Razzball Nation! Hopefully you’re hopping over here to boast your hardware. To flaunt your gold. To show us all your bigger red ass to display your dominance over us weakling chimps! Most H2H leagues wrapped up last night, and I had a brutal year. Multi-titles last year, not a one this time out. But hey! It’s been a fun season, and we’ve still got a few weeks left for other H2Hers and Roto players. So we’ll be here! And we’ve got a fun championship edition week coming at ya, with Slim’s REL acceptance speech along with Wednesday’s RCL Championship crowning. Speaking of crowning, somebody get Aaron Brooks the iron throne (I thought about making a birthing joke instead, but that’s gross)! Dude has been owning Westeros (I think that’s right, it’s hard to keep up with all the kingdoms when you haven’t read the books!), getting his second straight 40+ minute outing and blowing up for 24/8/15/3/0. As I mentioned in the comments at some point last week, Brooks against the Rockets with no Patrick Beverley checking him was going to be saucy. Then Ty Lawson had to sit on top of it! Wow, that sentence comes off weird as a standalone… Brooks looks to be an immediate add with Brian Shaw quoted that he’s not rushing Lawson back. As well he shouldn’t, captain obvious! Try and snatch up Brooks if you still can and ride him while Lawson sits on it, apparently. Hah! Here’s what else I saw over the weekend:
Anthony Davis – The Brow is playing with no Back. He’s an invertebrate! Had to get treatment during the game, and now health is starting to scare me a bit with my assumed #3 ranking I’m giving him next year… 15/5 with 4 blocks, yeah the swats are nice, but that’s like a Robin Lopez line!
Trey Burke – Career high dimebag! 24/4/15 hitting a couple of treys. Trey with treys! He’ll be a tough guy to rank; I had him really high before his broken hand cut his preseason time and I sunk him. Will have some interesting upside next year.
Draymond Green – #OccupyDraymondGreen! Whilst he occupies all the cats! 11/4/1/1/1 with a trey shooting 5-6. Put up a rainbow Friday night of 10/10/4/2/2. Start a Twitter revolution!
LaMarcus Aldridge – Will he be a first rounder next year? I think he probably has to be, with a big 25/18/4/0/4 again last night. No Escape from L.A.!
P.J. Tucker – P.J. ain’t no project! One of the most efficient rainbows you’ll ever see, going 22/7/3/2/2 shooting 7-9 with four treys. What a sendoff game for Slim’s REL team! Slim, are you going to shave now that you have the title?
Gerald Green – 24/2/0/0/0 with five treys. “Oh my god, his ThrAGNOF is like, so big!”
Tony Parker – Getting an MRI for a back that is MIA. He’s old, walks with a cane, of course his back is thrown out. No way he plays the next few Spurs games, I’d say probably streamable if you’re in the final week of a H2H championship.
James Johnson – Led the Grizz in minutes. “Why do they only play me in futile blowouts!?” 20/5/3/0/0. Remember the uphill fights I had saying JJ’s minutes would keep him from staying relevant all year? No doubting there’s something there though if he could start somewhere!
Evan Fournier – The Virgin is back! 26/4/4 with six treys in 39 bench minutes. The shot are a-flyin’ against the Rox! Well, not so much for Randy Foye, who I think I was right to call overrated all year.
Omer Asik – Tried to go rainbow! Wtf?! 18/23/1/3/3 almost getting a Goromotaro as well. Implausible! Oddly enough, shot 6-11 both from the field and the stripe. If only Dwight Howard had never signed… Now Asik’s fantasy owners and Lakers fans have something in common!
Paul George – 6 steals. But past that, 18/7/2 with only one trey, shooting 6-17 and only 5-9 FT. Not the way to end most fantasy owners’ seasons! Is PG a first-rounder next year? I highly doubt it, ten points for JB!
Roy Hibbert – Negative points for Hibbert! And for the Pacers as a whole… 23 points in the first half?! Then apparently Hibbert was “late out of the locker room” after the half. I knew I shouldn’t have had that burrito! Led to him getting benched and only playing 9 minutes of 0-5 FG ball with no stats and a TO. We called him a drop weeks ago, so hopefully this one didn’t sting ya!
Jordan Hill – Did what you’d hope! 22/9/0/2/0 shooting 10-14. FG% boss! All that in only 29 minutes. Huzzah efficiency! And pigtails…
Nick Young – 2-11 from deep. Lordy. And you wonder why they keep getting blown out…
Blake Griffin – Able to play through various ailments for 23/7/5/3/0. Been a huge year and able to stay mostly healthy. “He’s mostly healthy at night… Mostly…”
Carmelo Anthony – Caught Nick Young-itis. 4-17. Labradoodles everywhere!
J.R. Smith – Like playing against someone in NBA 2K14 who just hits circle as soon as they cross the half court line. 32/5/3/2/0 and did hit 10 treys, but 11-28. I guess that’s not “that bad”, but it’s more ball hoggish than an obese man at an all you can eat Rocky Mountain oyster buffet.
Sorry a bit of a shorter post today, but my mammoth baseball piece that will be out this afternoon ate my soul. So hop over to baseball later today if you’re looking to talk some pitchers! Enjoy the NCAA Final tonight and be sure to set your lineups on your remaining active teams tomorrow!