If you’re a loyal reader, you know my weekly calendar consists of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Rondae. Unfortunately, Rondae Hollis-Jefferson has been out six games due to injury and wasn’t the model of consistency when he did play. Of all the things in this world that you want consistency from, the calendar has to be top 3, right? The other two would have to be the effort played on defense by the squad you root for and the lack of lag when streaming something online. The All-Star game is scheduled for Sunday, February 18th. What if the calendar shows it to be on Monday one day then Friday the next? With the proliferation of digital calendars, I forsee this to be a huge problem in the future.  Address me as futurist Son from now on. Anyways, the way Andre Drummond has been playing recently, everday should be called Dre Day. Last night, he went:

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 17 27 2 3 2 1 0 5/17 7/10

He’s had eight straight double-dubs, with two of those being 20/20 and one 30/20. Outside of downtowners and free throws, Dre has literally stuffed the stat sheet, as there has not been one bagel in any category. Borderline top 5 player over the past eight games. Everyday is Dre Day.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Most are familiar with chapter 3, verse 16 of the Gospel of John: For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son <Hey! That’s me!!!>, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. Before storm clouds gather up above and lightning fries my plump physique into a mush of cooking oil, I was just joking God. Ha ha. I’m probably fine because I’m sure he/she/it was overloaded yesterday, but….out of respect and….juuuuust in case. Anyways, because we go next level here at Razzball, I want to mention chapter 3, verses 18-19 of the Gospel of John: Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. <Hey! It’s me again!!!!> This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Yesterday, the fervent followers and believers of the NBA were graced with a sermon from the Book of John Henson, chapter 3, verses 18-19.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
19 18 3 0 2 0 0 8/14 3/5

Granted, it was against the Brooklyn Nets, a team that is atrocious against the center position. With that said, since Jason Kidd was fired as coach of the Bucks (seven games), Henson has averaged 29.4 minutes, 12 points, 7.57 boards, 2.42 dimes, 0.8 steals, and 1.1 blocks. As long as the Bucks do not trade for a center at the deadline, have faith in the Henson. Is it any coincidence that I am Son and John is a Henson? I thinks not. See the light and come out of the darkness. If the Bucks trade for DeAndre Jordan or any other big man, then you can tear the Book of Henson out, get on your knees, and scream to the heavens: Why have you forsaken me?

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The MPAA (Motion Picture Association of America) film rating system has undergone numerous changes over the years. In 1968, there was G (general audiences), M (mature audiences), R (restricted), and X (under 16 not admitted). After a few years, the ages for R and X were raised from 16 to 17 years old. Then, a GP (parental guidance suggested) was added. That was subsequently changed to PG. Then PG-13 was added because of complaints about violence in certain PG movies. X was then changed to NC-17. Ai yai yai! My freaking head hurts. You know what wasn’t confusing? The performance from Paul George, aka PG-13, last night.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 43 5 5 2 0 1 5/8 19/26 0

A 40-burger on 73% shooting without one free throw attempt! Simply amazing. Anyways, since coming to OKC, the rebounds and assists are down, but the 3.1 3s on 7.4 attempts and 2.2 steals are career-highs! Don’t get hurt and looking forward to seeing you in Los Angeles next year, Paul. LA. Hollywood. MPAA. PG-13. It just fits too well.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m a dualistic kind of guy. Two sides to every coin. Can’t make lemonade without lemon and water. Takes two to tango. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. A stick has two ends. I guess I’m the king of cliches and idioms now. Anyways, when I think of “firsts,” a gamut of emotions and experiences fill my mind and body. There have been many firsts that were excellent. First kiss was amazing. First dunk was exhilirating. I don’t give a shit that it was only with a volleyball. First banana cream pie from Apple Pie was orgasmic. As we all know, not all firsts are memorable. First speeding ticket. First accident. Doesn’t have to be of the driving variety. First time shitting the pants. Well, Terry Rozier had a bunch of firsts last night. First career start. And…..

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 17 11 10 2 2 2 3/6 6/14 2/4

First time messing around. You know what that calls for….

Rozier got the start because Kyrie Irving sat due to injury. In addition, Marcus Smart was unavailable, so Rozier ended up playing 33 minutes. This is obviously an outlier game but….Per 36, Rozier is scoring 14.1 points, grabbing 6.8 rebounds, dishing out 3.3 dimes, and stealing 1.6. Just remember for the future if a similar situation arises. I’ll never forget my first kiss. I’ll never forget the day Rozier got his first start and messed around.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last week (in which case I’m interested to know how you manage), you have heard the news about the Blake Griffin trade. For those aforementioned people who don’t, here is the summary:

Clippers get: Tobias Harris, Avery Bradley, a first round pick, a second round pick and the always charming Boban Marjanovic

Pistons get: Blake Griffin along with his portable clinic, Willie Reed and Brice Johnson

I would love to read your thoughts down in the comments about who won the trade. My first instinct was that it all depends on Blake’s health and on how well he will mesh with Andre Drummond. Another conclusion that can be derived from the trade is that loyalty is dead in the NBA. Remember all the efforts the Clippers made to convince Blake to re-sign, which included filling the court with his photos and even raising an actual banner with his name into the rafters as a sign of their future devotion??

As always, let’s take a quick look at last week’s suggestions and how they performed. The Spurs duo of Dejounte Murray and Kyle Anderson were not very impressive, but their minutes are safe and will only improve moving forward. Murray is even averaging an absurd 8.6 rebounds in the last eight games. The Sacramento duo of Bogdan Bogdanovic and Buddy Hield, on the other hand, were not so hot as only one of them is having a good game each night. At least the Kings are sticking to their veteran-resting plan for now… Finally, Ersan Ilyasova’s minutes continue to trend in the wrong direction, but you can still get some value if you trade him right now…

Moving on to the new suggestions, this will be a heavy “Buy” week as injuries and the aforementioned trade have created opportunities for more players to become fantasy relevant.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Bullshitting is bad. Or is it? There are four reasons why people lie. 1) To hide or protect something. Good if you were harboring a Jew in Nazi Germany. Bad if you have a mistress. 2) Fear. Of getting caught. I guess that ties into protecting oneself. 3) To elevate one’s self-perception. You went to which school? You’re how tall? You slept with how many women? 4) It is the wise thing to do. Do I look fat in these jeans? BS’ing is often annoying or straight up lame, but it is an integral part of life. There are many situations in which being brutally honest serves no purpose other than to hurt the other person, which is lame. Damn it, is everything in life lame then? Last night, we had another example of BS’ing being bad….the good bad, though….as in dope. Now that I think about it, sometimes we just BS to mess around, which is what Ben Simmons did last night against the Bulls. Ironic, huh?

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 19 17 14 0 2 6 0 6/15 7/10

Simmons has now messed around five times on the season. He had been in a slump lately, looking disinterested and lacking aggression. It’s mindblowing to think that he can dominate a game without being able to shoot from the perimeter. He’s that good. Anyways, BS is a nightly triple-dub threat and will contribute with the D stats. As we established above, there’s good and bad with BS. The bad? Literally no 3s, like he hasn’t made one the entire year. The turnovers are plentiful. As I always say, good if you are high in a pastry shop. Not so good for fantasy. The free throw shooting is abysmal, like 55% bad. DeAndre Jordan, with his 60% on the year, is like, “Yo, Ben. You really need to practice bro.” Simmons is the 75th player for fantasy on the year. For the last month? The 110th. There are just too many holes in his game to approach Top 50 territory, but for punt FT% and 3 teams, BS is lovely.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

All units. All units. Be advised. We have reports of a 187 at 7000 Coliseum Way. Subject is armed and considered dangerous. Over. 

Lou Williams is a bad, bad man. No Blake. No Milos. No Rivers. No problemo.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 50 2 7 0 0 4 8/16 16/27 10/10
Armed with but a jump shot, Lou single-handedly took down the Warriors, 125-106 in Oakland. Five-Oh. You know what sound that is. Now, he played 35 minutes and had a 39.4 usage rate last night. Here was the rest of the Clippers starting lineup: Jawun Evans, CJ Williams, Wesley Johnson, and DeAndre Jordan. That usage rate seems a little light to me. Obviously, Lou isn’t going to bring out the men in blue every night and Lou will transition back to the bench when the team gets healthy. Regardless, he’s a professional scorer of buckets and will flourish in any capacity. It wouldn’t surprise me if the men in blue make a few more appearances before the end of the season.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

What’s up Razzballers? We’re back with another edition of Any Given Saturday. Speaking of being back, professional basketball player Steph Curry returned after missing 11 games with his ankle injury and went nuts in a win over the Grizzlies. Steph went for a cool 38/4/3 on 13-for-17 FG (10-for-13 3P, 2-for-2 FT) and nary a turnover. All this in only 25 minutes. What a monster. Anyway, here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Santa Claus is known by the names of Saint Nicholas or Kris Kringle. Rajon Rondo is known by the names of Johnny, Swag, and The Yoga Instructor (nicknames courtesy of Basketball Reference). Claus’ height and weight are classified. Rondo is 6′ 1″ 186 pounds. Claus moves around via reindeer-drawn sled. Rondo uses his own two legs to run around the court. Claus is a global icon. Rondo could be if he hired the right marketing agency. Claus and Rondo are different on so many levels, but both are some of the most generous entities that man has ever known. Claus gives gifts to children that are well-behaved and coal to the bad children. Has anyone ever figured out why Claus is so freaking generous? Like, what’s his motivation? We are taught not to accept candy from strangers, especially those that stick their heads out from a windowless van. And for good reason. The candy is the bait to lure us in. And Claus? Anyways, regardless of motivation, Claus is a generous dude. Rondo is also generous. He dishes out dimes that enable his teammates to score buckets easier. In fact, he is so generous that he had dished out 6,216 dimes, good for 31st on the all-time list, before the start of last night’s game.

PTS REB AST STL BLK TOV 3PT FG FT
 2 7 25 1 0 3 0/1 1/5 0

Make that 6,241 dimes, good for 30th on the all-time assist list. The 25 assist game was the ninth-best of all time! Scott Skiles, of all people, holds the record with a 30 assist game. Go figure. Rondo is not going to contribute much outside of assists and rebounds, but the dimes will definitely be plentiful. As for Claus vs Rondo, the edge has to go to Claus, as he has no rival and always seems to deliver. Rondo has his off nights.

Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?