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Killian Hayes (11 percent owned in Yahoo!) has been a disappointment in his brief career, but there’s a chance he can help out your fantasy team. Ironically, the less he shoots the more value he provides because his field goal percentage is likely to remain low all season long. He can help in hard to get categories like assists and defensive stats though. Getting more minutes in his last two games has led to 3.5 dimes, 1.5 thefts, and 1.0 blocks per. He’s not worth a pickup yet, but don’t dismiss the thought.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

There are times when it’s okay to love your cousin. If he/she is hot….and you are the only people on an island in the middle of nowhere. If you live down South. Ha! I kid. Seriously though, many places allow love and marriage to a cousin. Even in the US of A, 19 states allow marriage to first cousins and 41 allow them to live together. In Amish society, their group is relatively small in number and marriage outside of their religion is forbidden. Simple suppy, demand, and survival equation there. Don’t sweat it fellow fantasy basketballer, though. You can love DeMarcus Cousins without shame or remorse.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
24 11 3 1 3 1 1/4 9/15 5/5

Played 31 minutes, the first time eclipsing the 30 minute mark all season. Steve Kerr did mention recently that he will ramp up the minutes for Cousins. Well, it’s good to know that Kerr is not a liar. Over the past four games, Cousins has been a top 30 player, averaging 16.5 points, 1 tres, 11.3 boards, 3.3 dimes, 1.5 steals, and 2 blocks. The 41% from the field isn’t good (43% on the season), but he’s shooting 88% from the line (78% on the season). Man, I was wrong about Cousins, as I didn’t think he’d be able to come back from that Achilles injury. Much love Cousins. Much love.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

P. S. stands for postscript, which comes from the Latin word postscriptum and literally means “written after.” It’s used for an afterthought, not cool enough to be a part of the main piece. Like, oh by the way, I forgot to mention this but blah blah blah. It gets a bad rap, but as Shaun Usher of the Wall Street Journal wrote, “The P. S. is the most charming part of a letter. It’s the wink you give as you walk away.” It’s the cherry on top, the bam for the wham, and the mic drop. Like, P. S. – You the shiznitz. What? What?! Which segues perfectly to Pascal Siakam.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
44 10 2 0 3 4 4/5 15/25 10/12

A career-high in points scored. On the season, Siakam has been a top 40 player, but over the past four games, he’s been top 25. The usage rate has spiked to 28 and he’s averaged 35.3 minutes, 26 points, 1.5 tres, 9 boards, 3 dimes, 1.3 steals, and 1 block while shooting 50% from the field and 81% from the line on 8 attempts! He literally does it all. Like literally, as he can play center or be a point forward. The improvement in his game has been nothing short of amazing. P. S. is no longer an afterthought and has to be a no-brainer for Most Improved Player.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

G – General Audiences. PG – Parental Guidance Suggested. PG-13 – Parents Strongly Cautioned. R – Restricted. NC-17 – Adults Only. Then it jumps to XXX. Unfortunately, this is not a category for Xander Cage, but more of the Pornhub variety. That’s obviously NSFW. Well, we need to have a new category thanks to Paul George. PG NSFW.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
47 12 10 2 0 2 8/13 15/26 9/11

Children can still watch because there is no nudity or violence, but his performances have been NSFW because he’s been turning defenders into mush. Like the scorpion who injects venom into its prey and liquifies the insides. Plus, all the hooting, hollering, and people trying to copy his moves in the workplace is not safe. Man, I’m still so sad that PG is not a Laker. As you’ll see later, too much crying for me in one post. Anyways, PG has been freaking unbelievable this season. He’s the #3 player for fantasy, and he’s been there consistently all season long. Over the past six games, he’s the #2 player!!! The usage rate has been 33 and he’s been averaging 23 shot attempts, 38 points, 5,8 tres, 6.8 boards, 2.8 dimes, and 2.3 steals. His performance has been porn for his owners all season long.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

There are some things in life that we can’t refrain from doing. When you text a crush and you see the reply bubble, you writhe with anticipation. When you drive by an accident and talk shit about all the people rubber necking, of course you gawk because traffic has slowed down anyways. When you buy a lottery ticket, you mental masturbate about what you would do if you won. When James Harden plays basketball, no matter how many times I’ve written him as the lede, I have to do it again because he keeps doing ridiculousness.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
57 9 2 2 1 5 6/15 17/33 17/18

In 34 minutes! With a supporting cast of P. J. Tucker, Daniel House Jr., Nene Hilario, and Austin Rivers!! Harden had a usage rate of 57.5 last night!!! His true shooting percentage was 69.6!!!! Exclamation points are no longer sufficient to capture the essence of what he’s doing. You ever seen the movie Boomerang?

That’s where we’re at with Harden. He’s making it difficult for NBA defenses. He’s making it difficult for me not to write him as the lede every night. He’s making it difficult for us to even comprehend what he’s doing. Harden difficult indeed.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?