Ya know, the Lakers deserved to lose like that last night. After building a solid lead against the Wizards, the Purp and Gold collapsed yet again… And they didn’t play my boy or fan-favorite Tarik Black! I find this an atrocity… Gonna be about 30 straight losses at this rate!
But as much as I want to rant about Black, that would be a pretty weak open… So the next best ranty Lakers subject has to be Wayne Ellington‘s crazy game, putting up a 28/3/3/3/0 line on 12-20 FG (3-9 3PTM 1-1 FT). Sell if you can! No Nick Young last night as he’s dealing with a minor ankle injury from practice on top of being in the doghouse. Swaggy Peed on the carpet! We all know Swaggy never touched a basketball he didn’t think he could shoot, and that will sap into Ellington’s future upside. I could see some interesting buzziness floating around Wayne given Kobe Bryant‘s shoulder fell off, so if any deeper league owners are interested and you can get a value, I’m down like
Byron Scott a clown. That said, he’s out there in a ton of league fa free (9% owned last night when I grabbed him in an RCL), so maybe you get a couple hot games before you Sellington. Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:
Rodney Stuckey – Stuckeying hoops all game last night! 22/7/2 on 8-16 shooting. That said, no steals, no treys and 3 TO. But while George Hill remains on a 20ish MPG limit, Stuckey has some stream/bottom end roster spot in 12er appeal that a lot of people hopped off of, and understandably so. Two straight good ones and a hot wife is enough to cloud my judgement… I’m like a scout from Moneyball!
Jonas Valanciunas – Ya know, he really is starting to remind me of a C version of Trey Burke. LL slam! 6/8/0/0/1, battled some foul trouble, and just isn’t a consistent fantasy asset. He was on a solid four-game roll, but disappeared the two before that. Maybe we should change Luminescent Lithuanian to Strobe Light Lithuanian…
Patrick Patterson – Near rainbow for Pit-Pat! 13/3/3/2/1 with no TO and hit a couple of treys. He had a mad lull for a stretch there, but has some sexy low-TO, multi-cat appeal the past 5 games.
Kyrie Irving – Damn you Slim! I wanted Irving, but it ended up being a push in our 30-Point Challenge anyway… 38/3/6/3/1 on 13-23 FG (6-10 3PTM 6-6 FT). Tore Augustin apart! Man the Pistons must be scratching their heads that they’re missing Brandon Jennings‘ DEFENSE!
LeBron James – He’s pretty good at basketball. That said, FG% is way down and he’s at a career-worst 4.0 TO a game. A 4.0 that isn’t good for your GPA!
J.R. Smith – I feel like owners who picked him up should pull a Debbie Downer. “It’s like that time I ignored JB who said he was terrible, then I went to the Cavs game in Detroit last night and he missed so bad it hit me in the 2nd row in the abdomen and now I have internal bleeding…” Womp womp!
Kevin Love – 7/8/4/0/0 on 3-11 shooting. Rock bottom and you can’t try to buy low in H2H with that playoff schedule! The Cavs slate weeks 21-23 is as empty as his stats…
D.J. Augustin – Other than letting Uncle Drew slap him silly, D.J. was solid for 19/4/9/2/0 with three treys. Did have 5 TO, but hey, you’ll take this D.J.’s hot beats.
Andre Drummond – Trying to pull a Whiteside! 12/17/0/0/6. 0-4 FT too! That’s so Drummo…
Anthony Tolliver – Please sir, I want s’more! Led the Pistons in bench minutes for 16/4/2 and 3 treys. ThrAGNOF!
Zaza Pachulia – Only played 21 minutes… Man the Bucks went small! Especially with John Henson going for only 18 off the bench. Hey, it worked for a comeback W, so there’s that…
Khris Middleton – The Duchess! Another 17 points and 3 treys in a 17/3/1/1/0 line. Three straight really solid games and deserves every single minute.
Jerryd Bayless – JB taking over the world! 15/4/7 on 6-8 FG with a trey. Really put the Bucks on his back during the comeback. That was like a rap lyric! Except I rhymed back with comeback… Lazy like Rick Ross! 4 straight solid outings with 5+ dimes in each, but it’s really hard to expect lengthy consistency.
Dwyane Wade – More hamstrings, mo problems. Strained his “other” hamstring than the one he jacked up before, which leaves him with a net of zero healthy hamstrings. I just could not hop onto this bumpy road…
Mario Chalmers – “I love ballin’ Wade-less!” 21/2/8/0/1, and even though his stint a few games ago without Wade didn’t go great, he’s still a solid medium-term must-add for me.
Hassan Whiteside – Hassanity continues! No blocks, but hey, a 16/16/1/1/0 line is just fine, especially since he went 4-4 from the stripe. And hugely encouraging is the 36 minutes as the starter with Chris Anderson out with tattoo soreness.
Jeff Green – More blah. 8/5/2/0/0 with a couple of treys. Unlike Ruby Rhod, he’s not super green.
Beno Udrih – Was playing decent (8/2/5) filling in for Mike Conley, but Nick Calathes ended up getting more run off the bench for 13/5/2/2/0 in 27 minutes. Conley suited up but wasn’t needed in a 19 point win, and should be back Thursday.
Rajon Rondo – Pretty boring game from the Mavs, with Rondo notching a 7/7/5/2/0 line and 3 TO. The Mavericks might be the most boring 30-16 team – in fantasy terms that is – in recent history… I mean, I guess some of those Spurs teams would have a horse in that race.
Derrick Rose – What a terrible, terrible game. But Rose hits a step-back in OT to hit 30 Pts exactly! Woooo, didn’t lose my lead over Slim in the 30-Point Challenge! Rose was a horrific 13-33 from the field, and the biggest eyesore of them all – 11 TO! And the Bulls won! At Golden State! And Rose only had one assist! Such a weird, bad game. Sure a little added pressure with Jimmy Butler sitting (sick), but H2H teams are certainly going to lose TO this week after that kiss from the Rose… Luckily the rest of the Bulls were on…
Pau Gasol – Near tripdub! 18/16/8/0/4. His reemergence at age 34 after that vertigo scare last year has been one of the bigger breakouts to me.
Joakim Noah – Welcome back to usability! If you bought low, you’re looking golden now! Buy low in a 30 cents on the dollar, draft day value kinda way… 18/15/6/2/0 as the Bulls interior shoved around the Warriors.
Nikola Mirotic – Look at those minutes! 31 off the bench for 12/7/1/1/0, but a lot of that is the Butler effect. Not looking too much into it.
David Lee – No Andrew Bogut last night (last minute scratch with flu-like symptoms), and Lee flashed some 2009 skillz! 24/9/6 on 10-17 FG and 4-4 FT. No steals or blocks, and he only had 22 points the previous 4 games. Bogut isn’t dealing with one of his typical myriad of injuries and should be back soon, so no change of value for Lee there.
Klay Thompson – ThrAGNOF king can board! 30/10/2/1/0 with 4 treys and three straight 30+ point games. Can’t be stopped!
Jordan Clarkson – Nice bounce back for the rook. 18/3/3/1/0, and as the numbers suggest, he’s a shoot-first PG without much vision out there. Nice to see only the one TO, but I don’t know how often he’s going to get 18 shots. It was a sexy first half though, don’t get me wrong!
Robert Sacre – Really, Byron? Sacre? 29 starting minutes, sure he nearly rainbowed for 6/8/1/2/2, but shot 3-9 and is terrible. Once I perfect my time travel machine, I’m going to go back in time and tell Scott to start Black for those 29 starting minutes and the Lakers will win.
John Wall – Even closer tripdub alert! 21/9/13/3/0 on 8-12 FG. Really weird 5-12 FT, and when I’m giving Byron Scott some tips whilst time traveling, I might mention to Wall to take a couple extra practice freebies in shoot around. He came in a little iffy with a bad Achilles that may have contributed, and contrary to our friends at Rotoworld and their blurb, Wall was gimpy in the final minute. Staying tuned here.
Otto Porter – Got the start for Paul Pierce (toe – call the toe truck!), and looked solid in 30 minutes even if the stat sheet wasn’t huge. 12/4/0/1/0 on 5-9 FG (1-1 3PTM 1-1 FT). Any future Pierce DNPs, of which I expect several, I won’t hesitate to stream Otto von Bismark.
Kevin Seraphin – He’s so underrated. 7/6/1/0/0 in 15 minutes shooting only 2-6, but played big and the Wiz announcers share my love. They were saying he’s maybe the most exciting player to watch on the whole Wiz roster. He’s gonna be good if given a starting role at some point in his career.
Streamers/Cheap Daily League Picks:
Anthony Tolliver (2% owned) – Ewwwww, I feel dirty! A ThrAGNOF so bottom end last year he was barely ownable in the REL, Tolliver is actually carving out an interesting ThrAGNOF role off the Pistons bench. Treys in 8 straight, multi-treys in 5 of 7, usually hits his FT, and is at 27+ minutes in 3 of the past 4. And the biggie – against the awful Sixers tonight. Junk time booty call!
Zach LaVine (4% owned) – The news he’s in the dunk contest will fuel him! I keed of course, but Mo Williams is questionable and I kinda doubt plays, and Evan Turner is also out meaning a battle of raw rookie PGs against Marcus Smart. Smart is a better ROS guy to own, but LaVine is out there in a lot more leagues and I could see having a nice one tonight.
Thanks for stopping by everyone in Razzball Nation, and we’ll catch you on Thursday!