LOGIN

When Bob Geldof gathered dozens of European musicians together to sing Do They Know It’s Christmas? in the mid-’80s, he did it presumably because of the famine rampant in Ethiopia. I say presumably, because it’s possible Geldof just assumed all Ethiopians were atheists and would have no reason to know that it is the birthday of someone who they don’t even believe exists. Geldof was stream of conscious like that, recording multimillion dollar singles of things he wondered to himself in the shower. Do They Know It’s Christmas? followed by Why Would You Stop To Tie Your Shoe Right In Front Of the Escalator Exit?, followed by Who Thinks Coconut Is A Good Flavor? Think of all the classic songs we wouldn’t have had if Google existed in 1984. Anyway, the draw to the original Christmas fundraiser was to get superduper stars together, united toward a movement. When a bunch of big names all share one experience, it makes the event more noteworthy.

You’ll pardon me if I’m not totally unconvinced (double negative!) that Geldof didn’t have something to do with the last week of fantasy basketball, or the Maul-a-day Season, as it were. Listen to the all-star lineup amassed on the IR this week: John Wall and Andray Blatche missed a game and were listed as day-to-day, which has since turned into day-six-day. Shortly afterward, Stephen Curry, Jose Calderon and Chauncey Billups all went down with minor injuries that were supposed to keep them out of the lineup a day or two (that was three to seven days ago). Wednesday, the news of Joakim Noah‘s 10-week injury rippled around fantasy leagues. Followed briskly by the news that Yao Ming‘s season and probably his career are over. Like the Oden injury in November, this means more for your March team or your 2011 team than it does for your team today. By now, you’ve moved past Yao. He wasn’t hurting you then, he likely won’t hurt you now. Rajon Rondo, on the other hand – that’s going to hurt you. He’s out a week or three, with only Nate Robinson to fill the void. Maybe 4/5 of the void, as Sugar Nate doesn’t cover much space … or the guy he’s assigned to defend. There’s not much you can do with this Yao news that you haven’t already done (except mourn the loss of a fun player to watch), but with all these fallen guards, you should be able to cover a bit of your losses with Rondo. There’s Ty Lawson, Reggie Williams, Jerryd Bayless, and Robinson in that order. And perhaps Goran Dragic‘s worth a stash too. Word ’round the campfire is Steve Nash‘s groin has been giving him fits. ’tis the season. Somebody better let him know it’s dis-miss time!

Here’s how the rest of Thursday went in fantasy basketball:

Trevor Booker – 11/9 in 31 minutes. He was cold from the floor and hot from the stripe. December JaVale is jealous of this line.

JaVale McGee – 2/5 last night. 10/8 this month. See? Jealous.

Devin Harris – Shot 28 percent from the floor, but made up for it by sinking all but three of his 17 free throws. It’s worth mentioning that both Harris’ percentages are way up this season. Up enough that a .280 shooting night doesn’t change anything.

Jordan Farmar – Farmar is averagign 22 more minutes, 8 more points and 3.5 more assists as a starter than as a reserve, but doesn’t look as comfortable as a SG as he does running the point. Probably for the same reason I don’t look as comfortable running in pumps as I do running in Pumps.™

Tim Duncan – 28/16/4 in 33 minutes. That’s about 14 points a half, seven points a quarter, 0.8 points a minute or .013 points a second. He easily leads the league in per second scoring. Disprove it!

Ty Lawson – 15/7. When he realizes he’s faster than whoever is guarding him, he’ll score 20+ a game, easy.

Glen Davis – Tied his season-high in points (18) on his way to the second double-double of the year. After the game he e-mailed Shaq a LOLcatz image that said, “I can has all your double-doubles?” Shaq immediately found Davis’ girlfriend and slept with her.

Kevin Garnett – Three double-doubles in a row, seven in his last 10. There are just certain players I won’t ever want to own. Channing Frye, Marcus Camby, and Garnett are some of those players. I must be prejudice against gangly arms.

Jeff Teague – 18/4/3 with  trio of steals. He was so happy that he lost his head and tried to high five Garnett. We’ll have to hear confirmation, but I’m pretty sure Jeff Teague is dead.

Marvin Williams – 26/5/1 with four tovs. I kinda thought this is what Marv was going to do every game with Joe Johnson out.

Josh Smith – 0-for-8, finished with one point in 34 minutes. Oh. Wait … what?