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I don’t know much about science books. Don’t know much about the french I took… So, I caught the old film: “Stand by Me” on the weekend, waiting for the big game (Raps vs Nets, obviously), and that song stuck with me, almost like a prophecy. It’s true, I DON’T know much about science books! Get out of my head, old song!  What I do know, is that trades are harder to get done late in the fantasy season. Fantasy GMs are much more reluctant to give up players of value, even to get players of equal value back, in my experience. So At this point in the season, I reject the “my Danilo Gallinari for your Russell Westbrook” trades, and focus on the waiver a little more. If you also “don’t know much about history, or much biology,” why not take a look at some of these waiver gems, hmm?

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Yup. That old chestnut. The guy who might benefit from the other guys going down with injury. If you’re in a league like I am, many of my opposing fantasy GMs are reluctant to pull the trigger on a bigger deal this time of year, so sometimes going after smaller fish to stream while their value is elevated might be the answer. The most common cause of increased value is injury giving minutes to a bench guy. And by February, there are several injuries, mostly short term, some longer, that create the next man up situation that may be able to boost your production. Let’s take a look at some of those candidates, shall we?

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Mid-January approaches. I am about to be snowed in up in Toronto, so I am acutely aware that we are in the thick of winter. If you follow an NBA team’s social media, you likely have been getting the email prompts to vote in your potential All Stars. If you didn’t know, I am a long-suffering Raptors fan, and I’m finally getting rewarded for all those dark days with a team that is finally relevant. I got the prompt to vote in Kyle Lowry and  DeMar DeRozan, both deserving of the honour, and I should expect they will make the Eastern All Star team, either through fan voting, or by coach appointment. But all that glitters ain’t gold, and there are several players that are on the voting ballot that aren’t skilled enough for that lofty appointment, both in real life, as well as from a fantasy perspective. So lets take a gander at which All Star hopefuls are made of gold, and who’s just made out of tin:

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Happy New Year, one and all. You have burnt the yule log down to ash, and done drunk the eggnog up.  Now it’s New Year’s resolutions, and old year’s regret. I don’t want to be negative, however, as 2017 is still a wee baby, and we can nurture it along to be a fantasy monster. What are your ideas on how to do this? Me? I think you may want to consider making a deal for one of the players that may be on the move.  Who could that be, he asked speculatively? Let’s take a looksie, m’kay?

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Just hear those sleigh bells jingling, ring ting tingling toooooo… Come on it’s lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with youuuuu… Never gets old. I hope Santa was good to you, and delivered your heart’s desire. Me, I avoided a lump of coal, which is a win in my books. I know we are all enjoying the eggnog, honeyed ham and Christmas basketball at this time of year, and if you’re like me, you are content to park the moneymaker on the couch and soak it all in.  So I’m going to briefly mention a few things I’m thankful for in fantasy basketball, and a few New Year’s resolutions I’m making on behalf of some NBA ballers, and we can all get back to gorging ourselves while surrounded by weird relatives in Christmas sweaters like the little baby Jesus intended us to:

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I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I neeeed… Ok, my Mariah impression doesn’t exactly translate well into print, but let me assure you, I murder at Christmas karaoke. I guess I should throw a bunch of things on the fantasy wish list, but for this abbreviated Christmas edition of the buy/sell, all I want for Christmas is blocks. The rejection is one of the more commanding categories in fantasy basketball, and simply put, the swat is a thing of beauty. A rim protector can almost single-handedly win you the weekly category. Therefore, there is particular value in the few who excel at the Mutumbo finger-wag, waiting to be snapped up, or parlayed into other assets. It’s a pretty exclusive list, but it’s better than a lump of coal, amirite? Let’s take a look at the long limbed defenders, hmm?

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I was happily watching my beloved basketball, and enjoying, yet all the while feeling old. I reminisce about the good old days. The bulls were winning 72 games, shorts had just gotten longer, the only tattoos were on Dennis “the Worm” Rodman, and Centres were lumbering lumpy giant dudes like Bill Cartwright and Rasho Nesterovic, with undefined arms and soft hands, like a baby’s bottom. It was a simpler time. You could be a geek, and still dominate the NBA, a la John Stockton, who was a millionaire, and never stopped getting his mom to cut his hair, apparently. The league, while being dominated by the likes of freaks like Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen, still had room for geeks to make their mark. Heck, the biggest geek of them all, the illustrious Larry Bird, the one lumpy to rule them all, still played in 1992. Is there space for Geeks in today’s league, or is there only to be athletic freaks from now on? Let’s take a look at a few from each column, and see if they fit the description, hmmm?

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We all know that injury is a part of professional sports. I would like to think that most fans don’t wish it on anyone, but when it does happen, and players are forced to miss games, nobody should feel sorry for the team that got got. It’s why there are 15 roster spots on a squad. And while it may suck to see a guy go down to injury, it creates opportunity. Opportunity for the next man to step up. So lets take a look at what the injury bug has done to the line ups lately, Hmmm?

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I hope all of you enjoyed your fair share of Turkey and fixings this past Thanksgiving! The shortened week always messes me up. Or is it the L-Tryptophan? For this of you who don’t know, or have never seen that Seinfeld episode, Tryptophan is an amino acid released in proteins (especially present in Turkey), that will induce lethargy and/or sleep. After this weekend, perhaps we should take a look at which Fantasy Basketball players overindulged this week, and who has been flying right:

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The Bird is the word this week, gentle reader. I know that Thanksgiving themes are played out, but if you’ve ever read any of my previous articles, you will know that I can’t resist the low hanging fruit. My vertical won’t really allow for anything but the lower branches anyhow. So what are you thankful for good reader? Jrue HolidayKristaps Porzingus? Donald J Trump? Whatever it is that makes you thankful, we all remind ourselves that in fantasy there is a yin and then there is a yang. (Stat)Stuffers, and Turkeys, as the title suggests. So loosen your belt, Fantasy GM, pass the gravy, and let’s take a hearty serving of both on our plates:

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Ah, the early weeks of the fantasy season, when a young man’s or woman’s fancy turns to love. Love of the game, love of that reach you made for Gordon Hayward in the draft when others were worried about his injury. Love of how good your picks look thus far, and how bad your opponents picks look. Because everyone has a chance at this stage, right? And that’s good for the game, no? Somewhere out there, somebody is giddy that they selected JJ Barea in the later rounds. Others are pleased that they nabbed a tasty morsel, or pleased their blue chip pick is performing as advertised. The scientific term is the honeymoon phase, and fella, you are smack-dab in the middle. At this time people often complain that it’s hard to make trades, so while I will make some trade recommendations, I will also comb the waiver for you, gentle reader, to try to polish the proverbial turd for you to grab. Let take a look at what is to be had:

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Everythang we do is funky up in heaaah! I love how so many cats have been laying down the nasty funk these first few weeks in the N.B.A., and not your regular humdrum contributors! It makes for interesting fantasy trade bait, you dig? Ok, I may not be able to lay down the fresh jive in the caliber of the late great host of Soul Train, Don Cornelius for you, but I appreciate the art form of weaving sexy soul into speak. And some of the early season performances from our fantasy faithful have been nothing short of artisanal. But are these performances going to endure like Jay-Z, or be a flash in the pan like Kris Kross? Let’s take a look at a few cats that are Big Pimpin, and the wannabes who fake the funk, and come off wiggity whack: (I realize that I jump from funk to hip hop analogies, but you get the gist, leave it be, good reader, I’m on a deadline here.)

Please, blog, may I have some more?