All preseason, Mike D’Antoni and the Knicks left a shroud of mystery surrounding the two-spot  the likes of which ain’t been seen since Carmen Sandiego was in Budapest, no Algiers, no Greenland. All good things like the shooting guard mystery and Rocapella must come to an end. Unfortunately, just as Carmen Sandiego was never really contained as much as she was paused, so continues the hunt for a sturdy SG. Rookie Landry Fields beat out Wilson Chandler, Toney Douglas, Roger Mason Jr. and Bill Walker for the spot. Fields averaged 9/3/1 during seven preseason games with about 1.3 treys to boot. I’ve already seen Fields snatched up in deep leagues, which is fine if you’ve got room to spare. The problem with Fields is that the Knicks don’t have room to spare. He may be the starter today, but the two-slot for the Knicks is like fashion designing: one day you’re in. The next day, you’re out. You know what else is like fashion to D’Antoni? Fashion. Have you seen his neckties? Beautiful.

And now, typed from New York: it’s Opening Night!!!

Andre Iguodala – Will likely sit out the season opener. We’re not even 24 hours into the season and already Iggy and Samuel Dalembert are going to miss games this season after missing zero in the last three. Earthquakes, volcanoes! Rivers and seas boiling! Dogs and cats living together – mass hysteria! Lou Williams and Evan Turner will get the lion’s share of the minutes. UPDATE: It looks like he’ll play. It also looks like he might play poorly until his wrist is less limp.

Chris Douglas-Roberts – Out a month after getting five across the eyes on Sunday. Actually it was just one and it was in the eye, not across it. The infliction of this injury was  efficient enough that clearly Brandon Jennings is not to blame. 

Anthony Randolph – Injured his ankle and will miss Wednesday’s Game 1. It doesn’t appear to be more serious than a missed game or two. This is, after all, Ant Rand. He shall let no man or ankle hold him back from excellence and achievement.

Tyronne Lue – Why is Tyronne Lue still employed by the NBA? Has he put on a jersey in the last five seasons? Every friggin’ year – there’s Tyronne Lue at the end of some team’s bench looking depressed. It’s bummin’ me out.

Dwyane Wade – Wade didn’t have any of the numbers owners were hoping for, including this number: 1. Is that the number of times Wade will see his kids for the remainder of the year? No. Is that the number of times some smartass reporter will call Wade “Flash” before he snaps? Nah. How ’bout the number of losses Eric Spoelstra is allowed to earn after tonight before he’s fired? Probably, but not what I was getting at. Well what then? It’s Wade’s ast/tov ratio. He had six of each. Relax. Breath into a paper bag. Wait. No, not that one. That one has my lunch in it. Why would you breath into a bag with a sandwich and three string cheeses in it? Never mind why my lunch consists of a sandwich and three string cheeses, this is about Dwyane Wade!

Chris Bosh – Earned eight points on 3-of-11 from the field. Ugh. I can’t even look him in the eye.

Glen Davis – 29 minutes, 13/5. This ain’t nothin’ now. Might not be nothin’ later. But if it turns into something later, you’ll want to start paying attention now.

Karl Malone – “Aw sweet! A commercial with The Mailman! What shoes are those? adidas? Wait. Oh, no! No Karl, no! Those aren’t Shape-Ups, are they? Tell me my second-favorite basketball player of all-time isn’t in a commercial for … dammit, Karl!”

Steve Nash – Nine turnovers. More like Leave Trash.

Hedo Turkoglu – 6/3/2 on 2-for-7 shooting. While I choose to chalk up all other poor performances from the first game as rust and adjustment, I choose to believe this will be the Turk Phoenix gets.

Nicolas Batum – 19/11 (including three treys) in 26 minutes (fewer than any of the other starters on the team). This doesn’t blow my mind. It shouldn’t blow yours.

Wesley Matthews – If there was any doubt who the first man off the Portland bench will be, Matthews dropped 13/6/3 in 30 minutes. I know, I know. Wesley sounds more like the PowerPoint guru at your office than a viable fantasy option. I don’t like it either. I’m still not over the Kevin Martin situation.

Shannon Brown – Speaking of undesirable basketball names, Shannon scored 16 points (four treys) in 21 minutes off the bench. Watch out Devin Harris. Apparently, Jordan Farmar sucks the good out of players.

Luis Scola – 18/16/4 with no blocks. Hey, pretty girls get blemishes too.

Yao Ming – Committed his sixth foul right before reaching his 24 minute limit. With the tiMing parameters put on Yao, I’m hoping for a series of games in which Yao starts swinging wildly at the 23rd minute.

  1. barker says:

    18 team league players aren’t off waivers yet

    use my #7 waiver priority to drop jason williams for pryzbilla reggie evans kapono or marquis daniels

    have a soft spot for pryzbilla (drafted him last yr in the same league hoping for oden injury — we know how that worked out) but evans is supposedly starting but how long could that possibly last with amir johnson there and it seems kapono starting is just a gimmick

  2. Quintero says:

    First roundup, and a great one! Good shizz on predicting Yao’s behaving, that’s gonna be a hit.

  3. barker says:

    16 team
    drop kris humphries for bill walker

    what are your thoughts on jeremy lin??

  4. Adam

    Adam says:

    @barker: Depends on need, but generally I like Kapono, Daniels, Evans, Pryzbilla in that order.

    @Quintero: Literally (hopefully!)

    @barker: It’s less crowded in Jersey. I’d have to see more from Lin. Right now, he hasn’t shown me much.

  5. barker says:

    this is the roster who do u think will be the best guy from that group for this roster Evans kapono pryzbilla daniels craig smith carney
    PG SG G SF PF F C C UTIL UTIL UTIL BN BN BN BN BN Extra stats along w/ the 9 standard cats – FTM FGM 3 pt % OFF REB DEF REB A/T ratio
    i feel like this league favors big guys which is why this decision is hard show me the light adam
    btw your rankings helped a lot in all my drafts
    also why was arenas not ranked at all??
    1.(12) Deron Williams PG
    2.(25) Al Horford PF,C
    3.(48) Zach Randolph PF,C
    4.(61) Gilbert Arenas PG,SG
    5.(84) Emeka Okafor C
    6.(97) Anthony Morrow SG,SF
    7.(120 D.J. Augustin PG
    8.(133) Tiago Splitter SF,PF,C
    9.(156) Marvin Williams SF,PF
    10.(169) Jeff Teague PG,SG
    11.(192) Udonis Haslem PF,C
    12.(205) Arron Afflalo SG
    13.(228) Ersan Ilyasova SF,PF
    14.(241) Chase Budinger SG,SF
    15.(264) Chuck Hayes PF,C
    16.(277) Jason Williams PG

  6. barker says:

    also so that lin comment means u would have dropped him in a 16 team league for sessions as much as i don’t like sessions
    dont know why someone dropped sessions already

  7. Adam

    Adam says:

    @barker: If you can wait another two weeks for Pryzbilla, I’d grab him. Otherwise Kapono.

    Yeah, until Lin shows me something, Sessions is a better bet.

  8. Jt says:

    At this point, is Anthony Randolph dropable in a shallow 12 league? Even without this injury I was concerned with his minutes. But should I still hang on to him because of his upside?

  9. Adam

    Adam says:

    @Jt: I’d hang onto him until his ankle heals and we see how he’s used in the rotation. There’s often a huge gap between what D’Antoni says and what he does.

    There’s also always the (slim) chance that Randolph goes to Denver and goes bananas there. Unless you absolutely need that 12th spot on your roster, hold tight.

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