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Follow the white Babbitt!  If you had told me Luke Babbitt would be a critical add over the fantasy finals weekend, I would’ve beaten you to death with a sack full of lucky rabbit’s feet.   Would that be a …lucky way to die?

No, it’s not an April Fool’s joke that Babbitt went 22/10/3/2/1 last night.  No, it’s a joke he took a team-high (and an absurdly-high!) 25 shots.  And no, it’s not a joke that the Pelicans won a game led by Luke Mother F Babbitt!  That’s right, a guy with a last night that sounds like how Grey incorrectly pronounces “BABIP” on the Razzball Baseball Podcast is all the sudden a must-own wing over the final 3 H2H days.  Such a Velveteen Babbitt!  “He said it was because I know you like rabbits, and I know you like cheese…”  The Pelicans have no reason not to throw (double negative police!) their scrubbiest of scrubs into the starting 5 and see what wet noodles stick on the wall, so I fully expect him to be a starter for you in most 12-team leagues or deeper on the final Sunday @BKN.  Throw him in your Babbitt Stew!  OK, enough rabbit puns, as Monty Python would say – “get on with it!”  Oh yeah, I shoulda used a Holy Grail reference.  TOO LATE NOW!  Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy basketball action:

Toney Douglas Also got down and dirty with Babbitt, going 20/3/10.  He’s a vet and I’ve always liked his game, so this is less surprising than 25 EFFING SHOTS FOR BABBITT!  Just felt that needed one more all caps expletive.  With Jrue Holiday out for the season and Tim Frazier playing some decent combo G minutes in tandem rather than a minutes blocker (17/5/8 for Frazier in a nice line as well), Extra E Toney could be usable.

Alexis Ajinca – Benched so the Pels could play smaller, but still was fine for 8/8/0/2/1.  They’ll need more actual big man minutes against BKN if you’re thinking of using him Sunday.

Darrell Arthur – 10-15 shooting for a 24/9/1/0/1 line in only 22 minutes off the bench.  When Malone was asked why Arthur didn’t play more, he responded that aardvarks don’t have much stamina.

LeBron James Moved up to 12th in scoring.  Reporters asked how it felt to score so well.  Ironically, D’Angelo Russell asked the same question to Nick Young.

Shane Larkin – You’re welcome, America!  Our favorite streamer of the week keeps improving game-by-game, going 13/5/8/2/0 last night with a couple of treys on 4-7 shooting.  Already at 30/12/19/7/0 and has two games left!

Chicago Bulls – Gutty performance last night to hang on and beat the Rockets to remain 1 game out of the playoffs.  Derrick Rose is the big story, as the shock that he made it this long into the season (mostly) healthy turned into awwwwww.  Either re-hit his elbow or it wasn’t healthy enough for him to have any effectiveness.  That, or he was frustrated by that Pbev D!  Pau Gasol was meh, Jimmy Butler was awesome given he’s not 100% (21/8/6/2/1) and Nikola Mirotic got hot again off the bench hitting 5 treys for 28 points.  If you saw Bobby Portis was starting and did a last second stream, you were sorely disappointed!

Patrick Beverley Speaking of Pbev, 22/5/7 on a crazy efficient 9-13 shooting with 3 treys and nary a TO.  Pretty sad Houston lost this game…

Michael Beasley – China’s MVP is an MVP of 6th man NBA minutes for mediocre teams, that’s for sure!  20/11/2/0/0 on 7-18 shooting, but with only Sunday left on the schedule, you’re prob not too excited to go and nab him.  Lord…  I’d rather have Babbitt…

Nikola Vucevic He’s alive.  HE’S ALIVE!  Nikola Frankenstein for 24/6/1/0/1 on 12-15 shooting in 25 strong minutes off the bench.  If you’re in a non-IL league, he mighta been dropped by now, worth being sure he’s owned for Orlando’s final two games.

Myles Turner We’ve been worried/seeing him hit the rookie wall, and hell, the whole Pacers team hit a wall last night.  Paul George was solid though; but only 8/8/2/0/1 for Turner as he’s fading down the stretch.  It’s all good boi, makes him easier for me to draft next year!

Austin Rivers 32 Pts last night.  APRIL FOOLS!  Hah, I bet you thought that was April fools…  32/4/5/2/0 on 12-19 shooting including, wait for it, 7 treys.  Russell Westbrook apparently didn’t care about defense.

Jamal Crawford – Also put up 32 Pts as the Clip rested everyone.  Sounds like the original band is getting back together though, with even founding member Blake Griffin coming back after a stint in rehab after punching a roadie.

Cole Aldrich – I was hoping for a little more out of Cole, going 6/10/2/3/0 in 30 minutes.  He had blocks in 8 straight previous to last night – including multi-blocks in 7 of those – in less than 15 minutes per game.  Maybe he’s just good at blocking backups…  He should get a flat top fade haircut, it’s worked for Norris!

Serge Ibaka 16/9/3 with no blocks.  Nike really shouldn’t have had him promote their new line of lead shoes this year…

Al-Farouq Aminu Portland’s best scorer!  OBVIOUSLY!  28/9/1/1/3 with 6 treys.  Yet another line that looks April Foolsian.  Whatever, I streamed him in a league!  But my final RCL teams are getting slaughtered…  Save me, Al-Farouq, save me!  After slamming his game all off-season and through the year, now I’m relying on him.  It’s like a great story from my earlier years – in high school, this tool used to always make fun of this girl because on some school trip they went to a pool and she had…  superfluous body hair.  Then in college, one morning after a party he wakes up next to her, not remembering the night before.  Apparently they hit it off madly drunk realizing they went to the same college without knowing it.  Yeah, they dated for years.  Funny how things change.  Moral of the story is, “I’ll wax your whole body, Al-Farouq, I’ll do anything!”

Moe Harkless Been a scrubby, wing stream, but was still usable in only 22 minutes last night for 9/10/1/1/1.  It’s not quite Harkfull, but it’s more than Harkless…

Jae Crowder The Boston Clam Crowdah is piping hot today!  13/10/2/2/0 playing an unreal 35 minutes after being in a walking boot only a few days ago.  I was surprised he played, and he said he wants to play tonight even though they may sit him.  Everyone knows you can’t refrigerate chowdah!  Let him play!

Isaiah Thomas – Scored 20 points in every game in March.  No, not 19 Nick Young.

 

Good luck to everyone in your H2H finals!  Be on the lookout later this afternoon for our 2015-16 NBA Razzies polls, and we’ll still have the Pods and some daily notes covering the last 10 days of the season next weekend.  Have a good weekend, Razzball Nation!