The Lakers. The Bucks. Two terrible teams enter. Only one team wins (well, actually neither of these teams are winners, unless you count if they get the first pick in next year’s draft, I guess winning the lottery is something…). Two horrible teams with fast-paced awfulness where we see flashes of fantasy goodness. And we got another taste of the sweet nectar that is Jordan Hill when given playing time! 31 minutes for 28/16/0/1/0 shooting a ridiculous 13-17. With 9 of those boards offensive, Hill was abusing the paint and his shot chart around the rim looked like a rash in Kim Kardashian’s nethers. Everyone that has watched the Lakers lately (a number that has decreased significantly, and would even more without fantasy!) knows Hill should be starting the 4 every night, and it’s taken way too long for D’Antoni to finally go back to him. Even Hill is confused about his playing time based on his profile pic… No Pau Gasol at least for tonight, and Chris Kaman barely arriving on time to last night’s game due to personal reasons might have put a craw in Doh-toni’s gears. There was a report they hadn’t talked in weeks before Tuesday’s game. Before that, Kobe Bryant said he hadn’t talked to D’Antoni in a while during his rant. The Lakers coach is running this team like it’s freshman year of high school. “OMG, like, Mike hasn’t put me in the game, so like, I stopped talking to him and, like just started posting memes on the internet!” I knew it was Kaman! You’re playing with fire, but for guys widely available, if you have a roster spot open Hill is as good as any to give you a really high upside double double tonight. Against the Wolves should be a pretty free flowing game, so let’s all hope Jordan stays over the Hill before we bury Mike D’Anotni underneath it. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball action:
LaMarcus Aldridge – He’s back! And playing monstrous too, going for 25/16/2/1/1. Not gun shy shooting 9-21 and 7-7 FT. Man it’s good to get L.A. back for playoff teams. Feel free to give yourself an L.A. Confidential later this week when you win your way to the finals!
Mo Williams – Mo dimebags, mo problems! 11 assists, and the second time in the past 9 he’s racked up eleven dimes. That said, he’s at 4.5 a game and just lays flat out turduckens every other game. The 5-game week will add em up, but not doing much if he’s not on your squad by now.
Elton Brand – Dude, I so was going to pick him up in RCL, BUT OUT OF MOVES! I prematurely blew my wad on what turned out to be a dry run. No Pero Antic with a kankle, so Brand started and played like he just boned Katy Perry. 11/12/2/1/1. Tomorrow against the Wiz would be a nice looking matchup if Antic is still hobbly.
Jeff Teague – Bounced back from the 19-minute travesty from two nights ago for 22/3/2/1/0 on 10-18 shooting with a trey in 37 minutes last night. While he didn’t pan out the way I had hoped, he at least wasn’t a colossal failure.
James Harden – Triple double. Everyone goes off against the Sixers.
Terrence Jones – 20/7/0/4/2. Everyone goes off against the Sixers.
Chandler Parsons – 16/5/7/2/0. Everyone goes off against the Sixers.
Dwight Howard – 17/13/0/2/3. Everyone goes off against the Sixers.
Jeremy Lin – 13/1/7/0/0. Should’ve been more! Hah! Got you! Patrick Beverley hurt his knee and is getting an MRI today. Uber-scary. Despite only 7:33 from PBev, only 27 minutes for Lin. Which I found a little curious, but this was a blowout so who knows. Regardless, Lin makes for a pretty sexy pickup right now, with a lot of upside should PBev miss extended time. I just saw a single tear drop down Slim’s cheek.
Henry Sims – Back on March 13th, I was pretty bold on Sims: “Worth a spec add in most leagues if you have the room.” Maybe I should’ve painted that on my chest and gone streaking! 18/6/2/1/1 and own him on all my alive teams. Been a fun little run. Mostly because I’m still streaking.
James Anderson – 30 burger! Slim has already scheduled his huge party at Outback for making the REL finals. You’re welcome for Anderson back man! Michael Carter-Williams shoots 2-11, and Anderson 11-18. The hot hand rolls, the 76ers still lose. I think I should get that bumper sticker.
Casper Ware – I don’t know who this is. I think this is his witness protection name. Get it?! He’s see through like a ghost! Cricket cricket. Played 23 minutes and got 10 shots. Made only 2, because, well, when you’re a friendly ghost it’s hard to go up strong. 7/1/2/2/0 and with Tony Wroten uncertain with the sprained ankle, I guess Ware could get some run.
Giannis Antetokounmpo – Sprained his ankle with X-rays negative. He said he never sprained his ankle before. Yogurt-rich diets are good for strong joints – I saw it on Oprah.
Ramon Sessions – Yeah boy! Like Sims, on all my alive teams. 22/3/5/0/0 with a trey and FT% building 11-14. 42 minutes and the Bucks won a game! I think he’s locked in that starting role.
Ersan Ilyasova – That turkey done be basted! Out for the year.
Jeff Adrien – Moves into the starting line-up. 8/9/2/0/2 in 32 minutes isn’t much unlike what he was doing off the bench, but the minutes should be there with a turkey sized hole in the line-up.
Ryan Kelly – Doh-tonied! Only 16 minutes in a cakewalk matchup. 5/4/0/1/0. Why everyone hates the Lakers.
Xavier Henry – Ditto. But he shot like poo and D’Antoni let Nick Young even more of his own poo.
Chris Paul – After a history making, “You just made the wall of shame!”-esque 0-12 shooting game on Tuesday, 9-18 31/4/9/3/0 last night. That’ll do, Paul, that’ll do.
Matt Barnes – Near-rainbow! 12/3/4/3/1 with a TO and near-fight starter. Like it.
Blake Griffin – Womp womp! Couldn’t keep his streak alive of 20+ point games with only 18 Pts. Such a disappointment.
Vince Carter – 23/1/1/0/1 with four treys. His ThrAGNOF is Vinsanity!
Well that wraps it up for the week, may your weekends be strong. As Russell Crowe would say, “Hold the line!” Or, “We need a bigger boat!” Wait, I doubt he says that in this new one… Shoot any comments you have throughout the weekend, and we’ll see ya back on Monday!