I gotta say, last night might have been one of the most exhilarating early season nights of NBA action that I can remember for some time. Career-highs, two buzzer beaters, a triple double, upset Ws… It was awesome.
Before we get into how the city of Cleveland can just give up hope… again… if you haven’t noticed on the main page of the site, Slim is in need of a new didgeridoo! When my awful Hornets somehow beat the Heat, he took his frustration out on his favorite instrument, banging the wood in fervent frustration. Wow, that sounded wrong! But Razzball Nation can help! Click on his donate button there to help him buy a new didgeridoo, for any value you wish, especially as a thanks for helping with the comments in the wee hours of the morning whilst I beauty sleep snuggled up with my Brandon Knight blow up doll.
But before that mental image is indefinitely burnt into your subconscious, let’s get back to action on the court where the big game was obviously the Jazz knocking off the Cavs on a Gordon Hayward buzzer beating fader. “Look Butler fans, I can hit big buzzer beater shots!” Awwwww, low blow… The Cavs had all sorts of terrible sluiced through their stats, like six, count em, SIX assists in the entire game. Four were from LeBron too. I guess the other Cavs want to prove to LeBron they all can be ball hogs. In contrast, the Spurs had six assists on their first six field goals in their win last night… But not like they’re a model franchise or anything!
As NBA fans, which all of us are even if we care more about fantasy than anything else, last night was a winner. I guess unless you’re a David Lee owner, or Cleveland fan… There’s always Green, or the Browns tonight! Colors to the rescue! Here’s what else went down in fantasy hoops action:
LeBron James – 31/3/4/3/0 with the great 12-12 FT and three treys, even if the last one was on a fortuitous bounce. And those four assists constituted 2/3 of the team’s, so for a normal team in a normal game, he shoulda had like 20.
Kyrie Irving – 34 points and nothing. 34/1/0/2/0 with two treys on 12-23 shooting. I’ll probably link this video a few times through the year, but it’s always my favorite ball hog video-ization – Carlton is Kyrie!
Trevor Booker – Only 21 minutes, but my god, Enes Kanter looked terrrrrrible on D. Even Charles Barkley couldn’t make enough of a U sound to make it sound terrible enough. I’ve been tooting my Enes horn for a while! Not like that, about his bad D! Eesh, poor sentence structure today… 9/4/2/0/0 for Booker, and other than Hayward’s game-winner, had the Jazz shot of the game with a late trey. I could easily see Booker starting at the 4 sooner than later.
Dante Exum – Didn’t look like a great impact player, but was competent and played more than Trey Burke (25 to 23 minutes). 3/2/5/0/0 for Exum, not great especially shooting 1-5, but no TO and playeed some crucial minutes down the stretch in a season-high of PT. Something to keep an eye on when you walkabout your wire.
Tobias Harris – So many buzzer beaters, so little time! Huge game from -T (Tobias) for 18/8/1/2/1. Showing off his Man Inside Him.
Elfrid Payton – Looking like the rook we hoped! And the hair we hoped. You rock that updo! 8/6/5/4/1 in a near rainbow.
Channing Frye – Very likely was dropped in your league at some point, so be sure he’s owned. 13/11/1/2/0 with two treys shooting 5-12. Sure it was the Sixers, but he’s a no-upside, high-floor, must-own, I-want-to-hyphenate-all-the-time-now, kinda guy nowadays. Another 36 minutes as well, so his knee issue seems to be healed up.
Tony Wroten – Nears the trip dub! But with TO… Still, great game and looks ungodly aggressive out there. At least the Sixers are trying! …ish… 9 turnovers, but you can get past that with 27/3/8/5/2 in a rainbow, and hit his FTs going 5-7. Shot 9-16 and hit 4 treys. This is when the iron looks the hottest, Michael Carter-Williams is practicing tomorrow and nearing his return.
Hollis Thompson – Worth owning in a ton of leagues right now. 6/9/1/3/2 in a near rainbow in 34 minutes. Only shot 1-5, but those counting stats are worth some fantasy attention. Combine Hollis with his brother Klay, and it would be a Thompson Square! (god, the fiance has me knowing way too much about country now…)
Brandon Davies – Shot 9-11 hitting a trey for 20/4/1/1/0. Other than an inexplicable 5 minutes of PT on Halloween (maybe he dressed up as Malcolm Thomas at halftime?), has played 18 or more minutes and scored 12 or more points in the other 4 Sixers contests. Started last night, but he’s a non-factor in boards and blocks for a PF. The points are worth attention in the deepest leagues though. Plus the PT will stay very high if…
Nerlens Noel – …misses any time with the sprained ankle that knocked him out last night. It didn’t seem too serious, but the Sixers have been known to bench players with hangnails.
Kemba Walker – Stopped the labradoodles! A crazy efficient 5-6 from the field (2-2 3pTM 6-6 FT) 18/4/7/2/0 in a huge win for Charlotte against Slim’s Heat. Other than the uncharacteristic efficiency, that line is something close to what you’d expect average wise for Kemba going into the year. I don’t know if the dimes really come back at all in a consistent way, I’m still in the selling market.
Lance Stephenson – Don’t get suckered in! 8/13/4 is fun and all, but shot 3-12, 0-1 from deep and still hasn’t made a trey this year after averaging 1.1 per last year. And another 3 TO with the giveaways way up from 13-14.
Miami’s awful PG shituation – Norris Cole 2/4/1/0/0 (22 mins), Mario Chalmers 6/1/3/1/0 (32 minutes), Shabazz Napier 7/2/3/1/0 (26 minutes). I honest don’t know if I’d roster any of these three even in 16ers. Eh, I guess you might have to hold Chalmers, but not a decision I have to make – I said I was avoiding the whole backcourt and did so.
Luol Deng – I’ve seen enough. Droppable in 12ers. Even if the shot falls, he does absolutely nothing else except maybe give you a steal or two. I could stream his spot and get much better production.
Rajon Rondo – Tripdub! While awesome and I’m not complaining, maybe one of the worst fantasy tripdubs in history. Well, probably not with the 15 dimes, but 13/10/15 – no steals, no blocks, 5 TO and no 3s. A little Lance Stepehenson-esque! The three cat kings! I keed of course, Rondo is gonna sprinkle in some STL angel dust to his massive AST.
Jeff Green – His line was actually pretty good! 20/4/3/1/3 in a near rainbow which is nice to see, but did have 4 TO. I guess it’s possible a corner has turned.
Kyle Lowry – “You be patient with me, I’m Kyle Lowwwwwry!” 35/4/3/2/0 shooting an incredible 12-17 FG (2-3 3PTM 9-10 FT). And the gravy on the poutines – no turnovers. The Raptors had 7 turnovers as a team last night! More careful with the ball than Lance Armstrong.
Kentavious Caldwell-Pope – So much ThrAGNOF so little time! I said on the pod yesterday I thought KCP would find his shot in this one, and he was a solid 8-14 (4-7 3PTM). Apparently that didn’t translate to the stripe (0-2) and he ended up with a barren 20/2/0/0/0 line. KCP is good at 4 cats: Pts, 3s, Stl, low-TO. And making JB contemplate getting the KCP blow up doll to have the matching set… So 5 cats.
Brandon Jennings – Eesh, I’m so sorry Mr. Proudfoot, whom I said to start BJ over Donald Sloan… To be fair, I didn’t know Stuckey was out three more games at the time! More Pacers later. BJ got the StanVan cockblock for only 23 minutes for 12/2/5 while D.J. Augustin made it a Full House for 25 minutes of 12/1/3. Very bleh.
Greg Monroe – Hitting the glass like the toilet seat! You have to put it down Monroe! Well, you have to get it outta your pants too so there’s that… 23/18/3/1/0 and playing with a little fire.
Josh Smith – Rainbow line! 8/10/5/3/2 and could do no wrong with a game like that right?! I don’t think I could shoot as bad as 2-17 shooting from halfcourt.
Carmelo Anthony – You like the rebounds and assists, but Jimminy Crickety! 13/6/8/0/0 shooting 5-21 and no threes… After hitting 2.2 per last year, 6 threes in 5 games so far in 14-15. The triangle offense is obtuse!
Ricky Rubio – I knew I had to hold the faith of St. Ricky! 14/8/12/2/0 shooting 6-11 hitting a three. If at first you don’t succeed with fantasy love, try try again (actually that’s terrible advice).
Kevin Martin – So close to getting that 30 for Slim! I kinda feel shitty for taking Cousins… Slim, you can have the next one when we want the same guy! 26/7/3/1/0 for Kmart with another solid 6-6 FT to add into his high-volume FT, hitting 4 treys. Ecstatic to have him where I do.
Nikola Pekovic and the lies they tell in Minnesota – 32 minutes after the Wolves were repeatedly quoted as saying they weren’t playing him more than 26-27 minutes a night. Who runs this team, politicians?! Well, the coach’s name is Flip, so I guess it’s plausible… Pek was, well Pek for 16/11/3/1/0, I’m just mad Gorgui Dieng only got 16 minutes for 2/5 with 2 blocks, including a monster swat. Then again, it might have been out of necessity since Pek was +34 to Dieng’s -27. That’s pretty wild.
Joe Johnson – Cooled off like Ice Cube’s cred. 22 Pts is nice and all, but 22/3/2/0/0 with 3 TO and only 1 trey. People look for the points first, so probably still has some nice sell highness to him.
Brandon Knight – I wish we were best friends. Because after admitting our love in the open, we’re fake more than friends. “I am sure our relationship would be a real home run!” Seems to always be productive, this time even with his shot off (3-15 FG), but did everything else infallibly for 10/9/7/5/0 and 4-4 FT. On top of the dime outpourings, might be a 87-88% FT shooter in big volume. Plus only 1 TO last night.
Giannis Antetokounmpo – 27 minutes, drop the confetti! Did have a few raw looking plays, but shot 6-11 for 13/8/1/0/0 with no TO. The steals and blocks will come, and Jared Dudley was down to 18 minutes. All while the Bucks kept up with probably the favorite in the East right now.
Jimmy Butler – This is how you attack the tripdubs like an elite wing! You seeing this Stephenson?! 14/6/7/4/0 shooting 5-8 and 4-4 FT. The 4 TO suck, but when you’re Godzilla out there, all’s fine with a little collateral damage somewhere…
Aaron Brooks – With Derrick Rose back, Brooks went back down to 13 minutes of sadface. Rose wasn’t even that great either… Butttttt, Rose said he tweaked his ankle yet again. Might sit another game or two making Brooks stream worthy even in 12ers. Stay Tuned (underrated movie).
Donald Sloan – Well, while I feel bad for that one call, how about the best $1 buy in REL history?! Plus, I said “should be solid enough to roster, even in 12ers” before opening night. Surrounded by maybe some less concrete verbiage, but whatever! 31/6/7/0/0 shooting 10-21 (4-10 3PTM 7-10 FT). As I mentioned above, Rodney Stuckey was reported right before tip to miss the next three games with his foot issue. Obviously Stuckey is droppy everywhere, and the Pacers literally had no other plausible PG options for this game. Indiana picked up Gal Mekel for some emergency depth just last night, and Mekel is going to play, so he’s worth a look in 18 or 20ers and this is very likely Sloan’s career game. George Hill and C.J. Watson will eat into minutes as well when they’re ready. But for the deeper dynasties like REL, this was against John Wall, a great defender, and I have Sloan for a mother f dollar! Cue The Little Rascals song, but mashed up with T.I. or something.
Chris Copeland – Whoa, did he graduate from being a ThrAGNOF?! 19/12/4/1/0 shooting 8-21 with three treys. I can buy Copeland for maybe 4-5 boards a game, but he had 45 assists last year in 1127 total minutes. I think he’s still waiting for his prerequisites to graduate from the ThrAGNOF class.
John Wall – Ain’t no schlub named Donald gonna own me on the court! Huge 31/6/10/3/1 in the battle of awesome PG vs. schlubby PG. Game, blouses.
Paul Pierce – After we all had a little “Party like it’s 1999” nostalgia-fest after some nice Pierce games, he had a boring, albeit fine 11/4/2/1/1. Shot 3-15 though. Meh.
Garrett Temple – Had his best game of the young season for 16/7/4. Playing some absurd minutes (43 last night, although OT inflated), and while he doesn’t do anything amazingly well, double-digit scoring in four straight with 7 steals in 5 games. Temple of stream!
Paul Millsap – Trillin’ like illin’! 17/7/3/5/2 in a big multi-cat rainbow game, but still only has one trey through three games. FT% has started slow too. He’ll turn those around.
Jeff Teague – Well that ended abruptly! Only 5 points against the Spurs for 5/0/7/1/0 and 5 TO. It was like the end of the 1700s out there, Teague had trouble with the French.
Tim Duncan – Almost had a double rainbow! People looking at their fantasy teams would’ve been like this. 17/13/4/3/6 and not a single TO. Maybe he’s good enough for the HOF, I dunno…
Goran Dragic – Panic at the Dragon! Another dud for 6/1/3/1/0 in only 26 minutes. The usage is the scary part. Especially when Eric Bledsoe, while yes scoring 23 points shooting a great 9-12, had 9 TO. Dragic’s last game was fine and this was against a stifling Grizzlies D, I’m still shooting the buy lows.
P.J. Tucker – Did a super job off the bench for 5/11/2/4/1 in 26 minutes as well, shooting only 2-3 with 1-1 from deep. Lookin’ like the Tucker from old!
Courtney Lee – Back from the concussion for a big 22/3/3/2/1 near rainbow. I mean, he’s a decent player, but was just hot in this one for 4-5 from downtown.
Kenneth Faried – A slow game in only 21 minutes because the Kings are looking like the surprise team of the NBA right now. Break up the SAC!
Andrew Bogut – No steals or blocks like you’d hope, but you’ll take 6/14/5. You won’t take 34 minutes though! Dude’s bones have more brittle than a rich person’s Holiday party! Let’s get those minutes back to down under 30.
Klay Thompson – Masqueraded into some blocks, but otherwise 19/1/1 and why he’s the king of ThrAGNOF island.
#OccupyDraymondGreen – Whoa, it’s time to bust out the tents and try to avoid the pepper spray! We are the 99%! 24 (career-high)/8/5/1/1 shooting an unreal 8-13 (4-8 3PTM 4-4 FT).
David Lee – Attempted to get eased in, and then his hamstring eased out of position. At least, I think that’s how hamstrings work, they like, move into your abdomen? My only medical experience is from watching Human Centipede. Only got through 7 minutes, and if this has any reminiscence to other hammy injuries with guys coming back too fast, I’d bet he’s out another two weeks. Perfect time to hop back on that DrayDray train! Be sure he wasn’t dropped in your league.
Blake Griffin – What in the?! 14/1/1/0/0 with two TO. The Warriors were up early and Blake phoned it in. Just a like a person would do with their life if they bought a Kia…
Only two games tonight, so be sure to get your stream picks sorted out, and we’ll see you tomorrow!
