We’ve run through the fantasy basketball rankings for each position – well, you ran through them. I sprinted for a bit, started feeling woozy, then threw up all over my slacks. I don’t know why I wore slacks to a sprint, but I made sure to wear bicycling shorts to today’s 2011 fantasy basketball top 100. … I’m sorry. I was just informed I am wearing John Stockton’s game worn shorts, not bike underoos. My mistake. On so many levels. Anyway, feel free to click the link at the top of this paragraph or shift your eyes to the menu bar above this post and click there. Whichever. Like all these here rankings, the top 100 is organized using a hybrid of roto and H2H leagues. Let’s get it on! Here’s your top 100 for fantasy basketball:
1. Kevin Durant – If you need this pick explained to you, go ahead and stop chasing the white rabbit, because you ain’t never getting out of Wonderland.
Season Projections: .470/.880/2 3pt/29 pts/6 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2.5 tov
2. LeBron James – Villain schmillain. General Patton wasn’t any fun to go to movies with either. Didn’t stop anyone from wanting to go into war with him leading the way.
Season Projections: .515/.755/1 3ptm/25 pts/7 rbd/7 ast/1.5 stl/1 blk/3 tov
3. Chris Paul – He’ll either be playing alongside three all-stars this season or alone on an emaciated squad full of scrubs doing three all-stars-worth of work.
Season Projections: .480/.860/1 3ptm/18 pts/4 rbd/9.5 ast/2.5 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
4. Derrick Rose – Malik, Jalen and McGowan are soooo jealous of Derrick’s rank.
Season Projections: .460/.850/1 3ptm/24 pts/4 rbd/8 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/3 tov
5. Dirk Nowitzki – Say goodbye to the top five after this season, Dirk. It happens to the best of us. Also, it happened to three of your teammates, Jason, Vince and Shawn.
Season Projections: .475/.885/1 3ptm/22.5 pts/7 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2 tov
6. Pau Gasol – A brief conversation with my lady about the defunct Hornets-Rockets-Lakers trade: MY LADY: “So was there a big trade today?” ME: “Huge. L.A. traded its best player, Pau, for New Orleans’ best player, Chris Paul.” MY LADY: So where do the Rockets fit in?” ME: “They threw in some players and will get Pau Gasol, who they might use to replace a guy they lost last year named Yao.” MY LADY: “Yao Gasol?” ME:” No, Pau Gasol.” MY LADY: “Right. Chris Pau for Yao Gasol. So where do the Hornets come in?” ME: “There is no Yao. The Hornets have Chris Paul.” MY LADY: Ooo, Chris Paul. I thought you were saying “pow.” / Adam slams Sprite can on the ottoman out of frustration.
Season Projections: .510/.830/0 3ptm/23 pts/10.5 rbd/3.5 ast/0.5 stl/1 blk/2.5 tov
7. Dwyane Wade – Sweet pick-up. What’s even sweeter: now you don’t have to bother with shooting guards until it’s at least Marco Belinelli time! (My buddy Justin bet me I couldn’t rationally fit Belinelli into the top 10 without mentioning Chris Paul. My buddy Justin is not a smart man.)
Season Projections: .485/.765/0.5 3pt/26 pts/6 rbd/5 ast/1.5 stl/1 blk/3 tov
8. Stephen Curry – Admit it, you’re still not sold on Stephen Curry being a top 10 guy and you’re fighting the temptation to just pick Kobe Bryant. Keep fighting it. If you’re one of the last picks in a snake draft, Bean will still be there on the way back.
Season Projections: .470/.895/2 3ptm/21 pts/4 rbd/7 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/3 tov
9. Deron Williams – You gonna argue the high ranking of a TURKISH LEGEND!?! No. I didn’t think you would.
Season Projections: .475/.800/1 3ptm/19 pts/4 rbd/10.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/3 tov
10. Kevin Love – You know that five spot I said Dirk was likely vacating after this season? This guy has already filled it on a lot of lists. I’m a bit more frugal. I take things slow. I waited nine years after we were married before I kissed my wife for the first time.
Season Projections: .475/.845/1 3pt/19 pts/14 rbd/3 ast/0.5 stl/0 blk/2 tov
11. Carmelo Anthony – I find myself wondering quite often if Carmelo Anthony ever thinks about Allen Iverson . Even just for a minute.
Season Projections: .455/.835/1.5 3ptm/25.5 pts/7 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
12. Kobe Bryant – When the Lockout was at its darkest and it looked all but certain that this season would pass us by, the cries that this was Bryant’s last good season were almost as shrill as Mila Kunis’ voice. A part of me wants y’all to chill on the “Kobe’s almost done” talk, another part of me knows that if his last good day isn’t today, it will be tomorrow. And yet, another part of me just wants a Hot Pocket.
Season Projections: .450/.825/1 3ptm/25 pts/4.5 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0 blk/3.5 tov
13. Dwight Howard – Howard shot .718 from inside five feet last season. He also dunked the ball 227 times as compared to NJ’s 269 as a team. I’m not explaining this to you, as much as I’m explaining it to the guy reading this over your shoulder who doesn’t understand why the Nets would offer up Brook Lopez for a guy whose head is three sizes too tiny for his shoulders.
Season Projections: .575/.593/0 3pt/20.5 pts/14 rbd/1.5 ast/1.5 stl/2.5 blk/3.5 tov
14. Blake Griffin – It gives me armpit sweat thinking he’s only a sophomore/junior (depending on how you define the start of his pro career).
Season Projections: .495/.670/0 3ptm/25 pts/11.5 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
15. Russell Westbrook – Word up, Russ. Things going well this offseason? Definitely, definitely. Excited for your fourth season? Definitely, definitely. Well, that’s great.
Season Projections: .440/.829/0.5 3ptm/21 pts/4 rbd/9 ast/2 stl/0.5 blk/4 tov
16. Amar’e Stoudemire – Here’s where you should take pause: Stoudemire hasn’t been on a team this talented since the height of the Nash/Marion/Johnson Suns teams. With a guy like Amar’e, I tend to think he works better among great players instead of being the alpha male. I know HE doesn’t think that, but I do. When he’s alone, his stats are like your devlish good looks – enjoy ‘em now, ’cause it’s only a matter of time before everything starts drooping.
Season Projections: .515/.795/0 3pt/24 pts/8 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1 blk/3 tov
17. Al Horford – I think this Atlanta Hawks nucleus has seen its best days (and frankly, those days weren’t all that spectacular). Crawford, Johnson and Smith are all down-trending and unless this team is going to totally fall off the map, I think Horford and, to a lesser extent, Teague, are to be the ones to slow its roll.
Season Projections: .545/.777/0 3pt/16.5 pts/10 rbd/3.5 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2 tov
18. Rudy Gay – I think it’s about time Rudy Gay replace Sonny Weems in the NBA’s Sweetass Blues Band Revue®. Taj Gibson is down, but Wayne Ellington is being a total dick about it.
Season Projections: .460/.775/1 3pt/19.5 pts/6 rbd/3 ast/1.5 stl/1 blk/2 tov
19. Monta Ellis – Monta Illest has led the league in mpg and total minutes in each of the last two seasons. Knowing Monta (which I do not, at all) he’ll try to surpass both minute marks this season despite there being 16 fewer games. I don’t think he’ll succeed. He’ll give us just a tad under what he gave us last year. Well, gave you, maybe. He didn’t give me nothing, ’cause I was too busy drafting Stupid Joe Johnson (™).
Season Projections: .445/.770/1 3ptm/24.5 pts/3.5 rbd/5 ast/2 stl/0 blk/3.5 tov
20. Danny Granger – Granger’s the poster boy for three underwhelming games followed by one monster game to even out the averages. That poster is worse than anything with Katherine Heigl on it.
Season Projections: .445/.850/2 3pt/22 pts/5.5 rbd/2.5 ast/1.5 stl/1 blk/2 tov
21. LaMarcus Aldridge – Pat yourself on the back, young fella. You just got yourself Aldridge 21 picks into the draft. I’m right proud of you!
Season Projections: .495/.775/0 3pt/21 pts/8.5 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2 tov
22. John Wall – Wall’s been practicing on that jumper all summer (and fall). They say practice makes perfect. I’d settle for practice makes 46 percent.
Season Projections: .440/.770/0.5 3pt/19.5 pts/4.5 rbd/8 ast/1 stl/1 blk/3 tov
23. Al Jefferson – I’d be interested to know what percentage of drafts LMA and Jefferson are taken within five picks of one another, I bet it’s more than 60 percent. I can say that because there’s no way for anyone to check me.
Season Projections: .495/.710/0 3pt/19.5 pts/10 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1.5 blk/2 tov
24. David Lee – Lee’s still one of the best PF in the league. But he only managed to play 73 games last season, fewer than 20 of which he was all that healthy for; so he took his lumps. Being elite doesn’t stop anyone from having to perform … actually, that’s not even close to true. The biggest perk of being elite is not having to perform. This list is ruined.
Season Projections: .529/.784/0 3pt/19 pts/11.5 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
25. Josh Smith – Smoove needs to stay a) motivated and b) away from the three-point line when he shoots the ball. He does that, he could be a value pick at 25. Hopefully he doesn’t read this and assume I’m daring him to shoot farther away from the basket than the three-point line. Oh, crap. I really wish I hadn’t rubber cemented the delete key. Now that mistake will just have to ride.
Season Projections: .488/.699/0.5 3pt/16.5 pts/8 rbd/3.5 ast/1.5 stl/1.5 blk/2.5 tov
26. Tyreke Evans – I haven’t been this hopeful for a foot and ankle to hold up since my ballet recital at fifth grade fat camp.
Season Projections: .449/.779/0.5 3pt/19.5 pts/5.5 rbd/6.5 ast/1.5 stl/0.5 blk/3 tov
27. Steve Nash – Remember when People magazine debuted and Hank Aaron became baseball’s home run king? Steve Nash does. That’s a problem.
Season Projections: .480/.935/1 3pt/14.5 pts/3 rbd/10 ast/0.5 stl/0 blk/3.5 tov
28. Brook Lopez – He’s the worst rebounding center in the league. He grabbed 10 percent of the available rebounds while he was on the court. But Adam, advanced statistics are more complicated than the lyrics to any song by the Decemberists. How bad is that 10 percent? Well, compare that to Kevin Love’s league-best 23.6 percent.
Season Projections: .505/.800/0 3pt/22.5 pts/7 rbd/2 ast/0.5 stl/1.5 blk/2.5 tov
29. Kevin Martin – He annually feels like a player who belongs somewhere in the fifth or sixth round because of his injuries. He also annually has stretches where he plays like a top 10 guy. No. 29 feels appropriate.
Season Projections: .430/.910/2 3pt/22.5 pts/3.5 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2 tov
30. Gerald Wallace – 29-years-old, no longer the team’s best offensive option and has been rumored to be on his way to Orlando so the Nets can have Dwight Howard. What happened, Crash? You used to inspire magic. Now you just might have to settle for being on its roster.
Season Projections: .470/.759/0.5 3pt/15.5 pts/7.5 rbd/2.5 ast/1.5 stl/1 blk/2.5 tov
31. Rajon Rondo – Rondo is so much better at real basketball than fake basketball. He’s your little brother’s version of Jason Kidd.
Season Projections: .515/.600/0 3ptm/12 pts/5 rbd/10.5 ast/2.5 stl/0 blk/3 tov
32. Zach Randolph – Lionel Hollins on the first day of open camp, “Hey is Zach here yet?” Yeah, boss. He got here a couple minutes ago. “How’d he look? Did he get fat? Tell me he didn’t get fat.” No, boss. He looks good. In shape. “Don’t lie to me, son. I’ve been afraid of this moment since July 1.” No, boss. He looks good. Have you seen Kendrick Perkins? “No. Did he get fatter?”
Season Projections: .485/.770/0 3pt/20 pts/11.5 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
33. Manu Ginobili – When healthy, he’s a great asset. But you’ve got to factor in his past health issues and you gotta factor in his age. That’s what’s called Manufactoring. It’s a troubled industry here in the States.
Season Projections: .455/.859/1.5 3pt/18 pts/5 rbd/5 ast/1.5 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
34. Chris Bosh – Chris Bosh is a great player who had a down season, took his lumps, put on some muscle, stayed right in the offseason and will improve on his 2010 performance. Chris Bosh paid me $425K to write that.
Season Projections: .505/.812/0 3pt/19.5 pts/8 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
35. Andre Iguodala – Last year represented the beginning of Iguodala 3.0, in which he becomes a defensive entity with a little offense instead of the team leader. Live it. Love it. Leave it alone.
Season Projections: .469/.714/0.5 3pt/14.5 pts/6 rbd/6 ast/1.5 stl/1.5 blk/2 tov
36. Paul Pierce – You know what you’re getting with Pierce. It’s like going to a Jessica Biel movie. It’s not going to change your life or anything, but you didn’t choose it for that. You chose it for a chance to see Pierce in his underwear. Or, you know, whatever.
Season Projections: .470/.840/1.5 3pt/19 pts/5.5 rbd/3.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/3 tov
37. Eric Gordon – Improved a ton last season, but also missed 26 games (46 missed games in his last two seasons) and defenses never got a hold of him because they were busy adjusting to Griffin and their rotating cavalcade of point guards. I think Gordon is legit, but not without a little settling down this season.
Season Projections: .470/.810/1.5 3pt/20 pts/2.5 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
38. Jrue Holiday – Most Improved Player, 2011-12? Most Improved Player, 2011-12.
Season Projections: .460/.815/1 3pt/18 pts/3.5 rbd/7.5 ast/2 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
39. Nene Hilario – Solid all-around center. That said, I don’t trust anyone who names himself Nene and then insists everyone refer to him only as that. That man ain’t right.
Season Projections: .590/.715/0 3pt/15 pts/8 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2 tov
40. Arron Afflalo – This will almost certainly be Spellcheck’s best statistical season yet, but just know that he’s not a huge scorer and 15 points is about as good as it gets.
Season Projections: .460/.830/1.5 3pt/15 pts/4 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/1.5 tov
41. Joe Johnson – There’s going to be some fantasy team out there with David Lee, George Hill and Johnson and it’s going to be the guys-with-names-that-sound-like-they-came-out-of-the-Witness-Protection-Program team.
Season Projections: .450/.810/1 3pt/17 pts/4 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2 tov
42. Tony Parker – I know you don’t like Tony Parker this high. But you can’t count on Manu all year. Duncan is, like, 60-something years old, and Richard Jefferson did not turn into someone who is good at basketball over the long break. Yet, if I asked you whether you believed the Spurs would make the playoffs, you’d almost certainly say, “yes!” So you tell me … who gets San Antonio to the playoffs?
Season Projections: .494/.777/0 3pt/19.5 pts/3.5 rbd/5.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/3 tov
43. Joakim Noah – If his recent production trend continues, expect his value to continue arcing upward next season. Who’s arc? I think you see where I’m headed.
Season Projections: .519/.711/0 3pt/13 pts/12.5 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/1.5 blk/2.5 tov
44. Paul Millsap – “Utah: home of the unending streak of big men who get in my way despite not being anywhere as good as me.” – embroidered message on Paul Millsap’s pillow
Season Projections: .522/.733/0 3pt/18 pts/8 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2 tov
45. David West – Well, I’ll say this for him. He’s good enough to replace Tyler Hansbrough. So he’s got that going for him.
Season Projections: .471/.829/0 3pt/18 pts/8 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
46. Ty Lawson – The Denver Nuggets: Where no one will average 17+ points a game. Things are gonna get REAL interesting up in the thin air region.
Season Projections: .490/.790/1 3pt/15.5 pts/3.5 rbd/7 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
47. Andrew Bynum – Let’s ask J.J. Hickson and LeBron James how much new Laker coach Mike Brown helps develops the youngsters.
Season Projections: .550/.700/0 3pt/13.5 pts/8.5 rbd/2 ast/0.5 stl/2.5 blk/2.5 tov
48. Dorell Wright – I been thinkin’ about my Dorell / When you gonna pick it!?! / When you gonna pick it!?! (My apologies to Jack White.)
Season Projections: .420/.780/2 3pt/15.5 pts/5.5 rbd/3 ast/1.5 stl/0.5 blk/1.5 tov
49. Carlos Boozer – Ugh. I just have no idea about Boozer this season. He could be a top 30 guy, or he could totally flop. Sticking him at 49 seemed like just enough of an anonymous spot so that no one would remember if I really mess this one up.
Season Projections: .515/.718/0 3pt/18 pts/9 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
50. Brandon Jennings – This is the highest I’ve ever ranked Jennings. It feels kooky. But imagine Maggette gone, and Stephen Jackson in his place. Now imagine Beno Udrih motivating Jennings not to mess up and lose his job. Now imagine a healthy Bogut. Okay, now picture a winged horse. Now picture Jennings on that horse eating a taco. I know, right!
Season Projections: .422/.795/1.5 3pt/15 pts/4 rbd/6.5 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
51. Roy Hibbert – Much was made last offseason about his weightloss, but dude looked soft. Not doughy-soft; he looked weak-soft. Dr. Hibbert made minor increases to his stats, but there’s still trouble in Circle City. That starts with T and rhymes with P and that stands for per36. As in, they should get better this season and if they don’t, I’m done with him.
Season Projections: .465/.770/0 3pt/12 pts/8 rbd/3.5 ast/0.5 stl/2 blk/2.5 tov
52. Devin Harris – Hate it or love it, his game don’t stop. Envy him.
Season Projections: .456/.824/1 3pt/17 pts/3 rbd/6.5 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/3 tov
53. Luol Deng – Improved scoring, almost 40 minutes a game, almost in the 1 stl+1 blk+1 3pt club, and yet … meh.
Season Projections: .455/.770/1 3pt/16.5 pts/6 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/1.5 tov
54. JaVale McGee – “He finally gets it.” – teammate Andray Blatche on December 12. I guess I don’t need to add anything here. Blatche has spoken!
Season Projections: .519/.605/0 3pt/12 pts/8 rbd/1 ast/1 stl/3 blk/2 tov
55. Andrew Bogut – I haven’t been this excited about an Aussie bendin’ the ol’ elbow since I went on that three-day drinking bender with Olivia Newton-John! My god that woman can toss down shots of rye.
Season Projections: .530/.561/0 3pt/13 pts/10.5 rbd/2 ast/0.5 stl/2.5 blk/2 tov
56. Serge Ibaka – Sometimes, when I’m feeling way too confident and satisfied with my basketball bloggin’, I just flip back to last year’s top 200 list and let the reminder that I ranked Ibaka 199th wash right over me.
Season Projections: .530/.740/0 3pt/12 pts/9 rbd/0.5 ast/0.5 stl/3.5 blk/1 tov
57. Andrea Bargnani – I honestly can’t see ever owning Bargnani with the six players surrounding this guy on either side. I just know I won’t opt to pick him unless all the others were taken first. So why not knock him down a few more slots? Because I don’t want you to accuse me of defaming the Italians.
Season Projections: .465/.825/1.5 3pt/20 pts/5.5 rbd/2 ast/0.5 stl/1 blk/2 tov
58. Lamar Odom – And to think, Derrick Caracter is going to miss the first month of the season for L.A.. Boy, the Lakers must really be kicking themselves NOW!
Season Projections: .500/.660/1 3pt/15.5 pts/9 rbd/3.5 ast/1 stl/1 blk/2.5 tov
59. Luis Scola – My biggest problem is his blocks. If you have someone like Dwyane Wade, Derrick Rose, Tyreke Evans or any other guard that rates well above-average in blocks, Scola would make a good pairing with them.
Season Projections: .522/.730/0 3pt/18 pts/8 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
60. Greg Monroe – Is a sleeper still a sleeper if everyone and their hairdresser has him ranked in the top 60?
Season Projections: .555/.701/0 3pt/13 pts/9 rbd/2.5 ast/1.5 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
61. Marc Gasol – GAS HOLE! (Come hell or highwater pants, this guy’s getting a new nickname.)
Season Projections: .514/.721/0 3pt/12.5 pts/7.5 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/1.5 blk/2.5 tov
62. Darren Collison – Remember how jazzed you all were a year ago about how huge DarCo was going to become? Then how disappointed you were in his second season? Great. Now go compare Mike Conley and D.J. Augustin’s third seasons to their second ones and get excited about Collison all over again.
Season Projections: .470/.875/0.5 3pt/15.5 pts/3.5 rbd/7.5 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
64. D.J. Augustin – Let’s just hope D.J.’s desire to improve trumps his frustration from having to do it in Charlotte.
Season Projections: .435/.910/1.5 3pt/16 pts/3 rbd/7 ast/0.5 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
65. Raymond Felton – Wanna see into Felton’s future? Look at Andre Miller’s recent past.
Season Projections: .440/.800/1 3pt/13 pts/3.5 rbd/6.5 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/3 tov
66. Kyle Lowry – I won’t own Kyle in any leagues this year because a lot of fantasy owners confuse surprise production last year with huge upside this year. You watch.
Season Projections: .435/.805/1 3pt/14.5 pts/4 rbd/6.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2 tov
67. DeMar DeRozan – Biggest PPG leap from 2009 to 2010, but he shot a fair FG% in over 34 mpg. Realistically, he won’t improve much past that.
Season Projections: .475/.819/0 3pt/20 pts/3.5 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
68. Michael Beasley – The Wolves, like Sofia Vergara, are just too stacked in the frontcourt not to get in its own way. Beasley was certainly the second option on offense last season, as I believe he will be this season, but there weren’t too many viable options last season. This season? I mean, hello! J.J. Barea!
Season Projection: .461/.775/0.5 3pt/17.5 pts/5.5 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
69. Marcin Gortat – As I said earlier in this post, my delete button is glued and broken. That’s a shame because I can honestly see this guy producing top 40 numbers by season’s end. I’m cool with him here, but he’s also the player (aside from Boozer) I’m least confident about having ranked properly.
Season Projections: .545/.700/0 3pt/16 pts/11 rbd/1 ast/0.5 stl/1.5 blk/1.5 tov
70. Mike Conley – Conley’s become somewhat forgotten amid the hubbub of other guards. That’s a mistake. Fair warning. Unfair warning: yelling “Fore!” a second after your ball dents the roof of a nearby group’s golf cart.
Season Projections: .454/.750/1 3pt/14.5 pts/3.5 rbd/6.5 ast/2 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
71. J.J. Hickson – Hickson’s SICK, son™. Go ahead and put in a 5,000 t-shirt order on that one.
Season Projections: .490/.719/0 3pt/17 pts/9.5 rbd/1.5 ast/0.5 stl/1 blk/2.5 tov
72. Marcus Thornton – Averaged 36 mpg/16/3/3 in the final seven games of the season. It’s a small sample size, but like all small things, I’m making do with it as best I can. I worry about Sacramento’s desire to make Jimmer Fredette a starter, however.
Season Projections: .440/.795/2 3pt/18 pts/5 rbd/2 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
73. Jason Kidd – Kidd is just slowly dwindling. His minutes, his scoring, his efficiency. He’s 38, he’ll be 39 in March; this is to be expected. His assists are the slowest to dropoff. Watching him last year, it was clear he’s playing only to facilitate the other four players on the court. Nothing else. In the fantasy world, that’s about as useful as having grapes for nipples.
Season Projections: .400/.849/1.5 3pt/8 pts/4 rbd/7.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
74. Stephen Jackson – I dare you to listen to Staggolee by Pacific Gas & Electric while Stack Jack is on the floor and tell me it doesn’t pop into your head every time you watch him from now on.
Season Projections: .440/.805/1 3ptm/17.5 pts/4 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov
75. Omri Casspi – Oh, here’s where I left my single Cavs representative from this top 100 list. I wondered where he went.
Season Projections: .445/.700/1.5 3pt/14 pts/6 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
76. Ray Allen – Rajon Rondo’s per36 assist number drop from 11.4 to 8.0 when Ray Allen was not in the game. So there you are. STATS!
Season Projections: .485/.900/2 3pt/15 pts/3.5 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/1.5 tov
77. Wesley Matthews – He’s Jason Terry with better percentages and no peanut head.
Season Projections: .470/.890/2 3pt/15.5 pts/3 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0 blk/1.5 tov
78. Jason Terry – He’s Wesley Matthews, if WesMatt was jet-propelled by the glory of God. (I’m ranking Matthews first because God is cool and all, but I’m really allergic to peanuts, y’all.)
Season Projections: .455/.870/2 3pt/15.5 pts/2 rbd/3.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/1.5 tov
79. Jared Dudley – I’m not even sure how deep of a sleeper he’ll be come draft day. He went widely unnoticed in most leagues in the final 20 games of the season. It’s hard to tell if that will carry over to this one. He averaged 26 mpg, 11/4/1, with 2.4 stl+3ptm last season, which is okay. Upon closer inspection, Dudley Do-Right did pretty damn right in his 15 games as a starter, averaging 34 mpg, 16/6/2, with 3.2 stl+3ptm. With Vince Carter gone and Mickael Pietrus generally underwhelming, this looks to be the uproarious, and drunken shenanigan-filled year of Dudley’s more!
Season Projections: .475/.765/1.5 3pt/14 pts/4 rbd/2 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/1 tov
80. Kevin Garnett – KG could very well exceed his output last season. It wouldn’t shock me (that’s what forks and wall sockets are for!). It also wouldn’t shock me if things went bleak for any of the older players who have had a significantly longer vacation than they are used to having.
Season Projections: .500/.850/0 3pt/14.5 pts/7.5 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/1 blk/1.5 tov
81. Jason Richardson – Wait, the Magic re-signed him!? Why? For HOW much!?! WHY!?!
Season Projections: .445/.750/2 3pt/13.5 pts/3 rbd/3.5 ast/1 stl/0 blk/1.5 tov
82. DeMarcus Cousins – He’s still gonna foul a lot this year, mostly because he defends outside shooters with the quickness of someone running on ice wearing high heels. That liability on D stands to affect his O.
Season Projections: .430/.670/0 3pt/17.5 pts/10.5 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/1 blk/3.5 tov
83. Danilo Gallinari – The good news is that The Rooster will have every chance to be this team’s scoring leader and I expect him to make good (sort of). The bad news is that there’s no other news.
Season Projections: .425/.885/2 3pt/16.5 pts/6 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
84. Tim Duncan – The projections below are Duncan’s floor. So there’s that. I also think we’re absolutely going to see his floor this season. So there’s that also.
Season Projections: .485/.720/0 3pt/13 pts/8 rbd/2.5 ast/0.5 stl/1.5 blk/2 tov
85. Nicolas Batum – Didn’t take a huge leap forward, in fact, he went backward. I expect his output to match his minutes a little more this season. Assuming he gets minutes, which is not an assumption I would make about most of the Trailblazers’ lineup.
Season Projections: .470/.830/1.5 3pt/14 pts/5 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1 blk/1.5 tov
86. Elton Brand – He could be as good as any PF in the league this season, but would you bet on it?
Season Projections: .510/.740/0 3pt/15.5 pts/8 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1.5 blk/1.5 tov
87. Toney Douglas – He’s the Bizarro Derek Fisher: he’s the exact opposite of a Western Conference thinker whose body limits his physical ability. Douglas is an East coast Charlie Hustle who makes a ton of bonehead errors per 36 (BHEP36™).
Season Projections: .430/.780/2 3pt/15 pts/4.5 rbd/5.5 ast/1.5 stl/0 blk/2 tov
88. Channing Frye – You could go with Blatche. Blatche is the Frye you get if you’re too cool for three-point field-goals. But if you follow Razzball, you’re probably not too cool for anything. So Frye is the Blatche you get if Blatche is still available and you’d rather not draft Blatche. Frye averaged almost six three-point attempts per game and sank 39 percent of them. The season before, he shot 44 percent from the arc on one fewer attempt. Look for a teensy regression on both attempts and percentage. Look for it, but not forward to it.
Season Projections: .450/.825/2 3pt/13.5 pts/7 rbd/1.5 ast/0.5 stl/1 blk/1 tov
89. Andray Blatche – All reports suggest that Blatche is an unpleasant guy to be around. Makes sense, he’ll be 25 this season. Name a 25-year-old who is pleasant to be around. No, I’d prefer to focus on his upside. He averaged 17/8/2 with more than two stl+blk per game. No one’s grabbing him until at least the eighth round. Production anywhere near that is something on which you’ll take and ask for free refills.
Season Projections: .460/.750/0 3pt/15 pts/7 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/1 blk/1 tov
90. Corey Maggette – “The Bobcats intend to make Maggette the central focus of its offense this season.” *shudder*
Season Projections: .455/.830/0 3pt/18 pts/6 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
91. Tyson Chandler – Here’s to hoping a bloated contract translates to bloated statistics. *clink* (It won’t.)
Season Projections: .610/.715/0 3pt/9.5 pts/9.5 rbd/0.5 ast/0.5 stl/1 blk/1.5 tov
92. Kris Humphries – Drop him two rounds if he’s trying to rebound next to Dwight instead of Brook.
Season Projections: .505/.690/0 3pt/9.5 pts/9.5 rbd/1 ast/0.5 stl/1 blk/1 tov
93. Chauncey Billups – (NOTE: This projection assumes Billups will be playing backup to Chis Paul for the Clippers. If that holds true throughout the entire season, I’d be surprised.) At what point do we get a reality show that follows Billups around while he bitches about spending the twilight of his career effected by younger, better players demanding trades to New York? Call it “Changes for Chauncey.”
Season Projections: .429/.925/1 3pt/12 pts/2.5 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2.5 tov
94. George Hill – He was slightly overrated last year, then he pooped the bed. Now that he’s underrated, you’ve got to swoop in. Poop = swoop.
Season Projections: .455/.870/1 3pt/13 pts/3 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/0 blk/1.5 tov
95. Thaddeus Young – Every year that he’s a sixth man, I’m going to assume he’ll be “this year’s Sixth Man.”
Season Projections: .505/.730/0.5 3pt/14.5 pts/5.5 rbd/1.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/1.5 tov
96. Jordan Crawford – The are four Wizards in the top 100. RUN ON WIZARDS! (not overheard at a Magic: the Gathering gathering … for once!)
Season Projections: .440/.800/1 3pt/15 pts/3 rbd/3 ast/1 stl/0 blk/2 tov
97. Gerald Henderson – Averaged 35 minutes and a 16/5/4 line in the last eight games of the season. Without Gerald Wallace in the lineup, he averaged 13/4/2. Playing time alone should make this range a solid bet for the 24-year-old.
Season Projections: .445/.760/0 3pt/14 pts/5 rbd/2.5 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/1.5 tov
98. C.J. Miles – He’s a SF who played SG about 40 percent of the time last year. I expect the reverse to be true in 2011 and for Utah to go with a big lineup a lot more. It’s really his only hope for a breakthrough season.
Season Projections: .420/.785/1.5 3pt/13.5 pts/3 rbd/2 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/1.5 tov
99. Hedo Turkoglu – I’m 71.7 percent positive whatever I say here will be null and void come Christmas Day. So consider this the thing I said. I dare you to argue that I didn’t say this or that I was wrong for having said it. #treated.
Season Projections: .440/.700/1.5 3pt/12 pts/4 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2 tov
100. Boris Diaw – Third Frenchman! I’ve clearly made multiple mistakes on this list. Ah well. No turnin’ back now …
Season Projections: .485/. 710/1 3pt/11.5 pts/6 rbd/4 ast/1 stl/0.5 blk/2.5 tov