1/1 and even hit a three!  Only his sixth of his career to pepper all the cats.  Over his last 3, Jefferson has hit 44 of 65 shots for a very high volume 67.7 FG%.  Jefferson hasn’t played this well since his Minnesota days, and you can even argue this has been a career year.  Which for a guy with the history Jefferson has put down in the stat sheets is really saying something considering how rocky it all started.  Remember the ankle issue that had him sit a lot of games?  Then the slow start?  Because I sure do, and I steadfastly said “Hold me tighter baby!”  Is that a song?  I feel like there’s something close to that… Anyway, hopefully you were able to buy low or weather the storm and now you’re reaping some big man stats like it’s the 90s.  We miss you David Robinson!  Two losses in a row for the Pacers, right after barely beating the Jazz.  The Heat are now only 1.5 games behind, and might be taking the Pacers piece of the home-court advantage pie!  Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I can’t for the life of me remember why we went to Walmart on a Sunday.  It was probably for something pretty important but me and JB can get sidetracked pretty easily.  Anyway, I don’t want to be there any longer than necessary so when we go I insist we shop by the method we have fondly been calling The Heely Derby.  It’s just like the 80′s style Roller Derby, daisy dukes and all, only with Heelys instead of roller skates so we are slightly less conspicuous.  I remember it was early in the race, we were gaining speed still, weaving around the blockers when out of nowhere I was caught with a forearm shiver that sent me flying.  When I was able to finally free myself from the shirt rack and locate my adversary I was astounded by what I saw.  She couldn’t have been more than 8 years old, decked out in Hello Kitty paraphernalia and still locked in her Kung Fu like pose.  Even in my shock I could tell something was wrong.  Her kitty doll which no doubt was her most prized possession had been knocked to the ground.  Still locked in her pose she slowly turned her head toward me and calmly demanded, “Say you’re sorry”.

Please, blog, may I have some more?