I don’t know BoBo! You don’t know Bobo! Let’s call the whole thing off!
Who is this Bojan Bogdanovic we’re seeing lately!? Once a disappearing act at the starting 2 in Brooklyn, BoBo has moved to the 3 and it’s done wonders for his numbers. As we all know, the Nets’ SG position is the NBA’s Bermuda Triangle, so once he broke free of the curse, he finally started rackin’ up da goods! After putting up 44 on the Sixers earlier in the week, it seeming like less of a fluke after going 26/3/5/1/0 against the Bulls last night in only 29 minutes. It was uber-efficient too, going 10-17 from the field with 2 treys and 4-4 FT. What’s surprising about this scoring outburst is in these 70 Pts the last two games, only 18 have come from treys. As a starting F, he’s 18.9/4.2/2.4 with 2.2 treys in 10 games, further proof that the Nets SG position has been hexed by Miss Cleo. “I have drawn the ThrAGNOF, fluke, relegated to D-League and sub-15 minute cards!” At 55% owned, BoBo the bear could easily still be on the wire in your league, as he was even out there in one of my RCLs. Unfortunately he didn’t fit my needs – read: I was out of moves. Ugh! I got antsy with streaming as my non-bye week playoff teams are getting hexed by Miss Cleo too! “I have drawn the suck, suck, brick, and suck card!” Here’s what else went down last night in NBA action:
Bismack Biyombo – They call me Mr. Glass! 25 boards in another start for the one-handed Jonas Valanciunas, going 16/25/0/0/2. The 6-11 FT was annoying, but for teams who streamed Bis earlier in the week with the Raps 5-game schedule (two thumbs pointing at this guy!), it’s been a big man eureka!
Kyle Lowry – Big game, but 8 turnovers. “Yo Kyle, you’re doing too much, cut down on the turnovers!” Now that Lowry is skinny, he’s just always craving more turnovers…
Myles Turner – Ugh, stupid rookie wall! WE MUST BRING DOWN THIS WALL! Only 18 minutes of 9/10/1/0/0 last night. To be fair, Luis Scola only played 20 minutes and Turner isn’t a great matchup with Patrick Patterson. Although theoretically, any NBA player is a good matchup for Patrick Patterson…
Otto Porter – Everyone’s favorite Benjamin Button (hip issues this young?! his NAME?!) is only getting saucier with age, going 12/5/1/3/0 with 2 treys. Had that extended rough patch, but getting his shizz together at the right time.
Marcus Thornton – The Bayou Bomber almost was a part of the Wiz dropping a bomber and losing in Philly. It wasn’t Thornton’s fault though, putting up 18/5 off the bench in 22 ThrAGNOF minutes. Bradley Beal and Alan Anderson sat, so no diamond in the bayou here…
John Wall – Awwwww, so close to the quaddub! 16/13/14 with 9 TO. Who are you letting steal the ball from you?!?!
Nerlens Noel – Ah-ha! Captain N with his pillaging crew went 14/16/2/7/0. 7 steals?! He keeps this up, everyone on The Black Pearl is gonna turn into undead skeletons! Well, only in the moonlight… It’s really a pretty dumb conceit, that movie…
Ish Smith – Up to his usual FG% crushing ways (9-25 FG), but 20/2/7/3/0 – with the steals a sight for sore eyes. Noel and Ish were one short, almost putting together an Ocean’s Eleven in thefts…
Al Jefferson – Old man Jefferson went 21/10/1/1/0 in 27 bench minutes last night, giving him his best game since November. He’s still 86% owned, which is a little annoying since a lot of dead teams probably held him. If he made it to the wire, he’s a zombie Jefferson! He’s undead too! If only NBA games could be played outdoors in the moonlight…
Josh Richardson – Richie Richardson continues to be awesome because his stats are so rich! Ya know, going back and thinking on it, Richie Rich was just a subversive kids movie teaching America’s youth that being rich is cool, and you should be nice to rich people. No wonder I didn’t join Occupy Wall Street, I love that movie! Anyway, 18/4/1/0/1 for Richardson, playing the fewest minutes of any Heat going 24:33. That’s how to keep riding the hot hand, Supposedtra (sp?)!
Goran Dragic – Tripdub flirt going 16/7/8. It’s been a tale of two halves for the Dragon, adding nearly 2 boards, 2.2 AST and 5.7 Pts per game in the second half averages.
Joe Johnson – I still don’t get this uphill battle I have to fight saying Iso Joe is just a Joe Doe out there. 13/3/4/0/1 with 2 treys and no TO. I mean, that’s a good game and usable, but how is that a must-hold in 12ers still?! Unless you’re streaming multiple spots (which, admittedly, I’m doing in several of my RCL playoff matchups that aren’t going so well, so maybe this isn’t the best advice…), I don’t think you need to hold him.
Tim Hardaway Jr. – Whoa, the graduated cadet from ThrAGNOF academy has picked up some new skills since the NYK days! 21/7/4/1/0 in a start at the 2 for the knee-bruised Kent Bazemore. Bazemore was probable, so it’s not like there’s much we can do with this though…
Jeff Teague – Often the inciting cause of several frustrated comments, Teague’s actually been pretty consistent lately, going 16/3/8 last night. All of the sudden his numbers don’t look drastically worse than last year…
Emmanuel Mudiay – After a pretty hot run is cooling off, that said 12/2/2/1/0 with a trey, only 1 TO, and not killing FT% (5-6) is a better floor game that what he used to do in duds!
Jusuf Nurkic – The Jamba Jus had an extra shot of ginseng last night! 10/7/2/1/1, which I guess isn’t that great given it was in 26 minutes… Malone barely played the scrub starters, running a Skiles-esque rotation last night… Nikola Jokic owners feel that pain!
Thaddeus Young – I keep reiterating how good he’s been and he just gets more Impalish. 16/14/1/2/2, shot 7-11 FG (2-2 FT) and didn’t turn it over a single time.
Sergey Karasev – The next victim of the Bermuda Triangle… 11/5/5 with a trey as the Nets’ starting SG. Remember when Markel Brown was a thing a few weeks ago? That will be Karasev’s fate!
Taj Gibson – Wait, what?! Had to exit Wednesday’s game way early when his balky hamstring got wonky again, there was the possibility of an MRI yesterday, and the answer to all of that is to start him again on a back-to-back?!?!?! Who is running this team’s medical staff, the Pelicans?!?!?!!? 12/6/2/1/2 in 27 minutes, so if you need a big, there’s a chance he was dropped in your league.
Bobby Portis – Still was a big factor, going 12/14/1/0/1. He should continue to bring his crazy eyes into the fold while Pau Gasol is out until at least Monday with his knee all swoll.
Doug McDermott – It’s official! Our poster boy of ThrAGNOF! 25/3/1/0/0 with 5 treys. Ride em while they hot!
Cristian Felicio – Wait, he sounds like a shortstop for the Padres or somethin’… Did he get his sports confused and go into the wrong arena?! 6/3/10/1/2, for a pretty baller line from a guy I know almost nothing about. The Bulls are super banged up so he should get a few mins, but a lot of that production was against the horrific Nets second unit. Not doing much with this, even in the deepest of leagues.
Tyler Ennis – Ennis was like, “lemme Enddis!” 13/5/3/1/0, scoring all his Pts in the 4th quarter. Man, this MEM@MIL game was horrific for fantasy… The Duchess dropped a stinker, Jerryd Bayless had his run cut by Ennis, sheesh…
Giannis Antetokounmpo – Your only good Buck, getting freaky for 15/6/11/1/3. He’s too good…
Matt Barnes – Led the Grizz for 20/7/3/1/1 with 3 treys, but had 5 TO then chased John Henson out of the stadium (literally) after Henson got ejected for pimping a big swat. Matt Barnes has a Happy Gilmore fuse these days! Wait, Henson got ejected for that? For making a constipated face?! I don’t get what constitutes an ejection any more…
Lance Stephenson – Continues to resurrect whatever NBA value he still has by going 19/7/6 last night. In a losing effort to the Tyler Ennis-lead Bucks. Yeesh.
Tony Parker – What in the dimebag?! 18/1/16/2/0, and some fantasy owners are going to win their playoff matchups due to AST from TP. Gotta love the fantasy postseason!
Patty Mills – Another ThrAGNOF! 17/2/2 with 3 treys. If it looks like a potential blowout, then stream away! Unfortunately, the next Spurs outing is against GS…
C.J. McCollum – Uggghhhhh after a dud to start the playoffs, put the nail in the coffin that I should’ve bought in the hype. 26/7/2/1/2 shooting 10-20 as the Blazers hung around with the Spurs and their undefeated home record until they were blown out in the 3rd…
Phoenix Suns – Scored 69 points. What woulda been funny is if they didn’t even score 30 Pts as a team after Slim took Brandon Knight on the 30-pt challenge board. Knight scored 17, so it’s not like it was THAT off…
Alex Len – 10/12/2, so at least was OK… Unlike…
Devin Booker – Who shot 3-14 for 7/3/3/2/0 with 3 TO in a playoff-killing line. -41 in +/- as well. Ouch!
Joe Ingles – Hoping to join Ish and Noel to form the Ocean’s Fourteen cast! 15/4/2 with 6 steals! Shot 6-8 with 3 treys as well. Mini-Kawhi!
Rudy Gobert – Had been really disappearing to the chagrin of several of you loyal commenters, but luckily a matchup against the Suns righted the ship. 9/16/0/0/3 and hopefully this gets the Steiffel Tower erect again. Landmark viagra! Would that work on the Leaning Tower of Pisa?
Shelvin Mack – A pretty easy stream call given he was only 17% owned last Monday morning, the Mack Truck devastated the Suns barren landscape like a war rig on Fury Road. 15/8/10 and playing mad Furiosa!
Thanks everyone for dropping by, and good luck this weekend in your fantasy playoff matchups! I need it in 3 RCLs where I’m down, yeesh! Draw me some rainbow line cards, Miss Cleo!
