“Whoa JB, two straight titles with ‘Triple Double’ in em. You get an F for creativity, ya wank!” Well, I have an F for you troll commenter! Hard not to talk about trip dubs, especially when you have only two games and with under ten seconds left the dude hurts himself again. Monster line from Blake Griffin in the loss to the Mavs, putting up 25/10/11/1/1 on 9-23 shooting, with 7-7 FT. After missing a game with back spasms, Blake was able to suit up and was no worse for the wear. For 47:51 that is. Well, except maybe getting posterized by Brandan Wright. Bias alert! TNT didn’t show A SINGLE replay of that dunk. Say whaaaa?! Anyway, with under 10 seconds left, Blake took an inbounds pass and rolled his ankle on the court with no contact. They were down six anyway! Reminds me of Rob Gronkowski on the special teams and breaking his arm on a PAT up like 30 points. Eh, maybe not the best comparison, but the game was over! He said his back is ok and his ankle is fine, he’s just clumsy. “Clumsy Clara!” We’ll get more updates throughout the day, but if he has some swelling in that ankle or his back is still jacked when he gets up this morning, we might get a DNP. Which spells terror for title bids coming into the final weekend for standard leagues. Spells apocalypse. Which ironically I found hard to spell for the longest while… The horror. The horror… Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Sometimes there’s not much you can do to affect your situation. If you’re reading this, digging this deep into the murky ether of the worldwide inter-webs for fantasy basketball advice, I’m sure you’ve had a daydream or two about being an NBA baller. We both know, however, for you and I, it wasn’t about not getting enough shots up after practice that held us out of the Association, we didn’t have the talent, pure and simple. But, if you’re petty like me, you might take some ironic comfort in knowing that even some of the Ballers in the NBA get shafted as well. Take Kyle Lowry, for example. He gets snubbed for the All Star game, then snubbed for the replacement players, THEN gets named Eastern conference player of the week, and then receives the worst call of the year, just to burst his bubble. That is a travesty of injustice, and while I’m not shedding any tears for Kyle inherently, it just goes to show that even the elite get effed with. There is a karmic balance going on, people, stop pretending there isn’t, and start paying it forward, eat your vegetables, and help old ladies across the street.Please, blog, may I have some more?
One team. Two broken noses. Four bloody nostrils. One protective face-mask company that has lost a client.
In case you missed it, in the battle of the oldest teams ever in NBA history (yeah, no stat to back that up, but pretty sure George Gervin played a few minutes in the third… [Ok, ok, the Spurs benched all their old guys, whatever!]), both Nando De Colo and Matt Bonner broke their noses and got all bloody. Bonner with his mask still on! On both (De Colo, Bonner) you got some really good in your face camerawork. I feel like both of those could become UFC moves. The “Russian wrister”! The “Livingston shoulder slam”! De Colo gets mad props for coming back in the game in the second half. Bonner gets mad props too for trying to come back in, but Pop wouldn’t have it. Pop hates props! Plus Bonner’s quote, “By tomorrow, I’ll either have a new mask or a new face” is friggin’ awesome. Kinda have a boner for Bonner. While De Colo is not a standard league option, with Tony Parker an elf on the shelf with a bad back, De Colo got 27 minutes 11/3/2/2/1. Near rainbow! It’s actually a pretty light slate of games looking ahead on Saturday, so De Colo could be a nice streamer for you in deeper leagues if Parker stays on that shelf. But as Slim pointed out to me earlier in the week, they’re against Charlotte – a top-5 PPG NBA D, but his defense and boarding should be fine if you need a lil-a-dat from a PG over the weekend. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Man, that title seems all sorts of wrong… But what is right is Nikola Vucevic returned to action last night For a solid 16/10 dub-dub in only 20 minutes. Efficiency! Shot 6-12, 4-4 from the stripe and added a few steals. Very encouraging return for a guy people were dismissing since he had no timetable from the concussion. Concussions can really jack ya up, but hopefully you stayed true on your course to the playoffs and have a dynamic top-20ish big man. Of course the Magic now have lost value in other places, with Big Baby going 5/4/4 in 32 minutes, Arron Afflalo looking like the scrub I’ve said he was all year (still think his 20+ PPG is one of the most preposterous stats this year) and Tobias Harris temporarily moving to the bench. Although T Dawg isn’t Walking Dead (going 9/11/3/1/1 in 37 minutes), he shot like a stiff going 2-8. Afflalo is still a sell as soon as you can, Davis a drop, and hope you bought low on Vuc while there was a window open. Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Breaking news! Kobe Bryant is injured. No one has been talking about this. And in a further Razzball exclusive – he’s old. Not exactly the best combo coming back from a major injury, followed by another pretty bad one just a few games back. After a re-examination, apparently the knee bone still isn’t connected to the leg bone, so let’s call the whole thing off! Will be examined yet again in three weeks, and that’s just another knee rub-rub. Who knows how much longer it will be after that. Good news is! Jodie Meeks is still gonna kill it, Kendall Marshall is still going to hand out dimebags like a Colorado bakery, and with the Lakers still atrocious, we can make a pretty educated guess that Kobe is going to be out A – until he is 100%, no questions asked, no way he could get hurt again healthy or B – the season. Leaning B. And even if A happens, it would be so late and in such limited minutes that I don’t think the value is worth it. Cut him in 10 or 12-teamers. Just do it. I know some people will keep holding him, if you’re in 1st or 2nd and fine for the playoffs and wanna stash, I can’t argue much with you, but I think the time is now to use that spot for others. Tough year for Lakers fans, but hey, you’re not the Bucks… Here’s what else went down across the NBA-o-sphere:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Man… It just hasn’t been the best few years for Kris Humphries… The divorce. The loss of a starting job. Traded as a dump to Boston. But he’s actually been a pretty decent fantasy player lately, including getting a surprise starting nod last night, fairly under-the-radar. Unfortunately, none-a-dat-matters when watching last night’s game! Man, talk about lucking out with the games I got this week, as I had Yahoo highlights for the Celtics at Clippers, and the now-infamous “Welcome to my Poster” dunk. Just dirty from Blake Griffin. If you didn’t see where I cut the highlight, right after Ralph Lawler says “over, and over, and over…” it cuts back to Humphries who gives the easiest to lip read F bomb you could imagine. Hilarious! I lost my cookies all over the office. I shoulda put “And-one” on the highlight too, but my face melted. Getting back to fantasy, Blake can have his own poster this year, producing at a great rate and a great pick even for the unknowledgable NBA fan in your league who reached for him for the highlights. As I mentioned a month or so back, Griffin has been really good this year capped off with a 29/6/8/2/0/highlight of the year line last night. He showed us why fantasy hoops is underrated in the fantasy community. It beats football by actually requiring skill and not small-sample luck, and gives us the best highlights to shove it in the face of baseball. “Oh look, I had Ryan Howard on my team and he actually hit a homer, look at this moon shot!” “Pssshhhh, I had Blake in today and look at him murder Kris Humphries!” (full disclaimer I love fantasy baseball). Enjoy the ride if you nabbed Blake. Here’s what else happened last night in the NBA:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Ohhhh man, the mile run. Nothing establishes popularity in middle school more than the mile run. You have the athletes who can just jog but have to semi-try, the dorks who are OK at sports that do pretty well (me!), the cool kids that just walk, the unhealthy people who saunter, and then the coolest dudes who hide behind the scoreboard on the other side of the track as the teachers and smoke cigs. True story! But the real run to talk about this morning is C.J. Miles‘ run, who’s capped off three straight great games. Hit a ridiculous 10 treys last night, for a 34/5/2/2 line shooting 11-18 and 10-14 from deep. If only someone called it yesterday! And proof to the theory of ThrAGNOF. Got you 10 treys for just one spot start. Great night for Miles and shows us yet again that if you need to stream guys, play anyone facing the Sixers. As I mentioned yesterday, their D is league worst in points allowed by nearly 7 points more a game given up than the second-worst. It’s a fast-paced team with bad D no matter how you slice it. Unfortunately for Miles, the acquisition of Luol Deng is really going to hurt his minutes, making him a guy you’re probably not picking up in standard leagues or solid 12-teamers. Just won’t have the minutes or upside. But luckily he had one last game to show his range and should stay in the mix for deeper leaguers. Here’s what else I saw last night in a big slate of games:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Well, Andrew Bynum is Mr. Glass too… But the other way! And he’s also Mr. Franchise Killer, as the Cavs had to suspend him just to get him to stay out of the stadium. “Hey Andrew, leave the HurryCane at home today, we don’t wanna keep paying the stadium workers to put down the handicap ramps!” Just saves money across the board. Once Bynum gets waived, I think even Obama will be shaking his head at Bynum’s healthcare bills. Anyway, the obvious benefactor to that whole mess is Anderson Varejao, who after his dominating 18/25 game last night has double-digit boards in 4 of the last 5. Varejao was cleaning up the glass like he was the Unbreakable one! The leading rebounder in the NBA last year before he got hurt (at a ridiculous 14.4 a game), Varejao should be a monster in 2014. Although it does help when Nikola Vucevic is hurt and the starting center against you is Jason Maxiell. Hell, I coulda had a double double against them last night! And I don’t even have Jerry Curls! Here’s what else I saw last night across the NBA:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Man! I was loving that game! Through three contests (the inaugural one in the comments then when adopted into the piece), I didn’t get a single win! For shame… At least now with Kobe Bryant missing 6 weeks, we’ll be brimming with excitement to relaunch the game! I never ended up with Kobe anywhere, so I’m downplaying the real fantasy impact here… Kobe owners are asking should I hold or should I let go? I think he is probably a hold in almost all leagues if you can, but man, these top-end injuries are killin’ out there! Plus we have to remember it’s a fractured knee and a re-sewn up Achilles. And he wasn’t setting the world on fire anyway. Kobe is turning into Jeter from last year! Bryant is a medical marvel though, he can jump over cars going 40 MPH and come back after bone spurs a game later. So he’s worth the stash unless it’s a very shallow 10-teamer or smaller, or you’re just a triage of injuries. Here’s what else went down last night across fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yea yea I know… Of all the “Knight” puns, that’s the best ya got?! Man did Brandon Knight have a huge game last night, notching a career-high 36 points for a 36/9/3/0/1 line shooting 13-25 and 6-12 from deep. As you all know, I was a huge Knight fan heading into the year, stuck with him, and think this is what he averages here on out. Wiggity what?! Haha, just kidding to see if you were paying attention. I’ve always liked his ability to board, he’s probably the best pure scorer on that team, and can shoot treys and drive. But I’m a little tired of the “but he doesn’t assist!” from the hate Mafia. Who gives a flip man?! Of course because he’s a PG, he gets dogged for bad Ast:TO, and listen I get it – 8 TOs last night bums hard – but if Ryan Anderson had that line last night, people would be sacrificing live chickens just to meet him. Pedro Cerrano doesn’t like when his PG doesn’t dish! “If Brandon Knight doesn’t average 8 dimes a game, I say forget you Jobu! I do it myself!” Knight will never be an elite fantasy PG, sure, but a very useful one, definitely. He just has to navigate Larry Drew’s mood swings. Get the coach some Midol! Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?