With the full 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Rankings now complete, let’s take a look at the top 50. Through the top 20, we’ve already had 6 PGs taken off the board, but your third round is going to be more littered with 1s than Neo’s kung-fu program! If you don’t have a PG through your first three rounds, you may as well turn into Brendan Fraser and live for 30 years with your dad Christopher Walken. Or just scream in your draft lobby chat “WILLLLSSSOONNNNNN!” …because you’ve been left behind, not because you’re drafting Wilson Chandler… “It’s not funny if you have to explain your joke, JB!” Fine! Probably the biggest change from the Way too Early Ranks is the catastrophic Isaiah Thomas falloff moving to Phoenix. While he’s not in the top 50, I still think he’ll be a value. More on that later! Here’s my top 50 for the 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Season (based on 9-cat H2H):Please, blog, may I have some more?
As we head into August, now is a perfect time to take a look back at the free agency period for the upcoming 2014-15 NBA season.
While there is one big name yet to sign (Eric Bledsoe), a few less-intriguing options still on the market (Michael Beasley, Andray Blatche, Kent Bazemore, Jordan Crawford), and another who’s unsure whether he’ll play or retire (Ray Allen), most of the fantasy basketball world knows where guys will be playing this season. Of course, that still doesn’t include the possibility of Kevin Love finding a new home by the end of the summer, but that could be the subject of an entirely different article.
There is little doubt in anyone’s mind that Love will land in Cleveland, which will make them a huge force in the Eastern Conference — and in the entire NBA.Please, blog, may I have some more?
We all know the story. Cleveland fans burn things, then stage apology videos. Yeah, let’s put the ashes from last night’s barbecue and put it on top of my LeBron James Cavs jersey and pick it up. Sooooooooooo symbolic. Somebody is already halfway through the 30 for 30 special… But I got an advanced look at LeBron’s first press event with Cavs owner Dan Gilbert:
I love what Slim said in his reaction as a Heat fan. “LeBron’s legacy will now be that of a journeyman.” BURN! Poor choice of the all caps scathing word, JB! LeBron is still the alpha dog of the NBA, but he’s now numero tres in my ranking-os… Never was too good at Spanish. I’m moving Anthony Davis up to 2 and joining Slim’s bandwagon. Even though BronBron had talent around him in Miami, he never had a point guard. Which I mean more literally than not since Mario Chalmers‘ assists look more like Billy Dee Williams’ Dancing with the Stars‘ scores than an NBA PG’s! And now LeBron’s got family on his team! I don’t mean the city of Cleveland, but Uncle Drew! They should mish mash one of those videos with drunk uncle from SNL… Anyway, Kyrie Irving is going to have some balls in his hands (cough), so LeBron will be performing less hernia tests. Kyrie’s three-year arc has been declining FG% but steadily improving Ast/TO ratios and overall dimes. More efficient with the ball, but not hitting the shots. Maybe it’s because the Cavs had no other playmakers… Iso for Anderson Varejao! Dion Waiters just blocked me on Twitter. LeBron will be a huge ease on Kyrie’s defensive pressure, however stemming from that – if Kyrie is hot, he shootin’! Both will have great final numbers, but a little inconsistent game-to-game. LeBron should see his dimes go down a tick as well. Here’s a look at the rest of the free agency movement and some key notes from Summer League:Please, blog, may I have some more?
More rankings, more “hindsight is 20-20″-ing! Damn man, seeing LaMarcus Aldridge carve up the Rockets after his huge season is bumming me out – even before I hop into reviewing 21-50! Get the red marker ready Slim! Get that F ready!
Just like we reviewed in the Top 20, rankings are based on my final updated top 200, comparing them to the FantasyPros aggregate Draft Day Rankings along with Basketball Monster’s Total Value for 9-cat leagues on the season. Slim busts out his grading pens and reviews for grammatical correctness and how stringently I followed the assignment. “What if I stay after class for tutoring!?” This dialogue and mental image is starting to sound like a low-rent porno. It’s not like that! Here’s a look back at the Top 50 for the 2013-14 Fantasy Basketball Season:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Hmmmm, ok, who did you pick in you office “who scores 40 points tonight” pool? I bet the Vegas odds were… a million to one on Nick Young. “So you’re saying there’s a chance!” Too bad Nick Young sucks in fantasy. You actually have to go back 15 games to find him putting up a 5 in any counting stat other than treys. The ThrAGNOF fairy strikes again! Dude went a preposterous 15-26 (6-13 3PTM 4-5 FT) 40/4/1/2/0 and only had one turnover last night. The Blazers should be ashamed. I’m pretty sure this game never actually happened, and it was some sort of elaborate April Fool’s joke. Swaggy P shockingly led the Lakers in minutes off the bench, and with his shoot first, ask questions later attitude, Mike D’Anotni’s rape stache kept curling upwards in facial hair glee. By the end of the game (and yes, another Lakers loss), D’Anotni’s mustache looked like Rollie Fingers. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Finals are here (well for RCL and most standard H2H leagues)! And if you’re like me, and you didn’t have Kevin Durant or LeBron James on any of your teams and got knocked out, it’s baseball time! Shameless plug! Starting next Monday, you can check out my Pitcher Profiles if you’re about to hopscotch to baseball as well. To those of you still in your fantasy basketball playoffs, I HATE YOU! Haha just kidding. It was a whirlwind of sports going on over the weekend: rounding out my baseball drafts/opening night, whittling down to the Final Four in March Madness, Hank Dobson’s Mini-Mart and Country performing on the uneven parallel bars in the Independent Nations Games. A wild time. But what sparked my eye, or ruffled my gander, or something like that the hardest was D.J. Augustin going career-high on us with 33 Pts. Ended his night with a 33/1/3/1/0 line shooting 10-14 (3-4 3PTM 10-10 FT) in a %s dominatrix. My safe word is “gimme more assists!” A huge Sunday sendoff and a big bounce back from that Turd Ferguson earlier in the week against the Pacers. He’s a guy I bet a lot of scuffling teams dropped while streamboating in the playoffs and should be owned in your title run. Not to be confused with your “tittie run”, which might be the most enjoyable 5K anyone could come up with it. Here’s what else I saw over the busy weekend in NBA action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Lakers. The Bucks. Two terrible teams enter. Only one team wins (well, actually neither of these teams are winners, unless you count if they get the first pick in next year’s draft, I guess winning the lottery is something…). Two horrible teams with fast-paced awfulness where we see flashes of fantasy goodness. And we got another taste of the sweet nectar that is Jordan Hill when given playing time! 31 minutes for 28/16/0/1/0 shooting a ridiculous 13-17. With 9 of those boards offensive, Hill was abusing the paint and his shot chart around the rim looked like a rash in Kim Kardashian’s nethers. Everyone that has watched the Lakers lately (a number that has decreased significantly, and would even more without fantasy!) knows Hill should be starting the 4 every night, and it’s taken way too long for D’Antoni to finally go back to him. Even Hill is confused about his playing time based on his profile pic… No Pau Gasol at least for tonight, and Chris Kaman barely arriving on time to last night’s game due to personal reasons might have put a craw in Doh-toni’s gears. There was a report they hadn’t talked in weeks before Tuesday’s game. Before that, Kobe Bryant said he hadn’t talked to D’Antoni in a while during his rant. The Lakers coach is running this team like it’s freshman year of high school. “OMG, like, Mike hasn’t put me in the game, so like, I stopped talking to him and, like just started posting memes on the internet!” I knew it was Kaman! You’re playing with fire, but for guys widely available, if you have a roster spot open Hill is as good as any to give you a really high upside double double tonight. Against the Wolves should be a pretty free flowing game, so let’s all hope Jordan stays over the Hill before we bury Mike D’Anotni underneath it. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy basketball action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Isn’t it nice when everything falls into place? Like when you drive home from work and catch nothing but green lights all the way. I’m not sure what you call that feeling. I say I’m not sure, not because I can’t use a thesaurus, but because I don’t have those kinds of days anymore. I’m sorry to sound all doom and gloom but at this time of year, when I’m dropping one of my favorite players from my fantasy team – one that I followed for every game – I can’t help but react negatively. I know it’s not his fault, or the team, or even the ghost of David Stern. What, he’s not dead? If you say so. Really there isn’t any fault at all, besides the ghost obviously, I just needed more games or I’m not going to win my semifinals match-up. So if you are like me and you’re barely holding onto your last breath of hope in the semis here’s a handful of widely available players to get that last couple of points, or boards, or just whatever it’s going to take stay alive and play for the championship:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there’ll be ThrAGNOF! Full disclosure – I had to look up this song from that movie about a weird looking ginger chick and it’s about coming of age or something. No, not Teeth! Last night, an injury-ravaged, de-taloned Pelicans went out and shocked the Clippers. Kevin Hart, apparently a big Clippers fan, got to travel with LA on a Ride Along I’m guessing. When Jamal Crawford upchucked a three at the buzzer for the win, that arced so high it might’ve hit the Cowboys Stadium scoreboard, Hart started crying when it barely hit rim and got angrier than his little cameo in The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Anyway – Anthony Morrow was a big factor in the upset win, going full-ThrAGNOF 27/5/0/0/1 with two treys. Scoring is the name of his game! Always a high-volume shooter, Morrow just has never stuck in a big role as he doesn’t do anything else. Dude, if he was on a D’Antoni Lakers team, he might break the NBA! With Brian Roberts with a bruised knee, Eric Gordon with an absence of knees, and Austin Rivers with the sniffies, the Pels were without three of their bigger remaining scorers. Looking ahead to tomorrow, the Pelicans get a beignet of a matchup against the former New Orleans Jazz and all three could miss again. So if you need some treys and a little scoring upside in the deeper leagues, it’s that time of year when the scrubs will come out tomorrow! Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Perhaps the funniest catch phrase I made up with my buddies while watching the NBA through college -“Wahhhhhh I’m Jarrett Jack!” – can be used in so many instances. It’s like Brian Dennehy’s speech about how versatile the F-Bomb is when he played Bobby Knight in an ESPN movie. Whomever greenlit that idea, airing a movie with constant F-Bombs on ESPN2, is probably fired. He’s like, “Don’t fire me! Wahhhhhhhhh! Wahhhhhhhhhhh, I’m Jarrett Jack!” I use this phrase because every time I seem to watch him, he looks so so sad. And just look at the cover screen grab for the Yahoo recap from the game last night! So after Kyrie Irving flexed his guns too hard, Jack had three starts of very uninspiring ball. Mike Brown sat him down and said he needed more from him. The veteran responded, “Wahhhhhhhhh I’m Jarrett Jack!” Then last night rolled around with the Knicks rolling out Raymond Felton to play defense. Seriously, it’s like Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory with the blueberry chick. The only difference is Felton actually ate the meals and didn’t chew the LSD-laced gum! After a minute or two, Felton was winded, and went “Wahhhhhhhh, I have to guard Jarrett Jack!” Jack lit up the terrible Knicks D for 31/5/10 with a trey and a side of whoopass. Finally kicking it into gear as the starter, Jack has a four-gamer cooking up for week two of the playoffs, with my eye eagerly on Wednesday at the awful Pistons. It doesn’t really matter who he’s playing, pretty much a must own. Of course, in all my leagues where I’m still alive, he was already snatched up. “Wahhhhhhhhh, I’m Jarrett Jack!” Here’s what else I caught over the weekend in NBA action:Please, blog, may I have some more?