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I’m pretty sure Ivica Zubac doesn’t have a pocket full of rocks. He’s definitely not skinny and likely has never gotten his ass kicked. He was probably doing the ass kicking. He’s not smoking blunts but has made millions without having to cut a quarter ounce. That said, if Zubac wants to continue making millions, he’s gotta keep dealing and ballin’. And ballin’ he did as no one can take Sunday’s game away from young Z:

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Holy schiztnitz. It was a White Man’s World. The only other player who has put up a 30-point, 29-rebound, 3-assist, and 3-block game was Kareem Abdul-Jabbar back in 1978 when he went for 37 points, 30 rebounds, 5 assists, and 6 blocks! As a Lakers fan, it makes me sad that the Lakers traded him away. And to the Clippers no less for Mike Muscala. And by Jerry West, who is the greatest general manager in the history of the game and ended up consulting for the Clippers.

The Clippers, sources said, never even called the Lakers to inquire about Zubac. The Lakers made the offer and the Clippers gladly accepted. Sources said that those at the dinner table shared a hearty laugh at the Lakers’ expense.

Excuse me as I go perform seppuku for the eighth time in my life. I guess I’ll find out soon if I’m a cat or not.

Here’s what else I saw yesterday:

 

Draymond Green

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The Most Interesting Man for hoops had himself a day; popping the points and dishing out dimes. Good thing he’s put the punching dudes in the face behind him. At least for now. So far this season, Green has an efficient field goal percentage of .618. He’s never finished above .556 in his career. It’s on lower volume but still. Maybe the guidance chips were upgraded and recalibrated. <Goes to YouTube, looks at Poole punch> Still needs some tweaks. The blocks and boards are down this season, like the lowest since his sophomore season. Green is still putting up top 100 production, though. Man, looking back at his history, that run from 2014 to 2016 was epic, as he finished 21st, 13th and 21st on a per-game basis for fantasy.

Stephen Curry

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Yawn.

Was falling in drafts….

Curry is the number two player on a per-game basis.

Jonathan Kuminga

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Stop what you’re doing! Go out and grab Kuminga right now! JK. If you are acronym-challenged like myself, JK mean Just Kidding. JK (Jonathan Kuminga) isn’t fantasy relevant now but could be later in the season. Over the last four games, he’s played 40, 14, 13 and 20 minutes. We all know about the freakish athleticism, but he’s getting the trust of the coaching staff and the awareness should improve as he gets more reps.

Donte DiVincenzo

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In 18 mintues off the bench. DiVincenzo missed eight games earlier in the season. The Warriors went 2-6 over that span. Since returning to the lineup, Golden State has a record of 6-3. Coincidence? I think not. DiVincenzo won’t play more than 20 minutes but he does chip in a little something in every cat but blocks. I play in too many deep leagues.

Anthony Edwards

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Edwards to the rest of the Timberwolves….

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Unfortunately, the ship is….

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I kid. Minnesota is 10-10 so all is not lost, but they are still in the process of incorporating Rudy Gobert into the mix at both ends of the court.

Rudy Gobert

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The field goal percentage is down to 63% after being 71% last season, and the rebounds have gone from 14.7 to 12.8. Still, they are both good numbers. The blocks, though, are at 1.4. During his rookie season, Gobert blocked 0.9 per game. Since then, he’s been over 2 in every season! Maybe Gobert should join the French soccer team and become their goalie because this basketball thing doesn’t seem to be working out. I kid I kid. I think the numbers will normalize as Gobert and his teammates are still gelling and figuring each other out.

Jaylen Nowell

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In 24 minutes off the bench. He hadn’t received 20 minutes in the prior seven games with two of those under 10 minutes. Nowell can be the microwave for Minnesota and attempted at least 10 shots in eight of the first nine games. If you need points, he’s someone to keep an eye on if the microwave has been, not only plugged in, but placed on the kitchen counter.

Jalen Smith

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Jalen “The Great Divide” Smith. The range of outcomes for his production makes EKG machines jealous. He’s scored in single-digits seven times this season and the 23 points on Sunday was a season high. He’s grabbed double-digit rebounds in five games but grabbed fewer than five in five contests. He does have five fingers and five toes on each hand and foot, though.

Myles Turner

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Only played 20 minutes due to foul trouble and Zubac giving him some California Love. Zubac didn’t appreciate all those rumors about the Clippers interested in Myles. Zubac did what dogs do when another dog infringes upon territory; pee on them then get buckets.

Tyrese Haliburton

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Haliburton is so good, and I love him so much. He’s 11th in per-game value. Prior to Sunday’s game, he converted at least 50% of his field goal attempts in 10 of 18 games. So impressive for a guard.

Shake Milton

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In 38 minutes. Milton had started four games prior to Sunday and averaged 38.8 minutes, 22.3 points, 7 rebounds, 6.5 assists, 2.5 treys, and 0.8 steals. This production isn’t coming out of nowhere, though. In 38 prior career starts, he’s gone for at least 20 points in 10 of those contests with a high of 39. He’s scored at least 20 points in 18 career games with three over 30. Milton is a professional bucket getter. It’s just all about opportunity for him.

Paul Reed

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In 30 minutes off the bench. In the prior three games with Joel Embiid out, Reed has played 20, 21, and 31 minutes. He’s grabbed plenty of boards and stuffed the cupboard for defensive stats. The third-year Reed has flashed when given the opportunity, yet he rarely gets significant run. I’m beginning to think that Doc isn’t too bright and is the antithesis of having a PhD. Maybe because Reed’s name is so simple and only has four letters in each that Doc assumes that his game is too simple. I don’t know. I’m spitballing here because I don’t understand why Montrezl Harrell is getting over 20 minutes per game.

The Magic lost 133-103 to the 76ers. No blurbs for them! Jalen Suggs was out. Mo Bamba only played 12 minutes due to injury. The most interesting news is that Markelle Fultz could be returning soon. He was questionable for Sunday before eventually being ruled out. There’s tons of unknown with his situation and role but I think he could play in the low-20s early on and provide plenty of dimes.

Jaren Jackson Jr.

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I essentially took JJJ off my board in the offseason. I thought he’d be returning to action much later and would be brought along slowly. I’m a stupid, stupid man. Since coming back, he’s played 25, 25, 28, 22 minutes, and 30 minutes. He’s scored at least 20 points in four straight and blocked 16 shots! Well done to all of you who took a shot and got JJJ at depressed prices.

Ja Morant

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The fifth time Ja has messed around and the first time this season….under the bright lights of MSG. Does that make me giddy? Ja. Do I also have shares of Morant? Ja. Would I still love Morant if I didn’t? Ja.

Julius Randle

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Aaaaaaaaaalmost messed around. Randle has done it 13 times in his career, which is pretty damn impressive. The dimes and field goal attempts predictably decreased with the addition of Jalen Brunson. The efficiency has spiked from 41% to 46%, though. He’s averaging the same amount of points to last season despite attempting 2.4 fewer shots per game.

Mitchell Robinson

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In 32 minutes. Only the second time this season that Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood has been opened for more than 30 minutes. I was getting a little worried after he received only 23, 13, and 17 minutes in the three most recent contests.

Jalen Brunson

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I thought the signing of Brunson by the Knicks was a great move all around. I didn’t think he’d be this good, though. He’s a top 30 player on the season, averaging 21.8 points, 1.4 treys, 6.7 dimes, and 1.1 steals while shooting 48% from the field and 89% from the line. He’s exceeding his draft cost by three rounds.

San Quentin Grimes

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In 26 minutes as a starter. In the three prior games, Grimes played 30, 34, and 32 minutes. He was in the mix for the starting role in the offseason but suffered an injury. He’s back now and has relegated Evan Fournier to the gulag while Immanuel Quickley is supposedly on the block. Grimes is an excellent shooter and plays tough defense, which is the reason I feel confident that he will continue to get playing time. For fantasy, the upside is limited and he’s not exciting due to the low usage rate, but he should get plenty of good looks playing alongside Brunson, Randle, and Barrett. In addition, he does have some playmaking ability and can navigate pick-and-roll action deftly. Grimes has dished out 4, 5, 1, and 8 dimes over the last four games.

Evan Mobley

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In 40 minutes. The usage rate is sub-20% and the free-throw shooting is sub-70%. Yuck. That said, he’s averaging 14.9 points, 8.8 boards, 1 steal, and 1.4 blocks. He’s still only 21 years old. Eric Wong said that he’s the closest thing to KG since KG. I can’t wait to see him develop.

Darius Garland

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Donovan Mitchell

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That feeling when the key fits into the lock. When two pieces fit in Tetris. When the homie says that he’ll be wingman tonight. I had none of those thoughts when I was projecting the Cavaliers in the offseason. I’m a stupid, stupid man. Both are freaking Raptors that can tear heads off but in the ideal situation, Garland is the disher while Mitchell is the net swisher.

Marvin Bagley III

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When Marvin Bagley, Marvin Bagley II, and Marvin Bagley III are all in the same room, are they Marvin, 2, and 3? These are the important questions that need to be addressed. I’ve written this story many times in the past, but I can never spot writing it when I think of 3. In the summer before his rookie season, I watched 3 destroy grown men at the Drew League. I thought he was going to do business in The Association. The common theme of today’s post? Son is a stupid, stupid man. That said, 3 is getting run and providing points, boards, defensive stats, and field goal percentage. He’s a top 70 player and is viable for as long as he gets minutes because minutes are half the battle. Yo, Joe!

Saddiq Bey

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Returned to the starting lineup after missing four games and played 35 minutes. My Bey-B is back. I suddenly have a craving for Baby Back Ribs.

Killian Hayes

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Continues to start and played 33 minutes in this one. Since Hayes entered the starting lineup, he’s scored double-digits only three times but has dished out 45 dimes over eight games. He’s also provided both blocks and steals. Cade Cunningham could be out for the season which could make Killian a potential league winner.

Kevin Knox II

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In 17 minutes. In the prior three games, Knox played 26, 25, and 23 minutes, shooting 4-of-7, 8-of-11, and 6-of-8. There is no gold in this Knox. If his name was Fort, then maybe I’d have some interest.

Alec Burks

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In 25 minutes off the bench. If you are hunting for points, then Burks is a viable option. He hasn’t played more than 25 minutes in any of the nine games since returning to action, but he’s scored at least 15 points in every contest but one.

The Big 3 for Dallas, Luka Doncic, Spencer Dinwiddie, and Christian Wood scored 27, 22, and 21 points respectively. Only one other player scored in double-digits as the Mavericks succumbed to the Bucks, 115-124 in Milwaukee.

Giannis Antetkounmpo

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In only 29 minutes. G has played 672 career games. He’s gone for at least 30 points and 10 rebounds in 133 of those. What a freaking G.

Brook Lopez

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Now children, gather around the fire as Uncle Son tells you a story. At the edge of town, if you turn off the highway onto the dirt road that heads west, it will take you to a place where you will be granted one wish if you are able to throw an object into the pond. Unfortunately, there is a Brook in front of it that swats all projectiles away.

Brook is averaging 2.8 blocks per game, tied for tops in the league with Myles. From a totals perspective, he has a whopping 51 blocks. Nic Claxton is second with 42!

Grayson Allen

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Who is Ted Cruz? | WBEZ Chicago

Jevon Carter

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I’m very curious to see who goes to the bench when Khris Middleton returns. Carter provides the defense and has shown the ability to hit the open J, but Allen is a 40% shooter from downtown. I’d be good with either since whoever stays in the starting lineup will get over 30 minutes of run.

Bradley Beal

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Since returning from injury, Beal has scored 25, 27, 26, 28, and 30 points. Beal is usually marinated and cooked slowly, but this Beal is special in that it cooks others. Beal has scored at least 30 points in 129 of 659 career games.

Jordan Goodwin

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In 24 minutes off the bench. I had concerns that Goodwin would get relegated back to a pumpkin after Monte Morris returned to action. Well, Goodwin played 24 minutes despite Morris returning. Morris only played 24 minutes as the Wizards were likely bringing him back slowly.

Jaylen Brown

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Jayson Tatum did not play due to a sprained ankle. So Sunday was the Brown show and it was not full of poo. Brown had a 38% usage rate as he led the Celtics to a 130-121 victory over the Wizards.

Sam Hauser and Luke Kornet are the greatest duo since Laurel and Hardy. Hauser played 21 minutes and went 3-of-4 from downtown. He’s shooting a robust 47% from downtown this season. Kornet played 22 minutes and contributed 12 points, 4 rebounds, and 2 blocks. That’s what he do. Kornet should continue to get significant run until at least Robert Williams returns.

Caleb Martin

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In 41 minutes! Over the last eight games, Martin has been a top 25 players! He’s averaged 39.6 minutes, 16.3 points, 2.3 treys, 6.3 boards, 2.9 dimes, 1.4 steals, and 1 block while shooting 55% from the field and 82% from the line. The Heat have been experiencing a plethora of injuries, hence the increase in playing time.

Bam Adebayo

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This performance after scoring 38 points on Friday. BAM! This is what I’ve always envisioned from Bam. He’s got it in the bag. I will never forgot that play during the Summer League before his rookie season. He grabbed a rebound, dribbled down the court, then Euro-stepped around a defender for the dunk.

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Then I’d watch USA Basketball King of the Court vids, and Bam would be getting busy. Jimmy Butler hasn’t played in forever so this heater is likely unsustainable. But, but, but….Please let this be a regime change so that Bam morphs into the beautiful butterfly that will flutter points down upon us.

Tyler Herro

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The first time messing around for Herro. Katya Elise is like, “No, no honey. It better not be like that.”

John Collins

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Man, JC owners needed this one in a bad way. He had scored 8 and 7 points in the prior two games. Since putting up 24 and 23 points in the first two contests of the season, JC has scored in single digits seven times and hadn’t hit the 20-point mark until Sunday.

Onyeka Okongwu

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Got the start and played 34 minutes. Okongwu has now made two starts with Clint Capela out due to a dental issue, and the results haven’t been great. On Friday, he put up 4 points, 11 rebounds, 2 assists, 2 blocks, and 2 steals. I was a dummy head in the offseason thinking that Capela and Okongwu would split the playing time and that Okongwu would break out. I’m a stupid, stupid man. I vented about this in the most recent Son Pod so check that out if you want.

Dejounte Murray

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After the blistering start to the season, Murray has been a top 100 player over the last seven games. The steals have unsurprisingly come in but the dimes and field goal percentage have also declined.

Trae Young

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The field goal percentage of 41% on 22.4 shots per game freaking hurts. Trae is providing 89% from the line on 8.7 attempts and is second in the league with 178 dimes on the season. These are all things we knew heading into the season. The level of pain comes down to expectations.

Justise Winslow

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Winslow has started the last three contests with Damian Lillard out and played 37, 47, and 28 minutes. Justise has been served.

Jerami Grant

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In the four games since Damian Lillard has been been, Grant has had a usage rate of 25.1%, 23.5%, 37.8%, and 30.7%. He’s gone for 18, 21, 44, and 29 points over that span. We knew he had it in him when he took his talents to Detroit. We knew the defense was going to be there but the scoring and treys have been a boon.

Royce O’Neale

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Rolls Royce GIFs | Tenor

The points, treys, dimes, and blocks have all increased from his time in Utah. It helps that he’s playing four more minutes per game. That said, the efficiency numbers have subsided but we will take the counting stats. There will be some regression, but as long as he’s playing over 35 minutes a game, he will have plenty of opportunities to provide fantasy goodies.

Kevin Durant

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Number four player on a per-game basis and could finish numero uno….again. 29.3 points, 1.6 treys, 6.6 boards, 5.4 dimes, 0.7 steals, and 1.8 blocks while shooting 53% from the field and 91% from the line. Since 2008, KD has finished 8th, 1st, 1st, 3rd, 1st, 1st, 5th, 2nd, 1st, 3rd, 8th, 8th, and 2nd on a per-game basis. L. O. L. He has also played in every game so far this season.

Ben Simmons

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In 34 minutes. Simmons has started the last five games and freaking balled out. In the five games prior to Sunday’s contest, Simmons averaged 33.2 minutes, 16.4 points, 7.2 rebounds, 6.4 dimes, 1.4 steals, and 1.4 blocks while shooting 83% from the field and 62% from the line. In the 10 games to start the season, those averages were 26.6 minutes, 5.8 points, 6.1 boards, 5.6 dimes, 1.1 steals, and 0.5 blocks while shooting 48% from the field and 47% from the line. What changed? After doing my due diligence, I’ve figured it out.

Kendall Jenner and Devin Booker broke up in November. Simmons started balling out on November 17th. 1 + 1 = 2. This is the kind of analysis you won’t find anywhere else. When the TMZ report comes out that the two are an item again, I better get showered with props.

Seth Curry

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In 29 minutes off the bench. Since returning to action, Curry hasn’t played 30 minutes in a game, but the minutes have ramped up, from 15 to 29. He’s now scored double figures in four straight and has three 20-point games on the season. Curry is only shooting 38% from downtown on the season, but he’s heated up the last few games. He’s a career 43% shooter from downtown. He gets plenty of good looks playing alongside Durant and Irving.