This is my intro, walk up, get hyped, and official theme song of SON Enterprises. I’m so pumped that a millions words are about to be written. Since it is Thanksgiving, I want to give thanks to Grey for giving me the opportunity to write about hoops. I especially give thanks to those who read my stuff and actually laugh at the jokes, but the real MVPs are those who ask questions AFTER reading the whole post! With that said….We back, baby!!! It’s been a crazy year for fantasy hoops, as the season ended abruptly last year and the turnaround for this upcoming season is about as quick as a sexy time session with the wife. You know what wasn’t quick? Doing all the projections for the upcoming season. It is said that pimpin’ ain’t easy. Well, compared to doing projections, pimpin’ is child’s play. Alright, before I begin, the yearly public service annoucement:

THESE RANKINGS MUST BE UTILIZED IN THE CONTEXT OF YOUR LEAGUE SETTINGS, TEAM ROSTER CONSTRUCTION, AVERAGE DRAFT POSITION, AND PERSONAL PHILOSOPHIES.

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It’s baaaaaaaaack. I know the wait was excrutiating. The eye fatigue from those countless hours staring into the digital dojo. The clicks. Oh, the millions of clicks on the mouse button that turned you into a one-armed Popeye. What was it all for?…  What was it all for?…What was it all for?….

The chance to be the best of the best of course!

I’ve been told that the RCLs are populated with some of the sharpest fantasy basketball minds in the land. Do you have what it takes?

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Imagine finding out your crush actually liked B.O. Nasty, but hey…everyone has their thing. If you didn’t shower for weeks and asked him/her out, would that guarantee anything? Of course not, but it would put you in a better position for success. That’s what this post will be. Another piece of information to help you solve the fantasy puzzle. 

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Football has the Scott Fish Bowl and Razzbowl. Shoutout to Scott Fish, Donkey Teeth, and BDon. Baseball has TGFBI and the Razzslam. Shoutout to Justin Mason and Donkey Teeth. Again? Does this guy ever sleep? These tournaments are amazing because they allow readers and fans to compete with the titans in the industry, while bringing their respective communites closer. Now, fantasy basketball has a similar tournament: The RazzJam.

The tournament will be played on the NFC (National Fantasy Championship) website, where the best high stakes leagues are run for all the major sports. The general format will be: slow draft, 8-cat, and roto, replicating the NFBKC Draft Champions format. I will provide the exact details and particulars at a later date, but as of now, I am just gathering worthy participants.

There will be multiple leagues with an overall champion being crowned at the end. Kumite! Kumite! Obviously, the more participants, the better, so fill out the form below:

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With the NBA Board of Governors approving the 22-team plan to finish the 2019-2020 season, fantasy basketball leagues will not be able to conclude theirs. As a result, it’s a sad, sad day in Sonville, as I enjoy writing and shooting the shit with many of you. At least we get hoops back. Anyways, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for making Razzball Hoops a community of extraordinary magnitude. See you guys and hopefully girls when we start prepping to dominate next season!

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After Rudy Gobert of the Utah Jazz tested positive for COVID-19, Adam Silver sprung into action last night and suspended the remainder of the season. For those hoping for a return of games this year, that’s a highly unlikely outcome. First, scheduling would be a nightmare as many of the venues have been booked with other events, but the most important aspect is liability. Imagine if the NBA resumes the season and someone gets the virus. It could be a fan, a worker, a media person, or a player. The lawsuits would be crippling. So, just start prepping for football because MLB is next, right? Anyways, for fantasy, I have no idea how sites are going to handle this situation. There’s no way they can crown a champion so basically it would be a lost season and entry fees would be held for next year’s contests? That’s my best guess. As soon as I hear or read something, I’ll post it. As for this kind of situation happening in the past, the 1994 MLB season did not crown a champion because the players went on strike. 

Here’s what else I was writing last night until Woj dropped the bombshell. I won’t delete so you can have some shits and giggles.

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This is Terry Rozier’s fifth season in the NBA. These are the field goal percentage numbers from the prior four seasons: 38%, 39%, 36%, and 27% his rookie year. No wonder he was nicknamed Scary Terry. Those are some awful numbers that give me the heebie jeebies. I won’t be able to sleep for a week, as I hear the echoes of bricks clanging off the rim in my sleep. I once watched Event Horizon on shrooms. That pales in comparison to the dread I have of sleeping now from Scary Terry. With that said, entering this season, we all knew what drafting Rozier entailed, but the brave were willing to overlook the nightmares for counting stats galore, as he would be the alpha in Charlotte with Kemba Walker gone. Last night, those with the iron balls were rewarded, as Rozier wasn’t scary, he was legendary. Beep. Boop. Bop. You know what’s always legendary? The Stocktonator.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
40 4 3 1 0 1 8/13 15/26 2/3

A career-high! Granted, the opposition was the no-defense-playing Atlanta Hawks, and the game went to not one, but two overtimes, but whatever. A 40-burger is a 40-burger no matter how it’s cooked. There have been brutal stretches for Rozier this season, which have put many of his owners on tilt, just itching to drop him, but he’s a top 80 player for fantasy on the season! The field goal percentage is 41%. A terrible number for most, but heavenly for Rozier. The usage has been only 23, as Devonte’ Graham came out of nowhere this season, but Rozier has provided points, tres, boards, dimes, and steals with low turnovers and excellent free throw percentage.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

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