LOGIN

Anyone watch the Mavs host the Celtics last night?  Game be scrappy!  Rajon Rondo tackled Monta Ellis towards the end trying to restrain him for a hard foul, and I got confused if I was watching hoops or that MNF tragedy!  Ellis held his knee for a bit there, so let’s hope he’s OK…

But the big story in that one was Jeff Green‘s absurdity.  Well, it actually mimicked the absurdity of this game.  Down 30 in the second quarter, the Celtics somehow came back – in Dallas – to make it a nailbiter to the finish.  The Mavs took Jeff Green as seriously as fantasy owners this year, and he had one of his three monster games he’ll have this season.  35/7/2/1/2 shooting 14-28 including 5-12 from downtown.  If there was ever a sell high game, this would be it.  You need any data to back it up?  How about after his last big game – 39/6 with four treys against the Pelicans on March 16th, 2014?  The subsequent 8 games immediately afterwards – 11.8/3.6/2.3 shooting 34% from the field.  Green is Brandon Jennings in a SF/PF body.  They couldn’t even do a Freaky Friday remake with these two, they’d wake up and look at their new bodies in the mirror and go, “meh, at least I can still get hot one game outta ten shooting the ball…”

Green’s first two games were the expected blah, and he just doesn’t do anything but score and trey… Glorified ThrAGNOF!  Is Chris Copeland really that much worse than Jeff Green right now?  Maybe Citizen Copeland doesn’t have this kind of big game upside, but it’s why we preach to stream your threeballers.  Stream your polyorchids!  Learn something new every day here at Razzball… Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:

Avery Bradley – Two Celtics players scored 30 points in the same game for the first time since Bird and McHale in 1985.  Don’t fact check that, just trust me!  32/8/1/3/0 shooting a sizzling 13-22 (4-6 3PTM 2-3 FT).  Now that’s efficiency, Green!  His offensive output continues to improve, but I dunno what you can really do about it, I wouldn’t feel great doing anything more than stream Bradley in a 12er.

Marcus Smart I saw the three he ACTUALLY MADE!  It’s like seeing a Dodo bird.  3-7 from the field shooting 1-5 from downtown.  Using my degree in advanced mathematics from MIT, I can deduce he went 2-2 when shooting inside the arc.  The offensive plan for Smart is just downright laughable.  2-14 from 3 this year, 4-7 closer to the basket.  Get Wild Thing some glasses!  Did play by far the most bench minutes, as the Celtics went small with Rondo, Bradley, Smart to press.  7/6/3/1/1 is a solid game, and Rondo should be able to find him on some backcuts, not camping for threes!

Evan Turner – 17 minutes of 4/4/2/0/0 with 2 TO and this is why we told you not to draft Evan Turner.

Jameer Nelson – It’s early, but this is looking like one of my worst calls of the year.  Absolutely brutal in this game, shooting 2-7 in 23 minutes for 6/2/2/0/0 and FIVE TURNOVERS!  Yes Jameer, you get an all caps because you should be playing like Jose Calderon did last year!  Have your Mavs playmakers doing everything and squat your worthless butt behind the arc for threes!  He did hit two 3-pointers constituting all his points this game, but he’s droppable for me now even in 14ers.  Devin Harris outplayed him both in minutes and effectiveness again last night, and the ghosts of J.J. Barea and Raymond Felton haunt all sort of fantasy value from this backcourt.

Trevor Ariza – Preach it to me, T-Rev!  24/6/7/2/0 with a crazy efficient day shooting 8-13 (6-9 3PTM 2-2 FT).  He’s become such an underrated amazing player.  I have his name surrounded by a heart on my trapper keeper.  In 3 of the first 4 Rockets games, he’s racked up 4 or more treys, 2 steals, while shooting well over 50% on the season.  Doesn’t need to force it with the Beard running game.

Dwight Howard – Rainbow alert!  We have our fun bashing how much he hurts you, but the counting stats of 11/14/3/3/4 was pretty nice last night.  Butttttttt, against the Sixers.  And even so, had 5 TO and shot 1-4 FT.  Superdamn.

Isaiah Canaan – A pretty solid 30 minutes for 13/2/6/2/0 shooting 5-11 knocking down three long balls.  Had some foul trouble or else might’ve played a little more, so it’s good to see Canaan cancan handle the starting PG role if he needs to.  Patrick Beverley probably would’ve played last night if it wasn’t against the horrific Sixers, so expect your PBev back tonight against the Heat.

Henry Sims – When you’re benched and play only 13 minutes for the Sixers, it’s about the worst indictment an NBA starter could get.

Brandon Davies – Started at the 4 with Nerlens Noel manning the 5.  Brett Brown tinkering with the line-up is astoundingly asinine.  Like, c’mon dude, it’s not gonna help you win games!  Noel was pretty solid in a light rebounding night, going 10/1/5/6/1.  Those sweet, sweet steals!  So much saucier outta position.

Tony Wroten – 20/5/4/5/0, with a pretty efficient day given his struggles in %s for 7-16 FG (2-3 3PTM 4-6 FT).  When Tony Wroten is your team’s most important player, it’s time to start seeing if Whoopi Goldberg will coach this team.  “Ivan take charge!”

K.J. McDaniels – Got ya a block, but 14/3/1/0/1 isn’t moving my needle like the blonde Milf on Top Chef this season.  Whew-ee!  KJ hit three treys, but 1-4 FT (4-10 on the year now), and other than a 3 block game, has only 2 in the other three Sixers tankfests.  I’d be chasing blocks elsewhere.  St. Elsewhere.

Serge Ibaka – Is pretty clearly the best Thunder player right now, hitting 7-11 (1-2 treys) for 15/9/1/1/2.  Did his work in 29 minutes, as the Thunder were downright embarrassed by the Nets.  Serge better be as cautious with his health as Frank Drebin is with sex.

Reggie Jackson – A little sloppy, but was unleashed for 42 minutes.  23/4/5/0/1 with two treys but 7 TO.  Mini-Westbrook!  Has some ridiculous upside for the next month.

Andre Roberson – Getting ridiculous for OKC.  Suffered a foot sprain, and will miss tonight’s game, at the least.  The Thunder were down to 7 men after Roberson went down.  I was all ready to de-robe my fantasy teams to add Roberson!  Looks like Sebastian Telfair is the biggest beneficiary, since the Thunder have no healthy wings.  16/5/6/0/0 with three treys in 35 minutes last night, as OKC is going to have to play small ball.  Worth a stream tonight if you have a roster spot to tinker with, like I do in one of my RCLs.

Brook Lopez – Oh you don’t say so, it’s the return of BroLo!  Looked pretty good to me in the bits of this game I watched; a little spryer than I would imagine a clownfooted 7-footer.  18/6/0/1/2 in 24 minutes, and might’ve played more but had two quick fouls and was subbed out, then it became a blowout early.  A few more nice games, and hopefully you can sell high, but you’re playing with fire with Mr. Glass Feet.

Mason Plumlee It’s a little tough, but I’m trying to hold in 12ers and deeper where I can.  Even in 15:30 backup minutes, went 10/8.  No blocks, but you’ll take it.  And Brittle McGoo BroLo is still a flight risk to have this happen.

Tyreke Evans – On pace to finally be as good as his rookie year.  21/7/4/1/0 with two treys.  While his FG% is at a career-worst pace (very small sample), he’s on pace to have his first season where he helps you in 3PTM as well, knocking down 5 through 3 games.  Reke from deep!

Ryan Anderson – Mister Anderson… “My name is mas frio!”  2-14 FG in a labradoodle fest that would make Best in Show proud.

Mike Conley – Rainbow line!  11/3/5/2/2 but re-hurt his bummy ankle.  Really this sort of ankle maintenance is no different than Ty Lawson, and everyone thinks Lawson is going to spontaneously combust at some point.  NBA JAM comes to life!

Darren Collison – Hack a Colly!  11-13 FT last night for a shimmering 21/4/6/1/0 line with only 1 TO.  Looking like the value I had hoped!

Ramon Sessions – Hack a Ramon!  10-10 FT.  Apparently it was hack a Kings PG night…  First good game with SAC for 13/2/3, but still had 3 TO and shot 1-6 in 21 minutes.  Your 3-1 Kings rocking it at the FT line!  40-47 last night.  How crazy would it be if DeMarcus Cousins won the MVP and the Kings won 60 games?  I’d say, Sarah Palin crazy, but some people think she’s not!

Ty Lawson – At least he’s the human dispensary!  Besides the 12 dimes last night, really didn’t do much.  Not that you need much else when you’ve got a dimebag!

Chris Paul – CP3dub!  Triple doubled against the Jazz and nearly rainbowed for 13/10/13/3/1.  He good, Jazz bad!

Blake Griffin – I’ve said his whole career it is poppycock that Blake can’t block more shots given dem hops.  31/9/4/0/2 last night, after only one swat through the first three.  Perturbs me to the same boiling point as Marcus Smart’s threes!  I feel like I’m taking crazy pills, it’s one look!

Jamal Crawford – 19 shots off the bench while the human backne J.J. Redick finally stopped launching horrible shots going 2-6.  Redick was 8-33 coming into this game (24%), so Crawford back for now (and scoring his 15,000th point last night) makes Redick a tough guy to hold.  I know it’s early, but I thought J.J. would be better.

Spencer Hawes – DeAndre Jordan stayed out of foul trouble for the most part, and played 38 minutes keeping the Handlebars on the bench.  15 minutes of 0/2/1/0/1 for Hawes.  I’m giving up.

Derrick Favors – Yeesh.  After a humungo game, 6/3/1/0/0 in a 27 minute disappearing act.  Definitely NOT giving up.  Another slow one or two, and here come the buy lows.

Trevor Booker – Continuing to be useful and getting big minutes.  27 last night for 12/5/2/1/0 shooting 5-9 with 2 more unexpected treys.  Has five threes now this year, after hitting one, count ONE, through his previous four-year career.  Gotta buy this is a new part of his game… Won’t block shots for a big, but he’s out there virtually everywhere (7% owned in Yahoo).  Rather Booker over Hawes nowadays.

Guess the Kobe Stat Line – Gotta say, after the 3 or 4 last year and few to start this season, it’s good to finally be off a win!  Let’s make it two for two baby!  Suns coming to the Staples Center – I think we see a little fireworks.  Gimme 29/6/7.  Shoot your guesses below, good luck tonight!

 

I hope everyone didn’t have a case of the Mondays on their squads last night!  “I believe you’d get your ass kicked sayin’ something like that, man.”  So um, er, I mean, I hope your teams started hot this week!