Well, here we are fantasy baskethoopers (<– my mentally ill uncle’s term, often sputtered out in between foul-language rants about the garbage man); the final day of your fantasy basketball season (unless you’re in a playoff format in which you did not make the finals.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yeah, you caught me. You didn’t believe it because there aren’t any grizzly bears in Memphis. Look how smart you are! ESPN readers would have tweeted the headline without thinking. Now if the headline read “Gilbert Arenas Fights Grizzly Bear In Vancouver” then you totally would have believed it.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I spent some time away from the computer yesterday. I needed a little me time, a little time for Josh to be Josh. So I got my favorite sandwich from Subway. Curled up by the fire with a glass of wine and my favorite John Grisham novel.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Monta Ellis played 32 minutes. The rest was spent nursing his broke-ass face that became broke after Anderson Varejao elbowed it into a million pieces. It was heinous. I puked a little. Babies were crying in the distance. Grandma said a prayer.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Mike Miller is set to to make his season debut with the Heat today, which is particularly fortuitous (if I may use that term on a family blog) as the news makes the rounds of Dwyane Wade likely missing more games has resulted in thousands of monkey-punches to the groins of thousands of fantasy basketball teams.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The fact that Ricky Rubio still isn’t the starting point guard of the Minnesota Timberwolves is only batshizz crazy until you dump water over your head and remind yourself that this is the Minnesota squadron that couldn’t find a regular spot in the starting rotation for Kevin Love in his first two seasons, despite him never having a PER under 18 at any point during that time.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Delonte West started in place of Rajon Rondo‘s nagging pinky injury. Or is it pinkie? Does it matter? You know what I mean either way. I could have typed “pinkee” and you would have accepted it. But that’s poor spelling and you ought not let me get away with lazy writing.Please, blog, may I have some more?
LeBron James set the season’s scoring bar at 51 points against the Orlando Magic last night. And while he also grabbed 11 boards and doled out eight assists, I refuse to be impressed until he also makes balloon animals for the kids at halftime.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Evan Turner – There are whispers that even after Iguodala returns from injury tonight that Turner will remain at the “two.” Clean cup, clean cup, move down, move down! The weirdest part of those whispers is that they all came from Doug Collins who had several microphones at his disposal.Please, blog, may I have some more?
New Jersey’s Troy Murphy started not only the first game of the season Wednesday, but also his first as a Net. I know to you and me that sounds like bad news, but apparently he was really looking forward to it.Please, blog, may I have some more?