Wrong calls, right calls, as long as I’m always closing! I have that same Baldwin-demeanor when I prep my DraftKings line-up. I rally my players with a speech like that! The RAZZBALL ONLY CONTEST is back tonight(!); get your entries in now, and the DraftKings only post will be up later in the day. I don’t ask from much from you loyal readers in Razzball Nation, but let’s get this contest filled out this week! Click that link there, it’s only $10, and they take no profit, just Razzball v. Razzball, mano y mano.
It was a light night for news with only the two games, so I figured it was a good day for patting my back! The Ramon Sessions signing clouded an otherwise already dreamy outlook, but I didn’t let it deter me from my Darren Collison love! Brought in for serious skrilla, the Kings just happened to land a quality guy in Sessions for peanuts, and even though it hasn’t worked out, they don’t have much tied into him. With two fantastic scorers in Rudy Gay and DeMarcus Cousins, I knew passing on Colly would be folly, and had him green light go! Obviously I didn’t think he’d be this good, but the joints keep rollin’ with dimebag after dimebag! 17/6/12/1/1 last night, second game in a row with 10+ dimes, and 23:1 AST:TO in that span. We all knew he could slash, but with the dimes this high and the low TO, he’s turning into a premiere PG. After last night and owning Kirk Hinrich, Collison was like, “That’s who Tom Thibodeau praises for defense?! Must be why he praises Krispy Kreme burgers – for the health benefits!” Here’s what else went down last night in NBA hoops:
Chris Paul – May not be the flashiest first-round guy like our boyfriend the Brow, but man is it consistent! 26/2/12/1/0 in amazing efficiency for 8-13 (3-5 3PTM 7-8 FT) and only one TO. Saint Paul.
Jamal Crawford – Gimme one more pinch, almost at the dimebag! 5/3/9 aned facilitating like the Paul-injury days of yesteryear. The 5 points were by far a season low (only second time in single digits), but sick to see when the shot ain’t droppin’, the dimes be… well droppin’. If Rick Ross can rhyme Atlantic to Atlantic then I guess we can rhyme identical words!
DeAndre Jordan – Where’ my Vitamin B?! According to Wikipedia, “B vitamins are a class of water-soluble vitamins that play important roles in cell metabolism and blocking the shizz outta labradoole layups.” True story! But had the scurvy (wait, isn’t that no C?) last night for 12/11/1/0/0 and still the awful 0-2 FT. Made all 6 shots though! I wonder if it counts if you block a teammate’s pass into the basket… “That’s called an alley-oop, you ponce!”
Blake Griffin – Well, the steals come in bunches! Exactly the scenario we talked about on the Pod yesterday, and got 3 swipes last night. I had the tootsie roll owl potty train me. “How many swipes does it take for a clean tooshie?” “One, two, THREEEEEE!” 26/7/4/3/0 making 12-18, but still can’t figure out the charity stripe, making 1-3. Maybe if he pictures the rim as the face of that dude he assaulted in a nightclub when shooting FT, he would connect on a few more…
Luol Deng – Went from doubtful to a surprise start, but probably shouldn’t have played since he had a 13/5/0/0/0 nothingball line. Missed all his 3s taking 4 attempts. Lazy like a tapir! Unlike…
Shabazz Napier – Look at that transition! Tough to rhyme anything less obscure than tapir to Napier… 17/5/3/1/0 hitting a couple treys and getting a big 32 minutes of run. Norris Cole dislocated a finger and played just under 10 minutes without returning. I gotta say, for a “non-serious” injury, I really hope not to dislocate anything in my lifetime… Some extra G minutes are being flung around willy-nilly with Dwyane Wade still out and Cole should miss very little, if any time. Good to see a little upside though from Bazzy, and the TO (9 the previous 2) go down to only two last night.
Chris Bosh – Really the only other offense for the Heat. 9-17 FG, 28/7/1/0/0. The points are great, and you love the 9-9 FT, but it’s still been a little emptier than we hoped since the early start. Was a solid 1-2 from deep though! 2 for his last 4 after a 2-16 cold spell the 5 games before. P.S. – the curse of the 28 or 29 point game now haunts me! Damn you Slim!
Aaron Brooks – While I love making fun of Hinrich, he did have to leave with a chest contusion but X-rays were negative. No broken titties! With Derrick Rose looking like he’s out until next week, Brooks might play a full 48 at point! More below.
Taj Gibson – It’s not the flashiest, but 12/8/1/1/1 will get it done! Pau Gasol is likely out again tonight (a little speculatory there), so run the Taj Mahal out there as fast as your bowels after eating Indian food!
Jimmy Butler – Mr. Buckets, you’re so dreamy! 23/3/1/2/0 shooting 11-18. Makes some incredible plays out there. Rose continues to be as out of touch as Melrose Place, so we get another few games of this.
DeMarcus Cousins – If the TO could ever go down, he’d be a mini-Brow! But he’s still a first-round Brow, they’re just more groomed and less swatty/blocky. 22/14/4/1/1, with one of those dimes a sick full court pass over three Bulls defenders. Grow some horns, Noah!
Derrick Williams – Oh god, if Derrick Williams still a thing?! 22 minutes out of absolutely friggin’ nowhere (double-digit minutes only twice this year, and barely over 10 minutes TOTAL since Nov. 3), and it’s not like he did much anyway! 4-9 FG (2-4 FT) for 10/2/2/0/0. It’s not like there were any injuries he had to emergency fill in for… The game before he got 3 fouls before playing a full minute! Moving on…
Rudy Gay – Was able to play through his sore Achilles, and played like a boss! 20/7/3 on 7-11 FG and 5-5 FT making his only trey. Couldn’t miss! Well, not as literally as…
Omri Casspi – …who shot 5-5 FG and 4-4 FT in a fairly empty-scoring 14/1/0/1/0 line. Give Casspi some of those god-awful D-Will (of the lesser) minutes!
Ramon Sessions – 13 minutes, hit both shots but 2 TO to 2 dimes. Hey, at least seems to have re-taken the backup minutes from Ray McCallum. Like I said earlier this week, I want no SAC G except Colly!
Streamers/Cheap DraftKings Plays:
Since RCLs are “Daily-Tomorrow”, streamers listed the morning don’t help all owners, but will help you crush with some deep, cheap DraftKings picks! Like for the contest tonight, which we need to fill up!
J.J. Barea (3% owned) – He was a former DraftKings play for me before I moved to Brooks, but I might reconsider this stream in deepers if Devin Harris suits up. Injured McGoo has a sore ankle, and in a home game with the horrible Lakers (but they have won their last two!) coming to Big D, I expect a lot of burn for the second unit. Even if Harris plays, when the Mavs are up 30 in the third quarter he might not do much. Barea should give you a trey or two and a few dimes.
Aaron Brooks (15% owned) – As mentioned above, Hinrich and Rose both seem out tonight. Should get some huge run out there in a fast paced game against the Blazers, with Damian Lillard’s D at times questionable.
That’s going to wrap it up for this week, be sure and stream out your spots for a few extra wins in Week 4, and we’ll see ya Monday!