Fantasy Basketball: The SONs with a Performance Befitting a King

LeBron James was born in Akron, Ohio, played high school ball for St. Vincent-St. Mary High School, which is located in Akron, Ohio, and was drafted by the Cleveland Cavaliers, whose stadium is a 50 minute drive from Akron, Ohio. He is the SON that morphed into the King, but no reign endures forever and every SON eventually leaves the nest (two times now for LBJ). When LeBron left back in 2010, the Cavaliers went from winning 61 games and losing in the Eastern Conference Semis to losing 63 games. He did leave behind a couple of SONs, though: Daniel GibSON, J.J. HickSON, and Antawn JamiSON. Barf. Last year, the Cavaliers won 50 games and lost in the NBA Finals. With LeBron moving to Hollywood, the Cavaliers were 1-11 entering last night’s game. Vomit. This time, though, LeBron left behind a different group of SONs (Tristan ThompSON, Jordan ClarkSON, and Andrew HarriSON), who produced a performance befitting a king last night for a 113-89 victory over the Charlotte Hornets.

Tristan ThompSON

TT has been en fuego lately, as he’s produced a double-dub in four straight games, has averaged 32 minutes over that span, has hoisted up 11 shots per game, and has been a top 100 player for fantasy! What world are we living in? If you need blocks and boards, this is one reality show you want to subscribe to. Beep. Boop. Bop. The Stocktonator must love reality tv because it liked Thompson last night.

Jordan ClarkSON

Clarkson is a professional hucker and chucker, as he’s jacked up 13.5 shots in 23.8 minutes on the season. Due to all the recent injuries, Clarkson has been receiving over 28 minutes per game (three games) and has been contributing in boards and assists. Seriously, we are living in a world where Tristan Thompson is a top 100 player for fantasy and Jordan Clarkson is contributing in other categories besides points.

Andrew HarriSON

Played 13 minutes. That’s when you know things are going good. Andrew is the forgotten SON because he sucks, but he’s family, so we have to show him some love.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Larry Nance Jr.

Got another start at power forward and played 35 minutes. Too bad your leage doesn’t have a dunks category.

Collin Sexton

Got the start and played 33 minutes. He’s a rookie, so there will be mistakes, but the athleticism and potential are evident. I don’t see why the Cavs would go back to George Hill when he returns from injury.

David Nwaba

I love Nwaba, as he’s a local boy, but that’s not the only reason. I love his game. He hustles, plays D, and finishes strong at the rim. Nwaba is not the most efficient shooter, so last night’s game was an outlier, but he has improved in that area. If he gets minutes, he can stuff the stat sheet.

Rodney Hood

Got off to a scorching start, but like Kaeyser Soze….poof….disappeared. The Rodney Hood story.

Kemba Walker

Another victim of the Cleveland night life. Wait? What?

Jeremy Lamb

Lamb was a baaaaaaaaaaaaad man last night. Usually, he’s just bad. Anyways, two of his biggest games have come against the Cavs this season. Use that information however you want. I’m just the messenger.

Miles Bridges

Played 16 minutes. A low usage player, Bridges is over troubled water, as he has too much jump and not enough shot in the jumpshot.

PJ Tucker

Tucker has become the guy that I’d die for this season. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ What a world. Maybe because I like PB&J sandwiches? or Smuckers jelly? I’m hungry. Anyways, he has a comically low usage rate of 9, yet he’s the 66th player according to BM. Tucker plays 36 minutes per game and is averaging 8.5 points, 2.3 threeecolas, 5.6 boards, 1.2 dimes, 1.4 steals, 0.5 blocks, and 0.8 turnovers.

James Ennis III

Played 36 minutes. Look what happens when Carmelo Anthony is let go. A season-high from Ennis! A text book example of addition by subtraction.

Clint Capela

C&C making all his owners dance now.

Chris Paul

The assists are down (7.5) and the field goal percentage is bad (41%), but the steals are back (2.5)…for now. The Rockets could be rounding into form, so I’d expect both the assist number and shooting efficiency to improve. It’s all about health with Paul, though.

James Harden

I was told that there would be triple-dubs. As mentioned above, the Rockets could be settling in so we should all be getting Harden excited soon.

Eric Gordon

Played 33 minutes. The ultimate 3 & without the D player.

Juan Hernangomez

Got another start and played 39 minutes. Juancho can shoot, but he’s just not getting enough opportunites to make us scream, “JUANCHO!!!!”

Jamal Murray

Gary Harris

Jinx.

Monte Morris

Played 31 minutes. A player that has been impressing the coaching staff and many in the media, Morris has averaged 27 minutes per game over the past four games. He can score, provide assists, steals, and threeecolas. The most impressive aspect of his game, though, is the 56 assists to 7 turnovers.

Jonas Jerebko

Got the start and played 25 minutes in place of Draymond Green. JJ was draining J’s and doing work on the glass. Someone to keep in mind for future suspensions, rest, or injuries.

Kevin Durant

He’s good. Blah. Blah. Blah. From the mouth of Draymond Green, “KD’s a [email protected]#!h. [email protected]#$!h. [email protected]#$!h.

Quinn Cook

Another start for the injured Steph Curry. When Curry returns, there will be no Cook in the kitchen.

Klay Thompson

Watching the game, it looked like he was struggling with his shot. Look at the stat box after the game and…..¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Ok then.

Andre Iguodala

Played 26 minutes after playing 33 minutes the night before. If you need….just kidding.

Omari Spellman

Only played 14 minutes. He had played 28, 27, and 28 minutes the prior three games, with two double-dubs. Golden State said, “No Dubs for you.”

Alex Len

Played 32 minutes. Should cede minutes when Dewayne Dedmon and John Collins return. Until then, enjoy the Alex Len experience. Translation: buy lots of Tums.

Trae Young

Still a Young pup. It’s nice to see him contribute in the other categories. Have patience grasshoppers.

DeAndre Bembry

Only played 17 minutes, but jumped off the screen in that limited time. Bembry is very athletic, hustles, and has a decent shot. Minutes will be tough to come by, but I wouldn’t be surprised if spots open up sooner rather than later.

Vince Carter

Played 17 minutes. We are not worthy.

Taurean Prince

Played a team-high 39 minutes. We began the post with the King. It’s only fitting that this post ends with a performance by a Prince befitting a king.