As we’ve talked about in some of our intimate, 1-on-1 comments, Razzball Basketball is here to be your fantasy basketball therapist.  We coddle you through the bad breaks, get you through some SKIIIIIIIILES! frustration, help you be able to cut ties with injured players…  We’re a giant, comfy couch, and we want you to be comfortable and tell us why the fantasy gods hate you!

Well, in the same vein, you know I like to whine sometimes.  REL posts are great for that for my REL team, I sometimes get Kristaps Porzingis in 4 of 5 matchups in a hot week, etc. etc.  And I even pull in some real life whining, like today!  So, not for the first time, or the second time, but for the THIRD MF TIME in the past month, the Razzball Basketball studio’s internet got ripped from the house because a dumbass in an 18-wheeler-size Estes truck decided it was smart to drive it down our tiny side street.  That AND our good friends at Time Warner Cable assured us that the second time this happened, that it would be high enough to avoid large trucks.  The level of incompetency is unparalleled…  Well, I take that back, it’s about as competent as Mike Malone running his Denver rotations.  We talked about this in the comments that maybe he needs to become MALLLLLLLLLONNNNNNEEE!  …or something to that effect.  Just like ripping out a millennial’s life blood by taking out my internet, Malone has a team ritual every night, where he snatches up a fantasy basketball player and ties him up in the Denver locker room, and right before every game chants “KALI MA!  KALI MA!” and rips the poor guy’s beating heart out.  Depending on how many beats it has left is how long he plays Jusuf Nurkic.  Dude was playing fine last night!  11/3/1 in 17 minutes, with an efficient 4-6 FG and 3-4 FT – did have the 2 TO – but doesn’t play the final 22 minutes.  Even the poor Kenneth Faried owners got wrapped up in this mess, as Manimal played the opening 4 minutes, then didn’t play the rest of the first half, and got only 11 minutes total.  So you’re thinking big Nikola Jokic game right?!  21 minutes…  Joke was solid though, going 14/11/3/0/1 on 5-7 FG and 4-4 FT.  This is such a Temple of Doom, that even though it’s pretty common knowledge you should’ve been getting out ASAP, now it’s time to get out ASAP-er!  Drop Nurk, trade Joke off this game, I’m probably even dropping Faried.  Maybe in 12ers or limited-move RCLs you can give it one more game, but this was a good matchup against the Mess (even though Brook Lopez is playing on the perimeter now, maybe that screwed some stuff up), and if Malone has Faried in his doghouse, watch him start Darrell Arthur or some junk next Denver game.  Frustrating night!  Since I’m rushing through the notes at a Starbucks, this is going to be a lighter Daily Notes, so apologies for the brevity!  But I’ll be around for comments as always, so if something big happened I missed/you want to talk about, shoot your thoughts below!  Here’s what else happened last night in Fantasy Basketball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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I was incredibly bummed out about not getting a hold of Troy Daniels in the REL.  He’s purely a thragnof option, but he’s been one of my favorite players for the last few years.  Troy is the type of guy that you can bring off the bench while playing NBA 2k, and after you splash 5 threes with him, your opponent won’t know what hit them.  Unfortunately, the secret is now out.  Troy Daniels can shoot the lights out.  Since he isn’t available in that many leagues at this point, I won’t spend any time outside of this section on him, but if he is floating around on your wire, then grab him if you need a whole lot of treys and points.  Enough about my pet players, let’s get into it!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Wazzup Razzers!  It’s good to be back.  I hope it’s not inappropriate, but we need to get a little saucy starting out!  Nik Stauskas has hit 2+ treys in his last 8 games – this is fantastic news for anyone needing some help in points and threes.  Plus, he’s only 14% owned!  He shoots a great percentage, and he won’t hurt you anywhere.  Definitely a solid back of the bench piece.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ahhhhh, DeMarcus Cousins. Build like a brick shithouse (did I get that phrase right?), puts up monster numbers, and the Kings franchise is terrible. We need a change of scenery! After years of speculation and “Lord give me strength” tweets, it looks like this year might finally be the year.

Boogie went nuts last night against the Wizards, going 36/20/4/2/1 (Goromotaro!), but the Kings still got another kick in the SAC in the OT loss. Cousins tried to put this team on his back! Scored the pivotal last two baskets to put it into extra time, but the Wizards are like the Borg. “Resistance is futile!”

Trekkie jokes! Despite the huge line and burning Marcin Gortat on drives, Boogie still did Boogie things, with 5 TO and 3-10 FT. I saw he almost got a technical foul by complaining to the rim! “Is that goal regulation size or WHAT?!” Even though he has 32+ points in the past 4, the D stats are down, and a looming trade would inevitably hurt his value. Actually, staying put would hurt too, as he’d be a major DNP candidate. One Boogie rumor is that he could be playing for last night’s enemy, and reuniting with Kentucky teammate John Wall. It would probably take Bradley Beal and some pieces, likely some picks thrown in there too, but the Wizards look like they need a shake-up, I think we can all agree there. Scotty Brooks can manage superstar personalities, and might be the best coach for Cousins. That said, the Wiz are 4-2 over the past 6, and might be ever-so-slightly turning it around.

With the trade rumor mill churning and the D stats down (giving Boogie a surprisingly-low 19th per-game valuation on BBmonster), I think now is the time to shop him around. You’re feeling great with your returns if you got him in the second round, so maybe a fantasy owner will want to take on Boogie’s temperamental stats more aggressively than an NBA GM. That is, if this hypothetical NBA GM isn’t a big fantasy player! Although if the GM plays in 8-cat, he’ll spend like crazzzzzzy to get Boogie! Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Choo Choo!

Watch out league, The Dieng Train is about to run ya over like you’re Magic defenders! Our season chugs along through Thanksgiving (although with our jeans barely fitting), heading into December with 3 guys flirting with Oscar Robinson for tripdub averages, Brow looking redonk, and a multitude of other breakouts and disappointments, but I don’t want the Dieng Train to slip under the radar! Like a German train station, Gorgui Dieng remains regular, consistent, and otherwise just mundane, bringing true multicat performance after performance from a big (minus treys). After a slow-ish start, the Dieng Train put together a nice weekend with a rainbow 11/7/2/3/4 against the Suns, then 15/6/2/1/2 in a tough-matchup-for-a-big against the Warriors. And even though I said “minus treys”, he actually hit a triple in each of them! Shot 11-22 overall, committed only 2 combined TO, and after hitting only 6 treys last year, maybe this is a part of his game we’ll start to see expand. Before you Dieng Train detractors type “BORING!” in the comments, I know his per-36 is a smidge down from last year. That said, he’s played 36+ minutes in 4 of the past 5 games, and it’s all due to that beautiful, cuddly, Tibby Tibs treatment. Run your starters to death! But well, when one of your starters is a effin’ train, you ride that rail! Here’s what else went down over Thanksgiving weekend in fantasy basketball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Could there be anyone else in the NBA that everyone can get behind and root for than Jrue Holiday?!  At this rate, he needs to run for prez in 2020!  And just to make him even more likable, he’s now wearing rec spec goggles.  Soooooooo dope!  It’s like he’s playing ball underwater!  When he hit this stepback, I’m pretty sure I heard him say “you miss me?!” on the game broadcast, but I have a feeling it was my mind playing tricks on me…

Jrue didn’t take any time to shake off the rust, going 21/2/7/1/1 on 8-14 shooting against the Blazers Friday night (including that sexy crossover), then 22/2/9/1/0 on 9-17 shooting against the Hornets on Saturday.  14:4 AST:TO to start it off, shot over 50% both games…  Just so awesome!  I know what I’m thankful for!  And just to make things EVEN MORE awesome, he rewarded Tim Frazier owners who remained patient, by showing they can co-exist.  Bi-partisan!  12/3/8 and 17/5/8 for Frazier in those two games, plus the Pelicans won both of them.  And they weren’t against cupcakes either, winning at home against the Blazers then the Hornets.  Pass the beignets, we got a party goin on!  As a Frazier owner in a couple RCLs, I’m going to hang strong until his numbers tell me otherwise.  Unfortunately, I’m not a Jrue owner anywhere though…  Depressing!  But I don’t even care, Jrue is a boss, and if he beats me in some fantasy matchups, I will tip my cap and be rooting for him anyway.  You’re my boy, Jrue!  Here’s what else went down over the weekend in fantasy hoops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Save your horse, and ride a… Justin Hamilton?! As we coined on the Podcast, the coach of the Nets has officially changed his name. It’s even on his newly issued Birth Certificate! It’s no longer Kenny Atkinson. While Brooks wears his giant cowboy hat, Kenny literally wears his ass on his head. He is forever more: Kenny Asshat. I’d love to make that my Halloween costume!

After that shockingly low-run debut, Brook Lopez persevered in game two with a 25/5/1/1/0 line in only 26 minutes on Friday night. Maybe the most shocking aspect of that game was the Nets actually won an NBA game! Then on Saturday afternoon, we get word Brolo is going to get a healthy DNP-rest. Mother F Asshat! Because of course after 2+ healthy seasons including playing 33+ MPG last year, Brook is an injury risk. This is a ticking time bomb in Brooklyn… Asshat wants to chuck as many 3s as possible; through Saturday night’s game, Brooklyn’s 37.3 3PA were second in the NBA, only to the Mavericks who had an OT game then played Houston. 42% of their shots are treys, which leads the league thus far (small sample of course). Even in that “good” game from Brolo Friday night, he shot 0-4 from deep, giving him 6 3PTA this season. His career high 3PTA?! 14 last year for 0.2 a game. 3.0 thus far in 16-17. A big part of his value has been game-to-game reliability and FG%, and now we’re not going to get either. Asshat really wants to pound Brook’s square peg in a round hole, and we all know Asshat has a big round hole! What a mess this team is. Hopefully you don’t have too many shares of Brolo, and if you do, you’re really forced to hold as best you can. No one is giving you anything for him… But at least it opens some opportunities, with Hamilton now a streamer even in 12ers, and you know the rest of your Nets are all going to have ThrAGNOF streamability. Asshat playing his team like Duke. Shooting nothing but 3s… So annoying! No UNC bias there… I don’t think Asshat got the memo that the NBA perimeter is further out… Smh. Here’s what else went down over the weekend in Fantasy Basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We did it! YES WE CAN!! Make rankings great again! Oh man, I’m ready for election season to be over… But I’m even more ready to have my top 200 out into the world!

So I don’t really have a sound philosophy for these final ranks… We do all of our rankings for 12-team, 9-cat H2H, since that’s how we play our Razzball Commenter Leagues. Shameless promo time! We need more RCL Players out there in Razzball Nation! Just follow that link and either start up or join an open league today! Anywho, in a 12-team RCL league (13 roster spots), you’re only drafting 156 players, so most of these ranks are guys you’re not drafting. Do I rank guys all as sleepers for your final pick? I’m not sure that really helps anyone. So the final ranks here are a blend of sleeper potential, and possible last-roster-spot-usability for a specific build. Is Arron Afflalo REALLY going to be your last pick? Meh, probably not, but maybe he has a hot month and it could be the first month! You never know… If you’re still catching up, check out all our ranks in the Top-10, Top-25, Top-50, Top-75, Top-100 & Top 150 which you can also find linked above in the 2016-17 Ranks menu. Here’s our final big rankings post, the Top 200 for the 2016-17 Fantasy Basketball Season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As we prepare for the 2016-17 Fantasy Basketball Season, I’ll be taking a look at each NBA team with their major adds and drops to see if we can pan for any surprise rotational gold.  This open is especially witty for the Nuggets.  We’ll be counting down from worst NBA regular season to the best, mainly because I’m still figuring out how to rank the Warriors…

Sacramento Kings (33-49)

Kings

Key Acquisitions:

Arron Afflalo

Matt Barnes

G Ty Lawson

F Anthony Tolliver

C Georgios Papagiannis (Rookie)

Garrett Temple

G Malachi Richardson (Rookie)

F/C Skal Labissiere (Rookie)

G Isaiah Cousins (Rookie)

Key Losses:

G Rajon Rondo

Marco Belinelli

G Seth Curry

G James Anderson

F Quincy Acy

The last remaining semblance that this organization had anything under control…

Man, hard to believe the laughing stock of the West had at least a bearable record.  I thought they were a sub-30 win team!  I guess Rondo is worth a few wins above replacement…  Dammit, I’m still in baseball mode!

Let’s not cut corners – this still looks like a pretty brutal squad.  Especially when you factor in a suspension to one of your key guys, his backup has bad suspension issues of his own, and your option B scorer is just trying to burn bridges on the way out, hoping and praying for a trade before the season.  Lord give me strength!  Here’s how the Kings roster is coming together (or falling apart…):

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Man, crazypants Thursday night!  I know what you’re all thinking…  “A live reaction to the madness would be better!”  Well, hopefully you downloaded and listened to our Draft Day Live Podcast!  If not, listen to it while reading this if you have a fluky-good, multi-tasking mind.  It’s tough for me to read while listening to a Podcast, it’s like that feeling when someone just starts shouting random numbers at you when you’re trying to count.  1-2-3-4-5 “17!” 6-7-8 “22!” 8… 8…  ugh, I lost my spot!  Assholes…

The first 9 picks went fairly unsurprisingly, although we did miss on virtually everything in our Mock Draft.  Pretty sure I beat Slim 2-1 overall (edit – ugghhhh Slim’s right he got Zizic, we tied, ahhhhh!)!  Then when the Bucks made their 10th pick…  All hell broke loose!  Dudes I joked around about as 2nd round sleepers getting picked in the lottery, Suns making baller trades, someone’s twitter getting hacked…  Oh wait, that was the NFL draft.  I guess it wasn’t quite THAT crazy!  Here’s my analysis for each rookie’s fantasy impact, along with my grade for each team’s pick in a real-life context and my guess at where each rookie will rank in my 2016-17 redraft rankings to come out this summer:

Please, blog, may I have some more?