I know, I know this is way too early to make any calls regarding players, but I’m going to anyway.  After watching the last two days of games, here are some premature 8-cat bold calls for the 2015-2016 season:

Nikola Mirotic
He’s had two very impressive games and is now averaging 18.5 pts/3.5 threes/9 rebounds/1 assist/1.5 steals/0.5 blocks on 52% from the field & 100% from the line on 4 attempts a game.

This is a very hot start and for roto leagues is absolutely fantasy gold. He opens up the Bulls offense and it’s clear that 30 minutes is within reach. It looks like everything is breaking right for Mirotic with Joakim Noah already injured.  A top 30 finish is within sight.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Flashy player.  Ridiculous opportunity.  Buzzy preseason.  A lot of times it ends up fizzling out, sometimes it works out OK, and one time it’s C.J. McCollum.

C.J. went absolutely bonkers in his 15-16 debut, hitting 14-22 from the field including 6-9 3PTM for 37/6/1/1/0 and no TO.  Video game numbers!  So he’s a shooter, and he does what NBA shooters do – keeps draining em when they hot!  But I think we need to take a step back and consider a few things:  Other than massive Pts and treys it was fairly empty.  This was against the Pelicans, who without Brow, might look worse than the Sixers; they look horrific.  And the third thing that no one seemed to mention while anointing McCollum the next big thing in combo guards this preseason – he’s got a pretty extensive injury history.  He’s at the pinnacle of a sell high for me.  Do I think he’ll be hot garbage all the sudden?  Of course not.  But do I think he scores 37 again this year?  I don’t.  Well, unless they faced the Pelicans every night…  I’d shop around in the 40-50 range of ADP and see if you can get lucky.  As with all fantasy takeaways off one game, it’s always good to keep from overreacting.  Compared to fantasy football, we’re at the same point as about 9 minutes into the first quarter of week 1.  Still a long way to go.  Here’s what else went down during the first full slate of fantasy basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Pearls don’t lie on the seashore. If you want one, you must dive for it.

(Yep, I just dropped a Chinese proverb, so y’all know this article is about to go next level…)

I’ve always found it fun to read – and write – some of the more unconventional or against-the-grain prognostications for the upcoming fantasy basketball season, and it can be a gas to revisit them at various points throughout the year to see if they’re gaining any traction or skidding wildly off the road. It probably goes without saying, but the bolder (see: nuttier) the prediction, the less likely it is to bear fruit. So the intent here is to provide an unpopular – but not unrealistic – take on a player that may actually help you during your fantasy draft. You’re likely to disagree with most (they’d be the consensus if you didn’t) but if I can hit on one akin to last year’s “take a late-round swing at Rudy Gobert and hold him until starter minutes come available,” it can be a season defining gamble. So pick your favorite(s) and let’s go diving for pearls together! (Man, that is without a doubt the least cool analogy I’ve ever come up with. But it’s a call-back to the opening line which I thought was kinda clever, so I’m gonna own it.)

Prepare the hot takes cannon as we fire off 30 bold fantasy basketball predictions (one for each NBA team) for the 2015/2016 season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Mmmmmmm, is there anything saucier in fantasy basketball than a rookie fresh from a great Summer League tearing up preseason?!  Obviously Ricky Rubio‘s haircut is the only thing saucier to me!

After Stanley Johnson posted some crazy stats in Vegas (16.2 PTS 1.8 STL 1.0 BLK), StanVan has given his prodigal son StanJo a ton of run in preseason and the rook has taken off with multi-3PTM games in his first 3, a rainbow line last Thursday against BKN (12/7/2/2/2) and frequently getting to the stripe.  Unfortunately he’s cooled off a tad the past two games with a little bit of a dud last night, and he’s in a pretty robust rotation of SG and SF, mainly with the much more boring Marcus Morris playing solid this preseason as well.  But even at likely a bench role to start the year, Johnson can play anywhere from the 1-to-4, as he’s already played some out-of-position PG this preseason.  In the last update to my Top 200 ranks, I moved StanJo to 94th for the rainbow line upside.  I’m not going too crazy for the rookie nookie, but he’s certainly worth a look around 100 in the 9th round.  If only he had a twin like Morris – but also named Stanley – then we could have dueling StanJos in the NBA!  Here’s what else has gone on through the past week of preseason:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Jump Ball A Matty Series PNG

Previous “Jump Ball” articles:

9/19 – Russell Westbrook v Damian Lillard

9/26 – Kawhi Leonard v Jimmy Butler

10/2 – Blake Griffin v Serge Ibaka


Minnesota Timberwolves Team Utah Jazz
SG, SF Position (Y! Eligibility) SG, SF
2014 Results
T-87th 9-Cat Rank (Total Value) T-29th
T-130th 9-Cat Rank (Per Game) T-36th
82 Games Played 76
36.2 Minutes Per Game 34.4
21.1 (T-101st) Usage Rate (Rank) 25.4 (T-32nd)
Please, blog, may I have some more?

Yeah. It goes like this right here. It’s the return of the writings of Slim! That reminds of an Outkast song, and that song reminds me of 1998. If you don’t remember it was the year we learned there was yet another way to be disgusted by a cigar. That near, far, wherever you are you probably found yourself at some point rooting for the most unlikeliest of protagonists, Billy Zane. And of course it was the year the ‘Blue Screen of Death‘ truly became a meme, long before anyone knew what a meme was.

Gangstaaaaa… It’s the return… turn…

In the NBA draft that year there were 3 guys drafted that are still playing and should one day be in the Hall of Fame. I’ll give you a hint, the top 3 draft picks were Michael Olowokandi, Mike Bibby, and Raef LaFrentz, and if you were playing fantasy basketball back then you might have gone all-in on one of them. Give up? They are Vince Carter, Dirk Nowitzki, and Paul Pierce. Pick number 5, 9, and 10 respectively. That’s not to say great players aren’t drafted 1st, but the only thing guaranteed when you are first overall is a whole boat load of money. Something about the use of the word ‘only’ there doesn’t quite feel right.

Return… Ganstuhuhuh… It’s the re…

It seems so easy to see when you’re talking time traveling, something mind unraveling. Get Down. It’s a whole lot harder to do here and now using some funky combination of math, logic, illogical fandom, a random number generator, and of course the occasional dart throw. For some reason though, after about an hour on 350 (or about 176c) it develops a creamy caramel colored crust. Once it cools, just cut it up and consume. So here’s you’re 1st taste. Slim’s, I can’t believe I’m writing this in 3rd person, RCL playoff schedule post.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

rcl-basketball-logoThe NBA fantasy draft season is upon us! With plenty of terrible early projections going on, early drafts are always fun.  This is basically going to be a recap of my first RCL draft of the season, with a little of bit of sleeper info thrown in for good measure.  I really love the team I got in this league, even though I was sniped on a few picks.  Just FYI I’ll be setting up another RCL league in about a week or so – to draft in October – so I hope some more of you guys join me!  By then Yahoo’s rankings should be much closer to the ballpark of reason… At any rate, let’s dive in!

Please, blog, may I have some more?


I’m going to pull an Infinite Jest here…  Literary jokes!  2015-16 will now be known as “The Year of the Point Guard Hoarding”.

Man it was unreal finally drafting a real team, and not having an awful mock draft with uneducated click-happy idiots or autodrafting based off of Yahoo’s pre-ranks…  Shizz got intense!  The PG run got so hot-n-heavy that I had to go to my warm-and-fuzzy Rubio just to feel safe…

To feel the immense pressure of the PG run, or the frustration of sleepers two-to-three pages down from the top available slipping through your fingers right before your pick, start up a Razzball Commenter League today!  We need more commissioners, more leagues, we need more mmmmk!  Had a little Mr. Mackey happen right there…  If you’ve thought about starting a new league with good competition, or have a few friends trying to start a new league and need the best fantasy basketball community to fill it out, start an RCL league today and join the fun.  100% free, great competition, and solid prizes – mainly me making an ass of myself on Youtube…

Anyway, I feel pretty good about this first RCL team I drafted, mainly by scoring a randomized top-3 pick and netting an ideal PG/C combo to start my draft.  But that damn PG run got me caught up, and I don’t love my bigs…  Here’s how the draft went last night, and my pick-by-pick analysis below:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ah, the late-round fliers!  Which I think is “fliers”.  A lot of the time, I almost write it “flyers”.  Zach LaVine is a late round flyer!  Eesh, being a married man makes you start getting reallllll corny with the jokes.

So as I’ve mentioned a few times getting through the top 100 (Rank 1-10 | Rank 11-20 | Rank 21-50 | Rank 51-75 | Rank 76-100), there just isn’t many warm bodies out there to call “JB’s late sleepers”.  And, well, a lot of that is because I have guys that are ranked in the 100s on Yahoo and ESPN in my mid-rounds (cough, Jordan Clarkson – ESPN 99 Yahoo 144, what the hey?! aherm, cough cough – I’ve caught the plague!), while just as much is the lack of sexy rookies in good situations.  Jahlil Okafor is awful for fantasy.  D’Angelo Russell loves talking 401ks with Josh Smith by the turnovers at the breakfast buffet.  Stanley Johnson looks awesome, but Detroit has a bigger wing mix than Bdubs.  Asian zing – that one my jam!

With these final rounds of players, it’s also important to factor in league size.  These ranks are [hoping to tailor] for a 12-team league, so I’ll reach for a tad more upside the later we go than go for stability.  Tristan Thompson is going to be mad consistent for some points and boards for the very deep leagues, but lordy he’ll be unownable in a 12er.  You’re fired!  Can’t believe this Trump stuff is still going on…  Anyway, here’s the Top 150 for the 2015-16 Fantasy Basketball Season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Mid-rounds – when it starts getting tricky!  And when personal biases and a soft spot for Latin Lovers can creep into your thoughts and dreams!

You don’t have to look far to see that I covet upside youth as early as the 20s, with a few gut calls that could make or break my 15-16.  As long as MCW isn’t in there!  One thing I’ve found over last year is there seems to be pretty good talent and upside through the mid-40s, so as long as everyone in your league isn’t going for a FT punt, you should be able to get through 3-4 rounds with your desired build and a few fitting options each pick.  Enough wankery, we want ranks already! Here’s the Top 50 for the 2015-16 Fantasy Basketball Season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?