Author: Jay

Jay is a longtime Razzball everything who consumes an egregious amount of Makers Mark as a vehicle to gain wisdom and augment his natural glow. Living in the D.C. area, he also likes spending time visiting the local parks and feeding lettuce to any turtles he encounters, including Mitch McConnell.

Read some of Jay's 169 posts

Lakers’ War: Return of the LeBron

by: Jay

Much has been pontificated, written, said, even dreamed! about LeBron’s recent kerfluffle, kerfluffle being the *official* term, so I’ll leave that where it lays. It’s like how you’re never supposed to beat up a dead horse, mainly because I’m sure it smells and you shouldn’t be touching anything that’s been dead for a while. I’m sure that’s what that saying means. But man, is it just me, Captain Obvious, your friend, or do the Lakers kinda-sorta suck without LeBron James? With Thanksgiving Eve bringing a full slate of games and content, it was still too easy to focus on this Lakers vs. Pacers matchup that went to OT and saw LeBron play for 43 minutes, scoring 39 PTS on 13-29 shooting and 5-12 3PT with 5 REB, 6 AST, and 2 BLK. The performance and James leading the Lakers in the fourth quarter to force OT was what I call his usual Wednesday, but I guess he had to once again remind all the haters about his GOAT status, even playing center and being the best defender on the floor at the same time. Good Jokic if I ever saw one. With that pun already making me roll all of our eyes, let’s check out what else happened last night in the N-B-A…

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Thanksgiving Poole Party

by: Jay

Look, I would have just named this post “Poole Party” and be done with it, but hey, it’s nearing gobble-gobble (scientific terminology) time and I figure if I add the word “Thanksgiving” the SEO gods will smile upon us mere mortals and conversion rates will rain down from the sky. But enough about online marketing, we’re not here for that. I mean, *we* are, but you’re not, so let’s move from the turkey day (andanotherone.gif) part of the title to the “Poole Party” part, which is either a really fantastic pun or the ye olde English way of inviting you to my pool party. Which one could it be I ask? If you picked the Jordan Poole pun, you win! I mean, the prize is just you joining me after the jump for more Jordan Poole content, but some would say that the real destination is the friends we made along the way. Be my friend…

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Damn It Jim, I’m a Basketball Player, Not A Doctor

November 15, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball | 1 Comment

by: Jay

Look, if I have a chance to go Trek, imma go Trek. Famous last words from a nerd (I think the best jingles rhyme), but what else should I do with a player named Nah’Shon “Bones” Hyland that isn’t sexually explicit? Sharing the same naming conventions of Duncan Idaho or perhaps the more-widely known Hannah Montana, Bones Hyland has been making a name for himself lately, which seems redundant in this context. For a rookie that has set career-high for point in his last four games, one might wonder what his true ceiling is, and while he wasn’t considered in the highest tiers in this past draft class, surely that sentiment is changing and for good reason. So while he might not ever reach Doctor McCoy levels of stardom, one has to be happy with the fact that he actually might become an NBA star, which you know is probably more important since, well, yeah, spoiler alert, this is a basketball site.

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Call Me Mobley

November 8, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

Borrowing something from the cultural zeitgeist and then rebranding it into something new has a large set of unwritten rules, and most likely one of them is that dated references can show their age pretty easily. Seems easy enough to accept if you also accept the fact that there are unwritten rules for such things and I can just arbitrarily do what I want with them, but that’s just science folks, unquestionable in this day and age. Ahem. But I’d like to think there’s something deeper here at play. Call Me Maybe is a great anthem and bubblegum pop track, of course, we all know that. But that it alludes to the inconvenience that love at first sight brings to a girl greater depth and meaning to the forefront and ultimately addresses the current relationship you might have right now with Evan Mobley. Crazy, right? Yeah, probably, but that’s the content of this post and we’re doing it live. Not really live, but who doesn’t need another old reference?

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From Dame to Lame

November 1, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball | 3 Comments

by: Jay

While the title may seem a bit pointed and may give the allure of another easy hot take piece on what is an early season and a popular player struggling, I promise that while this post may still be that, the title itself is more about me being lazy and just picking something with an easy rhyming scheme. But hey, it works. FOR ME. But guess what’s not working? Everything for Dame, that’s for sure. And while you expect to feel at least a lil’ scared and haunted on Halloween, I’d say watching one of the worst performances of Damian Lillard’s career is a bit scarier than should be allowed. (So many Halloween references, so little time.) So what’s up with Dame and will he continue to stay lame? Linger and enjoy the rhyme a bit more before jumping in and finding out…

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Thunderstruck

October 28, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes |

by: Jay

I’m not the biggest AC/DC fan… which is probably an understatement. But of course, I have yet to meet anyone who doesn’t feel a smidgen of hype by the time “Thunder” is said seven straight times, and in a way, perhaps a metaphor for the actual Oklahoma City Thunder. I’ve never actually met a Thunder fan, have never seen one outside of Paycom, and I have a hard time finding a reason to retain any information of the team from year-to-year, yet at certain times, usually the playoffs, I find myself getting hyped by their ability to just grind. And while this was not actually one of those games (WHAT A TWIST), I do find it absolutely compelling when watching a team come down from 26 points to defeat a Lakers team that oddly has a few players which might have played for Oklahoma at some point and time? As I said, Thunder retention has been at an all-time low for me, but the fact remains, after four straight losses and allowing the Lakers 41 points in the first quarter, under 27 points from Shai Gilgeous-Alexander and a double-double by Josh Giddey, the Thunder were able to pull out an implausible victory against the Lakers and a quadruple-double from Russell Westbrook. I mean, even the Knicks had a 27-point lead the other day against the 76ers and managed the win so… ahem.

Here’s what else I saw and hopefully retain (crosses fingers) with last night’s games…

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The Curious Case of Kyle Kuzma

October 25, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball | 9 Comments

by: Jay

Yes, I know it’s a mouthful, but it just rolls off the tongue. Like saying Mamungkukumpurangkuntjunya Hill three times fast. And yeah I Googled that, and yes, it’s a real place in Australia. (The more you know!) Though I could have just used the Hawaiian state fish which has all the complexity but with a bit more brevity; the Humuhumu nukunuku apua, but you know, I figure why not do both to pad that sweet-sweet word count. What were we talking about again? Ah yes, one Kyle Kuzma and the curious case thereof. And it is quite the curious case, I promise! With what was once a burgeoning talent has now turned into something other than, and now with a new city, a new team, and with that a brand new system, Kuzma will at least have the opportunity to reestablish himself and his talent with the Wizards. So that’s the case, now to see what’s so curious… about Kuzma. (See that actually rolled off the tongue, no sarcasm bro.)

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2021-22 Washington Wizards Preview

October 16, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Washington Wizards |

by: Jay

Ah yes, the Washington Wizards, my hometown team. Not by choice mind you, I get my melancholy injected right into my veins by rooting for other, more storied heart-breakers such as the Clippers or Rockets depending on the year, decade, entire existence. However, as this is the franchise that is closest to me in proximity, there’s hopefully something that can be gleaned. And since it’s getting closer and closer to Halloween, we should just go ahead and call this preview The Gleaning. Scary, right? You ain’t never seen me glean, son.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

2021-22 Indiana Pacers Preview

October 12, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Indiana Pacers | 1 Comment

by: Jay

As someone who has been to Indiana, I can’t really say much about it. I mean, what can you say about the place that hasn’t already been said about Nebraska? Exactly. And yes, while I’m sure there might be a few more rivers or something like that in Nebraska, the one major difference is that John Mellencamp never wrote a song about Lincoln. The other major difference is of course Indiana gets to boast that they have the Pacers. Not pacemakers mind you, which are very popular in the state (along with the Ozarks), aye heart health joke. Regardless, I bring you the very hard-to-peg Pacers, which has a nice ring to it if we’re being non-sexual. And yes, we are being non-sexual, etiquette folks. But these non-sexualized (sorry SEO) Pacers have a chance to be anywhere from entertaining to middling and we shall gauge the levels of both after the jump…

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2021-22 Houston Rockets Preview

September 24, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Houston Rockets | 6 Comments

by: Jay

You know, there was a time before SpaceX and Blue Origin, when the only Rockets I cared about was old and busted Clyde Drexler, old and busted Charles Barkley, and of course my personal favorite player of all-time, Hakeem Olajuwon. Who, by the time the other guys showed up, was also sorta old and sorta busted. And while this little soirée into sentimentality has definitely aged me, I guess it certainly shows how far the NBA game has come along, and in most regards, how the Rockets have evolved into the team they are today. Not without bumps and heartbreak mind you, but the Rockets team we have today certainly has a lot of fluidity to it, and that’s not to describe James Harden’s weekend at the club. A mix of new and old, unspectacular and well, average spectacularness (totally a word), this team has a lot of ifs, and’s, and buts, yet still could be an interesting amalgamation of opportunity and measured success. How that comes about is the real question I suppose, and this being a team preview, we’ll at least attempt to answer it…

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2021-22 Los Angeles Lakers Fantasy Preview

September 14, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Los Angeles Lakers | 2 Comments

by: Jay

Well, we did the Clippers, so I guess it makes sense to do the Lakers. And not just because technically it ends up being a nautical extravaganza that involves sailboats on a lake (MAXIMIZING METAPHOR) but because in a lot of ways these teams act as a yin and yang together and against each other. While I’m not even sure what that fully means as an Asian-American man, all I can say is that this specific Lakers team is poised to be good (LeBron and company) but may also carry with it some frustrations (AARP and company) during the long NBA season. But as someone once said, if you never taste the sour, you’ll never know the sweet so I guess we’ll end the intro on that note for some reason…

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2021-22 Los Angeles Clippers Fantasy Preview

September 3, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Los Angeles Clippers |

by: Jay

Hello once again, Razzballers. Not sure why I’m saying hi like it’s a surprise you’re here, but we’ll just go along with it and I’ll act disappointed you didn’t bring nachos. Nachos, man, will no one think of me? As the arrival of the newest NBA season comes closer (nearer?), it’s that time again to go over the specific teams and do our yearly ritual to pontificate, debate, and articulate what we see before us. Don’t ask me why it sounds like some slogan from the corporate zeitgeist where synergistic methods on trending markets do something or whatever. I just wanted nachos. For my first preview, we’ll be tackling the Los Angeles Clippers, a franchise that has really made me question why I follow sports at all, and then I remembered I know this pain. I was born in it, molded by it. As a Padres fan, it’s always nice to see darkness, my old friend. Exiting stage left from last year’s playoffs (or right, I don’t think it matters which direction) once again in the Conference Finals was both expected and surprising. There were many caveats as to why it happened yet again, but there were also a lot of great developments that could help the Clippers in their goal to finally reach the NBA Finals. So let’s see how the Clippers are shaping up and the fantasy implications henceforth. Medieval vernacular, why not?

Please, blog, may I have some more?