Do-you-want-s’more?
That was the last time I saw a Butler as mechanical as Jimmy Butler… “He’s more machine now, than man!” Well, that was more a bartender, but ya know… Godzilla returned from a pretty scary knee injury faster than I thought, going 24/11/6/1/0 in 34 minutes Saturday night exactly a month after “straining” his knee. I’m sorry, when I hear nonspecificity with a knee injury, it’s scarier to me than realizing Deebo from Friday would lead our presidential candidates right now. “WHY THE HELL IS IT EATING ALL THE SATELLITES!?” Future came sooner than we thought on that one… Focus, JB! Aziz, light! Godzilla did have some warts with the 5 TO and fouling out (actually the first time he’s fouled out in his career!), but when you’re a lizard-beast born from nuclear winter, it’s tough to have a blemish free outing! I preached caution in trying to buy Buckets low, so hopefully you were bolder than me. More daring. Basically let’s hope you treated this like a giant Dorito, while I was a tasteless vegan vegetable straw. Here’s what else went down over the weekend in fantasy hoops action, plus The 7 Ahead for week 19 (last week of the regular season!!!!):
Damian Lillard – Droppin’ the 50-burger! Although in a loss… 50/3/5 against the Raps, following it up with a 26/5/5 line last night (albeit with 7 TO). The red hot Blazers are now suddenly ice cold. The Omen can’t do it all! Although he is for fantasy owners – well worth the high price tag many put on him (humble brag!). I didn’t even notice I was #1! And yes, I’m taking credit for #1, get out of here site projections!
DeMar DeRozan – Someeeeeebody did well in their FT drills growing up! Hit 24-24 FT before that dumbass Kyle Lowry said to brick the last one with 0.9 second left to ensure a win. Pssshhh, a measly NBA win vs. an NBA record?!?!?! Would’ve set the record for consecutive FT makes in a game… F you Lowry… F you…
Golden State Warriors – What in the worllllld?!?!? Missed almost all of their treys against the Lakers and that suffocating perimeter defense (hah!) to lose 112-95 for the greatest upset in sports history. Reprising his role as the hero coach, Kurt Russell will play Byron Scott…
Elfrid Payton – Yeesh, from putting him on the Shelfrid to dimebags in 3 of the last 4… SKIIIIIIIILES! Because ya know, you obviously play a new acquisition his highest minutes his first two games he gets to town, like you do with Brandon Jennings… Hopefully you had more patience than I did, it’s a virtue!
Alex Len – Man, oppo’s need to stop hacking the big guy! He’s already got a long injury history as it is! Double-digit FTA in 4 of the past 5, including a dominant 31/15/0/1/2 line Friday against the Magic. Dubdubs in 5 straight too. The REAL Lensanity!
Devin Booker – After finally getting out of his slump last Thursday night against the Heat (and getting the lead on our last daily notes!), 14/4/6 then 27/2/9/1/1 over the weekend. Dem dimes doe! If you got lucky, someone got bored and dropped him and you snatched him up.
Joe Johnson – Weekend lines of 12/0/2/2/0 and 14/5/1/1/0. Soooooo boring. I ain’t regretting cutting that in 12ers.
Robert Covington – He’s like a serial flasher! I think he would play his best ball in an oversized trenchcoat, and just flash that potential left and right… 25/5/3/2/1 with 4 treys Friday, then back down to 9/9/4/1/2 last night. Which I guess is still OK, but that was like a nip slip compared to the full body flashes we sometimes get…
Myles Turner – Sad last two games from my boyfriend, as he was benched against the Hornets for the matchup against the miniature PF Marvin Williams. Then didn’t get it back together starting at the Wiz. I think it’s a rookie bump, not a rookie wall. We must take this wall [perception] down!
Otto Porter – Well, this wall I’m a little more worried about. He’s playing a ton more minutes this year as he’s become a starter, and other than one decent game Feb 28 against the Cavs, his last 9 have been absolutely dreadful. The minutes are winding down, he’s had hip issues… I scurred.
Shabazz Muhammad – The Wolves are on fire! All of em! Collectively! Set a franchise record for FG% making 52-76 from the field against the Nets – who sat everyone – for 68.4%. That’s lunacy! And I love how Bazz, who has been a hot scorer lately, weighed em down shooting 4-8! What a brick layer!
Andrew Wiggins – After only playing 21 minutes @MIL on Friday and continuing to make me look dumb for ranking him high, bounced back in the Wolves hot shooting night for 26/4/6/1/0 on 10-14 FG.
Markel Brown – Well the Bermuda Triangle of NBA positions continues to have weird things happen, like Markel Brown having back-to-back relevant lines of 21/8/7 and 23/1/1. Even on a rebuild team, back-to-back career highs seem really fluky for him. We’ve also got Sean Kilpatrick scoring 12 then 19 points over the weekend’s game. Although as soon as one of these schlubs starts a game or two, they’ll disappear forever…
Giannis Antetokounmpo – The dimes are out of control! 8.5 APG the past 6 games, which is crazy to think about as his season-long number is still only 3.4. Giannis owners if dynasty certainly don’t want the Bucks to pick up an NBA-caliber PG! Just an unreal weekend of 27/9/12/3/2 and 26/12/10/3/4, missing back-to-back tripdub rainbows by only one board… Trey Burke… Ben McLemore… Anthony Bennett! 3 of the 14 guys to get drafted ahead of The Freak.
Jabari Parker – While not as Freaky, is scoring a boatload of Pts and has 2 STL in each of the last 4. 26/5/4/2/1 and after being unthinkable coming into the year, Jabari vs. Wiggins will be a discussion next year…
Shelvin Mack – 12/5/8 against the Grizz on Friday and looked like it might’ve started coming together, but then a very blah 11/3/4 in an easier matchup against the Pels. I might rather…
Mario Chalmers – …take Chalm, who is playing some hot basketball right now. Maybe not Wolves against the Nets hot, but 11+ Pts and multi-steals in 5 straight. Remember, it was the steals that made him interesting on the Heat, so it’s nice to see those coming around.
Emmanuel Mudiay – I’d take Mudiay – who is looking better – over both those last two though, as the raw rook is off 3 straight great games now. 25/6/7/2/1 Friday then completed the rainbow for 16/8/4/2/2 last night in the OT win against the Mavs. Only 7 TO the last 3 games as well, with eye-popping popcorn numbers. Daddy like!
Kenneth Faried – For the love of Manimal! Goes Goromotaro in that OT win, going 25/20 and on a great 7-game run. I only had him in one RCL, so thankfully I held through the near-extinction. Now the Manimal is flourishing! Global warming!
Kris Humphries – Bouncing around teams like Kim! As in, she bounces around husbands… Camon! Had a big Hawks debut for 14/8/0/1/1, but it was a blowout and indeed a mirage – 13 minutes of blah in the follow up Saturday.
Eric Gordon – If he has a girlfriend or wife, they need to take the hint! Well, it’s his right ring finger he keeps breaking, but whatever… details! “He’s just not that into you” broke that finger again, and is likely out for the season this time. Yikes. Time to get back on the Norris Cole train! Go mining in your free agent pools for Cole! No…?
Bradley Beal – Ummmm, sprained his pelvis? That joke just writes itself… Might not even miss any time, especially if he can embrace proper-form missionary…
Iman Shumpert – What’s weirder? Spraining your pelvis (which I thought was a bone, but ya know) or Shumpert grabbing 16 REB in a game? I’ll take the latter…
Derrick Favors – Finally! The D stat explosion! 28/11/3/1/6 on 11-19 FG and 6-6 FT Saturday at the Pels. The steals have realllllly fallen off though since the back issues. I lovvvveee his game, but it’s probably too risky for me to invest strongly next year.
Pau Gasol – Motor just won’t stop… 28/17/6/2/2 against the Rockets Saturday night, but with 8 TO. Motor might be running too fast, slow it down!
Nikola Mirotic – On top of Buckets, the Bulls got back Mirotic and are suddenly healthy. Well, for now… 7/2/1/1/0 in 16 minutes in his return, and I’m in no rush to pick him up, even in 12ers. I think it’s a long-term easing in, McBuckets keeps playing, and all this does is make Bobby Portis easily cuttable (only 4 minutes).
Manu Ginobili – Went balls to the wall in his return! Ugh, ummmm, poor choice of words… 22 Pts in only 15 minutes, and while it’s nice and all given his injury, it was against the Kings…
Kent Bazemore – Has been the subject of many comments lately due to his fading stock, but has been better lately capped off with a 17/5/2/1/2 line at the Clip Saturday night.
David Lee – Looking more and more like this is gonna stay, with his best line as a Mav last night for 18/12/3/0/4 against the Nugs. Probably must own in 12ers, as Carlisle is emphatically benching Zaza Pachulia for the playoffs. At least he is making these decisions strongly apparent! SKIIIIIIIIILES could learn a thing or two!
Corey Brewer – Picked up 6 steals on Saturday then 23/4/3 with 5 treys last night. He really only gets a mention because I’m excited for my Brew Crew as baseball approaches!
The 7 Ahead
- 5-game week: n/a
- 4-game weeks: ATL, CHA, CLE, GSW, LAC, MEM, MIL, NO, NY, ORL, SAC, SA, UTA
- 2-game week: BOS
- Weekly League Streamers (by Y! ownership percent/games this week): Norris Cole (26%/4), Jose Calderon (36%/4), Mario Hezonja (7%/4), Jerryd Bayless (16%/4)
- Stream days: Thursday, Sunday
Overall Thoughts: Well of course in the REL I own IT2/3 and Boston Clam Crowder, so hopefully I don’t get reared with that 2-gamer too hard in the final regular-season week!
Despite a pretty light schedule up until Friday, we get a pretty big chunk of teams on 4-game slates. Friday and Saturday are hectic, and with so many teams on back-to-backs those two nights, I’m using a lot of my streaming on Fri/Sat stacks in limited moves leagues. For my streamers, I still dunno if Cole is a bonafide hold while Gordon is out, but I’d roll with him for 4 games. Jose Calderon has actually played 31+ mins in 5 of the past 6, and Rambis said he’s not playing the youth just yet. With matchups at DEN, PHO, LAC, LAL, it’s hard to see him being useless and he’s out there in a ton of leagues with his %-ownership slanted by some dead teams as he was universally drafted. Hezonja is also playing more mins now, and gets a nice West Coast trip as well going at GS, LAL, SAC and POR. Finally I’m of course sucked into the JB love! The Bucks get @CHI, MIA, but then an awesome final 2 games of NO then @BKN.
Monday: After a busy Sunday, DAL, GSW, MEM, and MIL wrap up b2bs, so be sure and track your vets on those squads. Look for the Warriors to come out angry hosting the Magic! MIN, ORL and SA head into b2bs, so worth tracking there as well, of course specifically your Spurs. Overall it’s a 7-game slate, so hopefully you’re starting your week off strong with the schedule. I always look for who the Kings face, and on Monday it’s the almost-as-bad-but-not-quite-as-much Pels. Another nod for Norris Cole there.
Tuesday: 6 games on Tuesday, as we kick off the final week of the regular season with some pretty light slates. NY & UTA are your only teams heading into b2bs, so keep an eye out there. ORL goes @LAL in their first game since stunning the Lakers, I bet we see a MASSIVE hangover there. Start your Magic with confidence. The Knicks get a @DEN then @PHO Tue/Wed stack – so I could see streaming a Knick there – and weighing Calderon as mentioned above in limited daily moves leagues.
Wednesday: Man, hard to believe so many teams have 4 game slates with how light the schedule looks day-by-day… Only 9 games on Wednesday that usually goes double-digits most weeks, so you may have to start weighing streamers earlier than usual. CLE and PHO head into b2bs, with the Cavs playing a putrid set of teams – @SAC then @LAL. It’s almost a guarantee we see some of the big 3 gets rested in one of those, so be sure and track your Cavs up until tip. As mentioned above, the Knicks go into Phoenix, so there could be some streaming to be had there.
Thursday: Light schedule again, as we get only 4 games this Thursday night. Only CHI goes into a b2b, but if your Friday isn’t full, they make for a great Thur/Fri stack as they’re facing the Kings Thursday. I’m probably avoiding Portis, but maybe Doug McDermott or E’Twaun Moore could fit some needs as streamers. We also get DEN@PHO which should be rife with streaming opportunity, so I would roll the dice on anyone that fits needs in that game. Feels like both teams have 4-5 streamable, high-risk assets.
Friday: Finally a big(ger) schedule night, with 10 games on Friday. A whopping number of teams have Fri/Sat stack streaming opportunities – CHA, DET, GSW, HOU, MEM, MIA, NO, OKC, ORL, PHI, POR, and WAS. In 4 moves-per-week RCLs, I’m probably using at least 2 moves on those sets of options. BKN gets @PHI, so whichever scrub SG is hot might be worth a shot in the dark. ORL goes @SAC, yet another reason I like Super Mario. Even though he’s more like the midget Mario to me, I think he was overdrafted by the Magic… SKIIIIIIIIILES! Well, it wasn’t really his call, but ya know!
Saturday: Aha, this is where we make up for earlier light schedules – another 10-game night of the weekend, marking b2b nights with 20 teams in action. If you procrastinate, you’re in luck! IND and MIL wrap up the week on Sat/Sun stack b2bs, and both squads have some streaming options. IND goes @DAL/@ATL. If Ian Mahinmi is still out there, the Mavs struggle against bigs at times, and for deeper leagues, you could do worse than Rodney Stuckey. For MIL, it’s all about JB! I mean, what facet of life isn’t?! Jerryd Bayless is really your only streamable Buck, and gets NOR and @BKN. Hell, I was on the fence for my last weekly stream guy, and I’m going for the gold. JB FOR PRESIDENT!
Sunday: Wrapping up with a whimper, a lot of owner’s fantasy seasons could end with Sunday’s whimper and unfortunately not with a bang… 5 games on the slate, and keep an eye on CLE and UTA that go into Sun/Mon back-to-backs. Really another day to be sure an monitor your Cavs. For streaming, I’m indeed looking at those Jazz. They go @SAC, and hopefully it can be an Alec Burks breakout party if he’s back healthy. Some other last-minute options I like is the always-underrated fantasy value from Dennis Schroder even off the bench, and any usable Knick going @LAL. Can’t believe I am mentioning a Calderon stream again… Yikes!
The playoffs are almost here, Razzball Nation! I hope you had a strong matchup in Week 18 as we gear up for the postseason, and good luck in the final week of the regular season!
