The H2H season is over! Hopefully you triumphed over your leagues with Ws in the final week, and kept from being rocked by the DNP-obsessed NBA. NBA coaches and GMs are just trolling us fantasy players! Ya know what Dwane Casey? You’re flat out dumb, your mom is ugly, and you’re a n00b coach!
Erstwhile all these benchings, we got a big return yesterday afternoon with Blake Griffin rejoining the Clip. On top of Doc saying he was mad out of shape, we also got news his quad is still bothering him and he’ll be playing through the pain. Oh, wahhhhhhhh Blake! What about the pain of getting slugged in the face by one of the most jacked NBA players in the league!? Or as you see it, sorry his skull caused your hand such pain! Hopefully you were only stashing Blake in IL leagues, as he only put up 6/5/4/0/0 with a TO in 22 minutes. He shot 2-7 from the field, and looked more gassed than Zoolander’s Balls Models friends… Did anyone even see the 2nd one? Looked awful… Anyway, Doc said he was going to be really careful with Blake, so if your league continues on until the bitter end, be prepared for continual low-minutes and Doc to hop in on the DNP obsession. Hopefully it’s just a fad, like Angry Birds or those skinny rubber wristbands… Oh wait! Here’s what else went down over the championship weekend in fantasy basketball:
Karl-Anthony Towns – Not making it easy to have him be a sneaky-good late-first rounder anymore! Everyone is gonna have him top-6! 11/21/9/1/3 last night, in a game where the Wolves only scored 78. Little big Towns!
Elton Brand – Our fantasy savior! Why would ANYONE want to come back and be a salty vet on a punt team for a few games… He needed that taste of NBA minutes again! 13/11/1/1/1 then 2/10/4 over the weekend, so deep leaguers have to actually take this serious. WHY SO SERIOUS!?
Jerami Grant – Continues to have one of the most underrated 2nd halves I can remember… 17/2/1/2/2 in a near rainbow then 20/9/3/0/1 over Friday and Saturday. And really his whole season has been pretty good, minus an atrocious FG% for a blocker…
JJ Barea – I think I can, I think I can! 29/3/3 and 21/3/6 over the weekend, and on an absurd tear over the past couple weeks. I still don’t quite trust short people, I think they’re hiding something! i.e fantasy production like this!
Marcus Morris – Had a huge outburst vs. Barea and co. Friday night, going 31/12/4/1/2 with 0 TO. Someone before the game told him that Mark Cuban helped convince the Suns to trade away Kieff. Followed it up with a decent enough 16/4/2/1/1 line Saturday night, capping off a pretty solid wire-to-wire season.
Thomas Robinson – The Nets are shutting down Thaddeus Young and Brook Lopez, giving T-Rob and his perpetually under-performing skillset a chance to shine the final 10 days. He’s had dubdubs in 4 straight, but with absolutely atrocious FT shooting. If that sounds like a fit to you, then you’re a match in heaven!
Jonas Valanciunas – After getting clowned for his declining blocks, took matters into his own hands! 11/14/0/3/7 against the banged up Grizz Friday night, following it up with 2 swats against the Spurs on Saturday. Wow, 10 Stl+Blk for the Luminescent Lithuanian! Gets his nickname back after that – he’s not even averaging 2 Stl+Blk a game!
Victor Oladipo – Speaking of D stats, RainbOladipo in full effect! 18/3/5/5/4 against the Bucks – couldn’t grab one more board for the double RainbOladipo?! Then 22/7/2/3/1 last night without a TO. Finishing strong, but we still won’t be able to rank him great because of that frumpy coach… Speaking of, have you voted for the 2015-16 Razzies yet??!?!
Giannis Antetokounmpo – Woooo, 7 foot PG, love it! 18/11/11/2/3 then 34/5/9/1/1 over the weekend, and he’s turned into a fantasy superstar. If anyone is ever in a fantasy rut, I’ll just yell at them “get him to the Greek!”
Trey Lyles – I love what Rotoworld said on Lyles – in the year of the rookie, Lyles has been really overlooked and has been great when given minutes. 18/5/1/1/1 and 13/3/1 over the weekend, with 2 treys in each. Could give you a nice finish.
Gerald Green – After putting up 30 Pts of ThrAGNOF on Friday, disappeared on Saturday. First thing to look at – who’d he play? That’s right, the mother f Kings on Friday, woooooo! Exploit dat matchup!
Seth Curry – Speaking of the Kings, baby-Curry scored 21 then 17 points over the weekend, hitting 6 combined treys. It’s gonna be pretty ThrAGNOFfy, but he should get the run!
C.J. Miles – I’d take Curry over another ThrAGNOF option like Miles, even though he exploited dat matchup Saturday against the Phillies with 25/2/0/3/1 and 5 treys. I might have the team name wrong, but can you blame me this time of year?!
Myles Turner – Coming off the bench, but still playing key minutes. That said, hasn’t had that “ummmpf” game down the stretch, which I would define as anything that was that good… 8/10/2/0/1 then 12/6/1/1/1. It’s fine! Just not… ummmmpf.
Jimmy Butler – Godzilla doesn’t like it when you call him hurt! Had an unreal tripdub rainbow on Saturday, going 28/17/12/3/2 and on a b2b yesterday went 25/5/8/1/1. With no Derrick Rose, Godzilla is the man! Buckets is gonna be so hard to rank in 16-17 with all these injuries…
Luke Babbitt – Speaking of hard to rank, let’s get Babbitt into the top-50 next year! Haha, I keed, but he has been a dynamite add to close out the season, going 21/1/4/0/1 with 3 treys in a game where I said he was must play on Sunday. Cha-ching!
Tim Frazier – Ker-fuffle! I wasn’t as big on Frazier, kinda like how I’m not big on Frasier. Sure it was a smidge before my time, but it just seemed like rich people have rich affluent problems. Yawn. Anyway, Todd Frazier is primed for a nice power season in US Cellular field and just needs to carry his production through the second half… DAMMIT! I mean, TIM FRAZIER went 19/2/13/3/0 and somehow managed to do that with no TO yesterday. Given it was against the Nets who are as thrown together a team as the Pels, but still a pretty dirty game. Add him if you need PG stats where you can!
Nicolas Batum – One situation might be where you lost Batum, who gave everyone a massive dud Sunday before leaving with a strained knee. The Hornets were getting murdered – so it may have just been cautious – but I’m still a little worried.
Alex Len – If you wanna talk Sunday duds, how about Len single-handedly losing people their finals matchups! 0-8 FG 3/6/0/0/0 with 2 TO. And I would be like, “well, OK, he played 15 minutes because he wasn’t playing well…” But that was in 35 minutes! Dear god, do something out there besides miss shots!
Damian Lillard – Speaking of missing shots… My segways are gold today! After obliterating your FG% in the finals week, finally had a good game. Scored 38 Pts last night, but STILL couldn’t shoot over 50%! You’ll take 13-27 though… Or else The Omen will make gorillas at the zoo very upset at you! Which reminds me, I had a weird dream about baboons last night, that could make their heads morph into human heads… Weird. But true…
Draymond Green – I haven’t been giving him the love in-and-out every article anymore, because his greatness is just ASSUMED! #OccupyTripleDoubles baby!
Kobe Bryant – In his sendoff fantasy game, 34/4/1/3/0 and no TO against the Celtics! However, it took him 28 shots (made 11) and the Lakers still lost to their East Coast rivals. Still, nice to see a vintage-ish Kobe line on the final Sunday. I’m all weepy inside to see him go… PSYCHE, JORDAN CLARKSON IS GONNA BALL NEXT YEAR!
Thanks to everyone who played in the RCLs (winner announced Wednesday), read Razzball all year, and congrats to all who won titles last night! I hope you had a great weekend Razzball Nation, and we’ll be here closing out the season for Roto and H2H leagues that play through the final 10 games.
