Man, without fantasy, blowout NBA games featuring sub-.500 teams might be more insufferable to watch than Vanderpump Rules. I would know, because I was watching both last night – L.A. hipsters being the absolute worst on the TV with the wife, then professional NBA players being the absolute worst on the iPad!
But of course some guys played well in the Denver @ Dallas travesty – a game I know Slim watched as well due to his Nuggets-bias – including Nikola Jokic going for a career-high 27/11/4/0/1. Hit 10-12 FG, 7-7 FT, and after Salah Mejri looked like Hassan Whiteside with 3 blocks in the first few minutes, Jokic really helped anchor down better post play.
Side note on those first two buckets for Jokic – look at Dwight Powell struggling to play D on centers. Just sayin’ based on our Pod this morning! Anywho, this is obviously the right step forward for Jock Itch to get unleashed, and he should have no problem working his way up to 30+ MPG every night now, right? RIGHT?!
Malone on Nikola Jokic: "I played him too many minutes, but just trying to find guys that will at least go out there and compete, play hard"
— Harrison Wind (@HarrisonWind) December 13, 2016
F@#% You, Malone. So that tells me both A) you don’t reward players for playing well, B) but you do punish players for playing poorly, C) actually that makes total sense! It’s why we keep seeing the rotations wildly different night-to-night with no consistency for good performers. It’s exploitative coaching 101 – you don’t reward your underlings for doing something good, only punish them if they disobey. This also tells me it’s yet another Jusuf Nurkic slam, who went 4/6/2/1/0 on 2-6 shooting with 3 TO, and got thrown around a little by Mejri. I think Slim chose the wrong time to be REL-biased by the Nuggets, shoulda stuck with his Jazz! Here’s what else happened last night in fantasy basketball action:
Marco Belinelli – Really settling into that wing-spark role, going 14/3/2/1/0 with a trey and 5-5 FT. Freddy Spaghetti needs to work him into a verse.
Myles Turner – Greatness has just become expected night-to-night! 22/7/0/1/4 with no TO and 4 treys. He’s only up to 0.6 treys/per now, but he peppers them in here and there. Man, if this had happened last year when I went nuts for him as a rookie, I think it might’ve surpassed the #Occupy movement!
Glenn Robinson III – Big Puppy got big run for 33 minutes with Monta Ellis out (groin), but only took two shots hitting a trey for 3 points. That said, 3/6/2/1/3 with no TO. Ellis has been ruled out at least the next 4 games, but I think there’s more streaming upside with these next two:
C.J. Miles – Why can’t I quit you?! 11/2/1/0/2 in 19 minutes, with 3 treys. Oh yeah, that’s why. Hitting treys and getting D stats. He’s still coming off a fairly long-term injury, so maybe the minutes get amped up this week while Monta is out. I’d be sure he’s owned.
Rodney Stuckey – More a streamer/deeper league play while Monta is out, going 14/4/4 last night with a trey in 21 minutes.
Thaddeus Young – Goes back to being Thad the Imposter. 9/5/1/0/1 in 30 minutes. I mentioned several times this was the first good team he’s played for, and it’s really impacting his consistency.
John Wall – 30/6/8/1/1 and trying his best to put this team on his back, but the Wiz sputtered in the 4th quarter to lose to the lowly Heat. Bring in Cousins!
Bradley Beal – 29 points with 4 steals. He’s taken a nice step forward and having a career year, maybe he can indeed be an All-Star like Wall! Although it’s tough to get multiple representatives when your team blows…
Otto Porter – Dude, he is just all over the map game-to-game. 37 minutes, 37!!!!!!!!!!, for 9/4/0/0/0 with a turnover, 0-1 FT, and one trey. One day I feel vindicated he has awful nights like this, then others he looks like a top-20 guy, it’s infuriating! I just want to be right or wrong, not debate it!
Kelly Oubre – As I mentioned on the Pod, I [nearly] quote, “I dunno, if he misses his first couple treys and only plays low-20 minutes, he’s gonna be tough…” 6/5/0/1/0, 0-2 3PTM, 24 minutes.
Goran Dragic – No idea how 34 is his career high… Dude averaged 20.3 a game back in the day for the Suns! 34/5/5/1/0 on 14-23 FG (2-5 3PTM 4-4 FT). Sang to Wall the whole night, “anything you can do, I can do better!”
James Johnson – Returned off the 15-day DL and got back into the rotation with a rotator cuff strain, but his velocity was up, and he was a solid 14/5/3 in 30 minutes. Hate to see no stocks and 2-4 FT with no treys, but at least we saw the run.
Josh Richardson – 10/3/3/1/0 with 2 treys in 29 bench minutes. Two straight low-end usable games off his kankle. If you have any sort of need for 3-n-D, I’d be sure he’s owned.
Giannis Antetokounmpo – 30 points?! Meh. 8 boards, 5 dimes, 3 steals? Blah. No blocks and no 3s is legit a little annoying, but how about zero turnovers?! Zero! Comes after 13 TO his past two games, so good to see some efficiency. Given how much usage he gets and his size, I would think this should score less than zero, right Bret Easton Ellis?
Matthew Dellavedova – Emptiest dimebag I think I’ve ever seen. It’s like Kendall Marshall-esque. 1-8 FG for 2/0/10/0/0 and no TO. 1 cat killer!
Terrence Ross – ThrAGNOF! 21 minutes of 25/5/0/2/0 with 4 treys. Ross Can!
DeMarre Carroll – Ya know, after a brutal start, has really done what I expected over this last stretch. Using our baller player pages, he’s 11/3/1.8/1.4/0.4 with 2.2 treys over the past 2 weeks, which would have him right in range with his better seasons.
Jeremy Lin – Returned just in time for a revenge game! 20 strong minutes off the bench for 10/3/7/1/1 and a trey. Apparently FT form is all in the hamstrings, as he only made 1-4 there, but it’s a strong return to the court! I can’t imagine he’s out there in any competitive leagues, but it might be worth being sure.
Sean Kilpatrick – PBevved! Actually mighta gotten Ariza-ed. 17/3/2 on 6-8 shooting in an otherwise efficient game, but 7 TO. “And if it isn’t Lone Star… And his side kick Puke!”
Trevor Booker – Insanity. 10/13 with 4 steals. The Bookworm is slithering his way into so many steals!
Brook Lopez – Ol’ clownfoot with nary a trey! 26/1/2/1/2 in a nice line, but let’s bring back the Doug Collins shout out! 1 rebound from a 7 footer in 32 minutes?!??!!?
Eric Gordon – 24/0/1/1/0 with 6 treys. But 6 TO as well. ThrAGNOF!
James Harden – Do we really need a blurb? He’s consistency to a T. Consistency fit for a Beard.
Trevor Ariza – Speaking of getting Ariza-ed, rainbow alert! 7/4/2/3/2, but missed all his treys in 37 minutes. I kinda felt like the D’Antoni effect might pass him by in the pre-ranks, and he’s at a low PPG over the past 4 years. FG% and treys are up though!
Salah Mejri – Gave him a little shout in the open (REL bias), and man did I get lucky I added him right before Andrew Bogut got hurt! 3-3 FG, 7/8/1/1/4 in 22 minutes, and this is the kind of line/minutes you can expect. Well, obviously not 4 blocks, but he’s really not too dissimilar from Lucas Nogueira right now.
It’s called a left hand Will Barton, try it out one day!
Deron Williams – Despite all the injuries and putrid play in D-town, D-Will is actually playing acceptable right now, going 17/2/8 last night and is 13.1/2.9/8.4 with 1.6 treys over the past 2 weeks. I don’t think I need to convince anyone that he needs to be sold immediately though…
Dorian Finney-Smith – I love DFS again! I wonder if he’ll get outlawed in Las Vegas… 13/9/3/2/2 with 3 treys in 32 great minutes, and just has a great motor out there. As this was the main game I watched, he certainly passed the eye test and continues to get better and better. That said, still not a 12er add, but in a 14er while hot? Sure.
Darrell Arthur – Came in questionable with a bad knee, got the start, then only played 5 minutes. I don’t think there’s clarity yet on if he hurt himself again, but let’s get less guys on Malone’s plate to mess with!
Jamal Murray – Looked pretty good, getting some extra run/usage with Wilson Chandler looking horrific (1-3 FG 2/1/1/0/0 in 23 minutes). Murray for 15/6/4/1/0, but Chandler was good enough for a long enough stretch that I don’t think he’s gonna lose minutes. But I mean, it is friggin’ Malone, who knows?!
Juancho Hernangomez – Slim’s Latin Lover got 19 minutes of 4/3/1/1/1 with no TO. He was a little smaller/sknnier than I expected watching him more than ever before, but it’s not like Danilo Gallinari is some Manimal out there at PF either! Def could see Juancho playing the small ball 4 one day.
Damian Lillard – Used his Omen powers on this layup!
24/5/8/1/1 and we just expect Omenness!
Mason Plumlee – Damn, Blazers almost got this one! It was against the Clippers in the playoffs that we started to see this version of the Plumlee clones starting to get dimes and facilitate, and he did it again last night in a full 18/7/6/1/5 line. I wish they’d acquire all the other Plumlees and have “Attack of the Clones” jerseys.
Evan Turner – Starting to gel better and better. 15/4/6 last night, and averaging 3.8 dimes over his last 2 weeks. It’s not huge, but it’s amping up and he’s chipping in some steals, so it’s improving, and I could see him being your last roster guy in 12ers kinda like I ranked him.
Raymond Felton – The Clippers continue to be fantasy’s most boring team on a game-to-game basis. Everyone just does their job night in, night out. Oh, well, maybe DeAndre Jordan giving you 3-4 FT on a 9/12/1/3/3 line is pretty nice! But how about Raymond Felton – almost Dunkin Donutsing his way out of the league – but finding a niche as a bench combo guard these past few years… 10/0/1/2/1 with 2 treys and has played some deep league usable minutes his past 5 games. This one was coming after 2 games off due to personal reasons, so good to see him still in the main rotation.
Luol Deng – Ugh. Do I really have to say he’s in the 12er mix again?! Nooooooo! 16/4/4/2/0 with two treys in only 26 minutes. Walton loves to run all his guys under 30 minutes, but I might take a flier if you needed some steals from a wing.
D’Angelo Russell – There we go! Shook off the rust and went 17/2/4/0/0 on 6-10 shooting with 3 treys. Had a +5 in his 20 minutes, while the rest of the Lakers were all in the negatives. Womp womp.
DeMarcus Cousins – He’s like a peacock! Colorful feathers that go all across the spectrum, and he has a diva’s temper! Huge multi-cat line, rainbowing for 31/16/5/2/3 with 2 treys, but had 8 TO and got another technical foul, his 9th. Suspension looming! Bring the peacock to DC!
Darren Collison – 20/1/4/1/0 on 7-11 shooting with 4 treys, but only 2-6 FT?! Meh, I still wanna cheer against this guy…
Garrett Temple – He was the Temple of Doom last night for the Lakers, that’s for sure! Ben McLemore left after 4 minutes with a quad contusion, so Temple got 31 minutes off the bench for 16/1/1/1/0 on an obscene 7-8 shooting and 2-2 treys. He was +41 last night!!!! There are legends about this hidden Temple on the Kings bench!
Omri Casspi – Matt Barnes was “DNP – About to get arrested” and Rudy Gay left after only 14 minutes with a hip flexor. Rock the Casspi! 13/6/3/1/0 on 6-10 shooting with a trey in 30 minutes. But as I said in my pre-ranks, he’s almost a FT-punt only guy! 0-3 FT. Makes no sense… I’d likely add him in all 12ers though, with the minutes possibly available for a big run.
I hope everyone got through a weird opening night of action unscathed, and your fantasy teams didn’t suffer a case of the Mondays! Catch you on Thursday morning, Razzball Hoops Nation!
