The Abode

June 4, 2017 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 10 Comments

Welcome back to The Abode. If you missed the genesis, click here.

After a blowout-infested playoffs, the hype leading up to Warriors/Cavs III in the NBA Finals almost reached Mayweather/Pacquiao levels. Almost. Nothing will surpass the chicanery of Mayweather/Pac, though. The Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey would’ve been most impressed. Anyways, storylines and narratives were tossed around and many thought (perhaps wished?) that a heated, epic Finals would be showcased.

Game 1. Warriors 113. Cavs 91. The Cavs had 20 turnovers and the Warriors made 15 more field goals on 20 more attempts.

The Warriors Voltron’d up, while the Cavs were a bunch of scurrying ants trying to escape the ray of death from the magnifying glass of a nine-year old.

The Cavs did not panic, though, and Game 2 was an epic battle for two and a half quarters.

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Rankings, Compounded! Top 50 For 2016-17 Fantasy Basketball

August 22, 2016 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 68 Comments

by: JB Gilpin

Ahhh, the early mid-rounds. This is where you can really start zagging when owners want you to zig, or zig when they wanna zag, or just be a total Zags homer and draft Adam Morrison for the hell of it! Stupid Jordan picks…

So here we start vaulting into some of the bolder calls, where hopefully you don’t say “stupid JB picks”… I finally start going an island with a few calls, particularly some saucy PF-types. Choo choo! “Know what I’m SAYIN’!!!” Uh oh, I am starting to go delirious with the rankings already… I feel like Russell Crowe in that forest outhouse with magazine clippings everywhere. “What did Oladipo say in Slam Magazine about playing with Westbrook?!” Enough foreplay! You can check out the Top-10 and Top-25 though some clickage right there, and here’s the Top 50 for the 2016-17 Fantasy Basketball Season:

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The Milwaukee Bucks Salivate Vs. Salt Lick City

March 5, 2013 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 17 Comments

by: JB Gilpin

Why do deer like salt licks? It’s one of the longest pondered mysteries in the world. Ok, that’s not true at all after I asked Jeeves. According to Wikipedia (I know Mrs. Hanson, I can’t use it as a source but this isn’t a research paper, bitch) “A mineral [salt] lick is natural mineral deposit where animals in nutrient-poor ecosystems can obtain essential mineral nutrients.” Parallels! Those poor Milwaukee Bucks were having such nutrient-poor fantasy lines and highlights of late and just needed some salt to lick. Easy, “that’s what she said” guy (you know if you are). The Bucks had three plays in the Sportscenter top 10! Fantasy wise, Monta Ellis hadn’t scored 30 in 2013. Brandon Jennings hadn’t scored more than 11 in his last four games. J.J. Redick hadn’t scored more than 16 or hit more than 2 threes in a game for his new squad. And Larry Sanders hadn’t… Well he’s been playing awesome, and was awesome again last night. Let’s look at their lines and the rest of fantasy basketball’s noteworthy performances last night:

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NBA Trades Players, Razzball Basketball Trades Editors

February 21, 2013 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 11 Comments

by: JB Gilpin

Razzball Nation!!!!!!!!

If you have been around the Razzball block, you may have seen my stuff as a regular writer for Razzball Football (along with Co-Host of the Razzball Fantasy Football Podcast with @NickCapozzi) and an occasional contributor for Razzball Baseball. If not, then I say hello Basketball world! I will be taking over the reins as the editor-in-chief for Razzball Basketball (while continuing my contributions to our other fine sports sections) and look forward to making different jokes about the same players. Get ready for numerous Sam Cassell looks like E.T. references.

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Redirk Of The King

December 24, 2012 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 32 Comments

by: ChrisV

On Saturday night, I was in a German shop which sold a variety of imports, from marzipan to steins to cuckoo clocks. As I was eyeballing the clocks on the wall, the shop keeper came up to me to chat. As my companion asked about maintenance of the clocks, he noted that like anything made […]

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No J From J.J. Is Okay Most Days

January 10, 2012 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 45 Comments

by: Adam

James Johnson scored only 5 pts, but grabbed 5 boards, blocked five shot, made 2-of-3 from the floor and sank a three. This is why he’s valuable. Skip the scoring. It’s not there. Won’t happen. Ignore it. Grab him anyway. Of all the secondary players that are still mostly available in fantasy leagues (>25 percent […]

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Brand Recognition

February 7, 2011 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes | 11 Comments

by: Adam

Elton Brand mollywhopped the Knicks with a 28/5 line and perpetuated my prediction that Brand would have his best season since 2006. And he is. And I’m awesome. And Brand is awesome. And every fantasy team that was able to snap him up in the middle or late rounds of their drafts are all the […]

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The Darling Dud Of May

September 10, 2010 | Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes |

by: Adam

The big boned Sean May broke his foot and will be out ’til after training camp. May’s feet were tired of all the stress and strain and put their two weeks notice in. After three consecutive days of coming into work late, filthy and constantly harassing the secretaries, the rest of Sean May asked his […]

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