“1,000, 1,001, 1,002, 1,003. ¬†Wow, I can hardly lift my left arm I did so many. I don’t know if you heard me, but I did over¬†1,000.” ¬†Maybe should’ve stopped at like 40! ¬†Kyrie Irving strained his left biceps a couple weeks ago, sending owners into a furious frenzy of wire replacements. ¬†And one of the most fun times of the year (although you could argue most frustrating) is when the fringe or struggling playoff teams make drastic moves. ¬†Well, I would argue dropping Kyrie when news hit wasn’t a drastic move, but I think you all know what I’m saying in H2H leagues. ¬†After a very positive reevaluation, Uncle Drew was cleared for practice yesterday and could return as soon as tomorrow. ¬†Talk about positivity! ¬†While the game tomorrow against the Magic seems questionable, there still is cloudy uncertainty. ¬†Both that game and the Cavs next on Friday at the Hawks are on very busy, heavily-scheduled days. ¬†Of course when healthy, Kyrie is a no-brainer, but I’d imagine his first game back comes with a little bit of training wheels. ¬†So if you’re in your final week in your title hopes, I’m not seeing an immediacy in picking him up. ¬†But if your finals are next week, or a two-week final, go ahead and Cry Uncle. ¬†Wait, that doesn’t mean what I was hoping. ¬†Go ahead and pry Uncle? ¬†Eh… ¬†In Roto, hopefully you held Kyrie as that’s what I would’ve done. ¬†Looking ahead to next week, it’s sadly only three games for the Cavs, but stay positive! ¬†One against Detroit and another against da Bucks. ¬†Gotta like those. ¬†Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball action:
Ramon Sessions –¬†Dr. Drake Ramoray’s Venezuelan half brother! ¬†Well, he’s from Myrtle Beach, that’s kinda the Venezuela of the southeast if you ask me… 20/5/11, rocking out the dimebag, and boosting your FT% like I always rave about with Sessions, going 9-11. ¬†Must-own down the stretch.
Brandon Knight –¬†25/9/7 and I hope he doesn’t stay too hot through the rest of the season so I can be all over him again next year.
Indiana Pacers –¬†Yikes. ¬†They bad.
Roy Hibbert –¬†Does have a 5-block game in there, but also zero blocks in three of the past five including last night. ¬†7 was his high rebounding total from the past six, not topping 5 before that. ¬†His numbers eerily look like Kyle O’Quinn‘s right now.
Tim Duncan –¬†Not a big scoring day, but 9/6/4/1/3 is a really solid multi-cat that way outperforms a DNP-CD. ¬†I don’t even know when he last sat. ¬†In 2013? ¬†Hah, probably just means it’s coming, but man, playing every Spurs outing virtually through the whole playoffs has been “Timmay!”-outburst worthy.
Timofey Mozgov –¬†With J.J. the lame plane not siphoning off minutes, Healthcare.Mozgov can finally prove to Republicans his value! ¬†Huge 23/10/1/0/1 line from the Thabeet from St. Pete. ¬†I imagine him playing this game with all the panache of being shirtless riding a horse.
Drew Gooden –¬†Just when you thought his AARP membership was back to silver, BOOM! Platinum baby! ¬†Wait, I dunno where I was going with that… Two rough games in a row, and really three in a row with an empty 15/3/0/1/0 before those. ¬†Now hot, with two straight of solid production with 12/8/2/2/0 and no TOs last night.
Thaddeus Young –¬†Thrainbow line! ¬†23/3/4/4/3 with five treys. ¬†Shot 7-10, 4-4 FT, and this uber-% boosting, multi-cat orgasm-inducing line means yet another Philly loss. ¬†But not for fantasy owners! ¬†Man that was a sick flow right there.
Paul Millsap – Had a commenter worried about his mini-slump, but I said be steadfast! ¬†Huge eruption, and the best way to get out of any sort of funk – against the awful 76ers. ¬†They’re the Cialis of fantasy flaccid-ness. Are they called the 76ers because they almost lost 76 games this year? ¬†Sheesh! ¬†28/17/4/3/0 for Millsap including a trey.
Tony Wroten –¬†Tore up Detroit (shocker…) but looked awful last night. ¬†I think Brandon Jennings‘ and Josh Smith‘s terrible ratio ways rubbed off on him from that game…
Zaza Pachulia –¬†“I make Noah!” ¬†12/13/6/0/3 in one of the more preposterous lines of March. ¬†The Pistons are just a defensive travesty. ¬†And with such good athletes too! ¬†I think even they are ready to tune out basketball and follow the Tigers.
Greivis Vasquez –¬†ThrAGNOF alert! ¬†17/0/1/0/0 with 4 TOs and three treys. ¬†Hell, put me on an NBA court for 23 minutes and I might be able to do that!
LeBron James –¬†I remember way back when, when I was just a young lad, ESPN played a high school basketball game. ¬†I wasn’t hardcore into basketball anymore after the Hornets left Charlotte, plus thought it was weird high school was on (no idea of anyone in the game), but I had nothing else better to do. ¬†Then some dude had a through the legs step back three pointer and looked like he was the center. ¬†Ah, memories…
Birdman –¬†He flyeth! ¬†Multi-blocks in five of the last six with another pair last night. ¬†His consistency is as the crow flies, or something like that…
DeMarcus Cousins –¬†If last night’s 35/14/3/1/2 shooting 13-18 (9-12 FT) is any indication, he might be the most important player in Finals week.
Ray McCallum –¬†Yesterday: “Solid run for Ray-Mac with no IT2, and would be a fine plug-n-play if still available and no IT2 tonight.” ¬†Today: no IT2 and career best game! ¬†22/2/10/2/0.
Anthony Davis –¬†RainBrow!
Anthony Morrow –¬†It’s like playing the deep league slots. ¬†I thought he’d get some decent run to round out the year given the Pelicans injuries. ¬†Sometimes it happens, sometimes no so much. ¬†Last night it happened. ¬†23/3/1/2/0 with four treys and no TOs. ¬†If only his PT was a given…
D.J. Augustin –¬†Whelp! ¬†Gasp! ¬†Ker-plut! ¬†Shot only 1-9 for 4 points after putting 33 Sunday. ¬†But dimebag it up! ¬†11 treys. ¬†I gotta admit, that surprised me. ¬†This game was an absolute snoozer. ¬†I haven’t yawned that much since I tried to sit through S.W.A.T.
Jared Sullinger –¬†Looked awful and got a bloody nose. ¬†Funny tidbit, the commentators saw it bleeding and someone tried to dish to Sully inside and the announcer goes, “Don’t pass it to me, I’m bleedin’!” ¬†Hah!
Matt Barnes –¬†I called him a must-own with the Blake Griffin injury, the minutes were there already, but figured a few more boards and shot attempts would come his way. ¬†19/6/3/2/0 with three treys. ¬†Barnesburner!
Nikola Pekovic –¬†Had to leave after only 7 minutes with continued ankle soreness. ¬†Well, there goes that! ¬†Like the apes in Spaceballs would say, “There goes the Planet!” ¬†Might get shut down, and while Gorgui Dieng only got 19 minutes yesterday, he still shined for 14/4/3/3/1 shooting 4-4 and 6-6 FT. ¬†Yeah, be sure and re-grab Dieng.
Enes Kanter –¬†Yo-yoed back to the bench. ¬†12/6/0/0/0 as he provides nothing in other cats yet again. ¬†Womp womp.
Next Game: ¬†TNT OT on Tuesday again! ¬†HOU at BKN in what is actually a really entertaining game. ¬†More deliberate Nets vs. up-tempo Rox. ¬†Be sure to tune in, and hope you got a good start in your Finals!