As a very fair skinned, freckly and tall guy (makes me closer to the sun) I have had my problems beating the heat.  One time in college (I went to UNCW so on the beach) I got burnt so bad on my legs it made me get shaky and more loopy than Joseph Gordon-Levitt. My friends thought I pulled an Ewan McGregor and snuck in some heroin. Suffice to say, I got some serious additional freckling on my calves.  With their long slender shape and pretty much invisible blonde hairs, I could pass them off as Lindsay Lohan’s legs.  Enough celebrity mentions already!

Unfortunately for the Celtics, St. Patty’s didn’t carry on into Monday night as the Heat led by LeBron James’ 37-7-12 (including this abuse of Jason Terry) were able to keep the streak alive at 23.  Although the city of Boston probably would have gotten blackout drunk again either way.  With no Kevin Garnett, the C’s gave another start to Jeff Green who exploded his green-ness on the Heat like Nickelodeon gak.  He was the Green Monstah last night, going for a career-high 43 with 5 3PTM, 7 Rebs, 2 Asts, 2 Stls, and 4 Blks.  Easily one of the best fantasy lines of the year for who is becoming a huge pickup for owners who nabbed him.  Speaking of getting nabbed, check out this guy nabbing a few boogers on national TV. Proves you can do anything if you have the charm. Just look at that wink with the debonair of Mark Harmon/Dennis Quaid.  I thought no more celebrity references!

Let’s take a look at what else went down last night across the NBA:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Every year, there’s a handful of guys that are waiver wire whores and bounce back and forth between owners for spot starts.  It’s like the freshman co-ed dorm; you feel entitled if you’re the first to have one of em riding your roster, but then you feel dirty if you claimed them next.  Enter Jarrett Jack, who before settling into his probable NBA 6th Man Award role, got run off the bench, then a few starts, but never those solidified minutes.  A shoulder injury a few weeks back had the last round of owners jumping ship, but since returning he’s finally ready for a long term commitment. So what if he gave rival owners a little handsy here and rub-a-dub there?  Time for everyone to lock him up Elizabeth Smart style.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I don’t care who you are, if you are able to get a triple double then you deserve some praise.  Well, unless it’s one of those triple doubles with 10 turnovers.  Jordan Crawford has been inserted into the starting lineup and has been a plus player in just about every category (not FG%).  Last night he went for 27 points, 11 rebounds, 11 assists and a scorching 5 of 10 from behind the arc.  Last week I wrote that you should pick him up if you can handle the FG% hit.  If he’s still on your wire, stop reading and go pick him up.  Even if you can’t take the hit, just pick him up and trade him to someone else.  He will be a valuable player this year.  Here’s what else happened around the NBA last night:

Devin Harris – Got the start, yay!  Played only 14 minutes, boo!  8 points, 1 assist, 1 steal, yuck!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Andre Iguodala has been a source of contention in the comments recently.  Some people just want to cast him aside and leave him for dead (I may be exaggerating slightly).  Not me.  No man left behind is my motto (unless your name is Andrew Bynum, to hell with that guy).  Especially a man that was a top 50 player last year.  A man who once only hurt you in FT% and contributed across the board everywhere else.  This year he is not the same man.  A career low in FG%, REB, STL, and a nearly career high in TO’s (not to mention his lowest AST since ’05-’06).  Perhaps it is the high altitude, or maybe he is declining at the old age of 28 years.  I say that’s hogwash and I’m not sure why I say it like that, because I sound like my 80 year old grandmother.  Nevertheless, I firmly believe that he will figure out his role on the Nuggets and you should own him before he does.  Well, unless you can’t take that FT% hit.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

In Kyrie Irving’s first game back from injury, he helped the Cavs beat the Lakers.  Surprised?  You shouldn’t be, because the Lakers stink right now.  Now a confession… the headline was lying.  Now are you surprised?  Irving punished the Lakers going 28/6/11/1 with four 3PM and shooting 11-21 from the field.  Now that he has shaken off the rust, we should expect him to score 100 points in his next game.  Sorry that’s irrational me.  Rational me says if you own Irving then be very happy, and if you traded for him, then make fun of the owner that traded him to you immediately.  Like right now.  DO IT NOW.  Yikes!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Nothing excites me more than a player who contributes a little bit of everything, yet isn’t particularly strong in any particular area of the game. You know, those quiet players you slot in your utility position who bolster several statistical categories but ask for little in return.  Well Gordon Hayward is one of those unsung ballers.

Please, blog, may I have some more?