Now, I never went to a boarding school… I was stuck in the public schooling circuit, and just could never rebound. I was like Andrea Bargnani or Brook Lopez down there. Domineering over some little men, but the boards just never came my way… Enter J.J. Hickson, who despite being a tad undersized has always been a solid boarder, and racked up 19 last night for an 18/19 night. Near Goromotaro! Just one putback slammah-jammah and he’s seeing 20/20. A little laser eye surgery. I liked Hickson a lot when JaVale McGee went down, and he’s proved he needs to be owned virtually everywhere like I said 8 days ago. In the five games since, Hickson has at least 8 boards, double-figures in four of five, and a block every night. Even if Shaqtin-a-McGee is able to get back within his original time frame, McGee just isn’t able to play the big starter’s minutes and Hickson is going to maintain this value either starting at the 5 or playing out his minutes as an early sub. If you’re hurtin’ for boards, be sure the recent grad from the boarding school isn’t sitting on your wire. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Things were looking oh so good for the Colonel’s original recipe heading into the season. I bought the whole bucket, the two sides and a giant big gulp of tea. But Larry Sanders could very well be one of fantasy’s biggest disappointments in 2013-14, for reasons on and off the court.
Sanders signed a 4-year deal in the offseason worth a cool $44 million bucks (worth, about, a million buckets of chicken!), and the Bucks regime had big plans for their center. GM John Hammond, while trying to keep his Jurassic Park island under control, said Sanders was the key to the team. Hammond, you lost your keys! Bucks are locked out… Then the season started with Sanders nearly fouling out in 12 minutes, and in three games hasn’t played more than 22 minutes, hit 2 FGs, or grabbed more than 4 boards. I was on the buy low bandwagon faster than a short sell in Trading Places. But after complaining about playing time, Sanders reportedly got into a bar fight Saturday night and effed up his thumb. Stop giving him roids, Braun, we don’t need more roid rage in Milwaukee! I wonder if he was getting hazed by Ersan Ilyasova like Richie Incognito. ”You must play better, now!” yells Ersan in a thick Turkish accident. Hey, Ilyasova was a scratch last night too, Gus Ayonin’! Anyway, Sanders is accused of breaking champagne bottles over peoples’ heads, and to top if off he then missed Monday’s game because his wife went into labor. Sorry Larry Sanders Jr… I’m just sorry… Hopefully this version of The Larry Sanders Show ends anti-climatically with Sanders getting back on the court and giving fantasy owners something. If you’ve got him, you have to be holding and hoping Sanders can settle down and have this blow over, before he’s looking back at his life and he’s Robert Swift. Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Coming into this year, the fantasy freaks of the world had two guys on their radar as far as Phoenix Suns centers. Would it be one-time fantasy darling and all-the-time Polish Hammer Marcin Gortat, or lottery pick Alex Len, who could either end up as a modern-day Jon Koncak or a white Dwight Howard.
How about neither? Gortat was traded to the Washington Cheese Wiz in a very odd trade where the Suns ended up with a protected first-round pick and a frozen-in-Carbonite Emeka Okafor – which really isn’t that different than Emeka Okafor – while the ex-Bullets got Gortat and three guys they waived.
Len, meanwhile, is injured, and won’t be ready even when he’s ready, if that makes any sense.
And all of this is perfectly fine in the retirement capital of the world.Please, blog, may I have some more?
There comes a time in every man’s life when he must admit defeat. Like when your girlfriend demands to know why you can’t just remember to put the toilet seat down. You can try to explain to her that the house is haunted and you would never be so inconsiderate. From experience I must say its not as convincing as it sounds in your head. The only correct response is to hang your head in shame and say, “I’m sorry”. Older bench players like Mo Williams and Nate Robinson are my toilet seats. I can’t seem to put them down and I will undoubtedly hang my head in shame when I do finally drop them. Why not skip that uncomfortable feeling all together? Why not take an unknown player who may blossom into a fantasy star? Here are a couple of bigs that I believe will outperform players like Omer Asik (63% owned), Samuel Dalembert (52% owned), and Luis Scola (42% owned).Please, blog, may I have some more?
The period of free agency continues to shape the fantasy basketball-scape with fresh meat on terrible teams and players signing with contenders to be relegated to bench duty. With baseball in full swing and the NFL getting half of the ESPN air time no matter what time of year it is, a lot of NBA moves have been made under the radar. Look for every division to get a team-by-team breakdown and some early fantasy thoughts on the new faces in new places:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’ve heard an incredible buzz surrounding the All-Star Game, which is amazing considering the last person who enjoyed an all-star game died in 1997. Well, I hope the ASG has reinvigorated people’s interest in basketball. For those who like to press their luck and test their skill, DraftKings has an amazing contest going on.Please, blog, may I have some more?
You want an early buy (or a repeat)? Throw down some nickels and make a purchase of one Tyler Zeller. His 16 points yesterday were the first since January 19, but the 9 rebounds, 4 assists and a block were not out of the ordinary. He’s had a block in five straight games, is averaging 7 rebounds in the past six games, and has 3 or 4 assists in four games this month. I wouldn’t own him for offense, but he could help you in many other ways. Let him inspire your fantasy team! WAH…TUH!Please, blog, may I have some more?
In a mere 27 minutes, Samuel Dalembert had 35 points on 17-21 shooting, notched 12 rebounds, dished out 2 and blocked 1. Slammy Sammy has been Silent Sammy for most of the year, with a 14/13 game on January 30 and 12/10 in January 29 being the highlights of the year.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Pau Gasol and the Lakers have had a train wreck of a season so far. Pau is seeing nearly all his numbers being below career average (12.6/8.9/3.5/0.5/1.2 with 42% FG and 76% FT) and having “knee tendinitis” to boot. As such, I had to move him down in the tiers because you can’t be a Victoria’s Secret model with those type of numbers.Please, blog, may I have some more?
One thing I absolutely hate, I mean really despise, is when teams relocate. I think it’s a giant middle finger to fans and a blemish on the legacy of the team. That also leads to bizarre team names, like the Lakers in L.A.Please, blog, may I have some more?