He stands 7′ 4″  and weighs 290 pounds. Each hand is 10.75 inches long and 12 inches wide. The size of his hands are more impressive than the 7′ 4″ and 290 pounds for some reason. Do you realize how big 12 inch wide hands are? Go get a ruler. Now place the left edge of the ruler to the edge of your left hand. Exactly. He can dunk without jumping. He battles John Wick and gets in more than a few decent blows in….before getting munched with a book in the mouth. When on the court in a NBA game, though, he does all the munching. You don’t mess with the Boban:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
15 16 2 0 2 2 0 6/7 3/4

In 23 minutes, a season high! Now, the game was a blowout, so Boban got run. Normally, he doesn’t get much playing time because he can’t be effective in the modern game of pace and space. The first person who figures out how to time travel, better have taking Boban back to the 1950s as priority number one. Let’s see how George Mikan deals with a little Boban in his life. Anyways, Boban obviously isn’t fantasy worthy due to the few minutes he receives. He’s a circus act, but it’s always nice to give him a shout out and watch exactly how dominant he could be if basketball players didn’t have to actually run around.

Here’s what else I saw last yesterday:

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I’m fascinated by the 2019-20 Pacers. They lost their two best wing-defenders (Thaddeus Young and Bojan Bogdanovic), two veteran point guards (Darren Collison and Corey Joseph), and two other wing scorers (Tyreke Evans and Wesley Mathews), and Zach Lowe thinks they’re in trouble. He’s probably right, but I don’t care. I’m in on these new-look Pacers. As long as they don’t wear those hideous Hickory jerseys too often, they should be a lot more fun to watch this season. I like that they, and other teams are getting weird and starting two big men. I like that they seem to be counting on TJ Warren as an integral piece after the Suns gave him away for nothing. Victor Oladipo will eventually return. This team has three TJ’s, two Holiday’s, and the almighty Dougie McBuckets. Myles Turner is ascending and yet he or Sabonis could get traded? Maybe the on-court product turns out to be less thrilling than I expect and this team falls flat on its face. Either way, the the storylines are here.

My best guess at a starting lineup sans Oladipo: Malcolm Brogdon, Jeremy Lamb, TJ Warren, Domantas Sabonis, Myles Turner.

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Ah, centers. The literal giants of the fantasy basketball world. There are 56 centers listed below, with the shortest being Montrezl Harrell who stands at 6′ 8″ tall. In the United States, the average height of a male is 5′ 9″, which puts Montrezl in the 99.988 percentile. But he’s the shortest player in this piece. Many, if not most, are seven feet or taller. In the entirety of the world, there are approximately 2800 people seven feet or taller, which translates to 0.000038% of the population on Planet Earth. And 1.7% play in the NBA! Crazy! The outliers don’t stop there, though. Nikola Jokic is the only center who is projected to average over 4 dimes per game, with a whopping 7.5! Since these literal giants tower over the landscape, it would make sense that they dominate the blocks and boards categories. There are 15 players projected to grab at least 10 boards per game. 12 are centers. For blocks, 19 players are projected to reject at least 1.5 shots per game. 13 are centers. Let’s all bow down and pay homage to these titans of the fantasy basketball world.

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Philadelphia fans were the beneficiaries of one of the luckiest, most physically-improbable moments in football history after Cody Parkey’s double-doink field goal miss allowed the Eagles to move on in the playoffs. Just four months later, physics turned right back around and crushed the City of Brotherly Love, as Kawhi Leonard’s heave from the corner looked like a video game glitch. It bounced away from the basket initially, only to turn around and define the Sixers’ season and entire plan for the future. But a new year is on the horizon. Kawhi is in the East no more. And the Sixers are revamped.

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Off the top of my head, Phil and Joan are the most famous people with the last name Collins. Well deserved and they sit on the thrones in the pantheon of Collins’s. Is that right? Or would it be Colline? Whatever, English is my second language. Ebonics was my first. Perusing the list of Collins’s or Colline got me thinking that people that pursue fame are dumb because 99% of the time that you think you’re famous, no one gives a shit or remembers. I guess that’s something someone who’s not famous writes. Anyways, John Collins has been making a case to be on the list.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
30 14 1 1 0 3 1/2 12/21 5/6

Collins has played 25 games, yet is 22nd in the NBA with 16 dub-dubs. For persepective, Joel Embiid leads the league with 36 in 40 games. Over the last eight games, he’s been a top 50 player, averaging 31.7 minutes, 19.3 points, 1.3 threeecolas, 11.8 boards, 2.3 dimes, with 57% shooting from the field and 75% on 4 attempts from the free throw line. The only thing he doesn’t contribute are the D stats. The Hawks play at the fastest pace in the league, so the environment is ripe for Collins to thrive. Unfortunately, the lack of D stats will keep him from challenging Phil or Joan for the throne, but that’s okay. At least he’s in the conversation.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

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This is the Division of New Instruction because, with one year plus the 26 games the Pacers have played so far, Nate McMillan is the senior member of the division’s coaching membership. Two teams, the Pistons and the Bucks had new coaches to begin the year, and the other two teams, the Cavs and the Bulls, changed leadership during the season.

Instruction and teaching do matter in the NBA. So many players are coming into the league with only a year of college ball, so today’s coaches must have staffs that can teach them to play the game. Coaches have to find ways to make players with limitations productive, and the coaches who can do it the best are the ones who are successful.

We witnessed Indiana’s improvement last year under the tutelage of McMillan, and the Bucks and Pistons under new leadership sport winning records this year while looking like different teams.

Three of the teams have records in the top five of the Eastern Conference, while the other two which jettisoned their head coaches early this season, are languishing at the bottom. Also, alphabetically, the records go from worst with Chicago to best in Milwaukee, for whatever that means.

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I love cars and have fixed up a few rice burners in my day. So, when I used to have cable and spent time channel surfing, I’d stop on a NASCAR race and indulge from time to time. Not my thing. Round and round and round and round they go. Look at the clock. Three more hours to go. The most interesting times would be when the pace car would come out. Without fail, I’d get up and sit on the edge of my seat and pray that whoever was driving would just punch it and channel their inner Fast & Furious. It’s going to happen one of these days. That’s how I feel about this Pacers team. The team has been one of the slowest paced teams in the league. Not since 1985 has the team played at a +100 possessions per game pace. Last season, they finished 23rd. I need someone to press the NOS button and let his baby go! Then we could all scream Oladipo Ho! and Myles wouldn’t have to walk 500 miles. I know what you’re thinking: This site is free?

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What’s up Razzballers? With the season coming to a close in the next few days, this will obviously be my last Any Given Saturday of the season. It’s been a pleasure writing for y’all! Anyway enough of that, let’s get to the juicy stat lines. Anthony Davis put up another huge rainbow, going for 34/12/4/2/4 on 13-for-24 FG (0-for-1 3P, 8-for-10 FT) and only two TOs as he led the Pelicans over the Warriors on the road in Golden State. He’s been an absolute monster all year, and especially so in the second half of the season. Best of all, he’s managed to stay relatively healthy. I don’t think anybody is even close to him in terms of fantasy MVP. Long live the Brow. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball:

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KRAMER: Wide open, I was wide open underneath! I had three inches on that guy. You two were hogging the ball.
GEORGE: Me? It wasn’t me. I never even saw the ball. All you do is dribble.
JERRY: I have to dribble, if I give it to you, you just shoot. You’re a chucker.
GEORGE: Oh, I’m a chucker.
JERRY: That’s right, every time you get the ball you shoot.
GEORGE: I can’t believe you called me a chucker. No way I’m a chucker, I do not chuck, never chucked, never have chucked, never will chuck, no chuck!
JERRY: You chuck.
GEROGE: Kramer, am I a chucker?
KRAMER: You’re a chucker.
GEORGE: All these years I’ve been chuckin’ and you’ve never told me?
JERRY: Well it’s not an easy thing to bring up.

 

You’re a punter. It’s not an easy thing to bring up. But you are. The good news is that your opponents are, too, but they may not know it yet. No, you probably didn’t plan to punt a category. But, at this point in the season? Yes, you should be punting at least one category. It might be because you’re out of the running in assists in your roto league. Maybe you’re just stuck in the middle, 300 rebounds behind the team ahead of you, and 300 ahead of the team behind you. Or, in head-to-head, you’ve seen your playoff opponent’s team, and you know you’ll double that team’s threes easily, while it’s even clearer that you have no chance to compete in FG%. You are now punting those categories that can’t help or hurt you. You can use the word ignoring instead, if that helps. You’re not trying to get players that are bad at the categories that no longer matter. You just don’t care about them anymore. So, it’s going to take a bit more work to figure out who’s worth more to your team now. That’s where today’s Run The Numbers comes in.

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Just three weeks left in the NBA regular season. Man, how quickly time flies. Seems like just yesterday when preseason rankings were all the hype and Anthony Davis was viewed as more of a top 8 than top 5 player.

Boy, were we wrong. The Brow’s averages during this month are 31.2/0.8/12.7/1.9/1.8/3.4/2.5 on 52.5%/87.2% shooting and he has already played 64 games on the season. Utterly ridiculous performances all around and we might be witnessing one of the strongest fantasy months of all time. Many fantasy teams that will win it all this year will have him on their roster and it will be hard to take him anywhere below no 1 in next year’s drafts. Thoughts and prayers to all the owners that have to face him in the fantasy playoffs.

As per usual, starting with a quick recap of last week’s suggestions, Terry Rozier is currently getting all the minutes he can handle in Boston and will continue to produce even when Kyrie Irving returns, so congrats if you added him for the stretch run. I was also very impressed with Corey Brewer, who continues to defy expectations with a great week in which he averaged 3.7 steals and 14.3 points and was the 13th best player in fantasy during this span. Kyle O’Quinn’s contribution in the blocks department was also steady with 1.7 and he even helped in other categories with 9.3 rebounds and 1.3 steals. Finally, Allen Crabbe missed all but one game this week and, although, he was very efficient, he is just too inconsistent for my taste while Ish Smith’s minimal appeal is officially nonexistent with Reggie Jackson returning to the Pistons starting lineup.

Please, blog, may I have some more?