The theme this season has been injuries.  If you’ve been able to avoid them then you’re probably sitting real pretty right now as we go into the playoffs/end of the regular season.  However, if you drafted Eric Gordon, Andrew Bogut, Danilo Gallinari, etc. then you’re probably not even reading this post and are looking at fantasy baseball rankings.  The same can now be said for Amar’e Stoudemire owners.  Yesterday’s MRI revealed a bulging disc in his back which will sideline him indefinitely.  Kinda funny those bulging discs.  Not funny that it causes alot of pain, but funny in that it makes me think of anyone suffering with it as a stegosaurus.  I guess you could say a camel, but dinosaurs are a million times more awesome (amirite?!).  Also, thinking of dinosaurs makes me think of T-Rex jokes like this.  If you’re a clever girl , you’ll skip to the Samuel Dalembert or Chandler Parsons blurb and see who to drop him for.  Here’s what else happened last night in the NBA:

Gary Forbes – 21 points, 2 boards and 4 3PM on 50% shooting in 33 minutes.  Yep, Gary Forbes… sounds more like an entrepreneur than a basketball player.  Then again, it IS the Raptors.  He’s come out of nowhere the past couple games to put up some respectable numbers.  To pick him up, you’ve gotta ask yourself a question:  “Do I feel lucky?”  Well, do ya, punk?

Jerryd Bayless – Returned from injury, played 13 minutes, and then promptly left with an injury.  Talk about a quickie.

Tayshaun Prince – If a basketball game is played and no one watches, does it make a box score?  Apparently, it does.  Otherwise, I’d find more useful things to do with my time (haha, just kidding… I don’t do anything useful).  Usually, with bad NBA teams you can find a lot of fantasy gold (see Kings, Sacramento).  Unfortunately, with the Wizards and Pistons you’re left with few solid options (Greg Monroe, Rodney StuckeyJohn Wall, Jordan Crawford, Nene) and then maddeningly inconsistent guys like Prince, Brandon Knight, Ben Gordon (sore groin, DTD), and Roger Mason.  Wow, that was a lot of unimpressive name-dropping.

Gerald Henderson – This Kitten has been purring lately.  Averaging 19/4/3/1 over his last 5, it looks like Henderson has found his groove again so get him in your lineup.  If you’re allergic to cats, then take some Benadryl first.

D.J. Augustin – 2 points, 2 rebounds, 1 assist and 1 steal to go with 0-5 from the field.  This cat would be better used for violin strings.

Gerald Green – 20/4/0/3/1 with 4 3PM filling in for Anthony Morrow.  After the game, Avery Johnson was like “Whoa”.  Then I was like “Whoa”.  Then Keanu Reeves was like “Whoa”.  Then I was like, “Keanu Reeves!  WTF man, I thought you were dead.  Seriously!  You were a multiple choice option at a bar trivia where the other options were dead presidents (Answer was Grover Cleveland, can’t remember the question – Yes, the trivia thing is real!).  I heard you were reviving the Bill & Ted Franchise from 1991 because you can’t get anything else going; that’s awesome man!”  Keanu ran away sobbing.

Alec Burks – Gordon Hayward got the start (24 minutes), but Burks got the minutes (30).  15 points, 5 rebounds and 2 assists on 5-11 shooting while the Jazz blew out the Nets.  Move along.

Carmelo Anthony – Jeremy Lin  sits out to rest his sore knee, Amar’e has stegosauritis, and Anthony goes off (28/12/1/1/1, 12-12 FT).  Just to prove how fickle NYK fans are, Spike Lee lit his Jeremy Lin Harvard Jersey on fire after the game and bought Melo’s jersey right off his back.  There was much rejoicing.  (Note:  Anthony tweaked his groin but played through it)

Baron Davis – Started for Lin and tried to one-up him to gain the starting pg job back.  13 points (3-12 FG, 1-5 from downtown), 5 rebounds, 7 assists, 1 steal, and 9 turnovers.  Your move, Jeremy.

Mike Dunleavy – Single handedly kept the Bucks in the game with his efficient 10-14 FG,  26 points, 5 3PM, 5 rebounds, and 3 assists.  He’s been playing well enough to warrant ownership in most leagues, if you need a 3 point shooter that won’t kill your FG% (48% this season while making 1.5 three’s a game).

Arron Afflalo – 22 points, 3 rebounds, 4 assists, and 2 3PM on 8-12 shooting while coming back from his suspension.  He’s really rounding into form the past month justifying that draft pick you spent on him.  Unless you dropped him in the first half the season when he was completely worthless until Gallo got hurt.  No I’m not bitter, why do you ask?

C.J. Watson – Need help winning your H2H playoff matchup this week?  Pick Watson up and then drop him on Sunday when Derrick Rose comes back.  Four good games out of his last five including 17/1/8/1 with 3 from downtown last night.

George Hill – A very promising 24/3/5 on Saturday, then a vomit inducing 0/1/3/1 in 15 minutes last night.  He’ll be inconsistant down the stretch.

Samuel Dalembert – Not even saying the line, it’s garbage (fine, 2/5/1/0/2).  However, Marcus Camby tore some ligaments in his left wrist.  He says that he will play through it but I’d look for Dalembert to recapture some of his pre-Camby trade stat lines.  Need blocks and boards?  He may be the answer.

Chandler Parsons -16/8/5/2 with 1 3PM.  Will he give you the same consistent boards and points that Amar’e did?  Nope, but he’s been hot lately and will soften the blow (not to mention chipping in a 3 and a steal per game).

Goran DragicThe injuries keep piling up.  Dragic had to leave the game early with an ankle injury and he will be DTD.

Eric Gordon – Your heart jumped a little didn’t it?

Mo Williams – I feel cursed bringing you all this bad news (unless you have none of these players, then you may shower me with praise and assorted stouts).  Williams will be sidelined for a few weeks due to a sprain in his big toe.  Sissy.  Drop him.

Nick Young – May be the primary beneficiary of Williams’ injury (24 minutes, 5-11 FG, 4-8 from 3, 17 points and 1 steal).  That’s not to say the stats will be beneficiary to you (particularly in the FG% department), but he will be a very solid source of 3’s and points from here on out.


    • James Redacted

      James Redacted says:

      @Benny, Ha! I love that site. Tough call since both have been inconsistant. Maggette if you need points, Turner if you need more all around stats.

  1. A Hill O' Beans says:

    Injuries have been unusually cruel this year haven’t they? I drafted E.Gordon, Bogut, Verajao. I traded for Lowry and Billups, both got injured within 2 weeks of my acquiring them.

    Anyways, Lowry is droppable at this point, right?

    Thankfully I happened to pick up Dragic just when Lowry went down… hopefully Dragic isn’t going to miss any games because I’m running out of replacements.

    • James Redacted

      James Redacted says:

      @A Hill O’ Beans, Yikes that’s rough… way to stick it out though. Yea I think you gotta cut Lowry at this point. You need guys who will produce now.

      • A Hill O Beans says:

        @James Redacted, Yeah it doesn’t get any better for my team. Felton is off for personal reasons, Derozan is out, and now Gasol may have to sit for 5 days! Ouch!

  2. Sarah Palin Rice says:

    Who do u like better for the rest of the season in a standard scoring league, Parsons or Turkoglu?

    • James Redacted

      James Redacted says:

      @Sarah Palin Rice, Parsons.

  3. None of my friends are a big of a dork as me, but I have to tell the world about my new friend Mike Dunleavy

    I spent 2 hours doing my fantasy lineup this week only to freak out at the last second and drop Faried to pickup Mike Dunleavy. I then pulled Ariza plopped Dunleavy in and went to bed. 5 minutes before the deadline. All Monday morning I had a feeling of remorse. Dunleavy? Fucking Dunleavy? Why did I do that. I’m in 3rd place, I’m better than Dunleavy.

    It’s now only Tuesday but Dunleavy has a game and a half of ridiculous lines. Anyone in front of him in the depth chart in any position seems to be getting injured (Delfino, Ilyasova, etc) and I’m killing it.

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