Author: Jay

Jay is a longtime Razzball everything who consumes an egregious amount of Makers Mark as a vehicle to gain wisdom and augment his natural glow. Living in the D.C. area, he also likes spending time visiting the local parks and feeding lettuce to any turtles he encounters, including Mitch McConnell.

Read some of Jay's 169 posts

The Harden Long Road to Recovery

by: Jay

I’m no doctor (sorry mom!), but in my professional opinion (in which my profession is nothing besides maybe making a lot of parentheses), I believe (and feel!) that whatever injury Harden was coming back from, well, it seems to have miraculously solved itself and this is the most 100% I’ve seen James Harden in a long time, not counting the strip clubs, of course. And that’s not to act glib, anyone can smirk injury statuses, it’s pretty much tradition in all sports leagues in this day and age. But I guess it’s always nice to see the confirmation right before your eyes, so without incredulously referring to Harden’s previous injury, I think after last night’s performance scoring 29 points, grabbing 10 boards and providing an easy breezy smorgasbord (totally a phrase) of 16 assists, I think we can say that whatever ailed him does no longer. Probably his previous injury was playing with Kyrie Irving…
Here’s what else I saw during yesterday’s “truncated” basketball schedule:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Dominantas Sabonis

February 14, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball | 2 Comments

by: Jay

A play on words to describe Domantas Sabonis or what essentially translates to Domino’s Pizza in Latin… you decide! As the fallout dust settles from a wild trading deadline (and that’s just in New Jersey and Philly!), a lot of focus on the winners and losers has been discussed, pontificated, bantered, repartee’d? Repartaid? Reparty? Whatever, you get the point… maybe. And while there’s plenty of analysis of the players, generally it’s within the scope of the trade itself and lends itself to being contextually trapped. This statement probably makes way more sense in my head, so a prime example of what I’m speaking of is embodied best by Domantas Sabonis, newly acquired by the Kings in what is probably one of the more questionable trades last week. In a deal that also included Jeremy Lamb and Justin Holiday, the overall conclusion was that the Pacers came away with not just the best return, but the best player as well. Don’t get me wrong, I’m on the Tyrese Hailburton hype train as much as anyone, but the acquisition of Domas Sabonis might just be exactly what Sabonis and the Kings needed…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Clippers Powell Hour

February 7, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

While the title is a bit clunkier than my normal “flowful” (totally a word) attempts, I feel the metaphor carries some extra oomph, if only so I can type out the word oomph. Keep in mind that the pun is based on power hour, a term loosely defined as the last part of an investor’s trading day and with the recent Clipper’s acquisition (fleecing?) of Norman Powell (and Robert Covington) from the Trail Blazers, it seemed apt to sacrifice flow for accuracy. (That’s what she said.) So many parenthetical statements, so little time! And with Powell’s debut last night to the tune of 28 points on a 56/50/86 split in just 23 minutes, we’ll take a look at Powell, the Clippers, and try and answer the question why anyone still picks up the phone when Jerry West calls…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

A New Set of Ja Rules

January 31, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball | 2 Comments

by: Jay

In the game this past Saturday against the Washington Wizards, Ja Morant scored 34 points. Yeah, nothing super spectacular about that. I mean, 30+ points are still 30+ points, it’s obviously a good thing, say better than 29 points so says me, Captain Obvious. But when you look deeper at the stats, this was the 13th time this season that Morant has scored 20+ points in the paint. He’s the first guard to achieve that in the last 25 years, eclipsing both Russell Westbrook (19-20) and Dwayne Wade (05-06) who previously held that mantle. And it should be pointed out that there are still 31 games left this season. Often compared to the likes of Allen Iverson and Derrick Rose, Morant has earned that comparison by being an absolute beast, aggressively attacking the rim at all times. But is such a thing meant to last? Is there regression in store for this young star? That and more after the jump!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

My One True Love

January 25, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

At this point, I’m just going to assume everyone here knows what love is, what it does, and how it both can be both the sweet and the sour. And of course you’d never know what sweet is unless you tasted sour, which is why Chinese food is just so darn good. Having a problem? Feeling down? Feeling up? Feeling all the directions? Just eat some Crab Rangoon, easy. But despite getting myself hungry just now (eternal life struggle), we have to move forward and make the pun work, so therefore, I insert one Kevin Love into this content. And discussing his season thus far seems apropos based on last night’s performance where he led the Cavs in scoring with 20 points in a game that he only played 24 minutes and literally just shot threes. I’m not quite sure what a figurative three is, but since all of his field goal attempts (12) were beyond the arc, my statement still stands true. A relief to everyone, I’m sure…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Booker? I Don’t Even Know Her!

January 18, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes |

by: Jay

Despite the continuing drama in La La Land and the conversions it would bring writing about, I’m going to spend a bit of time on Devin Booker who dropped 48 points, six assists, five rebounds, and three steals in a win against the Spurs last night. Mmm, those sweet sweet unique hits from Phoenix… all 12 of them. I’m kidding, there’s actually a lot of people out there in the tri-state area, just too old to understand anything digital that’s not Facebook, so here we are. And even though Booker tried for 50 (was pulled with the Suns up by 10 and missing his last two shots), the stat line last night was downright dominant when you realize it may all be happening because he pointed at the Raptor. (Suns are 4-0 now since that incident by the way.) During the same span, Booker has been averaging 32.3 PPG and has carried the Suns a few times this past week all by himself, including last night’s win against the aforementioned Spurs. Best player in Arizona currently wearing #1? Don’t tell Razzball Football, but I think so…

Here’s what else I saw during last night’s games:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Wake Me Up Before You Bol-Bol

January 10, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

As has been recently reported by ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski, the Detroit Pistons are finalizing a deal to acquire Forward Bol Bol from the Denver Nuggets for Rodney McGruder and a second-round pick. While the trade hasn’t officially gone through of this writing, it’s quite nice to see a news item and an easy pun meet, like Sonny and Cher, peas and carrots, Jet Li and Delroy Lindo… but besides making the title gods weep from joy, we must also understand that there’s a lot here to talk about with Bol Bol’s trade, and I honestly can’t wait to type my Bol Bol’s out. Literally and figuratively…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Bad Tasting Curry

January 4, 2022 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball, Fantasy Basketball Daily Notes |

by: Jay

Look, if you thought I was above such a simple and obvious pun, you were wrong. But it’s okay because I actually like curry (the food) and believe there is no such thing as bad tasting curry unless you actually try. Now on the other hand, perhaps the same cannot be said of one Steph Curry who went on to have a pretty spectacular night… spectacularly bad that is which, you know, is technically a form of spectacular, so there’s that. But for a talent like Steph, it does make you raise an eyebrow (especially if you’re Spock) when you see a stat line that involves 3/17 shooting and just 1/10 from beyond the arch. Despite the Warriors win over the Heat, there is some concern with Curry’s shot lately and after last night’s attempt at becoming a certified mason (the brick-layer, not Washington’s religion!), it’s hard not to at least consider the idea that something may be just a bit off. And then you also might have to consider the idea of is he just playing terrible or shooting terrible. While the former would be a bit more obvious, I’m still willing to think it’s the latter as while wonky, he was still at +0 after missing 17 shots, which I’m still trying to figure out how you do. At the very least, with a line like 9/3/10 on the night, we can see he makes a fine Draymond Green impersonator. Which is probably not what you want from a potential MVP, but I’m sure Green doesn’t mind. Here’s what else I saw last night…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Wagner? I Don’t Even Know Her!

December 29, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

I’m sure I could have gone high-brow and done a motif-style pun on Franz Kafka and the emergence of rookie Franz Wagner, but c’mon. We got enough letters to get it to near-wang and we got an “er” at the end. I know no other brow than a low one… but let’s not lose focus on the real topic at hand, not how artful that title of this piece is, but rather how Franz Wagner is doing. And quite well probably, as he’s coming fresh off a 38 PTS, 7 REB, 3 AST performance on 12/20 shooting (4/8 from outside the arc) with a +4 in a 17-point loss against the Bucks. It’s been said that when we look back several years to this draft class, it’ll be considered legendary in skill and scope. I know it’s been said because I have also said it before and believe it to be completely true, this is probably shaping up to be one of the best draft classes ever in NBA history and I firmly believe that Wanger is a large part of that prognostication. I also got to use firm and wang in the same sentence because I realized if you type Wagner enough times, you go full Freudian, so truly the Lord works in mysterious ways.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Who Needs Poinsettias When You Have DeRozans?

December 20, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

For a question that could be right out of a Wu-Tang ballad, I find myself feeling oddly accomplished for lining up such a great seasonal and on-brand pun. It’s almost like I have 1000 more words to write and none of them will be better than what I just typed. But that’s okay, I’m a fantasy writer, disappointment is something I know very well. You think disappointment is your ally? You merely adopted it, I was born in it, molded by it. But beyond that existential despair, there lies something better, actual content focusing on DeMar DeRozan. And it’s no coincidence we’re talking (or writing) about him while coming off a big Bulls win against the Lakers with DeRozan leading the charge with 38 points, 4 rebounds and 6 assists with 19 in the fourth quarter. Now that we’re approaching the “almost the halfway” point of the season, it’s probably safe to say that this’ll be DeRozans best year-to-date, but will it be? That question will be pontificated on and more, just after the jump…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Blue Julius

December 13, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

Hey, it works several ways in that the Knicks’ main color is blue and Julius Randle’s season so far has made all of us blue! In Spanish, they call this “dos azul” but I’m not really sure who they are and why they’re talking to me. Also, I guess the Knicks’ other color is orange and I could have just gone with the better reference “Orange Julius” but nothing easy is worth doing or some such pedantic saying. Anyways, while I think most rational minds (does this count me?) had Randle marked for regression, I don’t think many of them expected this level of play in this amount of time unless it was the playoffs. (Yak-yak-yak.) So as the famous parlance of our time states: it is what it is. So after coming off an (as of this writing) 2-for-9 shooting performance (1-for-5 beyond the arch) with just eight points and seven (seis!) turnovers, one has to wonder where Randle goes from here and that’s why I’m here. Also to look good. But also to, you know, type stuff. Hopefully related to Julius Randle…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Gettin’ Wiggins Wit It

December 7, 2021 | 2021-22 Fantasy Basketball |

by: Jay

Hey Jack, it’s a fact: 1) Paprika is for men. 5) You snooze, you lose. B) ReSpEk ThE SuN. VII) Wiggins is an All-Star! What a time to be alive, especially if you are Andrew Wiggins. And watching this slow-moving transition has been quite the experience, filled with a bunch of memes and “what?” mutterings thrown about. From a young and a wild shooting wing several years ago to perhaps one of the better three-and-d players right now is quite the journey, and take it from this writer, the next stage should probably be an All-Star appearance (his first)…no? Okay, okay, that might be going a little too far, but what this post presupposes is, what if I’m not? This calls for a jiggy jump! You know, because the “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It” reference and jumping from the lede to the full post with the link below… yeah, exactly.

Please, blog, may I have some more?