The draft is coming, the draft is coming!  Since I have no NBA allegiances, I personally get more excited by the NBA draft than by postseason basketball.  I know – that’s blasphemy!

You’ve heard it murmured.  You’ve heard it yelled.  You’ve heard it pounding down on your brain like voices drowning out your inner thoughts.  “This year’s draft class SUCKS!”  Well, that’s only, kinda-sorta true.  I think it sucks in the sense that there’s little “easily-projectable” talent.  Lots of rawness getting thrown around here, like a food fight at a sushi bar.  “Can I get another Rice Wine!”  And with rawness comes upside, and upside comes dynasty moves.  Mmmmm, can’t wait for the upcoming season 4 of the REL League!  I think since our deep dynasty is my favorite fantasy hoops league, it makes sense that this year’s draft is pretty exciting to me.  A lot of speculation that would make The Prospector proud.  In that regard, it’s not such a Stinky Pete after all!  So be the eternal optimist, dream of some of the 1-and-done upside, and read with us as Slim and I go back-and-forth drafting for NBA teams in our 2016 Mock NBA Draft:

Also – come and join the Razzball League on Fantasy Movie League!  You can join our league through this link here, and the Password is “rball”.  I’ve usually been pushing for readers to join us on the Podcast, but wanted to get an invite to all as the Summer Season is starting today!  Their cutoff for week 1 is at noon EST so there’s not much time, but you can still play every week starting in week 2 and get pumped up and practice for the Fall Season, which we’ll promote hard and have some Razzball prizes and talk it on the Pod.  So be sure and make your picks and try to dethrone yours truly as the winner from Spring!  Plus I ended on a perfect cinema – one of only 22 people – and I’m gonna brag about there everywhere I can! 

PerfectCinema!

Razzball Basketball2016 Razzball NBA Mock Draft

1. Philadelphia 76ers – Ben Simmons – F (Slim)

There’s probably going to be a debate on who’s going to go number one overall right up until draft night. There’s an obvious comparison between the 2 top guys and not that I’m making it but I’ll still parrot the sentiment. LeBron vs KD. The playmaker vs the the scorer. I’m trying really hard to come up with a reason Ingram goes first overall the best I’ve got is that it’s the Sixers making the pick, who apparently have been planning this for years. So maybe they’ve been scouting Ingram since middle school.

Simmons should get 30 minutes at some point and when he does he’s going to be a fantasy star. “But he couldn’t win in college, he sucks!” I hear the argument and I certainly don’t expect the pick to immediately translate into Sixers success. It’s not like the Cavs won too many games in LeBron’s first year.

2. Los Angeles Lakers – Brandon Ingram – F (JB)

Here’s some of the dumbest analysis ever – as an ACC fan of the Heels (still not mad, just proud to be part of such an awesome NCAA Final!), I just had this feeling Brandon Ingram always felt like such a Laker.  Maybe it’s the tats (how’d he pay for em all, Coach K?!), maybe it’s the Nick Young-ish haircut, I dunno…

Anywho, the Lakers immediately get their SF of the future and fill-in for Kobe Bryant.  No pressure!  He has a crazy pterodactyl wingspan, but doesn’t even weigh in at 200 pounds yet, so he’s pretty much John Henson’s little brother.  While he shot the deep ball well in Duke’s system of “let’s shoot as many 3s as possible” to the tune of 41%, just watching him play has me worried how much that will translate to NBA 3-pointers, especially early.  I think he’s a great fit next to the Lakers’ dynamic guards who can both shoot well, and just eat apart defenses in the mid-range. While Ingram averaged 1.1 STL and 1.4 BLK at Duke, I’m not sanguine those translate either.  Maybe 0.8/0.8 or something, with 1.0 treys and 16-18 PPG.  Solid, and a guy I’d draft, but this isn’t the rookie class from the past few years.  His ceiling in his rookie year might be Tobias Harris.  I guess that would be pretty good…

It’d be a shame for him to go #1 to the Sixers in my opinion, where he’d probably be forced to shoot more 3s right away than he should.  Plus the Lakers with Luke Walton are gonna up-tempo the crap out of every game.

3. Boston Celtics – Dragan Bender – C (Slim) [traded to Atlanta in a sign-and-trade for Al Horford]

There has been a trade! After years of promising a fans a major the move the Celtics trade their number three pick for Al Horford. Horford finds a home that desperately needs a big man and the Hawks get Dragan Bender. Hopefully when he shakes hands with the commish he leans into the mic and says, “Bender“. Futurama was fun. Bender jokes for days! I’m excited just thinking about the possibilities.

Minutes on the Hawks with Horford gone? I imagine a few are possible but I doubt anyone trading up for B-E-N, sorry, so anyone trading up for Dragan will be thinking more about what he may become down the road as opposed to thinking they’re pulling a Porzingis.

4. Phoenix Suns – Jaylen Brown – F (JB)

Pretty much the consensus #4 prospect everywhere, it sounds like Brown could’ve pushed for a top 1 or 2 pick coming out of high school if not for some ups and downs at Cal.  He probably had to shoot more jumpers than he wanted to, and the Bears didn’t fit his slasher mentality.

So enter his tenure with the Suns, and there’s some real long-term potential here.  Short term, he has some hurdles.  First road block is they’re likely starting T.J. Warren and/or playing some Devin Booker at the 3.  Book HAS to play, and obviously all the guard minutes are accounted for.  Second road block is he’s also not a floor spacer like Warren – although T.J. did show some signs of a developing perimeter game.  Warren is coming off foot surgery, so you never know there…

Brown will have some dynasty appeal for sure – he’s a one-and-doner with some great raw upside – but I think he’s out of the redraft discussion as it stands right now.  He didn’t have good defensive numbers and turned it over a ton in his freshman season, and with likely inconsistent playing time, it’ll be tough to see him doing all that much on a consistent basis if everyone is healthy.

5. Minnesota Timberwolves – Jamal Murray – G (Slim)

Another Kentucky freshman in the top 5 of the draft. Surprise surprise. The Wolves are close to having the talent to compete, learning how to win is a different animal. Murray certainly isn’t ready to help there but he should still be able to compete for bench minutes and as a scorer first he should be able to win a few.

I’m trying to find a silver lining in his stats but he’s straight ThrAGNoF. Sad, but true. Queue: Metallica.

6. New Orleans Pelicans – Buddy Hield – G (JB)

While Kris Dunn seems to be ranked highly in several places, the Pelicans go for Buddy the Elf and hope the Jrue/Buddy/Brow (that is an awesome sounding name!) can bring the horribly run franchise to the playoffs.  That’s mean, their only issue is their horrific medical staff, and according to RealGM, they have the same head athletic trainer.  Duane Brooks is officially my arch nemesis!  I mean, this is what his team looks like in the OFFSEASON!

pels injuries

He could send his minions at me, but they’re as brittle as Samuel L in Unbreakable…  Wow, this got off track.

So the Pels surprise a little and get the more NBA-ready Hield and hope their last season of Jrue is good enough for a playoff run.  Duane Casey Alvin Gentry (lol!) said Jrue is part of “their core”, but I don’t know if Duane Casey Alvin Gentry is part of the managerial core (well, Casey certainly isn’t hahaha)!  I think it comes down to a gaping need at wing (despite Adam and Slim’s love for Bryce Dejean-Jones) and additional perimeter scoring, despite Luke Babbitt’s best efforts.  So they nab Hield and hope to make some of these Anthony Davis years worth the money.

We all know he’s a scorer and a shooter, but sadly his steals have gone down each season from his soph through senior years at Oklahoma despite playing more minutes each season.  If he lands in Nawleans, I think we get a last-pick flier that we’ll be lumping in the ThrAGNOF bucket pretty quickly his rookie season.

7. Denver Nuggets – Kris Dunn – G (Slim)

Back to back drafts of a PG for Denver, a team that played D.J. Augustin 24ish minutes in the 2nd half of the year. Dunn and Mudiay both have the size to cover multiple positions and while I do think this pairing could work I don’t think Dunn actually makes it to number seven.

For us he isn’t quite 12er worthy in a backup role quite yet. Once he secures a role the steals alone will make him streamer worthy. Once he works his way up to 30 minutes he’ll be fun to own everywhere.

8. Sacramento Kings – Timothe Luwawu – F (JB)

The nickname police are ready to amp it up on this one! I clowned the Pelicans and their organizational management, why would I think the Kings would be smart and draft a high-upside younger guy to try and rebuild?! Did I just talk myself out of this pick!??!?!?

Well, for this mock, I AM THE KINGS DAMMIT!!!  And if any franchise for these next few picks needs to reach for upside, it’s the Vlade Divacs. Timothe is a French National who played in Serbia for the same pro team who embraces building young talent like Nikola Jokic. He’s got some unreal athleticism and the best part of his game right now is his shooting ability. Usually it’s the other way around, with athletes struggling to find a consistent shot.

The Kings have openings everywhere except the Cousins-osphere, but wing would make a lot of sense, especially if they plan to nonsensically re-sign Rajon Rondo. It makes a lot more sense to start a rebuilding effort, and take a lottery ticket.

9. Toronto Raptors – Henry Ellenson – F (Slim)

The Raptors don’t need a PF, they have PatPat!  Exactly.  The Big East rookie of the year is your prototypical jack-of-all-trades.  He shoots 3s, can block some shots, he has the size to even back up center when Biyombo signs elsewhere this offseason, he’s a capable ball handler and passer, and he has good size at 2.1 m and 110 kilos.  Patterson might do one of those things at league average and can’t play center.

Even though he’s still just 19, Ellenson should see bench minutes day 1 and given his competition for minutes I wouldn’t be surprised to see him playing 30ish minutes post all-star break and once he does we could potentially see the makings of a mini-Porzingis, the pigmy goose if you will.

10. Milwaukee Bucks – Marquese Chriss – F (JB)

The Bucks just throw their hands up in dismay that they can’t draft a PG… They tried to move up to the Nugs pick and take Kris Dunn, but the Kings were calling about that pick too and the Nugs decided to figure this out later. Maybe they do some combo guard sets down the line… Wait, why is this about the Nuggets all the sudden?!

With no need at center, the Bucks take the 6’10 Marquese Chriss as a stretch-4 to give some of their big man options a little more spacing. It’s crazy that a perimeter playing 6’10 PF is someone who reportedly has only been playing competitive basketball for a few years.

Having some of the best raw upside of anyone in the draft, the Bucks aren’t TOO mad about Chriss falling to them, and give them a nice long-term play at stretch-4 with a really weak PF corps behind Jabari Parker. Like Brown and Luwawu, he’s probably not that redraft relevant, but a very interesting dyno piece.

11. Orlando Magic – Jake Poeltl – C (Slim)

Going into this past collegiate season I doubt too many people had quetzal-Poeltl as a lottery pick.  Not a whole lot of analysis necessary here, he’s as center as centers come.  The Utah connection begs for the Bogut comp but Poeltl is a more adept scorer.

Orlando has had issues backing up the oft-injured Nikola Vucevic with players like Jason Smith and Dewayne Dedmon.  Poeltl is immediately the backup big man and should see 15ish minutes out of the gate.  Whoever put that gate leading to the floor should probably be fired, it must have been the Pelicans athletic trainer.  I digress.  If/when Vuc misses time Poeltl will be 12er worthy for anyone in need of a big man.

12. Utah Jazz – Denzel Valentine – G/F (JB)

Denzel is all like, “what I got to do in college to make ya’ll like me?!” Maybe he needs to wheel himself around pretending to be a Vietnam War vet, only to be turned into a millionaire on a $1 bet. “We want to help you, Mr. Valentine. My brother and I run a privately-funded program to rehabilitate culturally disadvantaged people. We’d like to supply you with a home of your own, a car, a generous bank account, and employment with our company.” That’s what the Jazz told him on draft day!

Another team that would’ve loved more PG depth if it was available, the Jazz settle on a facilitating wing to back up both Gordon Hayward and Rodney Hood. Backup wing minutes have been very spotty for the Jazz over the past few years, with the likes of Joe Ingles a mainstay in their rotation. Sorry, Ingles family, I say it like it is!

Should Hayward or Hood (the latter has had several lower leg injuries over the past few years) get hurt, Valentine could be a must-add. But out of the gate, it’s tough to see too much. He really lacks in the defensive stats as well, so the best case scenario might be early-years Evan Turner. Wow, that was meaner than the Ingles thing! Maybe he can be a smidge better…

13. Phoenix Suns – Skal Labissiere – C (Slim)

Turn the clock back a year and Labissiere is the unquestioned #2 pick in the draft.  Fast forward to today, not that far, rewind a little, OK, today Skal is nothing more than a shotblocking big man with very little else to his game.  The reason he gets drafted in the lottery is because his upside is as high as anyone in the draft, but if you want to know when that may coalesce then fast forward again and go get yourself something to drink, we may be waiting a while.

There is no way Labissiere will play meaningful minutes next year, but it’s an interesting landing spot if the Suns continue to play Len at PF and with Tyson Chandler turning 73 soon.

14. Chicago Bulls – Deyonta Davis – C (JB)

If Davis doesn’t get a shout out every time he gets to “500” of any stat, that would make me a sad Panda… Ya know what, I made that joke thinking his first name was “Deytona” not “Deyonta”. Dislexia can all us impact!

The Bulls are ecstatic to land the upside talent of Davis, as they hope to speedway him right into the big man rotation. With Pau Gasol all but surely leaving in free agency, the Bulls would have a ridiculously interesting big man rotation of Bobby Portis/Nikola Mirotic starting at 4/5 and Davis playing a lot of minutes backing them both up. He doesn’t have a ton of range yet, but he’s expected to develop more and more of a jumper. With both Mirotic (obviously) and Portis able to stretch the floor, Davis could be a good fit both to next of them, and all 3 can play at a ridiculous pace. Running of the Bulls!

Davis could have an immediate impact in fantasy as a streaming shot blocker. He swatted 1.8 shots per game in only 18.6 minutes in his one-and-done freshman year at Michigan State. I know I might sound a little crazy here, but I think he could be on a Serge Ibaka career path. A little raw with rebounding and shot-blocking ability, but developing his touch.

15. Denver Nuggets – Furkan Korkmaz – G (Slim)

There are too many names in this draft I can’t pronounce.  The 18 yo Turk is the youngest player in the draft but he’s also played professionally for the past 3 years.  A comp that comes to mind is Mario Hezonja, with one major difference which I will present in SAT form.  Hezonja is to Kanye West as Korkman is to Peter Frampton.  If you get that reference then you are my favorite reader.

No one can possibly expect Furkan to play much his rookie year, and that’s assuming he’s even coming over the states next year.  A more reasonable expectation would be plenty of D-League minutes with the possibility of seeing the floor in Denver late in the year once the Nugs are tanking.

16. Boston Celtics – Damatas Sabonis – F (JB)

Ya know, I looked up Arvydas’s numbers, and his career high was only 3.0 AST. I thought he was supposed to be this epicly good passing big man! I guess at 7’3, it is a little different than DrayDray averaging 7 or 8 dimes… Anyway – his son!

Damatas will very unlikely have the impact of his old man, as he’s only 6’10 because his mom must be a dwarf. She apparently was the first Mrs. Lithuania, but I think that was in the “Little Miss Lithuania” competition.  His wingspan is average, he’s not the fastest, not the most athletic, and his basketball measures all come out to + or – 1-“meh”. But he did play very extremely well in his sophomore season, going 17.6/11.8 for the Zags shooting 61%. He’s a good FT shooter as well. Unfortunately it ends there, as his 3-pt game looks underdeveloped and he doesn’t bring D stats. Basically makes him a poor man’s Kelly Olynyk, with some great irony that the C’s unite two former Gonzaga bigs.

If he ever gets run, mayyyyybe he can be like a streamable, low-end Julius Randle. He’s more refined than some of the picks ahead of him, but has a pretty low ceiling. Boston is ready to start competing now though, so he adds a nice, NBA-ready, rotational piece.

17. Memphis Grizzlies – Taurean Prince – F (Slim)

I know most places seem to think Baldwin is a lock to go here and maybe they are right since Conley will be a free agent, but are they really going to draft PG this late and expect him to lead an older team deep into the playoffs?  My guess (cause that’s all I’ve got) is that the Grizz re-sign Conley and draft a wing, which is by far their weakest position.  Prince, no relation to Tayshaun, has all the makings of an above average NBA 3-and-D which is exactly what a team who that is defensively oriented and ranked 2nd to last in 3pt percent needs.

As one of the older players in the draft, Prince will still be 10 years younger than most of the Grizzlies.  Memphis isn’t known for playing their youngsters but I think there’s enough of a blackhole at SF that it seems to make sense that Taurean will get some run.  For our purposes there really isn’t a whole lot to see; he isn’t a great steals/blocks guy unfortunately.

18. Detroit Pistons – Wade Baldwin – G (JB)

The Pistons are a really exciting young team, so they decide to pick a pretty un-exciting backup PG. “Way to slam your own pick, JB!” Any time, dear commenter!

At 6’4 200 lbs, Baldwin is a pretty big dude for a PG. Spencer Dinwiddie is still in the mix (and he’s more lanky at 6’6 than a physical guy), but he hasn’t done anything to distinguish himself as the long-term backup PG to R-Jax. Baldwin is a D-first kind of guard, that could play some great lockdown defense against second units. But this is a Stan Van team, so second units aren’t gonna get a ton of run. Pretty blah for future upside.

19. Denver Nuggets – Ivica Zubac – C (Slim)

Hey it worked for Jokic.  Zubac isn’t coming to the states this year.  He’s got alot of the intangibles that can’t be taught.  Soft hands, good touch, mobile, and good size and length.  So apparently if basketball doesn’t work out, most of those traits should still play if he chooses to instead transition to porn.

20. Indiana Pacers – Brice Johnson – F (JB)

Yessssss! YESSSSSS!!!! The Pacers are an absolutely dynamic spot for Brice to land, where the future tandem of Brice Johnson and Myles Turner will make me a die-hard Pacers fan. Let’s just hope it goes better than the LAST TIME the Pacers drafted a UNC center early on… Just look at that Wiki page and compare the list of awards length to how much is written on his NBA career… Hah!

Yes (apparently every paragraph will start with that word) – this may be a little bit of a biased reach. But he makes succchhhhh a good fit for the Pacers, who want to run quick and shoot early-and-often, with their C of the future Myles Turner a jump shooter. Johnson still doesn’t have much of a jumper, but he wouldn’t need to develop that too much in IND and rely on his defensive explosiveness and interior impact.

Yes, Ian Mahinmi is a free agent, but even if he stays, he’s not close to a 30 MPG guy and seems to always have nagging injuries. The rest of their big man corps as it stands right now are as unexciting as it gets. For fantasy – he’s kinda like Deyotna Davis except without the dyno upside. But could be pretty fun to own for the highlight reel plays.

21. Atlanta Hawks – Damian Jones – F (Slim)

Horford is gone.  Bender isn’t ready to contribute and Muscala doesn’t inspire much confidence, so in comes Damian Jones, the savior of Atlanta!  Or maybe I should say Damian is the anti-savior, it’s all a matter of your point of view I guess.  Jones is a monster of a man, a 7-footer with 7’4″ wingspan, already weighing 250 lbs, and only 6.6% body fat.  He can get the Drummond/DeAndre comp for his body but maybe the comp should be more about his 53% FT shooting.

With Horford gone and no NBA calibur starter to step in Jones could very well get minutes.  I just remembered someone though, Walter Tavares.  Mmm… blocks, nevermind, Jones won’t play much if at all.

22. Charlotte Hornets – Malik Beasley – G (JB)

Michael Jordan – when he’s not crying – is all about drafting players who did awesome in college. The Hornets are the NCAA All-Stars!

Yet another one-and-doner, Beasley averaged 15.6 Pts as a freshman at Florida State with 1.6 treys. It’s a pretty boring statline elsewhere though. But the Hornets need a wing scorer, with Courtney Lee out of the picture. Beasley can knock down some spot up shots from Kemba or Lin and have stats something like P.J. Hairston had the first part of last year.

23. Boston Celtics – Ante Zizic – C (Slim)

What do you do with 17 draft picks and only 15 roster spots?  Of course you draft a guy and leave him in Europe.  I’m a bit torn on which way to go with Zizic.  Is he the M.O.P. song from 15 years ago or is he a vegas card game?  I guess if you’re in a euro fantasy league then, “Yap the fool!”  That’s right, “Kidnap that fool!”

24. Philadelphia 76ers – Demetrius Jackson – G (JB)

After nabbing Simmons, the Sixers move to PG and are elated to find D-Jax still on the board. Yes him! The Redskins WR!

Another big, stocky PG like Wade Baldwin, Jackson has good quickness and is really built, but isn’t the best shooter yet. He could play nicely in the pick-and-roll with the Sixers stockpile of bigs, but obviously here in tank(Sixers)-land, he’s still going to be behind Ish Smith if they re-sign him. While his positives are upside and ability/leaping ability, his negatives are question marks on playmaking and defensive ability. Makes him a perfect fit for the Sixers!

25. Los Angeles Clippers – DeAndre Bembry – F (Slim)

There’s no shortage of bleh players in this years draft, but for my money Bembry is not one of them.  Offensively he’s a great distributer (4.5 assists per game) but still needs to work on his shooting (26.6% from 3s).  Defensively he’s capable of being a steals/blocks guy (1.4/0.8 respectively) but motor has been questioned at times.

Throw Bembry onto a veteran team that desperately needs both a wing scorer and defender and there might actually be minutes available.  If that happens then Bembrey would be a sneaky deep league guy due to his contributions across the board.

26. Philadelphia 76ers – Tyler Ulis – G (JB)

Yup, the Sixers decide to go bold with their late first round picks and take two PG to battle it out for playing time and see which one fits their tanking system better.

While D-Jax is a little bigger and relies on athleticism, Ulis is smaller and more a shooter. He’s one of those ThrAGNOF point guards with a great A:TO ratio because he’s either making the simple pass or jacking up a trey. At 5’10 and 160 pounts, Ulis is pretty undersized, so it makes sense to pair him with the 6’2 200 lbs D-Jax. If there’s no Ish Smith and the Sixers indeed go into the season with these two rookies looking at playing time, I won’t be too interested in either…

27. Toronto Raptors – Juan Hernangomez – F (Slim)

The younger (and smaller) Hernangomez plays a very different game than his brother who was drafted by the Knicks last year.  Juancho is a shooter through and through and if he came to the states he might even lead the D-League in scoring.  I think most expect him to stay another year in Europe though considering his more athlete than basketball player at this stage in his career.

28. Phoenix Suns – Cheick Diallo – F (JB)

The Suns are getting so chic with their new upside-y big man!

At 19 years old, Cheick is apparently a bottle of energy at PF, although lacking in any sort of finesse. He has a crazy 7’4 wingspan for his size, making him a shot blocker and rebounding specialist. He’s extremely raw and barely even played as a freshman at Kansas, even though a big part of that was some NCAA hooblah that I’ve just kinda become numb to. Makes me wanna cheer for this kid more.

He’s at best some deep rotational big man depth for the Suns and at worst spends all of 16-17 in the D-League while picking up more tools on O.

29. San Antonio Spurs – Sheldon McClellan (Slim)

Don’t ever question Slim’s homerism!  “But you aren’t even a Miami fan.”  My answer to that is once Billy the Kid left UF I didn’t have much of an option.  McClellan might not be the best defender but what he lacks in defensive stats he more than makes up for in efficiency.  While not quite 50/40/90 he did manage a pristine 50.4% FGs, 40.6% 3s, and 83.8% FTs, and for a guy who had the ball in his hands as much as he did his 1.3 TOs were exceptionally low.  Efficient players who make the right decisions, sounds like a Spur to me.

30. Golden State Warriors – Zhou Qi – C (JB)

Mr. irrelevant! Even though his last name is a SUPER relevant Scrabble word! I’m officially nicknaming Zhou “11 points”, since that’s how much “Qi” by itself is worth on the Scrabble board. The giant C from China is still just as giant a work in progress though.

At 7’2 with a standing reach of almost 9-and-a-half-feet, dude is nothing but skinny limbs. Ready to feel fat? He apparently only weighs 218 pounds. Ahhhhh! But after watching some scouting videos, he kinda has a Kristaps Porzingis feel to him! Really light on his feet with a quick, natural looking jumper. Now, he’s still wayyyyy back in the prospect ranks because he is so skinny and might not be able to play huge MPG. But with a huge following in China and a need for Golden State for a shot-blocking big who could shoot, this would make a ton of sense.

 

And there you have it – our first round Mock!  I’m going to be on vacation next week, so I’m not going to be getting to all your comments right away, but I’ll be back next weekend and catch up!  See ya then, Razzball Nation!

  1. A Hill O' Beans says:
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    You don’t realize how tall NBA players are until you see their height listed in metric, haha! 2.1 meters, eh? Holy crap he’s tall!

    Not to get get too off topic, but it’s funny how I’m so used to imperial. I guess its because so many countries don’t use the metric system (http://m.mentalfloss.com/article.php?id=55895). Oh wait…

  2. A Hill O' Beans says:
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    You don’t realize how tall NBA players are until you see their height listed in metric, haha! 2.1 meters, eh? Holy crap he’s tall!

    Not to get too off topic, but it’s funny how I’m so used to imperial despite living in Canada. I guess it’s because so many countries don’t use the metric system. Oh, wait…

    http://m.mentalfloss.com/article.php?id=55895

    (apologize if this is a duplicate comment as my last one didn’t seem to show up)

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @A Hill O’ Beans: Hah they automatically went to Spam… Stupid WordPress… Yeah Slim made me chuckle on that one!

      Hey, those Colonists held a big grudge, enough to invent a whole new measurement system!

      • A Hill O' Beans says:
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        @JB Gilpin: That may be the first time I’ve ever seen an NBA players height in metric, I was like, what the hell is that, haha.

        I like the story at the bottom of that link about the one guy who worked for the US Metric Program. One guy in charge of trying to convert the entire country to a different form of measurement. Yeah, that’ll work.

        Back on topic. Who’s your favourite fantasy guy outside of those top 7 picks? There’s sooooo much meh after that point.

        Also, I think you’re selling Tyler Ulis short (or tall I guess). I hear his combine measurements were 5’8″ and 149lbs (not 5’10” / 160lbs)!! That’s 1.7m and 68kg, which oddly doesn’t sound as bad…

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @A Hill O’ Beans: Yeah at first I was like, “what in the hell Slim, where’d you get THAT info from” but then I got the joke 🙂

          Hah yeah… poor guy in just some deadend job…

          Yup very meh. Valentine definitely sticks out for the out of position assists. I’m no Spartans fan, but I like Deyotna Davis too for blocks, but I dunno if he gets much of a role. Slim seems to like Ellenson a lot…

          Holy crap that’s small! I went from draftxpress I think… Wow 68 kg sounds tiny though, but us silly US citizens don’t know what that means!

  3. A Hill O' Beans says:
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    Do you not allow urls/links in comments anymore? None of my comments with links seem to be showing up (nor do they say awaiting moderation or anything)….

      • A Hill O' Beans says:
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        @JB Gilpin: Yeah I know I’ve used them before, thought I was just losing it or something, haha

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @A Hill O’ Beans: Yeah spam I guess ate up that other commenters comments that said he had the same issue… Although with all your fantasy titles lately, I think you might be a robot

  4. Bryce Krispie Treats says:
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    JB, you see any scenario where the wolves draft Hield? Boy, would I like to see him, KAT, and Wiggy together… I guess I just dont know much about Jamal Murray though.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Bryce Krispie Treats: Ummmm, I guess it’s “possible”, but that gives them a second Shabazz Muhammad kinda? Murray is also kinda a shooter/scorer, but I think more upside. They “could” go Dunn as well since Lavine is pretty much only a PG now, but that would be giving up on Tyus Jones pretty quick…

  5. Ryan says:
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    With the third pick of the 2016 Draft, the Boston Celtics select Bender Rodriguez!!! Promise me that steady Futurama references will be a thing if he ever becomes fantasy relevant.

    About that sign and trade: NO! BAD SLIM! NO!

    I just can’t see it happening and really hope it doesn’t. I’m assuming a sign and trade entails Atlanta using its Bird rights to give him the 5yr max?

    Thing is, I doubt any GM is willing to give him that deal. They’d have to be crazy to do it. The dude is 30 after all, and relies on his athleticism much more than others at his position…

    I like Sabonis, but I rather me some Taurean Prince at 16! A 3&D wing that can guard multiple positions would be awesome. I’m down with Zizac at 23. Him and Zhou are near the top of my wish list as draft and stash candidates. ANTE UP!

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @Ryan: They have to! He’s Bender, insert alcohol!

      I think the Celtics need to do something to get an above avg big man. Horford till he’s 35 is a terrible idea for sure, but I think someone’s gonna do it or the 4 yr max maybe. The added 3pt shot has got to make his “value” go up even more I would assume. Would you rather sign Biyombo for $15-$17 mil a year and gain no offense?

      We both seem to have the stash big men organized as Zubak, Zizik, Zhou. There’s a joke in there somewhere but I don’t know nearly enough words starting in Z to make it.

      • Ryan says:
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        Oh I def prefer Horford. His skillset is just what we need, and like you said, Biyombo provides no offense. Boston is in a position to overpay, but I still don’t want to give Al a guaranteed 5 yr max. I’d be reluctant to even give him four, and I’m hoping common sense persuades most GM’s into feeling the same way. I wouldn’t be too shocked if a team like POR, HOU, or BKN gave him a 4yr max though…

        If I’m right about nobody wanting to sign him for 5yrs, then perhaps a S&T could be done while giving up some assets of lesser value. I’m sure the Celtics could offer a package without the BKN picks that would still beat other teams’ offers.

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @Slim: @Ryan: Futurama references unfortunately go right over my head… That’ll have to be a Slim thing!

          I dunno, Horford starting to shoot 3s, it’s not like he’s an Ibaka leaper… I think it could work. And I’m usually conservative thinking of deals, so I think he’s def getting his $$$$$.

          Draft is going to be a good one for teams needing zee big men! Like instead of “the”… I’m just back from vacation, I need to work on it!

  6. Dante Green says:
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    Any chance my Suns draft another pointguard?? HAHAHA it’s been a running joke in the Suns community since a couple years ago. Lol

    I wonder who might be Jeff Hornacek’s PJ Tucker in New York. I mean the guy who for some reason keeps playing a ton of minutes, even though he does not necessarily need to. Lol

    Lovin the Dantoni hiring. But how much more can Harden’s numbers improve under Mike? I mean he’s already been a beast these past 2 years! I hope I could land him on draft night! But at #5? Geez The owner of the #1 pick is a huge Spurs fan, if he screws up and takes Leonard with his first overall, then there will be a chance I get to steal Harden. Lol But I don’t see anything wrong with drafting Towns at 5 either so I’m fine Hah

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @Dante Green: The Suns are going to draft Ulis, then trade him to the Celtics.

      You mean Carmelo doesn’t count? Ohhhhhhh, Melo burn!

      I can’t imagine any system will effect Harden. He does his thing regardless. What happens at PF is the big question, you got to imagine whoever gets it will probably play big minutes. Terrence Jones top 50 again?! Didn’t D’Antoni and Howard not exactly get along? I think we can assume Howard is going to opt out and not come back.

      • MAC says:
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        @Slim: hahaha! nyc one on melo!

        d antonis system definitely bodes well for hardens value thats for xur. hes basically HOU PG, and we all know what that means in pringles system. i agree, whoever gets the PF min. or it might as well be ariza there playing the matrix role with. definitely targeting capela next season. no question howard will not be with the rockets next season.

        • Slim

          Slim says:
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          @MAC: Capela better work on his FT shooting. I’m going to struggle to endorse him on a non punt team.

          • MAC says:
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            @Slim: capela is definitely a punt ft target. adams would be a more suitable pick for those not punting ft. but both are great targets late.

            • JB Gilpin

              JB Gilpin says:
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              @Dante Green: @Slim: @MAC: Hahahaha, yeah PG is a HUGE need!

              Ohhhhhhh T Jones with a new coach in that system! Def queue the hype. Or is it cue the hype…?

              Mmmmmmmm, $1 REL Capela… Yummy

  7. Chris says:
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    Thon maker, sixers draft him at 24!!!!

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @Chris: He is sooooo sixers! But not outlandish, unfortunately I don’t know what he looks like against good competition. He will certainly be someone to watch during summer league.

      • JB Gilpin

        JB Gilpin says:
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        @Chris: @Slim: Hahaha yeah, they need ANOTHER 7 footer haha

    • Lasandro says:
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      A Hill O’ Beans: Still in shock man. Just read this post too and saw JB mentioning him in the section about NOP. Damn. Sad and under very suspect cirumstances. Just came outta surgery recently, too.

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @A Hill O’ Beans: Yeah this is really sad. Kid had his entire life ahead of him.

      • JB Gilpin

        JB Gilpin says:
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        @A Hill O’ Beans: @Lasandro: @Slim: Yeah saw that while I was away… Very very sad and a crazy thing… Makes you wonder about gun control again, but that said, a big strong dude yelling and breaking in at 3:30 AM would be scary. No good sides or ways about it, very sad.

  8. Lasandro says:
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    Trading places is prob my fav comedy of all time. Love the Billy-Ray ref!

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Lasandro: Hah that movie is soooooo good! Glad that got a laugh 🙂

  9. Ben says:
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    Where do you think diamond stone gets drafted?

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @Ben: If you mean team I have no idea… but it is possible he sneaks into the late 1st round, but more than likely I’d guess early 2nd round. He has the potential to be a steal though. He could go to the Spurs at 29, I think that would be a nice landing spot for him.

      • JB Gilpin

        JB Gilpin says:
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        @Ben: @Slim: Yeah he seems to be right at that fringe, I dunno if I could see him going much higher than 30. Likely 2nd round to me

  10. Alex says:
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    Maybe it’s just me, but there’s a duane casey on the pelicans?

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @Alex: Hehe. Someone was watching too much Raptors…

      • JB Gilpin

        JB Gilpin says:
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        @Alex: @Slim: Hahahaha oops… Thanks for the catch! Why doing content during the playoffs is too confusing!

  11. Slim

    Slim says:
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    I can not STAND talking to casual basketball fans about the Warriors. I call Draymond their best player and people look at me like I’ve got 3 heads. I hope he wins finals MVP just so people will actually acknowledge his existance. Man its frustrating.

    • Threekola says:
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      @Slim:

      Slim…you sure you meant “best” lol? Even I’d look at you like you had three heads.

      Second best, probably, all star, top 10-15 player right now, top 2 defensive, yes yes yes yes. Better than curry? Nooooo.

      • Slim

        Slim says:
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        @Threekola: I know… no shortage of hyperbole. I guess I just get annoyed that the casual fan doesn’t even seem to know who he is.

        • Threekola says:
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          @Slim: They’re not worth it slim…THEY’RE NOT WORTH IT

          • Slim

            Slim says:
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            @Threekola: I called Draymond a shooter before Game 1 of the finals and these casual fans thought I was stupid. I said he scores 10-12 ppg and they thought I had no idea what I was talking about. I didn’t want to go into the difference between a shooter and a scorer but I’m sure they are all eating their words this morning! Draymond is lapping the field in finals MVP votes.

            • JB Gilpin

              JB Gilpin says:
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              @Threekola: @Slim: Andrew Bogut is CLEARLY the best player on that team. Wait. I mean Marreese Speights. THE ACE OF SPEIGHTS!

              #OccupyDraymondGreen baby!

    • Lasandro says:
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      @Slim @Threekola @JB Gilpin: Honestly, I’ve been just as incredulous discussing him amongst my friends. Dude IS the best player. I don’t quite know why offensive ability has all of a sudden taken over as the go-to prerequisite of making a player “the best”. Surely there’s a reason why an offensive stud like Harden was left outta all 3 All-NBA teams, right?When MJ was “the best”, he wasn’t just a destructive offensive player, but his D was all world.

      Curry is the absolute best shooter ever, handles the ball like only 1 or 2 others can, and passes it very well. I’d say Dray is very good to elite in a few more areas constituting the overall basketball player. His passing, defense and rebounding all range from very good to elite. He’s a good shooter. At-level a passer as Steph. I understand how most would pick Steph over him, but the conversation shouldn’t be as outlandish as most want it to be.

      Fantasy-wise, of course Steph reigns supreme. Just talking real-life ball here. I just think it’s much harder finding a guy like Draymond than it is Steph, in today’s NBA. Every guard wants to shoot, score and handle. Draymond is unlike anyone we’ve seen before (as is Steph for his shooting), in that he ticks so many boxes on both ends of the court. High volume scoring aside: a guy like G Hill comes to mind, but he wasn’t near the defender Dray is (until his PHO days, at least). Pippen and Marion were beasts but didnt pass it like Dray. Elite KG and the Gasols (in their elite days) contribute all over the place too (passing included… sorry Duncan). LBJ is still the best player out there, but Dray’s overall D trumps his.

      So yeah, i think Dray is the better player in GSW. My two cents/rupees/dong. Keep discussing – I love this shit!

      • MAC says:
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        @Lasandro: i get what everyones saying bout draymond, but cmon, curry is the best player in their team. but draymond is definitely the next one. as much as unique of a player draymond is, you just cant say its easier to find another steph. i mean, FANTASY WISE, has there been a player who drains 5 treys a game? then he freaking shoots 50% FG! with the volume of 3s he attempts and the attention of the defense on him. thats absurd. REAL-LIFE ball, just stepping in the court, the way curry attracts the D, along with klay out there, thats why draymond get those so open 3s and some dimes. the way those 2 opens up the court is unreal. i mean, i guess the cavs would rather give up dunks than 3s to those two. defensively, dray definitely is the anchor. that why there is a so called death line up because of him. no doubt, its the defense where dray stands out. as much as steph being solid defensively, theres a reason klay guards other teams PG. thats why this team is so great, the way they are constructed.

        i get it why everyones all praise on dray, and he is a tad underrated. but curry getting all the attention, i mean literally on the court, he gets all the attention, that opens up the court for everyone offensively should not be discounted.

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @Lasandro: @MAC: Camon guys, make 3s, nice smile, score a lot of points = best player. WE ALL KNOW THIS!

          Def think Dray is underrated, but while he’s an awesome all-around player and elite in his own regard, Curry is a once-in-a-generation guy. I’m with MAC. It’s maybe not “outlandish” but this is some crazy ball from Curry.

          Also wouldn’t hurt if Dray could become an 85% FT shooter too 🙂

        • Lasandro says:
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          @MAC @JB Gilpin: Good points all round! Don’t discount Dray’s smile, now. If smiling were a fantasy stat, Dwight would be a top 2 pick.

          Steph is truly a once in a generation offensive player, yes. This is a tough argument because as @MAC rightfully points out, the team is constructed so damn well. Now if Dray and Steph were the alphas on a lesser team, it’d be easier to compare. But as it stands, I’m willing to concede that Steph is perhaps their best player, but Dray is their most valuable? And I say this because you still have outside shooting with Klay, and those guards coming off the bench can really hurt the opposition. Harder to replace what Draymond brings, on that current roster.

          • MAC says:
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            @Lasandro: haha! but still, even dwights smile seems forced.

            well, i dont get it with statements like that. i mean, your best player should be your most valuable. but, i get what your saying. and i cant argue with that. when steph was out for a couple of games in the reg season, gsw won both while i think dray missed a game which they lost. and in the playoffs, it was evident that their team can hold the fort while steph was out.

            maybe a good example would be the 90s bulls. when MJ retired, the bulls were still a 55 win team. it really showed how truly special of a player pippen was. they advanced in the second round b4 losing to the eventual east champs knicks in 7.

          • Lasandro says:
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            @MAC: Yeah man that 90’s Bulls comp is on point. Pippen was never asked to be that elite scorer but was very capable of putting up 30 on any given night. Whats another one?… I was gonna bring up Nash but that’d be silly because every bloody play was run through him in PHO haha. You take him outta that system and STAT and Marion wouldn’t have scored nearly as much.

            Going through the list of guys from the last 20yrs, most of the MVPs HAVE been the best players on their squad (eg. KG, Duncan, Bron, Rose..ew). Guess, for me, this is the first time where I feel that there’s an argument that the best overall player on the best team didn’t get the MVP. Hope Bron wins it next year so there’s no doubt who the best player is anymore. Unless KAT takes a leap in his 2nd year, of course 😉

  12. OldMilwaukeePounders says:
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    JB/Slim,

    There seems to be some rumblings throughout Rip City analysts about the Blazers jumping in to the draft either at the end of round 1 or very early round 2…I’m pulling for them to make a stash pick or even someone like Thon, I would like to see what he is all about and might as well be in the Blazers organization in my opinion.

    Thoughts?

    • Slim

      Slim says:
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      @OldMilwaukeePounders: I guess it isn’t impossible. They have a few guys with solid trade value. I’m rooting more for a big free agent signing. Didn’t they offer a max deal to Kanter? I think they try something like that again. Please no Howard… Please!

      • OldMilwaukeePounders says:
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        @Slim: Agreed, no Howard! There are many folks here in town rooting for it, I’m not one of that crowd… I’d love for them to try to get Whiteside on a max deal. We’ll see, so far I have only heard of them getting in to the draft. No other interesting rumors.

        There was some talk about CJ being “the only trade asset”, terrible, terrible sports talk opinions out here, man.

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @Slim: @OldMilwaukeePounders: Yeah I think the Blazers have money to burn, after Kanter fell through they were kinda like, “aight, we’ll just punt 15-16”. Then they were a playoff team. I bet a LOT of free agents would love going there.

          Heh? CJ traded?!?!??! Haha, yeah I like going after Whiteside a TON. Great shooters around him, gives them a rock at C, could even play Plum at PF, but the FT shooting could be an issue, even though Hassan showed a big improvement last yr

          • OldMilwaukeePounders says:
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            @JB Gilpin: I’m on the Whiteside to PDX bandwagon all the way, JB. Not sure what else will happen.

            I am assuming they are going to lock up CJ to an extension, sign Harkless, Crabbe, and Meyers Leonard (I think all 3 are RFA’s). Beyond that I am not sure what they can possibly do in this off-season. Maybe Horford? I’d rather have Hassan though, even if his FT shooting is a slight concern. Can’t see them getting a worthwhile SF unless they try to lure Harrison Barnes away with pretty big money…I have to think that Harkless earned a long term role with her versatility, he could take a big step forward still in my opinion.

            Mostly I’m concerned with them getting the “buy in” from who ever they bring in. The team worked well because everyone played “the system” to a t.

            • A Hill O' Beans says:
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              @JB Gilpin: @Slim: @OldMilwaukeePounders: I think Whiteside would be a great fit there. If he doesn’t get talked in to going back to Miami on a discount (not sure why he would since this is his first pay day) then they should have as good a chance as anyone to get him.

              “I have to think that Harkless earned a long term role with her versatility”

              I guess Harkless has earned a long term role, but clearly “he” hasn’t earned much respect, haha.

              • OldMilwaukeePounders says:
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                @A Hill O’ Beans: Ha! Nice catch on that one. I’m just trying to motivate him!

                • JB Gilpin

                  JB Gilpin says:
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                  @OldMilwaukeePounders: @A Hill O’ Beans: @OldMilwaukeePounders: Haha, ummmm, Crabbe I def could see, I dunno about Meyers… I guess he’s a good fit next to Plumlee or Whiteside as a stretch 4. I’m not a big Harkless guy, but that isn’t the worst spot. I def don’t think H Barnes is worth it, I would be sad if he went there.

                  Get her motivated!

  13. Foreign Affairs says:
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    Very nice mock guys, though you’ve missed out on my sleeper lol, so far so good for me thing keeping him underwraps till the draft. Also you’ve almost sold me on Ellenson Slim, I had absolutely no interest in him going into this but Toronto is so bad at pf that I thought Bennett might crack the rotation so there could be something there.

    Oh please let Buddy go to the Pelicans I don’t think there’s a limit to what I would spend on him in the Auction if that happens. Also I’m really hoping it goes 1-2 like that because while im puking looking at that depth chart as a Embiid and Saric owner, Ingram on the Lakers is just to good for my Clarkson and Russell.

    I think your underrating Sabonis, I might be blinded by liking his dad, only if he came to the nba before he was a 31 year old rookie. But I think he could be Tristan Thompson or Kenneth Faried with less athleticism but better height and the ability to actually shoot the basketball. But which team he lands on is going to be really important just like with Skal and Bender.

    Im thinking this draft is actually being underrated like the 2011 draft because there is not a lot of ready to go guys right away but like back then there is a lot of guys with great talent but very obvious holes that would get in the way of their development if they don’t end up on the right team, besides Jan Vesely(European Blake Griffin) and Jimmer…not sure any team could have saved those two.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Foreign Affairs: Thanks man! Hah, not gonna tell us your sleeper?! REL def make you protective!

      Yeah I mean, it’s mean tough to just throw it in, but losing after the very sad news for Bryce, SF is more a need for them. Ingram def fits nice next to those Lakers G.

      Yeah for sure, Russia messed him up for sure by not letting him heal right. Maybe he could be a little better than I projected, but I dunno about doing much this year.

      Hah yeah I LOVE it for dynasty prospecting. A lot of guys you can stash.

      • Foreign Affairs says:
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        @JB Gilpin:

        haha well i’ll probably spill the beans at some point not being able to resist lol, but to give a hint some of the projections for the type of player he can be is similar to a few of your favorite youngsters for fantasy that perhaps have a glaring hole thats best to be ignored lol.

        It really sucks with Bryce for that team I felt like you guys had been spot on with him and looking at the depth chart after the fact now, its just so bad at sf-sg-pg, worst medical staff i’ve ever seen.

        For Sabonis for me it really depends on were he ends up for what style of play they have and how there record at development is, because I was following him last year as well and he’s made huge strides compared to last season were he had poor range and now bumped his ft% up to 76% on 5.5 attempts and has started to show alittle 3 point range, not much but massive progress from last year. I think a better comp now that I think about it is Luis Scola(God my Raptors suck at PF) I think he could turn into that type of player.

        Not going to take a fantasy team to greatness but the kind of solid player that you would want to plug into front court and not worry about him tanking your team in any categories.

        Hahah agreed I’m going to have to debate about either keeping my really cheap uncertain roleplayers or trying and stashing abunch of these guys especially the pile of Foreign big man prospects this year..though watching the finals I can tell you that Shumperts getting shipped off my team.

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